Prophecy : Shin
by xrowa-chanx
Summary: When the Order discovers a series of poems giving clues to the whereabouts of the Heart, the lives of the Exorcists helping them begin to spiral out of control. Can the ultimate sacrifice be made or will the word 'nakama' ultimately destroy everything? CONTINUED ON DIFFERENT ACCOUNT - search the49thname
1. Chapter 1:  109

**Hey there ~ ! This fanfic is called [PROPHECY / S H I N] and is set in the world of the D Gray Man anime/manga - I am not following canonical events however (but not by too much *laughs*). Shin is Japanese for prophecy btw. This is my first D Gray Man fic (cue fleeing? ^^') so be... nice? *gulps* Anyways, I hope you enjoy this fic and reviews would be much appreciated :L**

**Also, this fic is set after the talk between Cross and Allen about the 14th but I am not following canon after that point in time - i.e. the 'death' of Cross, events in Paris with Timothy, the awakening of Alma Karma etc. do not occur or at least occur differently or in a different order. I have my reasons :L**

**[SUMMARY]: When the Order discovers a series of poems giving clues to the whereabouts of the Heart, the lives of the exorcists helping them begin to spiral out of control. Can the ultimate sacrifice be made or will the word 'nakama' ultimately lead the whole world to destruction and ruin?**

**[PAIRINGS]: Lavi x Allen, Kanda x Lenalee (plus some slight Allen x Lenalee and Lavi x Lenalee)**

**[WARNINGS]: M rated for language, violence and implied sexual situations (yaoi and het). Don't like, don't read.**

**[MAIN THEME]: Red - Already Over**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_I'd give it all to you_

_Letting go of me_

_Reaching as I fall_

_I know it's already over now_

_Nothing left to lose_

_Loving you again_

_I know it's already over, already over now_

_**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**_

Chapter 1 - 109

A cold winter sun shone down on the Black Order that bleak December day, the biting wind causing the returning group of Exorcists and Finders to hurry towards the many floored black building with their coats wrapped around themselves tightly. The mission they had just gotten back from had been terrible; the Innocence they had been sent to find had already been destroyed by the Noah Devit and Jasdero by the time they had reached the Franco-German border, and the two men had clearly been expecting them if the huge numbers of Level Twos and even Threes were anything to go by. All but two of the group's Finders were eradicated by the Akuma and Chaoji and Marie sustained injuries bordering on fatal. Only Kanda's powers as a Second Exorcist had kept him reasonably intact.

They were losing the war; that much was obvious. So far the Order had only gathered 30 pieces of Innocence, including the 15 used as Anti-Akuma Weapons by the Exorcists. 3 pieces were of an unknown state, 50 pieces had been destroyed by the Noah and there were still 25 pieces of Innocence yet to be found by either side. The Order only had 10 Exorcists that could go out in the field and only 4 Generals remained alive. The Heart was still unknown to both the Order and the Noah. And the situation wasn't improving.

"Welcome back!"

The returning group looked up. By the gate of the Headquarters building stood a girl of around 17, her shoulder length black hair whipping about her face in the cold wind.

"Che, just let us in Lenalee. It's fucking freezing out here."

"Nice to see you too, Kanda." Lenalee murmured sarcastically, moving aside to let the bad-tempered Exorcist past. Looking back down, her eyes widened when she spotted the barely conscious Chaoji and Marie being half-carried inside by the two remaining Finders.

"What happened? Are they okay?" she asked in alarm, helping the Finders inside. She frowned when she saw the many cuts and bruises on the two Exorcists.

"We were ambushed by Akuma and two Noah. The Innocence had already been destroyed by the time we got there," one Finder explained, carefully lying Marie on a stretcher so a nurse could take him to the infirmary. The other Finder did the same with Chaoji. Lenalee said nothing.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

Lenalee sat in troubled thought in the Cafeteria, her food turning cold as the minutes passed. Why had that Finder's news made her feel so anxious? Yes, they had lost another piece of Innocence and both Marie and Chaoji had been badly injured. And, yes, the Noah now seemed to anticipate all their motives and ambush them at every possible moment. But the Heart was still hidden and no more Exorcists had been killed; that had to count for something. But, no matter how hard she tried, Lenalee could feel only pessimism towards their situation. There were only 25 pieces left. And the Heart could be any of them. Or...

The raven haired Exorcist shuddered. She could still remember that hushed conversation between Lavi and Bookman. She hadn't meant to overhear; she had been serving the Science department coffee and they so happened to be sitting nearby within earshot.

_"So... you think she's the Heart then."_

_"I have my suspicions. Her Innocence acts sentiently and protected her twice from harm. No equipment type should be able to do that. In addition she is the first person to have Crystal Type Innocence."_

_"Yet Allen's Innocence protected him and prevented him from dying too. Couldn't he be the Heart?"_

_"No. If the 14th truly resides within him, I don't believe he would have been able to synchronise with the Heart - the two forces within him would be too opposite to each other. However, there is much that we are speculating. We will just have to wait until some solid evidence is found."_

Being an Exorcist and fighting the Akuma and Noah was frightening enough. If she was the Heart... Lenalee shuddered again. It was a position she would not wish upon anyone, never mind herself. To be synchronised with the source of all Innocence, to be the sole desire of both the Black Order and the Noah... She would never be free from this war. Never. Her fists clenched under the table.

"Lenalee?"

Startled, she looked up. Standing in front of her was Allen, a look of concern on his face as he placed his impossibly full tray of food on the table and sat down. Lenalee gave a small smile.

"I'm fine, don't worry about it. Just tired," she explained quickly, eating her cold tomato soup as if to prove that there was nothing wrong. Allen shook his head slightly with a smile. "So, how've you been lately Allen? It's seems like ages since we've been able to catch up."

"It does, doesn't it," Allen replied with a laugh. "I'm... okay. The amount of missions lately have been pretty heavy but it could be worse."

For a while they sat in amiable silence. Then, while continuing to eat her soup, Lenalee glanced up and met Allen's gaze. They both knew something was bothering the other and that neither of them felt okay, yet they both knew that they couldn't voice their troubles. So they pretended everything was fine, lying to feel some sort of comfort. But it worked. Lenalee and Allen smiled.

_**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**_

"Your next mission is to go to a village called Saint-Vincent-de-Paul in Aquitaine, France. A Saint is believed to have been born there, hence why the villagers re-named their home from Pouy to Saint-Vincent-de-Paul. We believe there to be a piece of Innocence residing within the area which is stopping anyone from entering the local church. You will be going as a 6 man team by Ark, train and foot and make sure you complete this mission as quickly as possible."

Allen, Lavi, Miranda, Kanda, Link and Bookman all nodded at Komui. The raven haired Chief took the manila folders from the 5 Exorcists and the single CROW and gave them a small smile.

"Good luck..."

With that, they left Komui's cluttered office and headed towards the main hall where Allen could summon an Ark gate to Paris. Linking his hands behind the back of his head, Lavi turned towards Allen with a grin.

"Been a while since we've been on a mission together, ne beansprout?"

"The name's Allen! You're almost as bad as Kanda..." the white haired Exorcist exclaimed, giving Lavi a half-arsed shove whilst trying not to smile. It had been a while and, though he wouldn't admit it in his company (because he'd take it the wrong way), he missed the red head's company at times. Emphasis on the last part.

"What was that, _moyashi _?" Kanda asked with a glare. Allen turned towards him indignantly before receiving a harsh glare from the blonde CROW stomping beside him.

"All three of you are being pathetic. Carry on and we'll never reach the main hall, never mind France." Link snapped. Lavi, Allen and Kanda fell silent. Until...

"Hey, Two Spot, why're ya tagging along anyway?"

"My name is not Two Spot!"

"Yeah, sure... Hey, you and Allen can come as a pair!"

"Shut up Lavi!"

Just as Link and Allen both tried to restrain themselves from hitting the smirking Bookman-in-training, they reached the main hall. It was alive with activity; returning Exorcists and Finders, nurses carrying the injured to the infirmary, members of the Science Department travelling from the European Branch to the Asia Branch and vice versa. Pushing their way through carefully, they stopped in front of a spot reserved for them and quietly waited as Allen sung the 14th's Lullaby in his head in order to open an Ark Gate. Soon enough, a white gate with the number 9 appeared in front of them. Without a word, Allen stepped through followed by Link, then Miranda, Lavi, Kanda and Bookman last of all.

Their mission had begun.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"So, here is the plan for the next few days: when we get to Bordeaux in 6 hours time we will walk the final 142 kilometres of the journey. If we follow the main roads heading south-west from Bordeaux, we should reach Pouy in 2 and a half days worth of travelling if we only stop at Belin-Béliet tonight and Onesse-et-Laharie tomorrow night. The land is pretty flat so we should make good time." Link explained, pointing to the various cities and villages on a large map of France in front of him. "Can you make an Ark gate straight to the Order from Pouy, Walker?"

Allen nodded in reply. The others all tried not to grimace. 142 kilometres in 2 and a half days was no easy feat and, even if the land was flat, the weather would certainly slow them down along the way.

"At least we can spend the next 6 hours doing nothing," Lavi grumbled. Bookman promptly hit him round the back of the head.

"Lazy idiot! For that, you can spend the next few hours writing records!"

"Eh? _Lǎo tóuzi,_ that's harsh!"

"No it isn't. Now come along. Or do I have to pull you along by the ears like Matron?"

"Ahhhh I'm coming I'm coming!" Lavi yelped, leaping up from his seat as if ants had just bitten his behind. Giving the others a quick wave, the red head apprentice followed his master into the next carriage. Miranda giggled.

"Is Lavi always so hyperactive?" she asked Allen, smiling. The white haired Exorcist nodded, grimacing a little. There had been so many occasions where Lavi had refused to stop talking on train journeys, even when Allen looked like he was already half-asleep and in dire need of rest. And let's not forget the constant invasion of his personal space and lewd teasing remarks that bordered on being inappropriate. Miranda laughed at Allen's expression.

"D-don't get me wrong though! He's still a good friend, he just needs to calm down a little." Allen replied quickly, waving his hands in front of him.

"As do you, _moyashi_."

"The name's Allen, you idiot! How many times do I have to tell you?"

"You're the idiot, idiot."

"Oh, that's really inventive Kanda. You're certainly not very intelligent, are you?"

"Keep it up, _gonkurame_ ! I'll use Mugen to carve you a new belly button!"

"Hah, I'd like to see you try!"

"Mugen Unsheathe, Innocence Activate!"

"Innocence Activate, Crown Clown!"

"Alright, stop it RIGHT NOW!"

Allen and Kanda both froze, weapons pointing at each other's throats, turning to glare at Link who had interrupted their fighting... again.

"Do I have to seal the both of you?" the blonde CROW murmured darkly, cracking his knuckles. Allen and Kanda shook their heads, albeit relunctantly. "Good. Now sit down and be silent. We have a long day ahead of us."

Both Exorcists complied, glaring at each other nonetheless.

The next few hours passed by in almost complete silence. Allen spent his time sleeping, head lolling against the window. The others simply sat in silence, gazing out the window or at nothing in particular within the carriage. Eventually, after nearly 4 and a half hours, Lavi and Bookman re-entered the carriage carrying several rolls of parchment as well as pots of ink and quills. Lavi looked exhausted and rather depressed which improved both Kanda and Link's moods vastly. Allen began to snore.

"Hey, Miranda, can ya budge up a bit so I can sit down?" Lavi asked, receiving a nod from the brunette in reply. When Lavi noticed the fast asleep Allen, his lips pulled up into a grin. "Man, beansprout sure likes to sleep huh."

Pulling out a quill and pot of ink, the mischievous future Bookman leant over and started to draw all over Allen's unsuspecting face, sniggering. Before Lavi could finish writing 'I am a beansprout' on Allen's forehead, a gloved hand shot out, punching Lavi square between the eyes and sending him flying towards Link and Kanda sitting across from them. Miranda looked like she was having a heart attack.

"Owowowowowow did you have to hit me with your left hand? You're such a jerk!"

"What do you think you're doing, Lavi?"

"You were asleep so I thought it'd be fun to draw on you!"

"What's wrong with you? Y-you don't just draw on people while they sleep!"

"... Why not?"

Allen slapped his forehead with a hand and sighed exasperatedly while Lavi chuckled like an idiot. Deciding to give-up, the white-haired Exorcist sat back down, using his sleeve to wipe off the drying ink on his face. Looking out the window, he noticed that the beautiful French countryside was slowly giving way to more urbanised settlements; they were nearing the outskirts of Bourdeaux.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The_Gare de Bordeaux Saint-Jean___was alive with activity when the Exorcists got off of their train. The afternoon sun shone down brightly through the grimy windows, illuminating the busy station as the local people boarded or waited for their trains. Gripping his suitcase tighter, Allen followed the others through the crowd towards the exit. When they finally managed to get outside, Link took out his map and studied it carefully. After about a minute of silence, the blonde put the map away, nodded to the rest of the group, and set off alongside the others down the main road leading out of the city.

There now lay 142km between them and their destination. Once they reached the outskirts of Bordeaux they'd have to walk in a south westerly direction towards the small town of Belin-Béliet. The going would be reasonably okay since the land was flat for the most part. If it rained heavily, however, they would have to deal with flooded tributaries and lots of mud. And it often rained in this region, known locally as Gironde. Even as they started to leave Bordeaux behind dark grey clouds could be seen on the horizon.

When the group were about 4 hours away from Belin-Béliet, the pitch black darkness punctuated only by the red, white and yellow of Lavi, Allen and Link, the rain began to fall. 10 minutes later, it was chucking it down. The group's mood sunk. As the hours passed, Kanda and Allen continued to bicker incessantly, Lavi seemed to find it necessary to comment on everything and anything they crossed, Miranda had slipped and fallen in the mud so often that her Exorcist uniform now matched her brunette hair and both Bookman and Link looked like they were on the verge of having aneurysms. So, when they did finally arrive at the _Chambre d'Hotes à Lilaire___in__Belin-Béliet__at around midnight, all 6 members of the group couldn't be happier to have reached their first checkpoint. Upon reaching the quaint little inn, a smiling unshaven blonde man in his mid twenties came to greet them.

"_Bonjour, mes amis_. How can I help you?" he asked in a lilting French accent.

"We'd like some rooms for the night." Link answered bluntly, looking at the reception with a mild look of disdain at how French it all looked. Lavi rolled his eyes.

"_Bien sûr, monsieur_. How many rooms?"

"As many as you can offer 6 people."

The Frenchman scratched his stubbled chin thoughtfully. "We only have 4 rooms free at the moment, I'm afraid."

"Fine. We'll take them." Link replied, turning his nose up. "You'll be paid by the Black Order upon our return there in a couple of days time."

"E-ehh? But___monsieur___you cannot just stay for free and expect me to wait upon a simple promise for payment!" the man spluttered, giving the blonde CROW a disbelieving look. Link scowled.

"You will have to wait! We are without money and do not have the time to deal with the likes of you currently."

"Excuse me, _bâtard___! No matter what supossed order you come from, I have a business to - "

"Back down, Jacques."

A slightly younger man with a less distinctive French accent, short messy brunette hair and brown eyes stepped forward from a door to their left, holding a bundle of blankets under his left arm.

"Louis! But - "

"_Tais-toi_!"

Louis gave the blonde inn keeper a glare before giving the bedraggled Exorcists a small apologetic smile.

"My apologies, Clergymen. My good friend here," the man answered, elbowing the Frenchman in the stomach, "was not informed of your arrival. You may have the rooms; they can be found at the end of the corridor over there. I've prepped them with blankets so no need to worry. Breakfast is served at 08:00. Oh, and the shower is next to the kitchen, _mademoiselle_," the man explained, giving the mud covered Miranda a sympathetic look. She scarcely noticed.

"Thank you!" Allen and Lavi answered simultaneously, both looking like they were going to cry in pure happiness. The brunette gave them a nervous smile.

The group left the two inn keepers to talk, or argue judging by the angry mutters they were giving each other, and headed to their respective rooms. Except Miranda, who headed to the shower with plodding feet and an exhausted expression.

"Who's sleeping where?" Lavi asked, stifling a yawn as he looked at the others questioningly.

"I will be sharing a room with Walker," Link replied immediately, sending the white haired teen a distrustful look that said teen ignored.

"As long as I'm not with the _moyashi_, I don't care," came the curt reply from Kanda. Allen scowled.

"The name is Allen, you thick-skulled moron!"

"... What did you just call me?"

"Well, if you're too stupid to catch on quick enough..."

"Do you want me to cut you to shreds ? !"

"Like hell you'll be able to!"

"I've had enough of this!"

Both teens froze, surprised. Standing with a livid expression between them was Bookman, eyes dark with annoyance. Lavi stepped back a metre or two fearfully.

"Kanda, Allen and Lavi - get in this room," Bookman snapped, pointing towards a door to their immediate right. "Link and I shall share this room to our left, and Miss Miranda will take the last one."

Before anyone could argue, the old man entered the room to the left of him and dragged Link in with him. Lavi, Allen and Kanda entered the other, shutting the door behind them.

"Is Bookman always this scary when he's angry?" Allen asked, blinking. Lavi nodded, looking traumatised.

"Never annoy a tired Gramps. Trust me."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The next day came far too soon in Lavi's opinion. The night before had been pretty much spent trying to ignore Allen and Kanda's nearly incessent bickering. Sitting down in the communal dining room with a huff, he ran a hand through his messy red hair and picked up a slice of toast.

"I am so damn tired..."

A couple of minutes later a half-asleep Miranda stumbled into the room and sat down beside him with a yawn.

"_Guten tag___Lavi. Did you have a good night's sleep?" she asked, picking a croissant from a nearby plate. Lavi laughed.

"I shared a room with Allen and Kanda, what do you think?"

"I should have guessed as much," Miranda replied with an amused smile. Just then, both Allen and Kanda walked into the dining room, looking annoyed with each other already. Sitting down as far away from each other as possible, Allen across from Lavi and Kanda beside Miranda, they ate their breakfast in stony silence. Lavi and Miranda blinked.

"A-are you two okay?" the red head asked tentatively, noticing the ferocity (and speed) with which Allen was eating. The white haired teen gulped down a glass of water and smiled.

"I'm fine." he lied, slamming his glass down loudly and carrying on eating. Lavi sighed. Before Louis the inn keeper, who had been standing near Allen with a mortified look at the amount of food he was eating, could have a heart attack, Link and Bookman entered the dining room cloaked and ready to go.

"It is time to head off, all of you," Bookman called. The others begrudgingly stood up and abandoned their breakfast. Just as the group were about to leave once they were wearing their cloaks and carrying their belongings, Louis and Jacques appeared behind them with a hamper filled with fresh fruit and cheeses and bottles of wine and water. Allen and Lavi's faces lit up.

"We wish you luck on your mission, Clergymen," Louis said with a small smile, handing the hamper to Allen. The white haired Exorcist returned the smile as he and the others started to walk down the path towards the nearby road.

"_Bonne chance, mes amis_! Our house is always open to you!" Jacques called out, waving.

The Exorcists waved back as they headed down the road. The sun was shining, all traces of the rain from the evening before drying away in the morning sunlight, a light wind carrying the smell of the cheese in their hamper down the road as they walked. They still had a way to go until Saint-Vincent-de-Paul but, even so, they all felt much happier than they had the day before.

The rest of the day passed with little incident. They all enjoyed eating the food from the hamper by the side of a nearby stream at lunchtime (though Allen complained that he was still hungry afterwards), Lavi actually kept his mouth shut for at least an hour, Miranda only tripped once and Kanda and Allen only argued 20 times or so. They reached Onesse-et-Laharie by about 9 pm and the inn where they stayed was comfortable and the chef there did excellent food and happily cooked mountains of food for them.

The next day dawned with overcast skies and bitterly cold temperatures. The Exorcists left early, at about 6 am, to head to their final destination, drawing their cloaks around themselves tightly against the freezing wind. A thick mist covered the ground, hiding their surroundings. Lavi drummed his fingers on the head of his hammer uneasily.

"Something's going on here alright..." the future Bookman murmured. Kanda narrowed his eyes and gripped his sword firmly with a gloved hand.

The clock on the tower of the Pouy Church chimed 3 times as the Exorcists reached the small village of Saint-Vincent-de-Paul. An old man with a stooped back and walking stick greeted them at the village gates.

"Welcome Exorcists to the recently re- named village of Saint-Vincent-de-Paul, that was formerly known as Pouy. We are grateful to have you here."

The man led them slowly, limping as he walked, towards what looked like the village center. Haggard people dressed in ripped clothing stood in the doorways of small cottages, staring at them with hollow eyes as they passed. Miranda gulped. They soon reached a small church with a tall clock tower, its stone bricks gleaming with frost and frozen ivy leaves. The old man turned around.

"This is Pouy Church. We have been unable to go inside of it for a good couple of months now, which is why we look so downtrodden; we need our place of Christ back. Please Exorcists... save our church!" the man pleaded, his eyes desperate. Kanda rolled his eyes, stepping forward.

"Get out of my way! Mugen Unsheathe, Innocence Activate!"

Running his index and middle fingers along the blade of his sword, Kanda activated his weapon and swung it in front of him with a swift flick of his hand. Calmly, showing only composure on his face, the Japanese Exorcist walked towards the door of the church and opened it. Almost instantly a large force propelled him backwards, sending him flying into Bookman who caught him with a slight wince. Kanda shoved the old man away with a scowl.

"Che. Six Illusions! First Illusion: Netherworld Insects!"

Small many fanged insects materialised from Kanda's sword, flying towards the open door of the church with a hiss. Before they could enter the church, they were destroyed with a bright green flash. Cursing, Kanda repeated the move only to achieve the same result. However, the third time he did so, a slight cracking sound could be heard. Kanda smirked. Taking the sound as a good thing, Lavi took out his hammer from its holster and Allen raised his left hand.

"Innocence Activate, Crown Clown!"

"Big hammer, little hammer: Grow, grow, grow!"

Allen's arm transformed, his sleeve disappearing to reveal a thin black arm and long clawed hand, a white cloak with a furry collar appearing around him. Lavi's hammer grew in size significantly. The red head adjusted his eye patch with his free hand and gave Allen a grin.

"Rock paper scissors?"

"Sure," Allen replied with a laugh, shaking his head slightly. Soon enough, Allen lost - you couldn't really cheat at rock paper scissors. Smirking triumphantly, Lavi stepped forward. Waiting until Kanda stopped his onslaught on the door momentarily, Lavi raised his hammer into the air and twirled it.

"Innocence Activate!"

A variety of seals appeared around the top of the hammer, spinning with it. Gripping the handle tighter, Lavi jumped up and hit one of the seals with his hammer.

"Direct Fire Seal!"

The red head swung the hammer in a circle, a red seal showing the kanji for fire burning brightly on its faces. With a loud smash he hit the doorway with his hammer, fluorescent flames fighting against the green glow of Innocence, visible cracks of emerald light appearing in the open doorway. Panting slightly, Lavi turned around and gave Allen a grin.

"Think ya can finish the job, kid?"

"Of course. And stop calling me that." Allen replied, giving the red head a quick elbow in the stomach. Lavi winced. Stepping past the keeled over Lavi and Kanda (who seemed very annoyed that Lavi and Allen had gotten involved at all), Allen raised his left arm.

"Cross Grave!"

With a quick flick of his wrist a brightly shining white cross appeared on the doorway and, with a flash of white, the cross exploded. Something shattered. Stepping backwards, Allen noticed that the cracks were gone and a dull green glow illuminated the area around them. Lavi holstered his hammer.

"Too easy..." Allen murmured, eyes narrowing.

Warily, the group of Exorcists entered the church, leaving the villagers outside - normal humans couldn't go near Innocence. The church was small and barely furnished, the only decorations being the stained glass windows and a single statue of Jesus at the top end of the church. Before its feet lay a fluorescing green object; the Innocence. Grinning triumphantly, Lavi walked forwards and, bending over, picked up the shard of Innocence. Then he froze. Tucked under the shard was a slip of paper, folded up and stained with age. Two Hebrew symbols were written on the outside.

"Hey Gramps, what does this say? I can't read Hebrew." Lavi asked quietly, walking towards Bookman and handing him the slip of paper, the Innocence held tightly in his free hand. The old man frowned then blinked, eyes widening.

"It says 'the Noah'"

The silence that descended upon the church was deafening. With pursed lips Bookman opened up the piece of paper carefully, making sure not to rip the paper.

23 8 5 14 20 8 5 13 21 19 9 3 15 6 2 19 20 18 15 25 5 18,

16 12 1 25 19 5 15 18 1 12 12 20 1 18,

1 14 4 2 14 7 15 6 1 20 8 15 21 19 1 14 4 25 5 1 18 19,

7 9 22 5 19 2 1 3 11 23 8 1 20 23 5 8 15 1 18,

6 15 21 18 20 5 5 14 23 9 12 1 15 13 5 15 14 5,

15 14 5 23 9 12 1 15 13 5 15 14 5 - 8 21 14 4 18 5 4 1 14 4 14 9 14 5,

1 14 4 1 12 12 23 9 12 12 6 1 12 12,

1 14 4 18 5 20 21 18 14 20 15 19 15 13 5 20 8 9 14 7 13 15 18 5.

"It's in code..." he murmured, handing the slip of paper to Lavi. He frowned, eyes narrowing. Just as Lavi handed the code to Allen, a look of confused understanding on his face, Bookman saw a faintly drawn symbol in the top right hand corner of the paper. He froze.

"Allen, could you hand that to me please?" Bookman asked, voice quiet. Allen complied, frowning a little. Inspecting it closer, his heart beating faster and faster, Bookman's eyes widened as he confirmed his suspicions.

"What is going on? Bookman?" Link asked, stepping forward. Miranda, who had been standing at the back of the group, stepped forward too, looking confused. Bookman looked up, his eyes meeting Lavi's, then Link's.

"Written upon this piece of paper is a numerical code, 'the Noah' written in Hebrew and a symbol... the symbol of the Heart."

All stood still.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Bookman was tired. In fact, he hadn't been so tired since he first took Lavi on as an apprentice and had to put up with his daily antics, which were far more annoying than at present (which some would find hard to believe). He had barely slept since they had returned from Saint-Vincent-de-Paul. De-coding the poem had taken little effort - the numbers resembled the letters of the alphabet so the poem read as such:

_When the music of the destroyer,_

_Plays for all to hear,_

_And the being of a thousand years,_

_Gives back what we hold dear,_

_14 will become 1,_

_1 will become 109,_

_And all will fall,_

_And return to something more._

It had been child's play. The meaning for the most part, also, seemed easy to understand. The destroyer was Allen Walker; his full title being the Destroyer of Time. The reference to music indicated Allen's connection to the Musician. The being of a 1000 years was the Millennium Earl. The 14 were the Noah, the 109 the pieces of Innocence. But one thing kept bugging Bookman as he sat in the Black Order's library; what did the poem mean by 14 becoming 1 and 1 becoming 109? And what of the world ending also? Was the Heart really all that they assumed it to be? Bookman frowned, eyeing the small slip of paper and the translation that he had made with thoughtful eyes.

"Hey Gramps!"

"Hay is for horses, brat!" (AN: See end)

In the doorway of the Library stood Lavi, a number of scrolls under his arms as well as a small black box. Bookman scowled.

"What are the contents of that box, Lavi?"

"Nothing really. It's not important." the red head replied calmly, walking towards Bookman and setting the scrolls down on his table, tucking the box in his trouser pocket. Scowl deepening, Bookman decided to drop the subject momentarily; he'd find out what his apprentice was hiding soon enough. Noticing a scroll full of numbers and random addition, the old man raised an eyebrow.

"Should you not be trying to figure out the meaning of the clue opposed to adding up like a small child?" he asked, mildly amused. Numbers had always fascinated his apprentice for some reason and teasing him about it had always been a source of entertainment for the man. Lavi pouted.

"I was just messing around, jeez. Get off my case, will ya!" Lavi mumbled, crossing his arms childishly. Bookman tried not to smirk. Just as Lavi was going to give a retaliating comment about Bookman's hair, a flustered Arystar Krory stumbled into the library, hair askew and cheeks flushed as if he'd been running. The red head chuckled.

"You okay there, Krorykins?"

"I-I'm... ahh fine... We have... a new... mission..." Krory replied, panting. Lavi groaned.

"Already? We only got back from our last one yesterday!" he complained, fighting back the urge to slam his head on the desk. Bookman simply sighed. Abandoning their scrolls of parchment, the two members of the Bookman Clan followed Krory to Komui's office.

When they reached the unbelievably messy paper strewn office of their leader they saw that they were in a group with Lenalee, Allen (again) and a little boy of only 9 years or so. He had long blue hair tied up in a ponytail and, oddly enough, a circular jewel stuck on the center of his forehead. The boy in question was pouting.

"Ah! Thank you for getting them, Krory." Komui said cheerfully, clapping his hands together. Krory gave an exhausted smile in reply.

"So... what's our mission now, brother?" Lenalee asked.

"You need to go to the Kandariya Mahadeva Temple in Khajuraho, India. Our Finders stationed in the Madhaya Pradesh noticed activity that could indicate the presence of Innocence within the area," Komui replied, handing the 5 Exorcists manila folders containing the mission brief. The young boy raised an eyebrow at pictures of a number of erotic sculptures that seemed to be from within the temple.

"Aren't religions supposed to be against this sort of thing?" the boy questioned. Lavi patted him on the head with a laugh.

"Kid, the sculptures are all about love - the main aspect of most religions. Plus, the sculptures are really old and things were different then anyway. Unfortunately..."

"'Unfortunately'?" Lenalee echoed, cracking her knuckles menacingly. Lavi gulped.

"Um um a-anyway, kid, what's your name? Are you our latest recruit or what?" the red head stammered, changing the subject quickly to avoid being pummeled. The boy crossed his arms.

"The name's Timothy. Nice to meetcha."

"We discovered him in Paris whilst you were at the other end of France - he can transfer his soul to other people's bodies as well as Akuma. He can destroy them from within using Innocence." Komui explained, ruffling Timothy's hair fondly. The boy kicked Komui between the legs in reply. Lavi and Allen winced.

"S-so, all we need to do is go to the temple, find the Innocence and come back in one piece?" Allen questioned, giving Komui (who was now curled up in a ball on the floor) a sympathetic look. Komui nodded.

"You spent quite a bit of time in India with General Cross, right Allen? Could you make an Ark gate near to the temple?" Lenalee asked, picking her brother up from the floor.

"I've never been to the Madhaya Pradesh area before, but I spent quite a bit of time in Delhi and we can travel by train easily from there." Allen explained, his expression turning depressed at the mention of his master. Lavi and Lenalee sighed exasperatedly.

"R-right guys, off you go! Ow, ahh good luck!" Komui said, standing up with a wince.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The main station within the city of Delhi could not have been busier. Though the winter cold held Europe in it's icy grip, the temperatures in India that day were almost unbearably hot. The Exorcists soon found themselves wishing that their uniform was any colour but black.

"Why must the Innocence be in such a hot place?" Timothy whined, holding onto a water bottle like it was a life line. Allen turned around and gave him a smile as they waited for their train to the town of Satna.

"You'll get used to the heat eventually, Timothy."

"Ahh, our train's here!" Lenalee cried, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as their train came hurtling into the station. Within a couple of minutes they were onboard the moderately cool train. They were meant to have been in the first class carriage but the local people were not fond of the Exorcists – they were affiliated with the Catholic Church, after all, and the area was mostly Hindu. So, instead, they had ended up in the second class carriage amongst the civilians of Delhi. It was very crowded. In fact, very crowded would have been an understatement.

"I... can't... breathe..." Lavi wheezed, stuck between two rather large business men carrying suitcases. Allen tried not to laugh.

"Oh deal with it, brat. We only have 13 hours left of the journey to go," Bookman replied, giving his apprentice a scolding look. Lavi pouted.

"Says the one sitting in a chair." the red head mumbled.

The old man simply ignored the comment. The hours passed reasonably slowly, the early morning sunshine giving way to the afternoon and then the evening. By the time the Exorcists reached the station at Satna, the sun had set and night was fully upon them. The Exorcists got off of the train and gave a sigh of relief.

"Ahh, to be able to breathe normally again..." Lavi murmured, stretching his arms upwards with a relieved smile. The others, apart from the lucky Bookman, did the same.

"Are we going to the temple now or are we going to rest in an inn for the night?" Krory asked quietly, flicking his fringe out of his eyes. Bookman scowled in thought.

"I think we should rest. The temple is not going anywhere and we must be at full strength tomorrow in case of a battle." the old man replied. The rest of the group smiled in relief.

After a little way they found a small hotel called the Hotel Om Palace. It was only two floors high and made of brick, but the sign saying 'fully air conditioned rooms' warded off any doubts that they had. Upon entering the establishment, a small man in his forties with a walking stick came to greet them with a large grin.

"Welcome, dear customers! How may I be of assistance this evening?"

"We're from the Black Order. We need accommodation for this evening for all of us," Bookman replied, parting his travelling cloak so the man could see the crest on his uniform. The room fell silent.

"We don't like your kind here," the man murmured, giving the crest and the entire group an apprehensive look. "Wherever you go you bring death and destruction to all that help you..."

"We mean you no harm, sir," Timothy said quietly, looking at the man with what could only be described as puppy dog eyes. "We're on our way to the town of Khajuraho tomorrow and just need some rooms for this night only. You do not need to provide us with food or anything else if it bothers you."

The man shook his head slightly. "I will not have any customer staying here not try our chefs' legendary food! You may stay here, Exorcists. But if you cause any problems, you will be sorting them out on your own." he answered quickly, looking to the side. The Exorcists nodded.

"Follow me."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Their rooms could have been better – they were small and barely furnished. Krory swore fervently that he spotted a cockroach crawl into a hole in the corner of the wall in his room. But it was to be expected. Though the Exorcists were greeted warmly in most places in Western Europe and North America, a lot of areas that were not fans of the Catholic Church, or Christianity in general, did not welcome them with open arms. They would have to deal with any discomfort whilst away from home.

They had been given 3 rooms. Bookman and Lavi shared one, Allen and Krory shared another, and Lenalee and Timothy shared one together. When they all settled down in their respective rooms for the night, Lavi noticed that Bookman was still cloaked and booted, as if he was about to head out somewhere.

"Where ya going, Gramps?" the red head asked, cocking his head slightly. The old man gave him a serious look.

"The poem that we found in France has been bothering me. I feel like it is part of a bigger picture, that we're missing something important from all of this. There is a library here that has been used by the Bookmen for centuries; I will be going there now for a little while to gather some information." Bookman explained quietly, adjusting his cloak. "If I am not back by tomorrow morning, I trust that you will have all your wits about you to record what needs to be recorded."

"Yeah, yeah, Gramps, no need to tell me that," Lavi replied, rolling his eyes. "Don't go get yourself killed, okay?"

"Pah, I do not need such warnings, brat," Bookman replied, giving his apprentice a light slap across the head. Lavi winced. As the old man left the room though, Lavi noticed a small smirk on his lips. The red head smiled.

The door shut with a slight creak, leaving Lavi alone. Lying back with a huff, the red head stared up at the ceiling for a while before reaching into his trouser pocket to pull out the little black box that he had been hiding from Bookman since that morning. Opening it up, the dim light from the moon outside reflected on the face of a beautiful compass made of silver. Lavi held it up, smiling. As he turned the compass over to see the back of the object, looking at it with a slightly torn expression, the engraving on the back seemed to gleam in the moonlight. _Allen Walker._

"That idiot better like this…"

Suddenly, a knock on the door resounded throughout the room before it opened. Slightly panicked, Lavi shoved the compass underneath his pillow and sat up just as Lenalee walked into the room. He gave the girl a smile.

"Hey there. Can't sleep?" he asked, noticing her weary expression.

"Timothy's snoring like there's no tomorrow, so I thought I'd come and bother you for a while; Allen and Krory are already asleep." Lenalee explained, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Where's Bookman?"

"He had to head out somewhere for research. He said he might not be back in time for tomorrow but that we should go on without him if that happens," Lavi answered, stretching a little. Lenalee sighed. Just as she made her way to sit down on Bookman's bed she spotted the black box lying on top of Lavi's bedsheets. Lenalee cocked her head.

"What's that?"

Cursing inwardly at his carelessness and knowing that Lenalee would realise instantly if he lied, Lavi gave her a sheepish smile as he took the compass out from under his pillow and handed it to the girl. Lenalee observed it curiously then gave Lavi a smile and raised eyebrow when she saw who the compass was for.

"How much did this cost, Lavi? This is made of pure silver... And you got Allen's name engraved on it too." Lenalee murmured, her curiosity heightening when she spotted a faint blush on Lavi's cheeks. The red head chuckled.

"Let's just say I had to save up my wages for quite a bit to be able to afford it..."

"... Bookman doesn't know about this, does he..."

"Nope. He'd flip if he did."

Lenalee gave the compass back to Lavi with a smile. "I never knew he meant this much to you," she said, noticing gleefully how Lavi's expression went from embarassment to mild panic. Before he could counteract such a statement, someone knocked on the door. Swiftly, the red head tucked the compass back in it's box and placed it in his trouser pocket.

"Come in," he called.

The door opened. In the doorway stood a yawning sleepy Timothy, clutching his blanket and dragging it behind him as he walked into the room.

"You coming back t' sleep, Pigtails?" the boy mumbled. Lavi grinned at Lenalee's nickname.

"Sure, Timothy," Lenalee replied with a smile, ruffling the boy's hair fondly. She turned back towards Lavi and chuckled. "You'll explain things tomorrow, won't you?"

"T-there's nothing to explain!" Lavi said indignantly, blushing. Lenalee smiled and rolled her eyes then left the room with Timothy, shutting the door behind them. Lavi huffed. As he settled down to sleep he frowned, thinking back on Lenalee's questions. Why _had _he spent so much money and effort on Allen's birthday present? For some reason he found himself recalling Noah's Ark; the battles with the Noah, Chomesuke, almost dying. But one memory in particular stood out - his battle with Road. Waking up to find himself on fire, hearing Allen shout his name, feeling a hand on his as the white cloak that formed Allen's Innocence wrapped around both himself and the other boy, shielding them from flames he didn't remember creating. But most of all he remembered feeling Allen brush their foreheads together either accidentely or purposefully, he didn't know. And those words... The words 'Please come back' said so painfully, like Allen's heart was breaking. As Lavi drifted off to sleep and the memories faded, he heard a voice murmuring softly, calling from his subconscious as the power of dreams took a hold of him.

_There once was a being_

_Whose heart was turned to stone,_

_It felt for none,_

_It cared for none_

_And it ended up alone._

Sleep descended upon him.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The next day dawned with the same heat as the day before. Even at 9 in the morning, when the Exorcists arose from their rooms, had a quick breakfast and left the Hotel Om Palace.

"Where's the old _b__âtard_?" Timothy asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"He went somewhere last night, for some research, ya know? He said if he wasn't here by now that we should carry on with our mission without him." Lavi replied, pulling his bandana up from his neck onto his forehead. Krory yawned sleepily.

"Well then, shall we head off?"

The group set off walking in the direction of Khajuraho. They were intitially going to travel by train to their destination but they had been misinformed about there being a train that travelled from Satna to Khajuraho in their mission brief. Komui had probably already found out and slaughtered whoever had made the mistake, especially since Lenalee was on the mission.

It was going to be a long walk; 6 hours in the scorching heat with little to no shade along the way through the semi-desert surroundings. Less than half way Timothy started to fall behind, so Lavi gave the poor kid a piggy back. This earnt him a black eye, though the young French boy didn't turn down his offer anyway. Krory was soon complaining about the lack of water and Allen was soon complaining about being hungry. Lenalee lost her temper on multiple occasions. So, all in all, by the time they reached the Kandariya Mahadeva Temple, all 5 of them were in foul moods.

"Greetings! Welcome to..."

"Get outta my way!"

The man who had come to greet them stood in shock as Lenalee brushed past him angrily, stomping as she went, trailing sand from her shoes as she passed. The rest of the group, looking sullen and exhausted, soon followed. The poor tour guide's shoulders slumped.

After a little bit of searching, and a little more walking, the group of Exorcists found the temple. The large structure had to be ancient; it was made of a building material similar to that of the Egyptian pyramids. The many erotic sculptures covering the outside of the temple, also, gave away its age.

"This temple was built in honour of the Hindu god Shiva," Lavi murmured, shielding his eyes with a hand as he looked at the temple with something close to appreciation on his face. Lenalee's eyebrow twitched.

"Let's just get this over with, hmm?" the girl said sharply, glaring at the red head who seemed far too interested in a statue of a naked woman. Lavi laughed sheepishly.

"Oi! Get off me, will ya!"

"Someone of your age should not see such innapropriate things," Krory said calmly, continuing to cover Timothy's eyes with a gloved hand. The boy pouted.

"It's okay, Krory, the statues inside are fine for Timothy to see," Allen murmured, looking around in awe. Places like this always left this impression on him; somewhere of religious importance, a feeling of time never changing, eternity trapped in one room or place. The white haired Exorcist smiled as the group walked up the steps leading to the main altar. In awe also, Krory lowered his hand.

"Guys?"

The 4 boys turned towards Lenalee.

"What is it?" Allen asked, noticing the confusion on Lenalee's face. The girl looked around, frowning.

"It's silent."

Quieting down, the others noticed it too. Where before there had been the background noise of tour guides and people walking from place to place, there was now only a heavy silence. It was deafening. Lavi fingered his hammer nervously. Then, they heard someone clap.

"Seems we can finally start the party, hmm?"

The Exorcists turned. Standing by a huge statue of Shiva was none other than Tyki Mikk. He gave them a pleasant wave as he took off his tophat and placed it on the floor. Everyone activated their weapons instantly.

"You're not taking the Innocence!" Lenalee shouted, her ruby boots reflecting the afternoon sunlight. Tyki simply laughed.

"Oh? And you will be the ones to stop us, hmm? What fun."

Behind the Noah appeared dozens of Akuma; Level Ones, Twos, Threes, even a few Level Fours. Allen could scarcely move from utter shock.

"My eye... why didn't it... ?"

Tyki laughed. "Yes, I was wondering about that also. That cursed eye of yours should have picked up these Akuma the instant they appeared anywhere near here. No matter..." the Noah said darkly, spreading his arms wide as a purple glow enveloped his hands. "Shall we dance?"

The battle began.

The Akuma darted forward like a unified monstrous blur, heading straight for the Exorcists. Allen gritted his teeth. Using Edge End, the first wave of Akuma flew backwards, destroyed almost instantaneously. The second came soon after. Lavi grew his hammer and used it almost like a giant baseball bat, the bright symbol for fire on the hammer's faces making the Akuma's features glow fiery red. The Level Twos didn't last long. Krory tried to keep as many Akuma away from Timothy as possible, using his fangs and nails as his mode of attack. Timothy had already used Divine Possession to possess a Level Two and was using it's disintergration ability to great effect.

Then Tyki joined the fray.

Allen had a split second to react before the Noah sent a wave of Dark Matter in his direction. He darted sideways. Transforming his left arm into the Soul of Exorcism, he blocked Tyki's next attack, gritting his teeth.

"Been a while, boy."

"It has, hasn't it. Can't say I've missed you."

"You're so cruel to me."

Tyki jumped backwards, smirking.

"Are you going to be able to protect your precious comrades this time, hmm? They seem out of their depth already."

Allen looked to his right. Tyki wasn't wrong; Lenalee was battling with a Level Four, struggling to restrain it's hands which were glowing with Dark Matter. Lavi was covered in cuts and bruises and surrounded on all sides by a number of Level Threes and Twos, his movements random and confused. Krory could no longer keep an eye on Timothy due to a Level Four doggedly dodging his attacks and Timothy himself was greatly outnumbered and could scarcely avoid the attacks of the Akuma surrounding him. Allen gritted his teeth in anger.

"Well, boy, what are you going to do? Let your friends die? You can't protect them whilst you're fighting me," Tyki said gleefully, noticing Allen's torn expression. "But if you try to go to them, I'll pull out that pretty little Lenalee's heart."

"Fuck you!" Allen cried, swinging his sword and missing Tyki by mere inches. The Noah laughed.

"My my, you've gotten ruder, boy."

Allen had no idea what to do. There was no way they were going to win this battle, that much was obvious. But how could they escape? They needed to find the Innocence, first and foremost. If they returned to the Order without it, there would be a lot of trouble to deal with. But where was the Innocence?

Suddenly, a shape darted past the two of them, a trail of Akuma following. Allen squinted. Who had just passed them?

"Oh? Seems one of your comrades is trying to flee," Tyki sneered. Allen ignored him and threw his sword at his face. Tyki ducked, smirking.

"You want to play rough? Fine, let's play rough."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Lavi ran through the temple as fast as his legs could carry him. The Akuma tailing him sent bullets his way, but he used his hammer to deflect them. What on Earth was happening to him?

A voice, a voice in his head. Murmuring to him. Calling to him. It was so distracting that he almost ran straight into a pillar. If he had the time, he would have laughed at his lack of direction. A Level Three sent a ball of sticky material his way, exploding on the pillar that Lavi ducked behind. As it collapsed, he ran into a passageway to his right, following the voice.

"If I'm going insane, Gramps is gonna kill me," Lavi murmured to himself, dodging this way and that to avoid more bullets. But even as he said it, he disagreed with himself. He could have sworn that Lenalee at least heard it too; Lavi heard her ask herself if she was hearing things just before a Level Two hit her and threw her backwards.

He was leaving his comrades to deal with all of the Akuma and Tyki, he knew that. But as he passed Allen he could read his expression like a book; he thought they were going to lose. And, if even Allen didn't believe that they could keep fighting, then they wouldn't keep fighting. So, if Lavi followed this voice, which was increasing in volume, and found the Innocence then Allen could make an Ark gate and get them out of there. Or Lenalee could use her Dark Boots to get them as far away from the temple as possible. If there would even be a temple by the end of the battle...

"Found... me..."

Lavi froze. The voice had been so loud that he could have sworn that someone had said those words in his ear. Looking to his left he saw a faint green glow eminating from a small passageway near his feet; he could get through if he crawled.

"Firestamp: Hellfire and Ash!"

A giant fiery serpent flew towards the Akuma at the end of the passage that he had just left. It would distract them long enough. He hoped...

Shrinking his hammer as small as possible, he got down on all fours and crawled through the small passageway, wincing as the stone ceiling rubbed slightly on a wound on his head. It was a tight fit. After about 20 seconds of crawling he reached a chamber that was just about high enough to allow him to stand up. The only light came from the bright green glow of what could only be a shard of Innocence.

"Got ya."

The voice had completely dissipated now. Lavi could hear the Akuma in the cavern on the otherside of the passageway, trying to find him. He was running out of time. Walking forwards, he picked up the Innocence. Then he noticed it. His heart stopped.

"_Wǒ kào_..."

Lying there, on the small pedestal where the Innocence had been, was a slip of paper. Just like the one from the church in France. It wasn't folded. On it was a neatly drawn map, showing a detailed view of a town called Bath. Picking it up with shaking fingers, Lavi placed it in his pocket and made his way back into the small passageway, his breathing shaky. What was this? Was the Heart trying to be found? Or was this all part of some bigger plan, one that he and everyone else didn't know about? His head was starting to hurt, blood dripping down his neck and onto the dusty stone floor.

When he exited the passageway and stood up, he noticed that the Akuma were gone. In fact, he couldn't hear fighting anywhere. His heart began to beat faster.

"The others...!"

Starting to run, Lavi darted out back the way he had came earlier, noting that his serpent had managed to destroy a few Level Twos. As he ran he found himself thanking himself for having a perfect memory; the temple was almost like a maze. Chuckling to himself despite the situation, Lavi knew that Allen would be lost in seconds if left alone here.

Eventually, he reached the main chamber. It was empty. No bodies, no Akuma; nothing. Lavi's eyes widened.

"Where is everyone?"

He increased the size of his hammer instantly, fearing the worst. Then he heard someone cough painfully. Turning around sharply, he spotted the heel of someone's shoe; Lenalee. Lavi ran forwards, panicked. When he reached the girl, he noticed that she had a pretty severe wound on her arm and neck but apart from that was not badly injured. Lavi sighed in relief.

"A... Allen..." Lenalee breathed, her eyes pained. Lavi froze. Looking around, he saw an unconscious Timothy in Krory's arms, who was bleeding profusely from a head wound. Krory himself was on the verge of passing out, bleeding all over. But no Allen. Allen was missing.

"Allen's gone... Lenalee, where is he?" Lavi asked, placing his free hand on Lenalee's shoulder. The girl seemed on the verge of tears.

"I couldn't... stop him... Used... Ark gate... to... to..."

It all became clear.

"He used the Ark gate to bring Tyki and the Noah away from the temple..." Lavi murmured, numbness setting in. A tear slid down Lenalee's face.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]:

- moyashi = beansprout (japanese)

- lǎo tóuzi = old geezer (mandarin chinese)

- gonkurame = dumbass bastard (japanese)

- bonjour, mes amis = hello, my friends (french)

- bien sûr, monsieur = of course, sir (french)

- bâtard = bastard (french)

- mademoiselle = miss (french)

- tais-toi = shut up (french)

- bonne chance = good luck (french)

- bâtard = bastard (french)

- wǒ kào = fuck me (mandarin)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Anyone who can de-code the code get cyber cookies ~ ! **

**AN: The phrase "Hay is for horses, brat" is taken from a fanfic called Bookman by Dhampir72. It is a very very good fanfic (that is sadly discontinued) – well worth reading, trust me!**

**It's on this website so search it up when you have the time.**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Reviews would be much appreciated ^v^**

**xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 18/05/12**


	2. Chapter 2: In Two Parts

**Hey there ^^ Thank you to Stavarn100, JustAnotherAnonymousReviewer, hollieobygollie, OceanicCrownClown and The 'Me' Defined for reviewing! *gives cookies* It seems I made the code too easy to crack which makes me feel stupid XD However, it is more the meaning of the poem opposed to the de-coding of it that is important so... yeah... ^^'**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Once to speak before the world, rend bare my heart, and show_

_The lesson I have learned, which is death, is life, to know._

_I, if I perish, perish: in the name of God I go._

Christina Rossetti; A Royal Princess

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 2 – In Two Parts

The journey back to Satna was the worst journey that Lavi had ever taken. His head burned in the dying afternoon sun, the blood from his wounds drying from the ever present heat. They had to travel by using his hammer, which was just about withstanding the burden of himself, a barely conscious Lenalee and Krory, and the unmoving Timothy (who was lying over Lavi's shoulder).

After Lavi realised what had happened back at the temple, he found himself unable to speak. There was nothing that any of them could do; only Allen had access to the Ark and they couldn't wait at the temple for him to return without endangering their lives due to their injuries. That helplessness and frustration ate away at them as they neared the town of Satna. 

By the early evening they had arrived, feeling woozy from dehydration and blood loss. Deciding to return to the hotel from earlier that day, Lavi extended his hammer to just outside the doors of the Hotel Om Palace. After stopping, he fell to the ground with a thump.

All faded to black.

When the red head awoke, he found himself in the bed he had slept in the night before at the hotel, his wounds dressed and cleaned. It was daylight. Sitting up gingerly, he spotted Bookman sitting on the edge of the other bed in the room, the shard of Innocence that Lavi had recovered in one hand and the mysterious slip of paper in the other. The old man looked up, expression unreadable.

"So you are finally awake."

"How are the others?" Lavi asked instantly, his voice etched with concern. Bookman narrowed his eyes.

"They will recover in time," he answered simply, standing up and placing the items in his hands on the bedside table. "I have informed the Order of Allen Walker's disappearance. We need to return to England."

"How? It'll take forever to get back without the Ark..." Lavi murmured, looking down at his bandaged hands dejectedly. The last time Allen had been alone with Tyki... Lavi remembered how he had felt back then, watching Allen get hurt and almost killed by that monster of a Noah. Unable to help. Unable to do anything. And Lenalee, crying like that on the forest floor... Lavi clenched his fists.

"That boy, Timothy... He can possess and use the powers of a Level Two Akuma, correct?" Bookman said, narrowing his eyes at his apprentice. Lavi looked up, frowning.

"Yeah, I think so... why?"

"When I went to the library yesterday evening, I noticed something odd about one of the people working there. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that she was an Akuma. She did not notice me."

"So what?" Lavi asked, frown deepening. Bookman crossed his arms.

"She is a Level Two who can teleport. That's what."

Lavi's eyes widened slightly. "So... we can use Timothy to get back to England!"

"Yes. He is currently unconscious, however, so we shall have to wait until he is fit to use his Innocence," Bookman explained. Lavi nodded in agreement. "Now, though, we must try to unravel this new mystery."

Bookman held up the map carefully. "Describe yesterday to me. Don't leave out a single thing."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

He couldn't go on much longer.

Slumped against the wall of an alleyway, Allen pressed a hand against a deep wound on his side, his hands dripping crimson. He had been fighting for God knows how long, battling against the Akuma he had dragged into the Ark. He had destroyed quite a few of them now; there couldn't be more than a dozen left. Odds like that normally would have filled him with hope but he could feel only worry as he ran around the Ark.

Tyki wasn't there.

Back in the temple, it had gotten to the point where he knew that if the others continued to fight, they would die. And the fact that Lavi had gone missing... He couldn't let his comrades die on any circumstances. So he created an Ark Gate and used his Innocence to drag all of the Akuma in with him. But where Tyki had been one minute, he was gone the next. He had simply disappeared. Before Allen could even try to find him, the Gate closed, leaving him with the Akuma on one side and his friends with Tyki Mikk.

"Damn it..."

Allen winced. More of his blood dripped to the ground. He had to destroy these Akuma first. He could worry about everything else later. As a Level Four came flying around the corner of the alleyway that he had been hiding in, Allen found himself smiling.

"Just keep walking... and don't stop."

Leaping forwards, the white haired teen gave a yell as he used his Crown Belt to grab onto the Level Four to try to impale it on his sword. The white mockery of an angel dodged the tendrils of Innocence, sniggering as Allen winced at his wounds.

"Having problems, Exorcist?" it asked, smirking devilishly.

"The only... problem here... is you," Allen panted, grimacing as he coughed up a bit of blood.

"Oho, if you say so!" the Akuma chortled. "The main problem here is that I don't want you to die before I kill you!"

Chuckling as it went, the Level Four flew into Allen and aimed a ball of dark matter at the teen's stomach. Gritting his teeth, Allen grabbed the Akuma before him by the neck and flung it away, wincing as the dark matter brushed against his side and burnt him. With a crash the Level Four smashed into a nearby building, causing the whitewashed structure to crumble around it into pieces of rubble.

Screeching angrily, the Akuma built up energy in its palms and threw the dark purple coloured balls at Allen, who dodged the attack with a quick roll to the side. Raising his anti-Akuma weapon, Allen swung it forward and released a large beam of green energy, the sheer power of it cracking the ground beneath as it hit the Level Four with a loud explosion of light.

"You bastard!"

Eyes glittering with an almost insane fury, the Akuma got up and raised its hands, a purple aura surrounding it. As its hands rose, bits of building and pavement floated into the air and surrounded Allen. The white haired Exorcist gripped his sword tighter.

With a scream the Akuma dropped its hands, the debris falling downwards with such speed that Allen barely had time to lower his mask and use Crown Clown to destroy and dodge the rocks above him. Just before Allen reached the top layer of debris, a sharp jolt of pain from a wound on his torso made his vision blur. With a loud thwack, a large stone block dropped on his head and sent him spiralling downwards, red drops of blood falling with him as he hit the floor.

"Heeheehee, I've got you now!" the Akuma cried joyfully, grinning as the remaining debris fell on and crushed Allen. Sauntering forwards, the Level Four hummed as it made its way to the pile of rubble.

Suddenly, with a smash, the Sword of Exorcism flew out of the debris and missed the Akuma by mere inches. It smirked.

"You missed!" it cried, laughing.

"No... I haven't."

Blinking, the Level Four watched as the stone blocks exploded into miniscule fragments, eyes widening as it noticed Allen standing upright, a hand pressed aganst the wall behind him to keep him from falling over. The Exorcist's uniform was in tatters, blood trickling from his many wounds.

Allen smirked.

Soundlessly, the Sword of Exorcism impaled the Akuma from behind, sending it flying straight into Allen. With a choked cry the Akuma smashed into Allen, the sword impaling the white haired teen. The Level Four screamed at the Innocence invading its body, eyes wide in pain and hatred. Allen grabbed the sword's hilt from behind the Akuma and shoved it in deeper, making the Level Four scream louder.

And that was when the pain started.

Allen screamed as he felt something deep inside of him writhe in agony, the sensation of something breaking apart making him feel as if his insides were being ripped apart. The pain increased until Allen's vision started to blur around the edges, white noise erasing the sound of his screams. Then, all of a sudden, his consciousness slipped, all turning to black.

And Something Else woke up.

The Level Four froze and stopped screaming as Allen smirked sadistically, his eyes glinting with a malicious golden haze. A horrifying aura surrounded the white haired teen, and the Akuma began to tremble in fear. Smirk widening, Allen raised his hands and cupped the Akuma's face.

"Good evening, Noah."

Crying out in agony and terror, the Level Four disintergrated and blew away in the cool breeze wafting through the Ark. And, with a sigh, Allen's eyes returned to a dull exhausted silver just before he hit the ground with a thump.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The room span slightly as Lenalee sat up, her hands clutching the edges of the bed tightly as her vision cleared. There was a severe pounding in her head, and her neck stung terribly. But she lived. Just as she felt herself smile at being alive, her expression crumpled. Allen was missing.

"Oh Allen..."

Tears slid down and pattered onto the bed sheet as she tried to stop herself in vain from crying. But all she could remember was that moment in China; Allen all alone, bleeding, dying. And that Noah hurting him in such a way... Lenalee buried her face in her bandaged hands.

"It'll be okay, Lenalee."

Looking up, Lenalee noticed that Lavi was standing in the doorway of her room, expression pained. The girl wiped her eyes.

"H-how are you feeling?" she stammered, sniffing and trying to regain her composure. Lavi gave a small smile.

"Like crap. You?"

Lenalee blinked then smiled. "Not much better, I'm afraid."

With a slight laugh the red head sat down on the edge of her bed, fiddling with the hem of his bandana thoughtfully. After a while, he patted her bandaged hands.

"We'll find him. I promise," Lavi murmured seriously, looking her straight in the eyes. Lenalee leant forward and hugged him gently.

"I know. I just… don't want him to be all alone like before…"

She felt Lavi wince as she said it. She rubbed the small of his back comfortingly. Eventually they broke apart, both smiling slightly and blinking back tears.

"So, what's the plan from now on?" Lenalee asked quietly, tightening a bandage on her arm and wincing slightly. Lavi sighed.

"Gramps has found a Level Two Akuma in town that can use teleportation so when that little kid wakes up he can use his Innocence to possess the Akuma and take us to England."

"… We're not waiting for…"

"No. When he finishes with the Akuma and that Noah he'll come back to the Order. We can't afford to wait," Lavi murmured, slight regret in his voice. Lenalee's expression softened. "Plus, I found another clue with the Innocence which we need to check out before the Noah discover it."

"Another clue?"

"Did Komui explain what we found in France?" Lavi asked. Lenalee nodded. "I found a slip of paper with the Innocence back in the temple. It was a bit of a map for the town of Bath, which is in England. Gramps thinks we should go and investigate it before going back to the Order."

"Is that safe, considering how beaten up we all are?"

"We can't afford to let this wait, Lenalee. Plus, Gramps seems to want to act rather cloak-and-dagger about all of this; I think he wants to keep this whole clue thing quiet from Central until we fully know what we're dealing with."

"… Okay, I understand. Do… do you have any ideas what the clues could be about yet?" Lenalee asked tentatively, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. Lavi laughed.

"Not really, no. I definitely think the Heart wants to be found now, maybe by us since it can't just be coincidence that we found another clue on this mission without knowing it was there beforehand. But I don't trust it either. It seems all too easy to find these clues and the way the first clue was coded was so easy to unscramble, like it wanted to be easy to read. And the first clue talks about the world ending too. What if the Heart isn't as good as we assumed it to be? It could be bad for all we know…" Lavi explained quietly, looking out the window at the rising sun. "I still think we should keep trying to unravel this mystery though, before the Noah catch on to what's going on."

Suddenly, the door opened. It was Bookman.

"Ah, Miss Lenalee. You are awake," the old man said quietly, noticing the closeness of his apprentice and the girl sitting in bed. His eyes narrowed marginally.

"Yes. Thank you for attending to me, Bookman," she replied with a slight smile, nodding her head. Bookman did the same.

"Timothy is now awake, so I suggest the two of you get something to eat and get ready for a potential fight," Bookman explained. And with that, he left the room. Lavi chuckled.

"Well, better do what Nurse Bookman says, right?"

Lenalee laughed. Helping her up, Lavi went with Lenalee down to the dining room and sat down with two bowls of curry. While they ate, Lenalee found herself remembering the compass from the night before.

"Lavi?"

"Yes?"

"Do you like Allen?"

Lavi promptly choked on his food. After a little while, which he spent coughing and spluttering red-faced, the apprentice Bookman looked up indignantly.

"Lenalee, I like Allen no more than a best friend would. I like women!"

"Oh, is that so…"

"P-plus I'm gonna be a Bookman one day too, a-and we're not allowed relationships anyway."

"Oh, really…"

"Stop it."

"Stop what?"

Lavi pouted. Deciding to ignore the girl grinning mischievously in front of him, he tucked into his meal with vigor, cheeks still red with embarrassment. Of course he didn't like Allen! He placed his spoon in the empty bowl before him.

Then, as Lenalee finished her meal also, Bookman walked into the dining room with a rather pale Timothy and an exhausted Krory. Lavi and Lenalee stood up.

"Are you ready to leave?" Bookman asked, adjusting his travelling cloak with a hand. The two Exorcists nodded. "Then let us set off."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"So, Tyki-pet, you have something important to tell me? "

"Please stop calling me that..."

Lighting a cigarette, Tyki put his legs up on the table he and the Millennium Earl were sitting at.

"I saw something interesting while in India," Tyki murmured, taking a long drag from his cigarette. "I learnt from one of the Order's little pawns that a group of Exorcists were heading to a temple in Khajuraho for some Innocence. I just had to gate crash, of course. And who else would be there but the 14th and his 'precious comrades'."

"Go on. "

"The Boy's eye didn't pick up any of the Akuma that I brought with me. Not a single one."

The Earl leant forward in his chair eagerly.

"As well as that, both the girl and the red head who follow the 14th everywhere didn't put up much of a fight either; like they were distracted." Tyki explained, tapping ash onto the table. "Then Eyepatch Kid suddenly ran away from the battle. I had to find out why, of course. So when the Boy used the White Ark to fight the Akuma alone, to protect his comrades and nurse his hero complex no doubt, I followed the Bookman apprentice's trail."

"And? " the Earl questioned, the tension within the small dining room increasing, his glasses reflecting the glow of Tyki's cigarette. The curly haired Noah smirked.

"The brat found the Innocence. I would have taken it from him and ripped out his apparently non-existent heart but he found something with the Innocence; a piece of paper. It seemed to be important, for he started shaking like a leaf. There isn't much use killing someone with knowledge so I let him live. For now." Tyki grinned menacingly.

"You have done well, Tyki-pet. I trust you will follow them and find out about this piece of paper. "

"Sure thing, Earl."

Tyki left the room, humming as he did so, leaving the Earl to ponder on the news given to him. The head of the Noah Clan chuckled darkly as he pictured what would be done to the Exorcists once Tyki found them.

"Your time will come, Exorcists. "

Suddenly, a voice rang clear in the Earl's mind, making him flinch and screech in anger.

_Good evening, Noah._

"Fou-Fourteenth ? !"

The Earl's features contorted with hatred and wrath, his eyes glinting with an anger terrifying in magnitude. Slamming his hands onto the desk before him so hard it smashed in two, the Millenium Earl gave a manic grin.

"Good evening to you as well, Fourteenth. "

As the Earl started to chuckle, the dying sun outside reflected off of rounded glasses and with a rustle the glasses disappeared, only a few pure white feathers being left behind.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"That woman there?"

Timothy pointed a trembling finger at a tall brunette stacking shelves with books. He glared at his finger until it stopped shaking. Bookman nodded. The boy closed his eyes, ignoring the pain racking his body, calling to his Innocence. Before him, though the others could not see him, stood the spiritual embodiment of his Innocence; Tsukikami. It looked like an older version of himself, with purple hair and pointy ears wearing a long white kimono. Tsukikami smiled.

"_Ready to go, Master_?"

The young boy nodded.

"Innocence Activate, Divine Possession!"

Timothy's soul flew out of his body, heading straight for the Akuma before him. Looking back quickly, he noticed that Tsukikami was giving him a thumbs up and a grin. Turning back towards the brunette woman, Timothy shoved out the Akuma's soul, converting the true form of it's body into his 'own' form. The Akuma's soul cried out loudly, looking around in shock. Tsukikami immediately destroyed it, leaving behind only a few specks of spiritual dust. The now Innocencified Akuma, that Timothy was controlling, turned towards the Exorcists.

"All done."

Lenalee, who had been holding onto the souless body of the young boy, gave a slight squeak as Tsukikami took hold of Timothy's body to control it and gave her a rather inappropriate squeeze on the arse. Lavi grimaced.

"_I'll be controllin' Master until we get ta England_," Tsukikami said, his voice lower than Timothy's. The others blinked.

"And... who exactly are you?" Lavi asked, looking from the converted Akuma that had drifted in front of them to 'Timothy' in confusion.

"_I'm Tsukikami, my Master's Innocence. I can control his body whilst he possesses Akuma_."

"So Timothy is within the Akuma and you are within Timothy's body?" Krory asked, sitting down against a bookshelf. Both the Akuma and Timothy's body nodded.

"Well, to save us getting completely confused, how about we call the Akuma Timothy and you," Lenalee said, pointing towards Timothy's body, "Tsukikami. Okay?"

"Sure, Pigtails!" Timothy replied, sitting down on the floor cross-legged. "It'd make more sense that way anyway."

The group all nodded. Deciding to escape from the library, where a number of people were staring open mouthed at Timothy, they made their way to the outskirts of Satna. Along the way the Exorcists became increasingly entertained as Tsukikami tried to use the roller-skates that were part of Timothy's outfit, tripping often. When they eventually reached an area with little housing and more desert than anything, and Tsukikami was bruised and battered and covered in dust, Timothy turned around to face the rest of the group.

"The Akuma I'm possessing can teleport but I'm not sure how far I can go," he explained, scratching his head. "I could do a test run by myself first to somewhere nearby, then try going further away."

Bookman shook his head. "We don't have that much time on our hands I fear that the Noah and the Earl will find out about the clues soon and things will become far more difficult for us when they do."

"B-but what if I can't get us all the way to this Bath place? What if I can only go to places where this Akuma has gone or or..."

"_You've gotta try, Master. I'm sure ya can do it if ya try_," Tsukikami said, giving the possessed Akuma a smile. Looking slightly less nervous Timothy closed his eyes and concentrated. Then, after a while, he opened his eyes and looked at Bookman.

"Where do we need to go exactly?"

"A town called Bath," Bookman replied, showing Timothy the map. The Akuma nodded.

"I can take us there, but I might cause some damage to the area where we arrive," Timothy explained, grinning nervously. Lavi laughed.

"The Order can pay for it!"

"You mean my brother," Lenalee said menacingly, giving Lavi a harsh look. The red head gulped.

"Now is not the time, comrades. Let us make haste," Krory murmured quietly, placing his hands on Lavi and Lenalee's shoulders. Bookman nodded in agreement.

Floating towards them, Timothy picked up Lavi, Tsukikami and Lenalee in one hand, Bookman and Krory in the other, and closed his eyes. Purple energy started to build around them. Then, with a bright flash, they disappeared.

It was a bright sunny day in Bath that day. For once the weather typical of the region and the entire country was elsewhere and, for once, the townspeople could enjoy a day of sunshine and nice weather. Most were out in the park; eating picnics, walking dogs, feeding the ducks. One couple decided to fly kites with their two little sons. Until a bright flash dropped a large white thing carrying 4 people on their kites and destroyed them, as well as destroying most of the surrounding area. The two sons began to cry. As did Timothy.

"Pwaaaaaahhhhh! Pwaaaaahhhhh! PWWAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

Dropping the Exorcists to the ground, Timothy continued to cry loudly, causing nearly the whole park to turn towards them. Tsukikami rolled his eyes.

"_Jeez, Master, calm down will ya_?"

Poking Timothy's forehead, the boy's soul fell out of the possessed Akuma's body, soon turning it to dust. Tsukikami then left Timothy's body and led the boy back to his body. Soon, Timothy was Timothy again. Looking up and rubbing his arms, he gave Tsukikami a glare. His Innocence laughed in reply, then disappeared.

"I... really need a day off..." Lavi wheezed, sitting up gingerly and wincing at his new wounds. Lenalee nodded. Somehow Bookman had managed to escape the crash and was standing in perfect health in front of them, an annoyed expression on his face.

"Come on, we have to go find the Innocence, you fools!"

"5 more minutes, Eliade..." Krory mumbled.

"Great, now Krorykins is talking to his dead girl again..." Lavi said despairingly. Hauling the man up, he gave Krory a few hard shakes. "Get a hold of yourself!"

"AHH! Oh, we-we're here? Sorry, L-Lavi," Krory stammered, looking around in confusion at the giant crater and the sniffling Timothy. Lavi sighed.

"It's fine. C'mon guys, let's go finish this then go home."

The group had been wandering around aimlessly for hours, finding and feeling nothing. They had asked countless people if anything strange had been going on in the area, but all gave them the same answer: No. Things in Bath couldn't have been more normal. Deciding to have a break, the Exorcists sat down on a bench near the local river.

"This is getting us nowhere!" Timothy complained, crossing his arms and pouting. Krory sighed and re-tied a few bandages around his arms that had come loose.

"There's no use in complaining though," Bookman said scoldingly. "The map that we found in India said clearly that we should head to this town. The Innocence is here somewhere, we just have to search harder."

"We're searching pretty hard though, Bookman," Lenalee murmured."And none of the townspeople seem to have noticed anything that would usually suggest that there is Innocence here. Maybe the map doesn't mean anything..."

While Lenalee and Bookman continued to debate whether there was anything in Bath or not, Lavi sat in silence. Looking up at the sky, he found himself wondering where Allen was at that moment. Was he safe? Had he reached the Order somehow? Would he be there waiting for them when they returned? Then, realising that he was pining after his friend like some love-sick puppy, Lavi mentally slapped himself.

Sighing and looking across the river thoughtfully, the red head noticed the other side of the river but, upon further inspection, revealed a huge abbey. It was old too; it had to have been built in the 10th or 11th century. For some reason this set off alarm bells in Lavi's mind, as to why though he had no idea. Then it came to him.

"Guys, I think I know where the Innocence is."

The others fell silent, looking at him sceptically. The red head coughed.

"The other pieces of Innocence to do with this clue were all found in places of religious importance," Lavi said thoughtfully, pointing at the abbey near to them. "We could try that big abbey over there, maybe?"

"Hmm, seems there's some intelligence within you after all," Bookman murmured. Lavi grinned.

Not needing to be told twice, the group of Exorcists made their way to Bath Abbey, knowing not if Lavi had guessed right or if they were following another lead that would get them nowhere and waste their time. It didn't take long to reach the large medieval looking building, and the whole area was full of tourists and locals.

"Seems this is quite the tourist hotspot, hmm," Krory said, trying to avoid being trampled by a group of Japanese school children. Lenalee giggled.

"Well, we won't know until we try," Timothy replied, ducking under a woman's skirt with a gleeful smirk.

Upon entering the abbey, the Exorcists immediately felt the presence of Innocence; it was faint, but enough to confirm that Lavi was no idiot. Following the building pressure from the shard, they found themselves in an abandoned corridor of the abbey, littered with signs saying to keep out due to renovations. The Exorcists ignored them, of course.

They continued forwards until they reached a locked door, a green glow emanating from the gap underneath it. There was no doubt in their minds that the Innocence was inside the room before them

"Innocence Activate! Compass of Spells: North Crime!"

Unfurling a scroll, Bookman invoked his Innocence and summoned a dozen needles which struck the area around the door handle with a dull thunk. With a sharp flick, the handle fell out and the door swung open.

Lying on top of a copy of the Holy Bible lay a shard of Innocence, glowing brightly within the dark and gloomy room. And, underneath the table that the Bible and the Innocence was resting on, was the dead body of a priest. He had been dead for a very long time; there was little skin on the rotting corpse and the skeleton could be clearly seen amongst the ripped clothes and decomposing flesh. Clutched in the corpse's right hand was a folded slip of paper. Bookman instantly took the Innocence and put it in his pocket.

"I don't like this," Timothy said quietly, hiding behind Lenalee fearfully. The girl patted the younger boy on the head comfortingly.

Stepping forward, Krory gently removed the slip of paper from the dead body's hand. On the outside of it were words in a language that he could not understand. When he passed the piece of paper to Bookman, however, he could read it instantly.

"What does it say, Bookman?" Krory asked, noticing that the old man's eyes had narrowed.

"It's Mandarin and says Xīn. It means Heart, or the Heart."

For a while, no-one spoke.

"What does it say inside, Gramps?" Lavi asked quietly, breaking the silence. The old man opened up the slip of paper carefully.

_Je suis dans deux parties_

_Qui allient ensemble._

_Un coeur perdra._

_Un coeur retrouva_

_Et un personnage ne sera pas plus._

"It's in French. It reads as such in English: I am in two parts that combine to form as one. A Heart is lost. A Heart is found. A person is no more," Bookman explained, re-folding the piece of paper and placing it in his pocket alongside the two pieces of Innocence that they had collected.

"Yet another riddle..." Lenalee murmured softly, looking at the floor with a frown. "What could it mean?"

"We'll have to wait and see," Lavi answered. "Leave it to me and Gramps; we'll figure it out!"

"Do not be so cocky, brat. For now, we must return to the Order and give them the Innocence that we have found."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

When they returned to the Order later on that day, it was obvious that something bad had happened. There was debris everywhere, as well as destroyed equipment and papers strewn all over the floor. Lenalee set off running instantly for her brother's office, the rest of the group following. When they eventually reached it, the saw that Komui was lying draped over his desk, comatose. Lenalee froze.

"_Ge-ge_?"

Running forwards, Lenalee shook her brother's shoulder, starting to panic. When the man gave a sleepy snore, everyone gave a sigh of utter relief. Then, they heard footsteps; it was Reever and Jiji.

"Ahh, you've returned!" Reever cried happily, smiling at them all. Jiji smiled also.

"W-what happened here, Reever? It looks like a bomb's gone off or something..." Lavi said, looking around increduously. Reever's face darkened.

"It's all the Chief's fault! When he heard that there had been some wrong information in your brief for India, he set off a new Komlin that he'd been hiding and tried to attack all the Finders who had been he'd been hiding and tried to attack all the Finders who had been assigned to your mission," Jiji explained, looking dejected. "He destroyed most of this floor..."

"Oh. Well. At least it was just Komui acting like his usual self..." Krory murmured. Lavi and Timothy nodded in agreement. Lenalee gave her brother a hard kick to the face.

"GGGAAAAHHHH! W-what the... Ah! My sweet Lenale-EEEUUURFHGH!"

Lenalee kicked her brother again.

"You stupid stupid stupid idiot! I was so worried that the Order had been attacked by Akuma!" Kick. "And it was just you being - " Kick. "a stupid - " Kick. "idiotic - " Kick. "overprotective bastard!"

"A-and I l-love you too, s-sweet s-sister," Komui wheezed, now lying on the floor of his office with several large red marks on his face.

Then, as Lenalee continued her tirade of kicking and shouting, a Finder came running into the office and skidded on the paper strewn floor sliding into a bookcase. Everyone fell silent.

"What's the matter, Johnathon?" Reever asked, helping the man up. The Finder panted for breath.

"Came... to tell... Chief... Komui... that Allen... Walker... has returned to.. the Order."

Lenalee and Lavi forgot how to breathe.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_1 week later..._

Kanda hated Christmas.

In fact, hate just wasn't a strong enough word to describe how he felt. Maybe loathing? Despising? Detesting? Yes, that was better. Kanda _detested _Christmas. All its frivolity and merry making and goodwill towards men. Not to mention the carol singing, pointless present giving, feasting on foods other than soba. Oh, and it was Allen's birthday on Christmas Day too. Even more reason, in his mind, to detest it.

So, while the rest of the Black Order were running around like lunatics giving people presents and kissing under the mistletoe, Kanda sat in the gloomiest, darkest, most miserable room that he could find all alone. He sighed contentedly.

"Perfect..."

Meanwhile, amongst the cheerful Christmas-loving people of the Order, Lenalee was running around in a Santa hat, looking about as if she was searching for something or someone. Screeching to a halt inside the Canteen, she noticed that Krory and Timothy were happily stuffing their faces, both wearing tinsel around their necks. She ran up to them.

"Have you seen Kanda?" she asked, adjusting the bandage around her neck. Both of them shook their heads.

"Sorry, Pigtails. Haven't seen 'im," Timothy said, taking a few drumsticks from a nearby plate. "How's that Allen kid?"

Lenalee beamed. "He's healing up okay. Right now he's trying to get Lavi to go down and join in with the festivities opposed to keeping him company. That's why I've been sent looking for Kanda."

"It's nice to hear that Allen is okay," Krory mumbled through a mouthful of food. Lenalee nodded.

"Anyway, gotta go! Can't let Kanda escape Christmas this year. Bye!"

With a wave, Lenalee ran off to find the grumpy Japanese Exorcist hiding himself away like Scrooge, humming as she went. Just as she passed into the Science Department, she noticed someone she recognised dithering in the middle of an archway. Taking a few steps forward, she smothered a laugh when she saw that said person was standing under some mistletoe with a girl from the Asia Branch. The girl looked less than happy.

"I-I'm te-terribly s-sorry, miss!" Johnny stammered, blushing and adjusting his glasses. "I didn't k-know the mi-mistletoe was there! Honest!"

"B-but my first kiss has to be with Mr. Walker!" Lou Fa cried, looking up at the mistletoe then at Johnny with annoyance. "I don't even know you!"

"W-well, since th-that's the case, h-how about we g-g-get to know each other so-sometime?"

Lenalee raised her eyebrows. Lou Fa seemed just as surprised. After a while, the girl adjusted her glasses and gave Johnny a quick peck on the lips. Then, as if nothing had just happened at all, Lou Fa turned around and walked away. Just before she reached the end of the corridor, she turned around and gave Johnny a timid smile.

"Lou Fa, Asia Branch Science Department."

Johnny blinked, his cheeks red, then smiled back. "Johnny Gill, European Branch Science Department."

And with that Lou Fa left, leaving Johnny standing in the middle of the corridor grinning like an idiot. Lenalee rolled her eyes with a smile, then quietly made her way towards the storage rooms where the elusive Kanda could be hiding.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Merry Christmas!"

Tyki winced as two sets of toy trumpets blared in his ears.

"Can't you see I'm busy? Go and bother Wisely or something..." the curly haired Noah grumbled, turning the page of the book he'd been reading. Jasdero and Devit pouted.

"Aw come on, Tyki! Lighten up will ya!"

"It's Christmas, hee!"

"And? Annoy someone else!"

Devit crossed his arms sulkily. "Fine, jerk. We'll go find Road and get some sweets instead."

"Yeay sweets, hee!"

The two twins bounced out of Tyki's room like children on a sugar rush (which they probably were), leaving the Noah of Pleasure alone to read his novel. After a little searching, and annoying Wisely in the process by stealing his bandana, Devit and Jasdero found Road sitting on the balcony rails outside her bedroom, looking out towards the town with a depressed expression, a small party hat crushed in her left hand. The twins looked at each other then back at Road, confused.

"Hey, Road!"

"What's the matter? We thought you liked Christmas, hee!"

The young-looking Noah turned towards them with a sad smile. "Merry Christmas, Jasdevi." Road said hollowly, handing them both candy canes. Though Jasdero took the sweet and stuffed it in his mouth without question, Devit simply held the candy cane in his hand and looked her in the eyes seriously.

"Why're ya so depressed, Road?" he asked, walking forwards and leaning against the balcony railings. Road sighed.

"I had... a dream..."

"Well, you are the Noah of Dreams, you idiot."

Road flicked Devit on the nose, pouting. "I meant a different sort of dream, fool. One in which the future can be deciphered."

"Ohh... What's gonna happen then? Something bad?" Devit asked, eating a piece of his candy cane thoughtfully.

For a while the blue haired girl was silent, her expression thoughtful as she stared out towards the snow covered houses below her. Then, eventually, she gave a small smile and turned towards Devit.

"I'm going to lose someone important to the Heart."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Allen sighed. It was just his luck to be bedridden on both Christmas Day and his birthday. Though Lavi had been keeping him company for most of the morning, or annoying him whichever way you looked at it, the red head had left the infirmery about an hour ago to do some 'special business' and Allen was becoming increasingly bored.

"Probably finding girls to kiss under the mistletoe," he grumbled, rolling over and wincing from his bruised ribs. About a week ago he'd managed to return to the Order, beaten up and bleeding profusely. It had taken far too long to defeat all the Akuma from Khajuraho and he pushed himself too far in the Ark, earning himself a great deal of wounds and pain in the process. So, when he did manage to open an Ark gate to the Order, he promptly collapsed and ended up stuck in the infirmery with little company due to Matron. After 4 days in which Matron had to deal with Allen's growling stomach whilst he was unconscious, several incidents involving Lavi trying to sneak into the infirmery, many teary pleas from Lenalee to be allowed in and Allen trying to sneak out of the infirmery countless times after he woke up, Matron eventually allowed visitors in to see the white haired teen.

Lenalee upon seeing him gave Allen a very emotional lecture about being selfish and putting himself in harms way, which ended with Link walking in on the two of them hugging (or rather Lenalee throwing herself tearfully at Allen, who comforted her awkwardly) and sending the sniffling girl away. Then Allen received _another _lecture from Link about the same sort of thing, minus the tears and hugging of course. And then Cross came to visit him, if it could be called visiting - the red haired General came in and told him he was stupid, smoked a cigarette, hit Allen round the face, and left. And _then_, to top it all off, Lavi kept visiting him to 'keep him company' (though Allen was grateful for the food Lavi brought for him from the Canteen).

All in all it had been a very hectic week.

Sighing and looking out the nearby window at the overcast English sky, Allen thought back on the past two missions. Would they find the Heart soon? He hoped so - the war wasn't getting any easier for the Order and it would only be a matter of time before the Earl succeeded in wiping humans off the face of the Earth. Just as Allen began to feel slightly depressed, the door to the infirmery opened. Standing in the doorway, grinning like an idiot with his hands behind his back, stood Lavi. And behind him was a trolley piled high with Christmas food. Allen's face lit up.

"Happy birthday, 'sprout!" Lavi said cheerfully, wheeling the trolley into the room with a foot whilst still keeping his hands hidden behind him. Allen raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not a beansprout. And what are you hiding behind you?" the white haired teen questioned curiously, noticing how Lavi looked a little bit nervous all of a sudden. Refusing to look him in the eye whilst giving an embarrassed chuckle, Lavi handed Allen a present neatly wrapped in silver paper.

"Is this... for me?" Allen asked, surprised. He looked up at Lavi with a smile.

"No, I'm giving you someone else's present to open," the red head grumbled sarcastically, pouting. "Just open it."

Peeling off the selotape carefully and unfolding the paper, Allen laughed when he saw a beansprout wrapped up with a ribbon on top of a small black box. Elbowing Lavi in the stomach good naturedly, Allen put the vegetable to one side and eyed the box with a mixture of amusement and slight concern.

"If there's a ring in this, I'll make you eat it," the white haired Exorcist said with a laugh, picking the box up and rattling it slightly. It was heavy. When Allen opened up the box, his eyes widened. Lifting the silver compass up, he found himself speechless, even more so when he saw his name engraved on the back.

"You're always getting lost so I thought it might come in handy," Lavi murmured, blushing a little. "If you don't like it, it's fi-"

"It's beautiful," Allen interrupted, turning towards Lavi with a bright happy smile. The red head grinned in reply, looking somewhat relieved. "Thank you, Lavi..."

For a while the both of them were silent, Allen admiring his present with a huge smile and Lavi trying not to seem too happy that his friend liked the compass, sounds of merriment echoing faintly from the nearby canteen. Eventually, Allen placed the compass back in its box, put it on the bedside table and grabbed a plateful of food from the trolley. Lavi laughed.

"By the way, where's Lenalee?" Allen asked with a mouthful of food, demolishing his plate within seconds and grabbing another one.

"She's gone looking for Yuu," Lavi answered, taking his own plate from the trolley and sitting down on the end of Allen's bed.

"Why?" Allen whined.

"We can't let him escape Christmas again! He's too anti-social for his own good," Lavi replied, kicking Allen lightly with a foot and receiving a face full of cranberry sauce in reply. Thus, the food fight began.

Matron was going to kill them both.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Lenalee was pissed off.

It was nearly 3pm and she _still _hadn't found Kanda. She had searched most of the Order by this point and seen far too many people under the mistletoe (though seeing Reever trapped under some with Bonnaire was hilarious) and the temptation to just leave the grumpy Exorcist on his own and join in with the festivities with the others was getting pretty strong by the time Lenalee was passing through the lower levels of the archives.

"Where the hell are you, _sǐ pì yǎn_ ?" she grumbled, peeking into a room to her left and finding nothing except piles of smelly blankets. Sighing, Lenalee closed the door to the room before her and carried on down the hallway. Why was she making so much effort for Kanda anyway? She found herself unable to come up with a reason; she just didn't want him to spend Christmas alone. Lenalee remembered bitterly the lonely Christmases of her childhood before Komui joined the Order; tied to a bed, only able to listen to the people outside enjoying themselves, confined to a dark room with no-one to be with. She couldn't let her friend have no-one like she did.

After going past 5 more rooms and seeing no-one, Lenalee stopped in the middle of the hallway and sighed. At this rate she wasn't going to have any fun on Christmas.

"Maybe he'll turn up upstairs eventually..."

Just as Lenalee started to turn around to go back, she froze when she saw the faint flicker of candle light coming from a slightly adjar door at the end of the hallway. Silently, she walked up to the door and pushed it open. Sitting cross legged on the cold stone floor was Kanda, eyes closed. He was meditating. Lenalee pouted and put her hands on her hips. Before she could say anything, however, Kanda opened his eyes and huffed.

"If you're trying to get me to come upstairs and join in with the idiotic celebrations, you're going to be disappointed," he murmured. Lenalee scowled.

"Christmas is a time for people to be together! And you're down here instead, sulking," Lenalee said scoldingly. "We might not get a chance like this again..."

Kanda blinked. Lenalee looked sad now instead of angry, and even seemed on the verge of bursting into tears. Feeling slightly guilty, he looked down at his hands and sighed.

"I'll come up later."

Lenalee looked up, surprised. Kanda's eyebrow twitched. With a smile Lenalee gave him a nod and walked towards the door. Then she stopped. Chuckling, she turned back around and sat down next to Kanda, noticing his somewhat confused expression out of the corner of her eye. Lenalee faced him with a smirk.

"Knowing you, you'll come up and then slink off again five minutes later. So I think I'll stay here and meditate with you to make sure you actually do join in."

"You're impossible, you know that?" Kanda grumbled, closing his eyes. Lenalee laughed.

"But so are you."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

Jerry sank to his knees, tears streaming down his cheeks. Komui patted the cook on the back comfortingly.

"It's okay, Jerry! There's time to make another cake, right?"

Jerry gave Komui a despairing look, holding up the burnt cake with a sniff. "But it was going to be perfect! And we've run out of mitarashi dango..."

"It doesn't have to be mitarashi dango flavoured, does it? How about mango? Mango's good," Komui said cheerfully. Jerry ignored him. Sighing, the Chief of the European Branch of the Black Order sat down on a nearby chair and poked what was supposed to have been Allen's birthday cake gloomily. He and Jerry had spent most of the morning baking the cake to mark the 16th birthday of the white haired teen; whisking eggs, mixing dango in with the cake mixture, making icing to go on top of the cake, licking the bowl of mixture clean (well, Komui did when Jerry wasn't looking). It had been such fun. Until they got distracted by Reever choking on a roast potato and the cake burned. Could they get away with buying one from town for Allen?

Then, with a crash, the door to the kitchen opened. Lavi, covered head to toe in a variety of foods, ran inside and hid behind Komui fearfully, shaking.

"What's wrong?" Komui asked, turning around and patting the red head on the shoulder, regretting it instantly as his hand came away covered in gravy and bits of sprout. He wiped his hand on Jerry's apron.

"She's gone insane! _Insane_!" Lavi whispered, freezing as the sound of running footsteps approached the kitchen. Fearing for his life, the future Bookman cringed as the door flew open, waiting to be dragged by the ear and murdered cruelly with bleach and scalpels by the lividly furious Matron. When nothing happened, he looked up tentatively. Standing in front of them was Lou Fa, carrying a large box in her arms, tinsel wrapped loosely around her neck. She smiled.

"I heard from Jiji that Mr. Walker's cake got ruined and that you needed some dango?"

Taking the box from her, Jerry's face lit up as he saw the large amount of mitarashi dango inside it.

"Now we can re-make Allen's cake!" Komui cried happily, jumping up. He patted Lou Fa on the head cheerfully. "Thank you!"

"It's nothing," Lou Fa murmured, blushing slightly. Lavi sighed with relief. Deciding to go shower, the red headed Exorcist left Jerry and Komui to make Allen's birthday cake, smiling. He got as far as the end of the hall before a sharp tug on the ear sent him crashing to the ground. Matron chuckled darkly.

"Thought you could escape, hmm? You're not going anywhere until you clean the infirmery."

"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

A flurry of snowflakes fell on the town of Bergen, the land becoming whiter and whiter as the minutes passed, the rooftops of the buildings within the town soon becoming laden with snow. It was typical weather for the winter there; this particular region of Norway always got a lot of snow storms towards the end of the year.

Pulling his coat around himself tighter, a bespectacled man trudged down a deserted road, his cheeks flushed pink from the cold. Though he was wearing thick leather boots, he could feel his feet turning numb. Spotting a monastery nearby, the man walked quickly towards it, stamping his feet on the doorstep as he rung the bell outside the door, ridding his boots of snow. After about a minute or so the heavy wooden door swung open, an elderly man wearing black robes holding a candle standing before him. The old man smiled.

"Looking for shelter, sir?" he asked.

"If it wouldn't be too much trouble," the man answered, nodding. The old man moved aside and let him in, closing the door behind him. Leading the man through a dark and chilly corridor, the two men eventually reached a small but comfortable dining room.

"My name is Lukas. If you'd like, I could get my wife to cook you some soup; you look frozen to the bone!" the old man said with a laugh, setting the candle down on a small round table nearby. The bespectacled man smiled.

"That would be lovely, thank you," he replied, shrugging off his damp coat and draping it over a chair next to him. "Though I do not have a name, you can call me the Cardinal. Nice to meet you."

The Cardinal grinned.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- ge-ge = big brother (mandarin)

- sǐ pì yǎn = stupid asshole (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**That's the end of chapter 2! Thanks for reading and please drop me a review – they really do inspire and motivate me to write more ^^ And my apologies if my French is wrong – please correct me if I've made a mistake!**

**xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 31/05/12**


	3. Chapter 3: Goodbye 1886

**Hey there y'all. I'm sorry this is so late! School is slowly killing me *headdesk* I swear if I ever have to see any form of hydrocarbon again I will shoot myself! Chemistry AS sucks *pouts* Anyway, thank you to OceanicCrownClown, Stavarn100, ThorongilAnime, The Final Horseman, kh07gl, crazedyaoifangirl, sera-the-otaku, Midnight Kaito, Aegiskitty, BeArOcKpRINxEsS and an unnamed person for reviewing and to those who have subscribed and/or favourited. Here's chapter 3, enjoy!**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Dear ghost, in the past did you ever find_

_The thought 'What profit?' move me much?_

_Yet abides the fact, indeed, the same -_

_You are past love, praise, indifference, blame._

Thomas Hardy; Your Last Drive

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 3 - Goodbye 1886

It was nearing the end of the year. After a rather hectic Christmas with much merriment and drinking, the Black Order prepared for the New Year's Day celebrations coming up in only 3 days time. However, the start of the next year was important for another reason too - it was Miranda's birthday. Though she preferred not to have a big celebration on her birthday since it was on the 1st of January, a certain someone was determined to make her birthday special.

"So, will you come with me Kanda?"

The black haired teen scowled and finished eating his soba with a huff.

"Why do you need my help choosing a present for her? Bring Lenalee with you instead," Kanda grumbled. Marie sighed.

"She's busy keeping an eye on the Chief though."

"He's only got a hangover."

"She won't come anyway. You know how worried she gets over the smallest things."

"Yes, I know..."

"And we often don't have days off at the same time..."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"And you'll only get dragged into something with Lavi if you hang around..."

"That _baka usagi_ couldn't drag me into anything!"

"And we can go to the nice Japanese restaurant that has the soba buffet for lunch..."

Silence. Then, after a while...

"Oh fine, _bakame_ , have it your way! I'll come," Kanda snapped, standing up and placing his tray on the washing-up trolley moodily. Marie smiled, hiding his smugness expertly.

"Thank you. I hope I can get Miranda something nice..." the blind man murmured, frowning slightly. Would she like jewellery? Or food perhaps? She was such a random person; how on Earth was Marie supposed to think up a gift idea for her?

He had lost faith in himself already, and he hadn't even started shopping yet.

After a few minutes of trying to avoid Link (who was frantically looking for Allen) and avoiding a murderous-looking Cross (who had the hangover of the century) Kanda and Marie managed to get out of the Order and reach the busy bustling streets of Central London. It didn't take long for the pair of Exorcists to find a small café near a park where they sat down with some hot drinks, enjoying not having any work or fighting to do. Kanda even seemed somewhat relaxed as he sipped at his green tea, gazing out the window at the barren leafless trees outside. Marie placed his now empty cup of coffee on the table and sighed contentedly.

"If only everyday could be as peaceful as this," Marie murmured. Kanda hummed in agreement into his nearly empty cup. After a few moments of silence, Marie interlaced his fingers and rested them upon the table, smiling. "So... how are things between you and Lenalee?"

"Wh-what's that supposed to mean?" Kanda demanded, swallowing the last of his tea with a little difficulty as he tried not to choke on it. His blind teammate wasn't one for asking such... direct... questions. Marie carried on smiling.

"I was just curious - you seem to be spending a lot of time with her lately," he said, looking out the window.

"And you spend a lot of time with Miranda, yet you don't see me implying anything," Kanda grumbled, scowling.

"Touché," Marie replied, shaking his head slightly and chuckling.

After more amiable silence, the two of them left the café and started to wander around, gazing into windows for a birthday gift for Miranda. Deciding against clothes, because Marie being blind and Kanda not giving a shit could only breed disaster, they settled on finding a necklace of some sort - a reasonably easy thing to find, though money could become a problem.

"I bet this isn't even made of real gold," Kanda murmured with a scowl, hanging the apparently 14 carot gold locket back on its pedestal.

"I'm sorry - I did not realise how difficult this would be without sight..." Marie said quietly, turning towards Kanda as they reached a display of rings. "I was so concerned about what to get Miranda I did not consider how much you'd have to do, which was stupid."

"It's fine," Kanda managed to mutter through gritted teeth. The whole 'buying-a-gift' thing _was_ grating on his nerves, but he owed Marie a lot and he had nothing better to do that day anyway. "Don't expect me to pay anything though."

Marie replied with a chuckle. After a few more minutes of looking idly at some 'pure silver' lockets, the two of them decided to head further into the inner city; though it'd be more expensive, at least the necklace wouldn't break within two days. And the lower class money hungry jewellers would stop staring at their pockets.

Eventually Marie and Kanda reached Oxford Street, people hurriedly heading from place to place trying to keep out of the cold, a few snowflakes falling slowly to the ground with silent grace as they entered the last jeweller on the street. As soon as they stepped inside, the door closing with a slight creak behind them, an elderly man with a stooped back came to greet them.

"Welcome, my good sirs! How may I be of assistance?" he croaked, placing a hand on Kanda's shoulder and having it shrugged promptly off. The Japanese Exorcist scowled.

"We need to find a necklace for someone's birthday," Marie murmured, carefully figuring out the layout of the room so he knew his whereabouts. The old man smiled.

"I have just the thing for you, sir!"

Wincing a little, the shop keeper walked up to a large casket on the other side of the room, bent down and unlocked a cupboard at his feet, reaching in and pulling out a large black box about the size of the average suitcase. Placing it carefully on a table in front of Kanda and Marie, the old man opened up the box to reveal a variety of necklaces and lockets, the weak winter sun reflecting off of what was undoubtedly real silver and gold.

"May I ask what hair colour your... acquaintance... has?"

"Dark brown."

"Hmm... may I recommend this one to you fine gentlemen?"

The man lifted up a delicate silver necklace, a small butterfly dangling down with small amethysts and rubies decorating its wings, the stones reflecting the light beautifully. Though Kanda hated to admit it, the necklace would suit Miranda and she liked butterflies too. He glared at the piece of jewellery, as if it was its fault that he was even looking at necklaces in the first place. Kanda sighed.

"Buy it," he said, crossing his arms and looking out the window moodily. Marie smiled and nodded.

"How much is it?"

"£450, but I'll sell it to you for £320 since it's a gift for a lady's birthday," the shop keeper replied with a laugh. Though he was grumbling internally about the ridiculous price, Marie paid the man and tucked the now boxed necklace in his coat pocket. Giving the elderly jeweller a nod, the blind Exorcist left the shop. Just as Kanda was about to follow him, he felt a hand press down on his shoulder. He stiffened as he felt breath against the back of his neck.

"You're very close to the end now. Don't screw up, or your precious Heart will be lost."

With a sadistic chuckle, the Level 2 kicked away the remains of the 'jeweller' and pulled the trigger of the large gun aimed at Kanda's head.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Checkmate."

Allen smirked as Johnny realised he had lost, the scientist slumping in his chair gloomily.

"Hey you two!"

Looking up from the chess board in front of them, Allen and Johnny both smiled as Lenalee approached them, her arms ladened with files. She placed them on the floor with a sigh.

"How's the Chief?" Johnny asked Lenalee, setting the chess board up for a new game.

"Extremely whiny and frustrating beyond belief," she grumbled.

"So, no different from normal then?" Allen asked with a smile. Lenalee hit him playfully on the arm in reply, trying not to laugh.

Just as Johnny and Allen were about to play another game, Johnny using white and Allen using black, Jiji tapped the young scientist on the shoulder, looking exhausted.

"You're needed back in the lab," he mumbled, yawning. Johnny groaned. Standing up and sighing, he gave Allen and Lenalee an apologetic wave before following Jiji back to what would undoubtedly be extremely hard and tiring work.

"I feel sorry for the Science Department sometimes..." Lenalee murmured, helping Allen pack up the chess set into a small leather suitcase. "They work so hard and get little credit for what they do."

"Yeah... Though they probably feel the same towards us too," Allen answered quietly. Lenalee replied with silence. After a while, the raven haired Exorcist noticed a chain poking out of Allen's trouser pocket; light from the chandeliers above them glittered on the linked silver rings. Lenalee smiled.

"So, you like Lavi's present then?" she asked, trying not to giggle at Allen's slightly bashful expression.

"Y-yes, it was very thoughtful of him," he replied, tucking the chain deep into his pocket with an awkward smile. "At least it means it'll be harder for me to get lost now!"

"Mmm..." Lenalee hummed thoughtfully, narrowing her eyes. "It must have been pretty expensive though," she added.

"W-well perhaps b-but it's not particularly important, is it," came the embarrassed reply. Lenalee laughed. Standing up, she picked up the files at her feet and gave Allen a smile.

"Perhaps. I know one thing for sure though - I'd only do that for someone who meant the world to me."

And with that she left the white haired Exorcist alone, humming as she went, missing the small smile adorning Allen's lips.

For a while he sat in silence, lost in his thoughts. Did he really mean that much to Lavi? The red head had never really acted any different towards him than he usually did, though the compass did imply otherwise. Or did it? Lenalee liked to tease them both; could she just be messing with Allen for entertainment's sake, to create awkwardness between them? Even as he thought it though, Allen disagreed with himself.

"She wouldn't do that," he murmured quietly, slumping in his chair and idly fiddling with the hem of the suitcase in front of him. Lenalee _did _like to tease, but not to the point where it could potentially harm any bonds between people. There had to be a reason why she was implying such things about Lavi.

Standing up, Allen picked up Johnny's suitcase, being careful not to jostle the chess pieces too much, and decided to go look for the future Bookman. He'd tell him if he asked what he meant to him… or would he? Suddenly, a loud voice from across the other side of the cafeteria made him wince. He was in trouble now…

"Where do you think _you're _going?"

Allen turned around sharply, grimacing as he saw Link hurry towards him through the cafeteria with a face like thunder. He looked down at the ground as the blonde CROW reached him.

"I've been looking for you for _hours_! You can't just disappear off like some brigand whenever you feel like it! I could report you to Central for being suspicious," Link snapped, placing his hands on his hips and feeling satisfied as Allen's head drooped.

"Sorry…" the white haired boy mumbled quietly, looking dejected. Link suddenly felt a bit guilty. But only a bit.

"Well… fine. Chief Komui needs to see you anyway – he's got the results back about your eye," the CROW said, taking the suitcase off of Allen and walking away, leaving the teen alone. Allen sighed. He'd just have to talk to Lavi later.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Kanda backflipped, skidding on the frosty concrete floor, his sword poised for another attack. After the Level Two had tried to attack him (and been promptly destroyed by Marie quicker than it could say the words 'dark matter') a few more Akuma had joined in on the fray; a couple of Level Ones and a Level Two. Easy pickings. However, Marie was nowhere to be seen, having been flung beyond Kanda's line of vision by a Level Two.

And things had just got that much harder.

"What's wrong Ex-or-cist?"

Kanda gritted his teeth, gripping Mugen tighter. The Level Four before him giggled.

"Are you scared of me, Ex-or-cist?" it asked, cocking its head and giving him a sly grin. Kanda smirked.

"The one who should be scared is you, _dokumabito _!"

Kanda sprung forward, raising his sword and slicing downwards quicker than the eye could see. The Level Four dodged the blow like it was nothing, sidestepping to the right, raising its hands and building up dark matter. Kanda smirked.

"Idiot."

Long tendrils burst up from underneath the Akuma, wrapping around it and squeezing so hard the monster's eyes were bulging. Stepping up to the Akuma carefully, Marie brushed off pieces of rock from his coat, expression calm and collected. He gave Kanda an affirmative nod, who nodded in return; he was glad that Marie had finally dealt with his opponent, for Level Four's were a handful.

"Double Illusion Sword: Eight Flower Mantis!"

Eight lightning-fast slashes. Eight flashes of light. Eight Lotus petals bloomed. With a sharp piercing cry the Akuma screamed, trapped within Marie's Innocence, writhing in agony. With a flick of his sword the light dissipated and Kanda stepped forward, aiming Mugen at the Level Four's throat.

"What's wrong... Ex-or-cist? Can't finish... what you started?" the Akuma spat, leaning its head closer and grinning. Kanda chuckled.

"Second Release: Aria of Grief!"

With a loud clap light illuminated Marie's Innocence, a mournful hymn suddenly playing out of nowhere, its pitch increasing minute by minute. The Level Four was in agony. With loud screams the Akuma tried to break free, the strings of Noel Organon burning into its white armour-like shell, the music getting louder and louder the more it struggled. Kanda and Marie watched silently.

"Y... you can't... k-kill... me!" it screeched, blood dripping from its mouth onto the scorched concrete beneath them. "H-haven't... com... pleted... mission..."

"What mission? The Earl's desire to destroy humanity? Pathetic," Kanda spat, pressing his sword into the Akuma's neck. It made a choked sound then laughed. But it's laughter was unnerving; it wasn't the kind of laugh one gave before being killed. It was the laugh you gave when someone had just gotten something very very wrong, or made the funniest mistake you'd ever seen. Marie frowned.

"What is so amusing, Akuma?" he asked, stopping the song with a small flick of his fingers. The Level Four grinned.

"My mission... to hurt... those clo... se... to... Heart..."

Kanda and Marie froze.

"How do you know who the Heart is?" Kanda demanded instantly, pressing Mugen harder into the Akuma's throat.

"E... eas... y... peasy..." it choked, smirking. "J... just h... have to... see... boots..."

With a sharp twist Kanda shoved his Innocence through the Level Four's head, blood pouring onto his hands and the cracked concrete beneath their feet. The Akuma spasmed, eyes wide, a soundless scream coming from its ruby spattered lips. Pain. Numbness. Death. Blissful nothingness. With a sigh, the Akuma's soul passed on. Marie deactivated his Innocence. Kanda said nothing.

Without a word the Japanese Exorcist headed down the virtually destroyed concrete path, wiping the now dead Akuma's blood on his jacket, expression unreadable. Marie hurried after him, frowning.

"Kanda? Where are you... ?"

"We need to tell Komui about this."

"But... there is no proof behind the Akuma's words. We should not panic if there is nothing to..."

"I don't give a flying fuck!"

Marie froze. Kanda gritted his teeth, hands curling into fists. Then, almost regretfully, the long haired swordsman walked off, leaving Marie alone in the wrecked street. And all he could think of as he hurried back to the Order was of Christmas Day, where for the first time he didn't spend it alone but with someone important. A 'nakama'...

"... There isn't much time left..."

"You're right, Exorcist."

Kanda turned around sharply. Standing right behind him was a Level Three, floating above the ground, head tilted to one side. Kanda cursed and drew his anti-Akuma weapon. Then he frowned; something about the Akuma wasn't quite right. The Level Three laughed.

"Are you sure about that? You'll regret it," it chuckled, spreading its arms wide. Kanda gritted his teeth. As he leapt forward, raising his sword high above his head, Kanda suddenly noticed a black lump lying a couple of metres away. Instead of attacking, he gripped the Level Three's head and used it to fling himself gracefully behind the Akuma. What was with this feeling? He felt awful, like there was a lump in his throat and he could scarcely breathe. He ran to the black object, gripping Mugen tightly. Then he stopped dead.

"_Chikushoume_..."

Lying on the ground, still smoking slightly, was the skin of Noise Marie, his Innocence lying in the folds of flesh in its original form. The fading sunlight glinted off of the White Rose.

"Time to play, Kanda !"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"I'm afraid that's all I can tell you."

Allen sighed, opening his left eye slowly.

"I wouldn't be too worried - the damage seems to only be temporary," Komui murmured, rolling down his sleeves. "I wouldn't rely on it too much in the next few missions, however."

"Understood."

Komui frowned at Allen's dull tone of voice, looking down at the white haired teen with pursed lips, noticing that the usual spark in hiseyes was missing. He looked exhausted; like he was running on his last dregs of hope. Realising that Komui was staring at him with such a serious expression, Allen jumped up and gave the scientist a small false smile.

"No need to worry, Komui. I'm fine," he said, picking up his jacket from the back of the chair he'd been sitting on. "I'm just a little... tired, that's all."

"You'll always have a home here, Allen."

Faltering, the teen turned around. Komui gave him a serious look. After a while, Allen smiled; a real smile.

"I know."

Just as he started to make his way out of the room, he jumped as Komui suddenly gave a loud obnoxious noise. Allen turned around, looking uneasy.

"K-Komui?"

"I just remembered!" Komui cried, waving his arms about like an idiot. "Lenalee wanted me to tell you that Lavi needed to talk to you!"

"He... he does?" Allen asked, blinking. Komui nodded, noticing how the light had suddenly returned to the boy's ashen grey eyes. Smiling, Allen murmured his thanks and left the room, missing the huge grin on the Chief's face.

Dodging people in the corridors expertly, Allen made his way to the dormitories of the Black Order - Lavi always slept on his days off, so he'd be in his room if anywhere. As he walked, he found himself feeling both excited and slightly anxious all of a sudden. What on Earth was he going to say?

Suddenly, Allen stopped dead in his tracks as a Finder carrying a mountain of files nearly crashed straight into him. They exchanged apologetic smiles and the Finder started to walk in the opposite direction. Allen gave a sigh of relief. Then, just as he was about to continue on his way, he froze as something abruptly dawned on him. What if Lenalee's implications were true?

What if Lavi liked him?

Frowning, Allen started walking again, moving at a slower pace and looking down at the floor beneath his feet. All this time he'd been worrying about how he was going to ask Lavi what he meant to him, and not what answer his friend was going to give. And as he made his way slowly towards the dormitories, Allen found himself unable to figure out what answer he even wanted to hear. He didn't know how he felt, never mind Lavi. And what about Lenalee?

At that, Allen stopped in the middle of the now empty corridor. How he felt towards Lenalee hadn't come to mind at all before. She was very important to him - in fact, she could mean everything to him. Brief flashes of memory came to the fore; when they first met, her embracing him when she was worried about his eye, fighting alongside her, meeting again in Edo, her hand cupping his cheek... If that wasn't love, he didn't know what was. So why did he feel so conflicted? If it was Lenalee whom he loved, why did the thought of being with Lavi make him feel so... happy?

"Yo, Allen!"

Turning around sharply, Allen suddenly found himself face-to-face with the source of his conflicted emotions. Lavi grinned, chuckling to himself.

"You're not lost, are you? Jeez, and I thought the compass would help you have a better sense of direction," he said, rolling his eyes. They both started to walk towards the dorms, Allen scowling and blushing slightly.

"I was not lost! I was looking for you, actually."

"Really? Then why were you just standing there in the middle of the corridor?"

"I-I was just thinking about something! You're being just as bad as Link."

"Oi, ya can't compare me to Two Spot!" Lavi said indignantly, pouting a little. "Where is he by the way?" he added, frowning.

"He thinks I'm still talking to Komui about my eye." Allen replied quietly.

At that, Lavi turned towards him as they walked, expression unreadable. Then, after a while, he faced forward again and sighed.

"So... you have nothing to do right now then?" the red head asked casually, adjusting his eye patch. Allen nodded shyly, knowing instantly where their conversation was heading. After a few moments of silence, Lavi turned towards him with a grin.

"Ne, 'sprout, have you been on the roof yet?"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Blood pattered onto the ground like raindrops, decorating the monochrome surroundings with bright ruby red splodges. The sound of pained breathless pants and sadistic chuckling echoed amongst the abandoned industrial estate, the weak winter sun giving no heat as it rose to its highest point. Looking up blearily, Kanda noticed that the sky was empty of clouds; there was only pure cerulean blue above him, like that day from so long ago. The day he lost everything.

A sharp stabbing pain from his abdomen brought him back to painful reality. The Level Three slid his spiked fingers further into Kanda's liver with a gleeful grin, enjoying the brief look of agony that filled the Exorcist's eyes before he clamped down on his emotions with an iron fist. More of Kanda's blood splattered onto the floor.

This was not a normal Akuma. Level Three couldn't hide within human skin. Akuma couldn't use Innocence. What on Earth was it?

"Painful, isn't it?" the Akuma said snidely, twisting his fingers cruelly and receiving a choked gasp from Kanda in reply. "Right now, the hepatocytes in your liver are being emptied of glycogen, increasing the water potential inside the cells. Water's leaving them bit by bit, until one by one the hepatocytes crenate and die."

"Sh... shut the... fuck up," Kanda wheezed, his lips red with blood. The Level Three laughed.

"You don't get it, do you? You're going to die. Soon, your body will be starved of glucose once I stop the glycogenesis and glycogenolysis reactions occuring around your liver, causing liver failure, oxygen starvation, organ failure, and ultimately death," it explained excitedly, licking it's lips. "That's my special gift - I can alter the blood sugar levels wherever I choose within the body."

Kanda's vision started to blur, the world spinning as he tried in vain to raise his Innocence and attack the Akuma before him. He could scarcely move his hand at all. Worse still, he couldn't use his seal to heal himself due to whatever biological crap the Level Three had spouted only seconds before. He was screwed. Royally. What the hell was he going to do?

"Don't worry. Once you're dead I'll inhabit your body like I did with your friend over there," the Akuma chuckled, gesturing towards Marie's remains with a nod of his head.

The Akuma gave a sickening laugh, noticing gleefully the look of undisguised disgust and hatred within Kanda's eyes. He leant in close to the Exorcist's face and grinned.

"I wonder... which of your friends should I fuck and kill first?"

Suddenly, a huge flash of light flung the Akuma backwards into a nearby wall, causing it to smash and crush the Level Three with bricks and mortar. Standing a couple of metres away, hair untied, stood Kanda. And cupped in his hands was a dark red liquid, his sword nowhere to be seen.

"No way in hell is that going to happen."

Kanda raised his hands and drunk the liquid without a moment's hesitation, blood lust in his eyes. And something else too; something that the Akuma couldn't quite put it's finger on.

At first, nothing. Then, with an unexpected suddenness, two stigmata appeared on Kanda's forearms as if they had been burned into his flesh, blood pouring out from the wounds profusely onto the concrete floor. After a while the blood started to harden, materialising into a long, thin katana as ruby red as the blood it seemed to be made from. Calmly, Kanda picked up his reformed Innocence, knowing that he had just made it that much harder for himself to escape from the Black Order. Yet he didn't feel angry, nor like he hadn't chosen the path he was now undertaking. He felt content, and ready to fight for the sake of someone who had never left his side, as well as for the person he still longed to see, no matter how many years had passed.

"I'm fighting of my own volition now," Kanda murmured, raising Mugen and aiming it at the Level Three before him. "You better be ready." he added, smirking.

"You think having an upgrade of your damnable Innocence can save you?" the Akuma shrieked, laughing and shaking his head with amusement. "You're a fool! I'll kill you, and kill your precious Heart!"

Quick as lightning Kanda sprung forward, slicing the Akuma from head to toe before shoving Mugen deep into its non-existant heart. The Level Three made a choking noise, eyes bulging, mouth hanging open in shock. Leaning forward, Kanda twisted the sword in his grip and smiled slightly.

"She isn't the Heart. She's... an Exorcist."

And with those words ringing in its ears, the Akuma gave an agonised shriek and faded away. Sighing, Kanda fell backwards and lay on the cold concrete floor, wincing. His wounds from earlier, though briefly numbed by pure adrenaline and Mugen no doubt for a while, were becoming increasingly painful. He had to get back to the Order.

Sitting up, Kanda gazed for a while at his Innocence, feeling somewhat at peace with himself. Then, just as he stood up and began to wonder how he was going to sheathe Mugen, his sword liquified itself and slid into the stigmata on his arms, leaving him empty-handed and seemingly weaponless. Deciding to figure out his Innocence at a later date, Kanda walked towards the remains of what had been one of his closest friends, gritting his teeth as he spotted the butterfly necklace lying next to Marie's Innocence.

"No way am I gonna cry over you, _doaho_..."

Even as he said it, though, he felt his throat constrict and his eyes tear up. Chuckling to himself despite the situation, Kanda picked up Marie's Innocence, the necklace and the remains of the blind man's uniform, standing up and allowing a few tears to fall.

"_Arigatou... ore no tomodachi..."_

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Cool, right?"

Allen had to admit it; the view was beautiful. The rays of the midday sun reflected off of the windows on the South Building, sending bright flashes of light in all directions, making the settling snow on the roofs shine like luminous moonlight. Just beyond the Order on one side, a wide expanse of forest went off into the horizon as far as the eye could see. On the other side, the urban jungle of the city of London sent dark streams of smoke into the otherwise clear blue sky from thousands of chimneys, the sound of carts and general hustle and bustle echoing faintly. Allen leant back against the clock tower wall with a content smile.

"It's... peaceful up here," he murmured, looking up towards the cloudless expanse of blue above them thoughtfully. Lavi smiled.

"It is, isn't it? I came up here a lot when you were in the infirmery, and it seemed to keep me out of Matron's hair for a little while at least," the red head said with amusement, chuckling to himself. Allen turned towards him at that, frowning a little, silently asking what he meant. Lavi refused to meet his gaze, instead choosing to stare off into the distance with a slightly troubled expression.

"I... was worried about you," he admitted after a while, looking embarrassed. "Me and Lenalee both were. The last time you had been hurt by that _wàngbāgāozi _you almost died, heck, we thought you had died! We were so certain we had lost you... So for you to have to fight alone against Tyki again..."

"Lavi, I..."

Both of them fell quiet. Then, shyly and somewhat unsure of himself, Allen placed a gloved hand over Lavi's, giving the red head a small smile.

"You don't need to worry so much," he murmured softly, patting Lavi's hand gently whilst trying to ignore the somewhat surprised expression on his friend's face. "I can handle Tyki. And... I don't want to cause either of you such pain again..."

As Allen finished speaking, his tone turning melancholy and slightly depressed, Lavi wordlessly interlaced his fingers with Allen's reassuringly, his single eye full of a soft tender emotion that Allen hadn't seen from him before. He gave the younger teen a smile.

"But you know we're here for you, right?" Lavi said, rubbing a thumb back and forth against Allen's gloved hand. "You don't need to carry the world's weight on your shoulders, Allen."

"I-I know," the teen replied, blushing a little. He felt awkward; such caring emotion from his usually oblivious and immature friend was a little weird. Yet, all the same...

Doing it before he realised he had done so, Allen leant forward and wrapped his arms around Lavi, resting his head on the redhead's shoulder. Blinking in surprise, Lavi froze for a few seconds. Then, rolling his eyes and smiling, he held Allen tightly against him.

And, as Lavi hugged him back and called him a sentimental beansprout, laughing a little, they both missed the slight rustle of fabric and the sound of running footsteps leaving the rooftop, unaware that they're private moment together had been witnessed by someone other than themselves.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- baka usagi = stupid rabbit (japanese)

- bakame = dumbass (japanese)

- dokumabito = demon piece of shit (japanese)

- chikushoume = fuck me (japanese)

- doaho = stupid (japanese)

- arigatou... ore no tomodachi = thankyou... my friend (japanese)

- wàngbāgāozi = bastard (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**I wonder who spotted Allen and Lavi, hmm? And gahh Miranda and Marie, I feel so cruel D: ... But oh well *chuckles* Sorry if this chappie's been a bit, well, crap though XD Things will be moving swiftly onwards soon enough... I hope you liked this, reviews would be much appreciated and thank you for all being supportive about my schoolwork too ~ Chapter 4 will be up as soon as possible, 'kay? Love you all!**

**xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 11/06/12**


	4. Chapter 4: Little Jigsaw Pieces

**Hey people! This chappie's a long one, so I hope you enjoy it *laughs* By the way, I'm just about starting the oneshot for Stavarn100, so look forward to that being uploaded at some point soon – it's going to be about the past selves of the Exorcists meeting in a dream, so it's gonna be all cuteness and adorableness *giggles* Thank you to Stavarn100, Geeres, OceanicCrownClown, adfgs, bakaxusagi and Anactolica for reviewing and to those who've subscribed and/or favourited. Review replies are at the end.**

**Thank you also to bakaxusagi for help with the German in this chappie, and this chapter is dedicated to bakaxusagi, Geeres (kusekkeme ;D) and Anactolica (*gives vodka*). Here's chapter 4 of [PROPHECY / SHIN], enjoy!**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_The Road goes ever on and on_

_Down from the door where it began._

_Now far ahead the Road has gone,_

_And I must follow, if I can,_

_Pursuing it with eager feet,_

_Until it joins some larger way_

_Where many paths and errands meet._

_And whither then? I cannot say._

JRR Tolkein; The Fellowship of the Ring

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 4 - Little Jigsaw Pieces

One would think that the death of one of God's chosen Apostles would be more important-seeming than this.

At least, that's what Krory thought as Lvellie led the funeral ceremony for Noise Marie. The man had no emotion in his voice whatsoever as he read from the Bible before him, narrowing his eyes and glaring at those mourning or showing any form of feeling at all for that matter. His tone was monotonous, almost bored, as he concluded the short ceremony with an 'Amen', threw a rose onto the dead Exorcist's grave, and left with his ever-faithful Link by his side. The rest of the higher-ups who had bothered to attend left as well, grumbling about the bitter weather and how Exorcists should be more careful.

All Generals except Tiedoll left next, Cross actually showing some compassion before he walked back indoors by giving Tiedoll a rose, since he had been too out-of-it to obtain one himself. All the Exorcists and main members of the Science Department stayed, the quiet punctuated only by the sobs of Lenalee, Miranda and Chaoji. The rest remained silent.

One by one people walked forward, dropping a rose onto the urn containing Marie's ashes and muttering a few words of farewell before leaving. When Komui dropped his rose, he sighed and looked down at the grave sadly.

"I'm sorry..."

There was nothing more he felt he could say. Wincing when he walked past his sister, who was sobbing her heart out whilst Allen tried to comfort her in vain, Komui left and headed back inside the Order, feeling as if the blind Exorcist's death had already added more weight to his shoulders.

_It wasn't a normal Akuma, idiot. It used his Innocence!_

Komui sighed and made his way to his office, feeling a headache coming on. Kanda's news about the "Level Three" worried Komui greatly. What new weapon had the Earl devised this time?

An Akuma that could wear a human's skin like Level Ones and Twos? An Akuma that could use its host's Innocence, if its host was an Exorcist? And Kanda becoming a Crystal Type like Lenalee? It convinced Komui all the more that the War was coming to an end, and that soon enough humanity would either triumph against the Millenium Earl or fall from grace.

It was only a matter of time.

Soon enough, Komui reached his paper strewn office, old coffee mugs and used plates lying haphazardly across the floor. Stepping over the rubbish covering the ground, Komui walked to his desk and sat down with a huff, rereading Kanda's report for the seventh time that morning.

"It just doesn't make any sense..."

The Chief of the Black Order sighed and leant back in his chair, eyes closing tiredly.

"I hope you're not about to fall asleep, Chief."

Sitting up, Komui grinned as he saw Reever walk into his office with a folder in one hand and a mug of coffee in the other.

"Section Chief Reever! You made me coffee!" Komui cried delightfully, skipping up to the blonde scientist and taking the mug from him, humming contentedly as he sipped from it. Reever scowled and hit Komui atop the head with the folder.

"I only did it because I want you to actually work, not that it ever works," Reever muttered. "I've got some data on Kanda's Innocence, though we've still got lots more to analyse from the tests."

Komui froze and stopped drinking.

"What did you discover?" he asked, placing the mug of coffee on the floor. Reever opened the folder and showed its contents to Komui.

"His Innocence is almost identical in terms of appearance, looking like the form we built for him after it was broken on the Ark," Reever explained, voice solemn. "Though it originates from his blood, with a single stigmata on each arm, Kanda can sheath his Innocence like he could prior to its evolution."

"And what about its strength?"

"It is far more powerful than before, almost of General standard."

"And does it respond to his emotions, like Lenalee's Innocence?"

"Kanda refused to tell us or prove if that was so, but from what we've gathered his Innocence probably does act more like a Parasite Type and behaves according to his feelings."

"..."

"What?"

"Kanda has feelings other than anger?"

"... Chief."

"Yes?"

"Shut up."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

Soon enough, only a few of the Exorcists remained outside by Marie's grave. For a while no-one said or did anything, simply watching the small flakes of snow fall delicately onto the pile of roses by their feet. Then, sighing as he did so, Lavi walked forwards and dropped his rose, shivering a little as a particularly cold wind blew past.

"You were too nice for your own good, ya know?" the red head murmured, shaking his head sadly. "Thanks for everything, and I hope you're finally at peace now."

With that Lavi walked away, patting Allen's shoulder comfortingly and giving both Lenalee and Miranda sympathetic looks before heading down the short gravel pathway back to the Order. The rush of warmth as he entered the building brought him some comfort, but not enough to cheer him up any. Though he hadn't known Marie as well as some of the others, during all the times he had been in the man's company he had been shown only kindness and generosity. And the death of a friend was always hard to take, even for the Bookman apprentice who had lost many comrades and friends over the years, yet was not allowed to mourn or feel anything towards them whatsover.

So was the fate for all who belonged to the Bookman Clan.

Lavi found himself thinking of Kanda as he walked, noticing that he hadn't been at the funeral. The raven haired teen had been around earlier; Lavi had seen him at breakfast in the Cafeteria. But, knowing Kanda, he'd pay his respects to his friend after everyone else had left.

Deciding to change out of his now damp uniform, Lavi headed to the dorms in the hope of getting a hot shower and trying, at least, to erase any feelings of grief or sadness before Bookman came along. He'd noticed that ever since Noah's Ark he was finding it harder and harder to be emotionless or at least be in control of his emotions. And he knew Bookman had noticed. The old man was probably going to find out about the changes between him and Allen soon enough too. Now _that _was most certainly a conversation he didn't want to have any time soon. If at all.

There had been times in the past where Lavi had considered himself in love with someone, and everytime Bookman scolded him and made his life hell until the relationship ended, or until they moved on to a new place with new personas. After a while Lavi just gave up trying to establish a relationship at all, instead opting for flirting and meaningless one-night-stands that his master couldn't stop him from having. And, even then, becoming a Bookman had always been his top priority. It was only now, with Allen, that he was seriously doubting whether he wanted to continue on his path to becoming a Bookman, for the first time in 13 years.

It was only now, with Allen, that everything felt so very different to the others before, no matter how cliché it sounded.

Something felt completely and utterly _right _about being with him and, though Lavi still found himself doubting how he felt at times, because falling for a guy was something he had not at all expected, Lavi couldn't help the fact that Allen meant a hell of a lot more to him than he had realised previously. And, now that he had the chance of being with someone without Bookman finding out instantly, no way was he letting Allen go.

Then, just as Lavi rounded the corner and reached the first set of dormitories, still lost in his thoughts, he walked straight into Lvellie, sending the older man and the cake he'd been eating flying.

"Ah. Oops. Sorry, didn't see ya there," Lavi said with just a little touch of sarcasm, crossing his arms instead of helping the man up. He still hadn't forgiven him for the way he had treated Lenalee when the previous Order was attacked. Standing up and brushing himself off, Lvellie cocked his head at the barely disguised contempt in Lavi's eyes before chuckling to himself.

"You should watch where you're going, Bookman Jr." the man said, walking past the red head with a smirk on his face. "Don't want to create anymore enemies now, do we?"

And with that, Lvellie was gone. The instant he turned the corner at the end of corridor, Lavi ran into his room and searched it so finely that even Bookman would be impressed. He found nothing.

"What the hell was he doing down here..." Lavi murmured, sitting on his bed and frowning. Lvellie had been standing right outside the door to his room; he didn't need a picture perfect memory to tell him that. But if nothing had been taken, and nothing had been put in his room either, then what had the man come in for?

Sighing and leaning against the wall behind him, Lavi sat in silence for a while, thinking over the events of the past few weeks. Things had turned so hectic now - the poems, the death of an Exorcist... And, from what Kanda described, the Noah seemed to think the Heart was Lenalee and were trying to close in on her.

But was Lenalee really the Heart? Surely, if she was, her Innocence would have revealed itself already and they'd have ended the war ages ago. That was what the Heart wanted; to let the Exorcists prevail, and for the Noah to be defeated. Or was it? The first poem they found implied that the world would end when the Heart was used.

Could they have been mistaken all this time?

"Heh, this isn't helping me cheer up at all," Lavi muttered, chuckling to himself quietly. Standing up quickly, the red head picked up a towel and spare clothes, and headed out the door towards the communal bathrooms. A nice hot shower would help ease his troubled thoughts. Hopefully…

Just as he turned to walk down the East wing corridor, only a minute or two away from the bathrooms, a hard kick to the back of his head sent him flying straight into the wall at the end of the corridor. He fell to the floor with a huff.

"Where do you think _you're _going, _bái chī_?"

Sitting up, Lavi glared in annoyance at the old man standing a metre or so away.

"To have a shower. Gotta problem, _lǎo toúzi_?" the red head grumbled, rubbing his head with a pout. Bookman picked up the clothes and towel that his apprentice dropped and threw the items at Lavi's face. When he pulled the fabric away from his visible eye, the red head cocked his head as he noticed a faint look of regret in the old man's eyes; it was so faint that probably anyone but Lavi wouldn't have noticed anything. But he had known Bookman for over 13 years, and he could easily tell that he had something important to say, and that he wasn't going to like it. Not one bit.

"What's going on?" Lavi asked, standing up and giving Bookman a serious look. The man said nothing for a while, then turned around and murmured something too quiet for the red head to hear.

"You're gonna have to speak up, Gramps. I can't he-"

"We need to go to Bookman Clan Headquarters."

Lavi's world dropped from underneath him.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The silence was deafening.

Miranda could practically feel the air around her as if it was some tangible being, trying to suffocate her and leave her without oxygen to breathe.

To be honest, she didn't really care.

In all her 26 years upon the Earth, she had never felt pain like this. It felt nothing like a physical wound; she could deal with those easily enough. No, this pain felt as if her very soul had been ripped in two, or as if someone had taken all that she believed in and crushed it into dust before her very eyes.

Miranda remembered being told once, in the deep recesses of her memory, that love was as fleeting as a springtime blossom. While there, it would be beautiful beyond all comparison, and would fill you with joy and hope purely at the sight of it. But, no matter how hard you tried, summer would always come and the blossom would fall, dying on the soft earth whilst you stood there, unable to do anything to save it.

Hardly aware of it at all, tears slid down her cheeks onto her already damp dress, her body shaking as she tried not to sob out loud. It wasn't fair – she had hardly been able to be with Marie. To enjoy his company. To simply be with him. To be in love with him.

Miranda leant forward, her head nearly resting in her lap, her eyes wide open. Memories came back to her all at once, making her head spin; soft, tender embraces, gentle kisses, sweet nothings being whispered in each other's ears. The words 'I love you'...

"_Nein!_ _Ich will mich nicht mehr daran erinnern!_"

Then, just as she felt sorrow swallow her whole, the door to her room suddenly opened. Standing in the doorway, of all people, was Kanda.

"K-Kanda?"

The raven haired Exorcist remained silent, his expression torn and slightly annoyed. Then, after a minute or so in which Miranda hastily wiped away her tears and tried to compose herself - and failed all the same - Kanda took something out of his shirt pocket and, almost awkwardly, walked up to her and slid something over her head and around her neck. The teen then stepped back, seeming even more annoyed and just that little bit embarrassed. Looking downwards, Miranda's breath caught in her throat as she saw the delicate and beautiful butterfly necklace hanging from her neck. She gently held it in her hands, eyes wide.

"Marie bought it for your birthday," Kanda murmured, re-tying a bandage around his neck absentmindedly. "You... meant a lot to him."

Miranda knew there was no stopping the tears that slid down her cheeks, torn between feeling happy and completely heartbroken.

Kanda made for the door then stopped, eyes downcast.

"You better treasure that thing."

And with that, the teen left. For a while Miranda sat in silence, the tears continuing to fall onto her dress soundlessly. Then, with a gentle smile, the brunette kissed the butterfly in her hands and closed her eyes.

"_Danke, _Marie...".

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Sure is steamy in here, huh Tim?"

Patting the golden golem affectionately with one hand and drying his face with the other, Allen stood alone in the Order's bathroom, the hot steam from his shower causing all the mirrors in the room to fog up. Timcampy, after poking Allen in the eye with a grin, got off of the teen's head and made little patterns on the mirrors whilst Allen dressed, noticing the unrepressed shudder that flew down the Exorcist's spine as more and more of the image of the Fourteenth appeared in the mirror's reflection due to Tim's ministrations. Giving an apologetic swipe of his tail, though the golem couldn't see anything but Allen's dim reflection in the mirror, Tim flew over to the otherside of the room and rested on top of a pile of folded towels. Allen sighed.

"Things are hard enough already..."

The loss of yet another 'nakama', plus the confusion he felt towards Lavi, and the Fourteenth, were starting to greatly affect the white haired teen. It was usually so easy for Allen to reign in his emotions, to keep going in order to be strong and not let things get to him too much. But now, standing before a mirror that showed both his reflection and the daunting presence of the Fourteenth, Allen could feel his resolve cracking. All he wanted now, more than anything, was to stop. Stop, curl up into a little ball somewhere, and forget the world and everything in it.

But he couldn't do that. Not without abandoning his promise to Mana, and his comrades too.

Putting on his gloves with a tired sigh, Allen wiped away a few tears from his cheeks, sniffing. He had to be strong now. He had to keep going, no matter how difficult the road he walked, and not stop until everything was finally over.

"Come, Tim."

Almost lazily, the golden golem flew towards Allen and sat atop his head, patting the teen's head with his tail. Allen laughed. Turning off the light and closing the door behind him, he headed down the corridor towards the cafeteria. Allen could feel his stomach growling already, and drooling slightly he imagined all the glorious food he was soon going to be eating.

Suddenly, he walked straight into a Finder and the both of them fell to the ground with an 'oof'. Allen sat up and, with an apologetic smile, helped the young man up.

"Sorry about that! I should really concentrate on my surroundings better, huh," Allen said cheerfully, brushing Timcampy's tail out of his eyes. The Finder gave him a shy smile.

"I-It's okay," he murmured, looking slightly embarrassed. "Actually, I've been sent by Chief Komui to summon you to his office."

At that, Allen cocked his head. "Oh? I'll be right there. Thank you."

Giving the Finder a parting smile and wave, the white haired teen headed towards Komui's office. The Finder gave an unsuppressed shudder as Allen walked away.

"So creepy..."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Komui sighed. This was going to be a long day indeed. Standing before him, fists clenched, was Lavi, the anger in his eyes making even Komui uncomfortable. The usually controlled red head looked as if he wanted to beat Bookman up until he was black and blue.

"I don't understand why you are so angry with me, brat," Bookman spat, narrowing his eyes. "It is your duty as my apprentice to come w-"

"You said I'd never have to go back there!"

At this, the old man fell silent. There was hurt in Lavi's eyes as well as anger now.

"You promised me when we left that place that we'd never have to go back," the red head said quietly, sitting down on the couch beside him. "Why'd you lie to me?"

"I said what I had to," Bookman replied, avoiding the stares of both Lavi and Komui as he spoke. "You were only 6 years of age, and you might not have agreed to come with me if I told you that you'd have to return in 12 years time."

"Is that really the reason why? You lied to me just so I'd come with you?"

"Yes."

For a while, no-one spoke. Lavi stared at his feet with a bitter expression, fists clenched so tightly Komui wondered whether he was hurting himself in the process. Bookman simply stood in silence, face expressionless. Komui sighed.

"This is between the two of you to sort out. However, if you do decide to go, I'm afraid I have something to tell you."

At this, both members of the Bookman Clan looked up. Komui coughed, looking slightly sheepish.

"I can't let the two of you go alone," he explained quickly, noticing how both Bookman and Lavi looked suddenly rather annoyed with him. He raised his hands up before him defensively. "Both your synchro rates are pretty low, and we can't afford to lose anymore Exorcists now."

"We'll be fine," Bookman stated sharply, glaring at Komui with narrowed eyes. "We don't need tag-alongs."

"I'm afraid I can't do that, Bookman," the Chief said quietly. "You're going to need a strong fighter with you who can aid you if you come across any Akuma and Noah. Plus, if the enemy captures you and tortures any information out of you, we will be in a lot of trouble indeed. So I picked someone who will be able to return you to the Order instantly if need b-"

"No."

Komui narrowed his eyes, looking at Lavi curiously. The redhead was now standing up, an unidentifiable emotion in his single eye as it met Komui's brown ones.

"If you really have to pick someone to go with us, send someone else."

"My decision is final, Lavi. I don't know what problem you've got with him coming with you, but I will send no-one el-"

"He can't come with us!"

Komui fell into a stunned silence at Lavi's raised voice. The teen sighed, unclenching his fists and giving the man before him a pleading look.

"Please, pick someone else. I don't want him to know about wh-"

"You wanted to see me, Komui?"

Lavi froze. All three of them turned towards the door sharply, where Allen stood with a slight frown.

"What's going on? Lavi?" the teen asked, looking concerned. The red head shook his head and gave his friend a small fake smile.

"Everything's fine, Allen. You're heading out on a special mission with us!"

Bookman and Komui narrowed their eyes, both wondering the same thing. The white haired teen cocked his head slightly, but said nothing and simply nodded in reply, returning the false smile.

"Where are we going?"

"You're accompanying Bookman and Lavi to Bookman Clan Headquarters in Northern China," the man answered quietly, noticing how all of the emotion Lavi had been showing before was completely gone. "They need to do a routine check-in, as well as figuring out the meaning of the poems."

"Understood. When do we leave?"

"Right away."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Ark gate shone brightly before them, illuminating Allen's features as he stepped backwards and turned towards his companions with a small smile. Lavi returned the smile, but Bookman and Link remained stonily unresponsive. The blonde CROW demanded that he come with them, threatening Komui and Allen with telling Central about a possible act of treachery against the Order by letting Allen go 'unaccompanied'. Very reluctantly, the Chief agreed.

Wordlessly, the four of them walked through the Ark and out the other side. A soft warm sun shone down on them through the leaves of a bamboo forest, summer lingering persistently in this area of Northern China. Allen closed the gate behind them and sighed, placing a hand over his heart; they were standing exactly where Tyki had destroyed his Innocence and nearly killed him.

"This is as far north as I have been in China," the teen said quietly, noticing the flash of pain in Lavi's eyes at their location. "Do you know the way from here, Bookman?"

"I do, yes," the old man replied. Leading the way, Bookman headed in a northerly direction through the bamboo with Lavi and Allen behind him and Link bringing up the rear.

The group remained absolutely silent as they travelled, making their way slowly across the increasingly mountainous terrain towards the Headquarters of the Bookman clan, located somewhere within the foothills of the mountains separating China from the vast expanse of Russia. Unable to say anything to Lavi without Link sticking his nose in, Allen said nothing to the red head, though he very much wanted to apologise for not forewarning him about where they'd be starting out from.

However, when they reached a small area of swamp a few hours from the forest and Link had to lead the way due to his better vision, Allen took advantage of this and grabbed Lavi's hand, squeezing it and giving the red head a small, yet heartfelt, smile. Lavi blinked, confused.

"I'm sorry about earlier," Allen whispered, interlacing their fingers quickly before letting go in case Link or Bookman happened to turn around, speaking quietly enough that the two men in front of them wouldn't be able to hear them over the noisy cries of the toads and birds that lived in the swamp, but loud enough for Lavi to hear him. "I should have told you."

After a few seconds of silence, Lavi smiled and brushed the back of his hand against Allen's softly. "'S okay, 'sprout."

"I'm not a beansprout!" Allen snapped, crossing his arms and pouting. Lavi laughed.

After exiting the swamp, and laughing over Link stepping in a deep puddle of mud, the group continued to head north, the terrain slowly becoming less and less flat. It took five days for the four of them to finally reach the foothills of the mountains where Bookman HQ was situated. It was nighttime when they reached the base of the snowy peaks, the cloudless starry sky causing the temperatures to drop, and soon they were wrapping themselves up in their cloaks to retain some warmth.

"We can go no further now," Bookman said, turning towards the others. "Walking up these mountains in the day is difficult enough, and doing so at night would be a fool's errand."

"We're not sleeping outside again, are we?" Allen asked dubiously, rubbing his hands up and down his arms whilst shivering slightly. Lavi shook his head.

"There's an inn about an hour eastwards, right Gramps?" the red head asked. "We can stay there for the night and head up the mountain tomorrow. Plus," Lavi added, smirking at Allen. "The cook there does the best mitarashii dango that I've ever eaten."

To say Allen's face lit up like a child's at Christmastime would have been an understatement.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Curling up a little on the bed, Allen wrapped the blanket around himself tighter, feeling warm and comfortable. Lavi hadn't been lying about the dango – Allen happily ate 40 sticks of the stuff and felt as if he was eating heaven itself with every bite. The cook certainly appreciated his love for his food, and was more than willing to give the white haired boy serving upon serving of dango until, finally, the teen could eat no more.

He found himself worrying a little, though, as he tried to go to sleep yet found himself unable to drop off. Allen thought back on that morning in the Order, and the emotion in Lavi's single eye and the false smile that followed. It had sent alarm bells ringing within Allen's mind, and it didn't take much for the white haired teen to figure out that Lavi didn't want to go to the Headquarters of the Bookman Clan, and that he also didn't want Allen to come with him.

It also didn't take much to figure out that this was all to do with Lavi's past.

Allen knew next-to-nothing about the future Bookman's childhood apart from he started travelling with Bookman when he was only six years of age, and that he was an orphan. He understood why Lavi didn't want him to be on this mission though – if their roles were reversed, and the four of them were going to the circus where Allen had spent many years of his childhood, he would refuse point-blank for Lavi to come with him. His past was painful, and he wouldn't want his red-headed friend to know about what he went through.

"I hope it wasn't that bad for you, Lavi..."

"What?"

Allen winced and smiled sheepishly as he realised that he had spoken aloud. Link, who was lying in the bed beside his own, narrowed his eyes.

"I asked you a question, Walker."

"It's nothing, I was just thinking aloud. Sorry for disturbing you," Allen murmured apologetically, rolling over so his back was towards the blonde CROW and yawned. "Good night, Link."

"Good night..."

Silence.

The blonde man remained motionless under the covers until the white haired teen's breathing became slow and steady then, silently and with skill befitting a CROW, Link got out of bed. Making his way towards Allen's belongings, he searched through the coat pockets and then the trouser pockets, frowning as he found nothing. Then, turning back towards the Exorcist, Link walked forwards and knelt down in front of Allen's sleeping form, lifting up the covers around him slightly. He narrowed his eyes as he finally found what he was searching for.

Clasped tightly in Allen's hands was a round silver object, its outer surface reflecting the dim moonlight from outside; a compass.

Link didn't take the object from the teen. Instead, he went back to bed and untied his hair quietly before lying back with a sigh.

"So the Finder was right..."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

The next day dawned with cloudless skies and, yet again, warm temperatures and sunny weather. Yawning, Lavi sat down at the large dining room table within the inn and sipped from a cup of herbal tea. He'd slept well, though he'd been unable to drop off for some time. And no matter how much he wished he could be anywhere else, the red head felt prepared to face his demons and head into Bookman Headquarters with pride.

He was 19 years old now. He wasn't the naive and weak 6 year old that he had been when he was last there, and no way in hell was he going to let anyone try and get under his skin.

The problem was going to be Allen.

Suddenly, with a loud huff, the inn's cook sat down next to him and smiled.

"It's been a while hasn't it, _xiǎo guǐ_?" the old man asked, sipping from his own cup of tea. Lavi said nothing, looking down at the nearly empty mug in his hands. The cook sighed.

"Listen, I know you probably never wanted to be back here. I understand why too."

At this, Lavi looked up sharply, eye wide. The cook smiled sympathetically, placing his mug down on the table before them.

"I found out ages ago, shortly after you left actually, about what happened before you became the apprentice of that _lǎo bù sǐde_," the old man explained, tightening the ribbon keeping his long grey hair tied up. Lavi laughed at the man's insulting term for Bookman, remembering dimly how the cook had always hated the old man ever since he called his prized home-made rabbit stew disgusting. "But you're grown up now, and if you're really an Exorcist then this should be small fry compared to the Akuma. Now drink your tea."

For a while, the two sat in amiable silence, finishing their cups of tea and watching the morning sun rise in the sky above the mountains in the distance. The view was quite beautiful, and Lavi wished in a way that he could sit and watch the sun move over the mountains, like he did when he was younger, and not have to leave the inn. Then, turning towards the old man sitting beside him with a small smile, Lavi bowed his head respectfully and handed his mug to him.

"I'm grateful for what you've done for me."

And with that, the red-headed Exorcist left the room to get dressed. The old man smiled, shaking his head slightly.

"Didn't even ask how I've been over the years, brat..."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

It was close to ten o'clock by the time the group left the inn, mainly due to Allen's huge appetite and the fact that the cook wanted to annoy Bookman by delaying the group further with more food and cups of tea. Luckily for them, a group of people had just left Bookman Headquarters and one of the members of the group informed them that the pathways were clear enough to walk on before leaving with the rest of his group.

As they headed out, the sun continued to rise in the sky, illuminating the snowy tops of the nearby mountains. By midday they finally started to make their way up one of the mountains. It was slow going, no doubt about it. It had snowed the night before and, though they had been told that the way was clear, the snow was high enough to cause their group problems. Or rather, just for one member of their group.

Around 2 o'clock, with a yelp, Bookman sank into a heavy snow drift that he had completely missed, a small bit of hair being the only visible part of him. Lavi promptly pissed himself laughing.

"Bookman? Are you okay?" Allen asked, running to help the old man up whilst biting his lip, trying not to laugh. Said old man brushed the snow off of him with as much dignity as he could, ignoring his apprentice's hoots of laughter. Link simply stood in silence, looking increasingly annoyed. Then, taking a step forward, Bookman sank into the snow. Again. Allen couldn't help but laugh.

"Do I need to carry you, Gramps?" Lavi asked, wiping away tears of mirth. Allen was in a similar state.

"I'd rather die!" came the muffled reply.

For a while, nothing happened. Then, like a demented cross-breed of a panda and a rabbit, Bookman jumped forwards out of the hole, hopping up the mountain path with a look of complete concentration on his face. Lavi and Allen promptly started laughing again, falling against each other whilst clutching their stomachs.

"If anyone should be the stupid rabbit, it's you!" Lavi cried, getting up and running after the old man, not wanting to miss more of the hilarity his master was creating. If looks could kill, Bookman's glare would have struck the red head down with godly thunder and lightning.

"Just you-" Hop "wait brat!" Hop "Karma will hit you-" Hop "when you least expect it!"

"Oh really? And how do you-"

"Lavi, look out!"

Realising far too late, Lavi faced forwards, tripped over a small rock, whacked his head on the side of the mountain and fell face first into a pile of animal shit. And then a huge pile of snow fell on him. Snow with rocks in it.

Karma was a cruel bitch of a mistress indeed.

Allen brushed the snow off of his friend's back and helped the red head up, unable to stop himself from sniggering at Lavi's distraught expression. The future Bookman stood up with as much dignity as he could muster and used Link's cloak to wipe his face. The blonde CROW hit him in the face in retaliation.

"Oh would you hurry up!" Bookman yelled from the top of the pathway some 8 metres away from them. "We have to reach the mid-point before night falls, and I refuse to freeze to death because of some idiotic, unintelligent, scatterbrained fool."

"That's a bit harsh, Bookman," Allen said, handing Lavi his water bottle so he could wash his face a little.

"I don't care."

"Are we setting off anytime soon?" Link snapped, placing his hands on his hips and glaring at both Lavi and Allen. The two Exorcists simply grinned.

"Sure thing, Two Spot. Let's go!"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The group managed to reach the midway point just as the sun set under the horizon, darkness creeping up on them swiftly. The midway point was a simple hut situated in a little alcove in the side of the mountain; it was small, with only two rooms, and their night was bound to be spent on the floor. However, there was food and heating inside which was far more preferable to sleeping outside in the snow.

"I pick this spot!" Lavi cried, situating himself nearest the roaring fire. Allen rolled his eyes and decided to sleep beside him, missing the look Link gave him as he spread his cloak on the floor next to Lavi's. The red head turned towards him and smiled before lying down. Allen did the same.

On the other side of the room, Bookman sat and smoked from a pipe in silence. Link set his stuff down near the door, as if to make sure no-one left the hut and 'escaped', though they would have nowhere to go once outside. Then, suddenly, Bookman put down his pipe and walked over to the CROW, who was sitting and watching Allen like a hawk. Link looked up and frowned at the old man.

"What is it?"

"I need you to come with me for a moment."

At this, both Allen and Lavi sat up and looked at Bookman questioningly. Link did the same.

"Why? What is your purpose, Bookman?" the blonde man asked, scowling. "I must remain here and keep an eye on Walker."

"There are traps outside of Headquarters to ward off wild animals and intruders," Bookman explained, placing his hands in the sleeves of his coat. "You are not a member of the Bookman Clan, nor can you use Innocence, and the traps react to those that have not undergone the ritual done on members of the Clan as well as those without Innocence too."

"Then how on Earth am I supposed to come with you all then!" Link asked, standing up angrily. "Surely you should have mentioned this earlier, Bookman?"

"If you'll be quiet, you'll know how to avoid the traps," Bookman snapped. The blonde CROW fell silent, gritting his teeth. Both Lavi and Allen tried not to smirk. "There are certain incantations that I can teach you, but I cannot do so in here."

"Why not?" Link demanded.

"If Allen were to turn into a Noah, and he knew of these incantations, he could tell the other Noah and even the Earl himself, and they'd be able to enter Headquarters with no difficulty whatsoever," the old man explained. Allen winced a little at Bookman's words. "I am simply ensuring the safety of the Clan."

After a minute or two of silence in which he debated with himself internally over Bookman's words, Link sighed and stood up. "Fine. Where are we going?"

"There is a cave a quarter of a mile along the path," Bookman said, picking his cloak up from the floor. "It should be a sufficient enough place."

Nodding, Link picked up his cloak from the floor and glared vehemently at Allen and Lavi before heading outside. Bookman followed suit, giving the pair of them a warning look before leaving the hut.

Silence.

"Well... seems we're alone, huh..." Lavi murmured, leaning against the wall and adjusting his eyepatch. Allen said nothing, looking morose. Upon noticing this, Lavi rolled his eyes slightly and pulled the younger boy into a hug.

"Don't worry about what Gramps said," he murmured into Allen's hair, rubbing his back comfortingly. "He just wants to get Two Spot out of your hair for a while. He's not as uncaring as you think, ya know."

"I know..." Allen replied, wrapping his arms around the red head and hugging him back. Though he wanted him to continue and speak his mind, Lavi knew that Allen wasn't going to tell him what was on his mind. So, softly, Lavi turned and held Allen tightly against him instead.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Why does it have to be so cold-lero?"

"Oh quiet down, Lero! We're almost there."

Wrapping his coat around himself tighter, Tyki walked up the mountainside path with Lero floating beside him, blinking snow out of his eyes. He had to admit, though – he'd much rather be anywhere but on this cold mountain pathway. But he'd been sent by the Earl to tail any Exorcists that he found and, when he dimly felt the presence of the Fourteenth in the area, he knew that the fat humanity-hating man would give him trouble if he let the boy be.

After an hour or so more of walking, Tyki eventually reached a small hut tucked away in the side of the mountain. He smirked as he spotted an orange glow emanating from the abode.

"Found you, Boy!"

Wanting to have the element of surprise, the curly haired Noah walked silently through the snow and slid through the wall on the opposite side of the hut to the firelight. Once inside, he shrugged off his coat soundlessly as warmth washed over him. Looking around, Tyki noticed that he was in a tiny and slightly shabby kitchen, a small wooden table with four chairs as well as a basket full of food being the only furnishings. Then the Noah heard a noise.

Walking up to the only door in the room, which he assumed led to where Allen was, Tyki placed his ear against the door, trying to judge whether the room's occupants were asleep or not. Then he froze. Pulling away from the door, the Noah of Pleasure found himself blushing slightly, his mouth hanging open with shock.

Then, curiously almost, Tyki pressed his ear against the wooden door again, frowning and then blinking with wide eyes as he listened to the conversation occurring in the adjacent room.

"No, no, no – you're doing it all wrong!"

"I'd like to see you try this, idiot Lavi? This is hard to do!"

"It's pretty simple, beansprout. Just use your mouth until it all comes out."

"It's harder than it sounds!"

Silence. Then, after a while, a soft sigh and what sounded like the rustle of fabric.

"I-is that better?"

"Mmm... yes it is."

"S-shall I keep going?"

"You seriously need to ask that question?"

Tyki pulled away from the door, blinking several times before jumping a little as Lero appeared out of nowhere and poked him in the back, scowling. Wordlessly, Tyki grabbed the sentient umbrella and walked through the wall outside. Once there, he sighed.

"... I'm speechless..."

"What the hell's up with you-lero? The Fourteenth is in the hut, isn't he Master Noah-lero?"

"Yes. Yes he is."

"So why were you just standing there like an idiot-lero?"

"... Boy's currently... busy..."

At this, Lero whacked Tyki on the head and glared at him.

"Why the hell does that matter? Go in there, kill anyone who gets in your way, grab the Fourteenth and go-lero!"

Groaning exasperatedly, Tyki grabbed Lero tightly and walked through the wall into the hut again, shoving the umbrella's face right in front of the door. Before Lero could say anything, it froze when it heard what sounded suspiciously like someone sucking on something from the other side of the door.

And, rather abruptly, Lero understood what was going on.

Then, smirking, it pressed the side of its head to the door and continued to listen. Tyki's jaw dropped.

"What the hell are you doing?" the curly haired Noah demanded, whispering so quietly that he almost thought the umbrella didn't hear him. Then, it turned towards him and chuckled.

"Blackmail-lero." it stated simply.

Silence. Then, Tyki smirked.

"I like your thinking."

So, both leaning against the door, they continued to listen to... whatever Allen was busy doing. For a while there was only silence, then they both heard someone make a frustrated noise. Tyki recognised the voice as Lavi's, and his smirk grew wider.

"Come on Allen, hurry up!"

"S-shut up! I'm trying!" came the breathless reply.

"Ya know, if you used your hands and tongue it would all happen a hell of a lot quicker."

"Says the one who told me to 'take it slowly'!"

"J-just grip a little harder and stop talking!"

All was quiet for a while save for a few pants. Then, a surprised noise came from Allen, followed by coughing and spluttering from the white haired teen. Tyki and Lero both tried not to laugh. Lavi sighed.

"God, finally... w-wait... what did you...? Y-you idiot beansprout, it's gone everywhere! Now what're we gonna tell Two Spot and Gramps?"

"You should have-" Cough. "-told me that was going to happen-" Cough. "-jerk! I wasn't expecting it!"

"Oh... my bad..."

"Idiot Lavi..."

For a while, nothing was said. Then, Lavi chuckled.

"Shall I do the same for you, hmm?"

Suddenly, the sound of a door slamming open made Tyki and Lero jump. Lavi and Allen cried out in surprise. Then, what sounded like an old man and a youger one gasping made Tyki chuckle.

"Wh-what? What the hell is this?"

"What were you just _doing_?"

"U-umm let us explain!"

"Busted," Tyki snickered silently, shaking his head slightly.

"There's nothing to explain! It's pretty obvious what's just occurred."

"Use your cloak to clean up this water, now!"

At that, Tyki froze.

"... what?" the Noah asked incredulously, sharing a look of utter confusion with Lero.

"I'm sorry! It's all my fault – I left our water bottles too close to the door so they froze and I was j-just trying to unfreeze the tops of them..." Allen explained sheepishly.

"... Well then, clean up this mess. I expect the two of you to fetch water from the nearest spring before we head out tomorrow."

"B-but Gramps, the nearest spring is nearly 4 miles away!"

Not wanting to hear anymore, Tyki took hold of his coat and Lero and walked through the hut wall outside. Once he was a safe distance away, he put on his coat and headed down the path stormily, looking pissed off.

"I was so looking forward to teasing them both with that, stupid innocent Exorcists..."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

bái chī = idiot (mandarin chinese)

lǎo toúzi = old geezer (mandarin chinese)

Nein! Ich will mich nicht mehr daran erinnern! = No! I don't want to remember anymore! (german)

danke = thank you (german)

xiǎo guǐ = means something similar to 'little devil' or 'brat' – it's an affectionate term though :'3 (mandarin chinese)

lǎo bù sǐde = literally means 'an old man who just won't die' XD (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Ahaha that last scene was so fun to write XD I hope you're happy now, Jo *laughs* Anyways anyways, review replies:**

** adfgs - Thank you for the criticism - I didn't really know how to go about the pairing side of this fic at this stage, however I do wish to point out that there is a very important reason why Allen and Lavi still have lingering feelings for Lenalee, yet feel more strongly for each other. So, in actuality, the only person truly in love with Lenalee is Kanda, hence why Allen x Lenalee and Lavi x Lenalee are side pairings and not main ones. I appreciate your POV, but please try to reserve judgements until I've fully explained why these things are as they are. Things are confusing right now for a reason, so bear with me XD**

**Much love, xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 11/06/12**


	5. Chapter 5: A Place Called Home

**Heya all of you :'3 It snowed at home recently, I'm so happy! *dances* Oh, and Happy Valentines Day (when it finally arrives XD). Thank you to Anactolica, Geeres, silverXshadow, bakaxusagi, ThorongilAnime, Stavarn100, kh07gl and Sapphire Quill for reviewing/subscribing/favouriting ~ Enjoy chapter 5 everyone!**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Never let your memories be greater than your dreams._

Doug Ivester

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 5 - A Place Called Home

It was still dark when Bookman sent Lavi and Allen to collect water.

Waking them up by whacking the metal grill over the fire with his Innocence, and causing the pair of them to jolt awake like they'd been electrocuted, the old man kicked them out of the hut and ordered them to find the nearest spring. Which was just over 4 miles away. Up a series of very steep and treacherous paths of ice and snow.

It was going to be an interesting morning, no doubt.

"You ready, 'sprout?"

"I'm not a beansprout, stupid Lavi!"

Tightening his hold on the handle before him, Allen looked up at the top of the cliff some 20 metres above them, where he could just about see the tip of the handle of Lavi's hammer. By using his Innocence, they would cut off about half a mile of their journey. It wasn't much, but anything was better than nothing.

Almost unconsciously, Lavi wrapped an arm around the younger teen's waist before pulling them upwards. This earnt him an elbow to the stomach from a somewhat red-faced Allen once they reached the top. After waiting impatiently for the red head to stop whining about Allen's violent side and bring his Innocence back to its normal size, the two Exorcists headed up a meandering pathway that slowly wound its way around the side of the mountain, small rocks and boulders blocking their way frequently as they walked. Allen's Innocence made quick work of them.

By daybreak the two of them were sweaty and tired out, as well as freezing their asses off and suffering from dehydration and hunger, in Allen's case, and the thought of Bookman and Link being warm and comfortable in the hut many metres below them also didn't improve their moods.

"This is all your fault, stupid beansprout," Lavi grumbled, kicking lumps of ice and rock out of his way as he rounded a corner. "If you had remembered to keep the bottles near the fire like Gramps asked, we would be warm and maybe even still asleep right now!"

"My fault? You were the one distracting me!" Allen snapped in reply, cutting a boulder in half with Crown Clown before stomping through the rubble.

"Me? What the hell did _I_ do?"

"Y-you were being distracting! What are you, deaf?"

"Distracting how?"

"..."

"C'mon, answer the question!"

"Y-you know what you did..."

And with that cryptic comment Allen trudged off into the snow, hiding the embarrassed flush on his face with his Innocence's cloak. Lavi, for quite a while, simply stood in silence with a stupid expression on his face, blinking repeatedly. Then he finally got it. And smirked.

Quickly walking forwards to catch up with him, Lavi swung an arm around Allen's shoulder and gave a huge grin.

"Aww, am I just too much for you, _wo de ai ren_ ~ ?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about!"

Allen shoved the red head's arm off of him and tried to hide the fact that he had gone bright red. He failed. Lavi chuckled in amusement, thinking to himself that Allen was cute when he blushed, then mentally slapped himself. Then, suddenly, Lavi came grinding to halt, blinking as Allen continued to storm ahead. The red head facepalmed.

"Umm, beansprout?"

"The name's Allen!"

"... You're about to fall off a cliff."

"W-what?"

Facing forward, Allen realised that in his embarrassment and annoyance he had failed to notice the approaching cliff edge. With a startled cry he stopped with less than a metre between himself and a drop of several hundred metres into an icy grave. Cheeks burning, he turned towards Lavi with an indignant pout.

"You could have told me I was about to walk off a cliff, you idiot!"

"What am I, Two Spot? You kinda should have realised yourself, _bái chī ._"

"Y-yeah, well, friends are meant to look out for each other, aren't they? What if I'd fallen off and -"

"Friends, huh?"

At this Allen turned silent. Green met grey and, very briefly, Allen saw an unidentifiable emotion in the red head's eye that seemed both sad and slightly exasperated. A split second later, Lavi's single eye became as emotionless and blank as it was usually. The older teen smiled.

"Shall we keep going, beansprout?"

"It's Allen, stupid..." came the somewhat subdued reply.

Continuing up the path in an awkward silence, Lavi and Allen headed northwards up the rocky track, the sun rising slowly across the brightening sky above them. Eventually, when it was almost fully morning, the pair of Exorcists reached a major obstacle - the next path they needed to take was almost entirely composed of a sheer sheet of ice, small areas of snow providing the most pitiful of places to step on. Lavi and Allen both sighed.

"So... what now?" Allen asked tentatively, turning towards Lavi with a frown. The red head shrugged.

"It's the only way up to the spring, so we ain't got much of a choice but to go up it," he replied whilst idly adjusting his bandana and eyepatch. "If we're careful, we should be able to make it."

Nodding to show he understood, Allen stepped towards the icy path and cautiously placed a foot on it. It instantly slid downwards; his boots had no grip on the ice whatsoever. He frowned. After testing a few more areas with the same result, Allen decided to try something different.

"Innocence Activate, Sword of Exorcism!"

Converting his left arm into a large broadsword, Allen shoved the weapon into the path before him and gave a satisfied smile when it stuck firmly into the ice. He turned towards Lavi.

"If I use this and you use your hammer, I think we can make it up," Allen explained with a smile. "And if I connect us both with my Crown Belt we shoudn't slip, hopefully."

"It might just work actually," Lavi murmured, removing his Innocence from its holster and activating it. "Let's give it a go."

Turning it so that the spike on his hammer's head was pointing downwards, Lavi went to stand beside Allen, extending his right arm so that Allen could connect them together. A strand of white fabric wrapped around his sleeve tightly. The both of them nodded.

"Okay, let's do this!"

Lavi shoved his Innocence into the icy path beside Allen's sword, keeping a firm grip on the handle as he stepped onto the head of his hammer and helped to pull Allen forwards. The younger teen stepped forwards tentatively and pulled out his sword, managing to free it with little resistance. He then walked forwards, feet slipping on the ice, his only lifeline the fabric connecting himself to Lavi. The red head winced a little and tried to keep his arm from moving. Stabbing his Innocence into the path half a metre from Lavi's hammer, it was then Allen's turn to pull his friend forwards, gripping the handle of the Sword of Exorcism tightly.

The two of them continued to do this repeatedly, making their way slowly up the path. By about halfway, both Lavi and Allen were exhausted.

"So hungry..." Allen grumbled, grimacing as his stomach gurgled hungrily for what seemed like the 50th time in about a minute. Lavi slumped against the handle of his hammer, panting a little.

"Gotta... stop..."

The red headed Exorcist sat down on the head of his hammer, sighing as he leaned his back against the handle. His arm ached like hell, and the lack of water was causing his head to throb painfully. Turning towards Allen and noticing that he was in a similar predicament, Lavi yanked on Crown Belt with a chuckle and pulled Allen forwards so that he was sitting somewhat sprawled on his lap.

"W-what the hell Lavi?" Allen demanded instantly, flicking the red head behind him with an annoyed, and slightly flustered, expression. "I can rest without this physical contact, thank you very much!"

"Aw, cool it Allen," Lavi replied with a laugh, sliding his arms around the teen with a grin. "You know you love it really ~ "

Allen huffed in reply. He didn't remove the arms wrapped around his waist though; instead, he leant back against the red head and gave a sigh as he allowed himself to relax. It was nice, he had to admit - Lavi's embrace was warm and relaxing, and the heartbeat he felt against his back was comforting in an odd way.

"Am I really just a friend to you, Allen?" the red head asked softly, resting his head on Allen's shoulder and looking at him curiously. For a while Allen said nothing, his expression turning thoughtful. Eventually the white haired teen sighed, turning away from Lavi slightly.

"Of course you're not," he murmured. "I just..."

"Just what?"

"I just... find this a little _too_ new and different right now."

At this, Lavi rolled his eyes with a smile and hugged the teen in his arms tightly.

"But that's the same with everything, right? All things become easier to adjust to with time," Lavi replied. "We just need to take it slow."

"Take it slow?" Allen echoed, turning his head towards Lavi questioningly. The red head laughed.

"What I meant was we don't have to rush things, and I don't want to make you feel like I'm forcing you to be used to this just yet. We both need time to think, to be honest!" Lavi said with a smile. "This is just as new and weird for me, ya know..."

Allen returned the smile at Lavi's words, realising that it was a new experience for not only himself, but Lavi also. It comforted him to know that they would take the steps towards developing a strong relationship between them together.

And, suddenly, being in love didn't seem so scary after all.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Where are you going Lenaleeeeee~!"

Komui grabbed onto his sister's leg like a little child as she attempted to walk out of his office. Lenalee whacked him on the head with a fist, glaring.

"You're fine now _ge-ge_! Your hangover went ages ago!"

"No it didn't! I still feel horrible and sick! Come, stay with me and I'll sing you a lulla-"

"NO!"

Lenalee kicked her brother in the face, sending him sprawling onto the floor.

"I'm busy, _ge-ge_!" she said despairingly, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I'll be back to serve you some coffee later, okay?"

"Okay…" Komui replied, sniffing. Rolling her eyes, Lenalee gave her brother a quick hug then left him to carry on with his work. Or, rather, to probably bug Reever and slack off.

Heading down the Order's main corridor, Lenalee weaved her way through the throngs of people quickly, humming as she went. She wasn't actually that busy, which made her feel slightly guilty. But, then again, there was only so much she could handle when it came to her brother and his sister complex.

She needed to check on Miranda and Kanda, which was something she had been wanting to do for most of the previous day and that day too. Ever since Lavi and Allen had left to go on their mission to Bookman Headquarters, Lenalee had found herself rather lonely and without any company. But she had wanted to give Miranda and Kanda some space, though, for they were the two closest people to Marie.

As this came to mind, Lenalee found herself slowing down. The loss of yet another 'nakama', another piece of her world, had been so hard to take. Marie had always been a good friend, and someone she always went to, after Kanda, when she felt depressed – the man's presence was so calming, and he never judged anyone by their appearance or backgrounds. Lenalee remembered when Allen was still new to the Order, and he had commented on the fact that Marie hadn't even glared or taken any notice, seemingly, of his white hair or cursed eye.

Lenalee found herself smiling as she entered the Cafeteria, thinking about Allen and Lavi, and the interesting developments that she might and might not have had a hand in instigating.

"Pig tails!"

Turning around, the chinese Exorcist smiled as Timothy approached her and gave her what she took to be an affectionate pinch on the ass.

"Hey, Timothy," she said, ruffling the boy's short blue hair. He grinned in reply. "How've you been?"

"Things have been good! Emily's been teaching me history, and I went on a mission recently and totally kicked this Akuma to high heaven and-"

And the young Exorcist continued to ramble on and on, waving his arms around like an idiot as he and Lenalee walked slowly through the Cafeteria. Lenalee didn't mind the boy's presence though – he was so full of innocence and naïveté, which she wished she had still had when she was his age.

"By the way, Timothy, have you seen Kanda or Miranda around anywhere?"

"Who, Kitch and Panda Bags? Well, I haven't seen Panda Bags anywhere but Kitch was training in the dojo the last time I saw him," Timothy explained, his nicknames for Kanda and Miranda making Lenalee laugh. "His Innocence is so cool now! It's a Crystal Type like yours, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is…" came the somewhat quiet reply from Lenalee. When they eventually reached the huge double doors leading out of the Cafeteria, she turned around to face Timothy and gave a parting wave and smile.

"I have to go now. Be good for Emily, okay? And next time you see Lavi, ask him about the history he knows – it'll be interesting," Lenalee said with a smile, patting the boy on the head.

"Sure! Eyepatchy will be back soon, right?"

"Probably. See you soon, 'kay?"

And with that, Lenalee left the boy standing and waving by the Cafteria's double doors, laughing yet again over the boy's nicknames for people.

"He's so like Lavi…"

As the red headed Exorcist came to mind again, like earlier, Lenalee found herself thinking back on the Lavi's newly discovered feelings for Allen. She felt somewhat sad about it all though, no matter how happy she felt that the two of them had fallen for each other.

She had never met someone quite like Allen; someone who had undergone such horrors throughout his life, yet always managed to keep going and keep fighting, no matter how hopeless the situation or how powerful the opponent. His faith in humanity and for the future was staggering, and she agreed with Lavi – it was dazzling. He was like their beacon of hope amidst the pitch black darkness of the war. And when Lenalee thought of how hard Allen was fighting for all of them, she knew that she could keep fighting until she took her last breath.

Prior to the past few months, she had been almost convinced that Allen was in love with her. And now Lenalee almost regretted not taking things further than idle feelings between them - she had never felt so strongly towards a person before Allen, and now that his heart belonged to someone else, Lenalee felt as if she would never find love before it was too late.

However, as these thoughts came to mind, Lenalee scowled and mentally shook her head. She _would_ find love; she just hadn't found that special person yet.

"Che, watch where you're going!"

With a jolt, Lenalee realised that she had almost walked straight into Kanda, who was holding her at arms length to prevent the two of them from colliding. She blushed and gave an embarrassed laugh.

"Sorry, I should have been watching where I was going..."

"_Baka_..."

"Hey, you know I hate it when you talk in Japanese and I have no idea what you've just said," Lenalee grumbled, pouting and crossing her arms. Kanda rolled his eyes.

"Fine, I called you stupid. Happy?"

"... No."

"You're impossible, you know that?"

"But so are you."

At this, Lenalee smiled and laughed, and Kanda tried his best not to smirk.

"So, where were you headed?" the Chinese girl asked, moving out of the way of a group of scientists pushing a file laden trolley down the corridor.

"Meditating," came the brief reply as Kanda moved also, glaring at the trolley as if Komui was hiding in it.

"Can I join you?"

For a little while, Kanda was silent. Then, after a minute or so, he sighed in resignation.

"Fine..."

With a happy smile, Lenalee grabbed Kanda by the arm and headed towards the room set aside for meditating or prayers, ignoring her friends protests at being dragged along the corridor. After a few detours, wherein Lenalee hid behind a statue as her brother skipped past and Kanda tried to get Jiji to leave him alone and stop recounting his drunken escapades, the two of them managed to reach the Shrine, as it was known by, without any unwanted tag-alongs.

Sitting down and sighing, Lenalee and Kanda began to meditate, the silence punctuated solely by the dull sounds from the nearby corridors. After about 20 minutes of silence, however, Lenalee fidgeted a little where she sat as she fought back the urge to talk. Kanda saw right through her.

"If you've got something to say, say it," he grumbled, eyebrow twitching slightly. "Is Lvellie bothering you again?"

"No, it's not that..." Lenalee answered, smiling almost nervously. "I just wanted to know how you were."

At this, Kanda opened his eyes and glanced down at the stigmata on his bare forearms before closing his eyes again with a slight exhale of breath.

"I'm... fine. There's nothing to worry about..." he replied. "Now shut up and meditate."

And with that, Kanda fell silent. And with a smile Lenalee did the same, knowing that her friend would confide in her if he had any major problems botherng him, which never happened anyways.

Because Kanda was, well, Kanda.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

It was nearly mid-morning by the time Allen and Lavi reached the spring. It was frozen when they got there, which made Allen want to throw himself off the nearest cliff, but Lavi quickly used a Fire Seal to melt the ice. Allen felt rather stupid after that.

It didn't take long for the water bottles to be full of fresh freezing cold water, and soon enough the two of them were making their way back to the hut.

"Can't we just use the Ark to get back?" Lavi asked, looking down at the ice covered slope before him anxiously. Allen shook his head.

"Link will kill me if I do, and you know it," the white haired teen replied curtly, though he wished he could use the Ark as well. "We'll just have to slide down, perhaps?"

And that's when Lavi got an amazing idea.

"Hey hey, beansprout! We can use my hammer to go down the path!"

"The name's Allen! And no way in hell."

"Aww, why not?"

"Because we'll most surely die in the process, that's why!"

"Nah, we'll be fine! Trust me, it'll be fun!"

"No. I'd rather die."

"Fine, I'll leave you up here to freeze then."

And with that, Lavi activated his Innocence. Just as he was about to sit down on its head and push himself down the path, Allen sighed irritably and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Fine, fine, I'll come. But be careful."

"Sure sure. Now hop on – I'm really tired of all this snow."

Carefully sitting in front of the red headed Bookman, Allen gulped as he saw just how steep the slope in front of them was. And, if he looked carefully enough, the slope led onto the next series of paths pretty much all the way to the lower parts of the mountain.

It was going to be a bumpy ride.

"You ready?" Lavi asked with a grin, sliding one arm around Allen's waist and using the other to hold onto the handle of his Innocence. Allen sighed.

"As ready as I'll ever be..."

And with that, Lavi pushed them down the slope with his feet.

"Holy CRAAAAPPPP!"

With a speed that marvelled Lenalee's, the two Exorcists slid downwards. Allen clutched onto the front of the hammer for dear life.

Lavi, however, seemed to find the whole thing hilariously funny, and laughed as they hurtled down the mountain as if they were on some sort of pony ride on the beach.

"Good god, watch out!" Allen cried as they sped towards the edge of a cliff. Lavi, using his feet, quickly turned them rightwards down the next slope. He rolled his eyes.

"Calm down! Just sit back and enjoy the ride!"

"What the hell's wrong with you!"

Soon enough, the two of them were nearly at the high cliff edge that they had climbed up earlier that morning. Lavi grinned.

"Wooh, nearly there!"

As soon as he spotted the approaching cliff edge, Lavi dug his feet into what was supposed to be snow. But, instead, his feet slid on pure ice.

"Wh-what the?"

Somehow, the snow had frozen over and Lavi had no grip on the ground's surface whatsoever. He gulped.

"H-hey, Lavi! C'mon, we're nearly at the cliff!"

"... I can't stop the hammer, Allen."

Turning around to face him, Allen followed Lavi's gaze and gulped when he saw the ice they were sliding on. And, when he faced forward, he saw that the cliff was only 6 metres away.

5 metres.

4 metres.

3.

2.

1.

"Hang on!"

Activating his Innocence so fast that Lavi didn't even see his left arm transform, Allen grabbed the cliff edge just as they fell off over it. And, using his Clown Belt, grabbed Lavi too.

"G-gahh, my hammer!"

Pushing off from the cliff face with his feet, Lavi reached forwards and seized hold of his Innocence's handle before it dropped to the floor many metres below. He sighed in relief.

"That was a close one, huh..."

Groaning and wincing at the weight of both himself, Lavi and Lavi's Innocence, Allen pulled them up onto the cliff edge, digging his Crown Clown into the icy ground. As soon as they could stand up, Allen punched Lavi right in the face, expression livid.

"HOW STUPID ARE YOU!"

Lavi tumbled to the ground with a thud. Sitting up and rubbing the side of his face, the red head pouted and looked at Allen with puppy dog eyes.

"I didn't know the snow had frozen over! And we're safe, so there's no need to stress, right?"

"Ohh, you stupid... gahh- !"

However, no matter how annoyed Allen was over their 'near death experience', Lavi was right – they hadn't fallen off the cliff and splatted to the ground, so why stress over it?

With a sigh, Allen walked forward and helped Lavi up. Then, almost shyly, kissed the older teen on the cheek where he'd hit him, mumbled an apology, and started walking down the slope that led to the hut.

Grinning like an idiot, Lavi followed him.

/ / / / / / / / / / / /

By the time they reached the hut, it was midday and Allen was so hungry that Lavi swore his stomach was going to create an avalanche. Bookman seemed less than happy when they returned.

"Where _have _you been?" he snapped, glaring vehemently at the two of them. The two Exorcists pushed past the old man without replying and sat in front of the roaring fire, completely ignoring both Bookman and Link who now looked as if they were going to murder them both.

"You should have been back ages ago!" Link said angrily. "I was almost at the brink of contacting Central for suspected tr-"

"We were just collecting the water, like you asked," Allen interrupted with a grumble, placing his hands close to the fire.

"We're cold, hungry, tired and thirsty too, so leave us alone will ya?" Lavi snapped back. Bookman and Link backed off instantly; an angry Lavi was not a nice one.

After about an hour of 'defrosting', according to the both of them, Lavi and Allen eventually agreed to set out again with Bookman and Link for the last leg of their journey.

They were going to reach Bookman Headquarters by noon. It wasn't a comforting thought, in Lavi's mind.

The going was easier than it had been the day before though; the snow was a lot less deep now, which meant no more amusing incidents with Bookman falling into holes, unfortunately, but at least it meant that they weren't going to be cold for much longer.

About halfway up, whilst they were having a quick rest in a small alcove in the mountainside, Allen tentatively poked Lavi's shoulder; the red head had been staring off into space with a somewhat eerily blank expression for at least 5 minutes solid. Both Bookman and Link were facing the other way, so Allen quickly wrapped his arms around Lavi and hugged him. Lavi gave him a small, but grateful smile.

"Don't worry about me," he whispered, gently pushing Allen away from him just before Bookman turned around to head outside the alcove. "I just need some time..."

"Okay," Allen replied just as quietly. He smiled, then picked up his stuff from a nearby rock. "I'm here for you when you need me."

"I know."

And, with a smile, Lavi stood up and picked his stuff up, joining Link and Bookman outside on the path.

The next few days were going to be tough – Lavi's past was always a bitter topic for him, and going back to a place he hated, where he had been looked down on and treated like crap, was something he wished he would never have to experience again.

But, like the innkeeper from the bottom of the mountain had said; Lavi was an Exorcist now. He had battled more Akuma than he could count, and faced off against members of the Noah Clan yet lived to tell the tale.

He wasn't the weak child he had been 13 years prior. He had grown up, become thicker skinned, seen and experienced worse things than being looked down on by stuck-up members of a Clan who were too introverted to notice their own narcissism and selfish pride in things that didn't matter.

Lavi decided, as he and the others reached the gate that marked the entrance to Bookman Headquarters, that no matter what was said or mentioned whilst they were there he would keep his head held high, keep smiling, and keep walking forward.

Because if Allen could do it, so could he.

"Welcome back, Bookman."

Standing in front of the entrance to the large building before them, its huge ornate double doors covered in runes of some ancient language long since dead, was an old man with a long grey beard and a bent back, his small beady eyes glinting with both intelligence and knowledge beyond that of most humans. Bookman stepped forward and bowed respectively.

"How have the years treated you, old friend?" the old man asked Bookman, giving him the smallest and most fleeting of smiles that both Link and Allen missed altogether.

"I am well," Bookman replied curtly. "Forgive me for being brief, but we have been on the road for a long time, and would like to seek the warmth of the Clan building."

"Of course, of course," the old man replied. He glanced over at the rest of the group at that point, his gaze meeting that of the others but lingering most on Lavi's single green eye that refused to meet his own. The old man gave a quiet chuckle.

"I see your apprentice is just as stubborn and rude as ever," he said, his tone showing no hint of emotion, yet it made Lavi grit his teeth all the same.

"And I see you're just as up yourself as ever, Head Archiver," Lavi muttered under his breath so no-one but Allen could hear. The white haired teen tried his best not to smile.

The Head Archiver grunted, narrowing his eyes at the red headed Exorcist who now, almost defiantly, met his gaze. The old man sighed, and looked away, gesturing towards the double doors that led inside.

"Follow me."

And with that, the old man walked up to the front doors, pushed them open and entered the building, expecting the others to follow. Before they went inside, however, Bookman stomped up to his apprentice and gave him a rather hard hit on the head.

"Oi, stupid panda! What was that for?"

"Show some respect while you're here!" Bookman snapped, glaring at Lavi with narrowed eyes. "No matter how tedious, we have to be here – so stop acting like an immature brat and act more like the successor I've been raising all these years!"

At those words, Lavi sighed a little then nodded.

"Will do, Gramps."

Sighing a little himself, Bookman turned away and walked into the building before them. Link, Allen and Lavi followed soon after.

The hallway that they entered was huge; bigger, even than the hallways of the previous Black Order Headquarters. Various artifacts, like scrolls, suits of armour and statues of people that Allen and Link couldn't recognise, lined the walls as if the knowledge of the Bookman Clan itself was physically on show.

Lavi was becoming increasingly annoyed as they headed onwards through the seemingly never-ending corridor. He remembered always hating these relics of the past, and the length of the corridor they were heading down too. When ever he had tried to run away, which happened periodically during his stay at Headquarters, Lavi remembered distinctly how no matter how fast he ran, he never seemed to reach the end of the corridor before the Guardians caught him, as if the corridor were history and he was vainly trying to go back to a time before.

A sudden question from the Head Archiver towards Allen, however, brought Lavi back from his childhood memories.

"So, you are the Destroyer of Time?"

Allen turned towards the bearded old man and gave an affirmative nod, trying not to show any discomfort as the man stared at him intently.

"I am, yes," he replied quietly, choosing to avoid the Head Archiver's stares and look forwards.

"And you are also the 14th Noah?"

At this, Allen stopped and stared wide-eyed at the old man, who laughed at his shocked expression.

"Bookman may be the only one who collects history out on the field, but we have our own sources of information too," the Head Archiver said with amusement, noting that Lavi looked as if he wanted to punch him. The old man tried his best not to smirk.

"Then forgive me for correcting you, sir," Allen answered curtly, expression turning apathetic as he continued walking once more. "But I am not the 14th Noah; he simply resides within me, which is where he is going to stay."

"Is that so?" came the amused reply from the bearded Clan member. "Interesting..."

Link remained stonily silent while the two conversed, his eyes narrowing at Allen's statement. Was the boy really convinced that he would be able to fight the Noah off? This question was one that Link couldn't answer, and he felt almost guilty at the conviction in Allen's eyes; he had always assumed that the white haired teen had been in league with the Noah, a double spy fighting for both the Order and the Earl.

But now Link wasn't so sure. The boy never showed any signs of cohorting with the Noah, and showed no hesitation in fighting Akuma and members of the Noah Clan alike, showing only concern for his comrades and loyalty towards the Black Order.

Had Link been wrong all this time?

"Yo, Two Spot, hurry up! You don't want to get lost in here, trust me," Lavi called out. Link, with a jolt, realised that he had almost been walking at a snail's pace; the rest of the group were several metres ahead of him. Coughing with slight embarrassment, the blonde CROW hurried forwards and continued walking with the rest of the group.

As he did so, Link narrowed his eyes at the red headed Bookman walking by his side. Even if Allen wasn't the traitor Central thought him to be, he was still a heretic to the Catholic Church and the Vatican because of his relationship with Lavi, in Link's opinion.

There was no doubt in his mind that the two were romantically involved with each other. They hid it extremely well; neither of them were stupid and knew the consequences of being found out by the Order. But Link had caught on the moment a Finder loyal to Central came to him about the white haired boy. The Finder had overheard Allen show his master's golem the compass Lavi had bought him – nothing could disguise the tenderness and happiness with which the boy talked about the gift, according to the Finder. The same man also apparently saw the two of them embracing on the roof of the Order soon before Kanda returned with the news of Marie's death.

But what was he to do? All Link had was speculation and the supposed eye-witness account from the Finder.

He needed proof, and he was going to get it one way or another.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- bái chī = idiot (mandarin chinese)

- ge-ge = big brother (mandarin chinese)

- wo de ai ren = my love (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**So that's chapter 5! I hope you enjoyed reading it. Things'll go back to the poems, and who the Heart is, soon – but I had to include all this 'filler' if you like ;D**

**Thanks again for reading, please leave a review, and I'll try to update as soon as I can, 'kay? Love you all ~**

**xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 11/06/12**


	6. Chapter 6: 'Me'

**Yo ~ ;3 Thank you to patrick the almighty observer, Anactolica, bakaxusagi, Geeres, mochi1412, kh07gl and Anim110 for reviewing/subscribing/favouriting. Oh, and I've finally edited the previous chapters and corrected mistakes, etc. Ahh I fail... Oh yeah, and for some reason ff . net is being really tempermental with me, so I can't review, answer reviews or answer PMs -.-" So yeah, if it seems like I'm giving you the cold shoulder, I'm not :c **

**Oh and bakaxusagi - Your latest chapter was amazing, please keep doing Allen's POV! *hugs* When the website stops screwing me over, we'll continue our convo, 'kay? I miss talking to youuuuu ~ /headdesk**

**Anyway *coughs*, here's chapter 6, enjoy ~**

**NOTE: Lavi is gonna be acting somewhat... uncontrolled in this? All I'll say is don't judge - there's a reason behind his OOCness!**

**EDIT (11/06/12): Thankyou to MidnightAbyssx02 for correcting my Chinese :'D**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_The hardest challenge is to be yourself in a world where everyone is trying to make you be somebody else._

E. E. Cummings

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 6 - 'Me'

Even after 13 years the place hadn't changed whatsoever.

It was as if time didn't touch the Headquarters of the Bookman Clan, protecting the precious historical records they treasured so much. The rooms, the people, the dust that covered everything, the very atmosphere... Lavi began to feel more and more like his 6 year old self as they headed deeper inside the building.

"Are we there yet?"

Link turned towards Allen, his eyes silently scolding the teen for whining. Allen pouted a little and returned to silently following the two old men in front of them, whilst perodically smiling at Lavi to try and cheer him up. He wasn't really improving the red head's mood, however. The turmoil his usually cheery friend was experiencing was almost tangible; Allen could practically _feel_ the anger coming off of Lavi in waves. The older teen was staring straight ahead, single eye scarily devoid of emotion, fists clenched, teeth gritted. He looked like a whipped dog that had been forced to return to its abusive master for fear of starving.

Allen wanted nothing more than to summon the Ark and drag Lavi off somewhere safe, far away from these horrible people. He wanted to hug him, comfort him, hold him in his arms and make him feel _loved_. But the fact was that he could do absolutely nothing for his friend at that point. It was beyond frustrating.

As the group entered a larger hallway, more people began to walk past them, all stopping and staring and muttering to each other, narrowing their eyes at Lavi especially. Said red head could practically feel their gazes boring into the back of his head. Gritting his teeth and trying to show as much self-pride as possible, he kept walking.

Lavi hated this so much it hurt. The stares, the whispers, the snide glances and smirks and looks of disgust in people's eyes. His age didn't even seem to matter here - in their eyes he was no different now to what he had been back then. And it crushed his resolve, his masks, his fake exterior that he upholded. He felt 'Lavi' and even 'Bookman Junior' start to slip away as he took step upon step further into his personal hell. And a part of himself that had been silent for over a decade was stirring.

And It was angry.

Lavi dimly started to feel panic bubbling inside of him; Bookman had warned him before, when he first started adopting personas, that one's true self could break free of the persona's hold and take control, if only for a brief time.

All It needed was a spark to set it free.

At that point the group suddenly exited the corridor and reached a circular cavern that was empty apart from a lift in the center of the room. The Head Archiver stopped and turned towards them.

"This lift leads to the lower levels of the Clan building. Directly below us are the Dormitories, below that the Libraries and Education Rooms, and last of all the Archives," the old man explained. "A Guardian will accompany all but Bookman and his... apprentice... to the Guest Wing."

"Where are they being taken?" Allen demanded instantly, feeling a surge of protectiveness towards Lavi, who was becoming more and more unsettled. Head Archiver laughed.

"Fear not, 14th - they must meet with the Clan Head and report to him on the records they've collected, that's all."

"He's not a Noah, _kàn mā dè_!"

Lavi's shout echoed around the huge room, the silence that followed deafening. The red head was literally shaking with pent-up anger and frustration, and the teen's single green eye was suddenly so full of malice that Head Archiver was surprised that the teen hadn't tried to strike him down yet. Allen turned to face Lavi, eyes full of both gratitude and worry.

"As hot-headed as ever, I see," Head Archiver replied curtly, adjusting a few levers beside the lift whilst he spoke. "Aren't Bookmen supposed to be objective and calm? You're not doing a very good job here, old friend," he added, turning towards Bookman. Lavi's fists clenched tighter.

"And I'll tell you now what I told you 13 years ago, _old friend_," Bookman answered, eyes narrowed. "I made the right choice."

At this, Lavi turned to face his master, expression softening. He remembered that day clearly - it was his last day at Headquarters and the day he finally accepted the title of Bookman Junior.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Flashback - 10/08/1874_

The sun shone faintly through the slightly parted curtains of a small window, illuminating a messy bedroom with piles of books and random items of clothing scattered everywhere. Curled up on a tiny mattress under a small scratchy blanket was a small boy of around 6 years, red hair sticking up in all directions, eyes closed, tiny hands clutching the edges of the blanket.

He had a name, for his mother had given him one. But he could not remember that name, and soon enough he would have no need of one anyway.

For he was going to become a Bookman.

However the Clan referred to him solely as _jiànhuò_, for they viewed both his origins, background and very identity as disgusting. But he was used to it.

The Medic, though, always referred to him as _baka usagi-chan_, whatever that meant; she was the only person apart from Bookman who treated him okay.

As the boy awoke, groaning and tucking his head under his blanket, the dim thought came to mind that he would never return to this room, or building even, ever again. And it was this thought that made the red head sit up abruptly, now wide awake.

"I'm leaving..."

At first, the boy sat with an almost melancholy expression. Then he grinned.

"I'm leaving!"

Leaping out of bed with a laugh, and tripping over his worn copy of _Macbeth_ and falling flat on his face in the process, the boy got dressed into the travelling clothes Bookman had given him, pulling his poncho over his head with a little difficulty. Last of all he put on a white scarf and a new eyepatch that the Medic had given him too, standing up with a smile.

"Time to go!"

Leaving his room and the rest of his belongings behind, for he wasn't going to need anything but what he was currently wearing, the red headed boy shut the door behind him and headed down the corridor towards the lift.

Carefully avoiding eye contact with all the people he walked past, for they seemed to ignore him and leave him alone when he did so, the red head quickly walked through the East Wing Dormitories and eventually reached the lift just as it arrived at his current floor.

"Ground Floor, please," he asked the lift operator quietly, looking at his leather boots intently whilst fiddling with the hem of his poncho. The lift operator grunted and, though he looked as if he'd rather leave the kid stranded in a snowy ditch somewhere, he stepped aside and let the little red head onto the lift, closing the gates and pulling a lever upwards. The lift jerked upwards suddenly, making the boy stagger forwards a little. He regained his balance almost instantly though, not wanting to appear weak in front of the man currently glaring at him.

After about a minute of tense silence, the lift shuddered to a halt and through the gates the boy could clearly see the busy main corridor. As the man opened the gate, the boy turned and bowed his head respectively towards the lift operator; it was his last day so the least he could do was be civil.

"_Xièxie_."

"_Qù __sǐ, jiànhuò_. Get the hell off my lift."

The boy winced, feeling stupid for assuming things would be any different. Nonetheless, he looked up and met the hostile gaze directed towards him and smirked.

"_Cào nǐ zǔzōng shíbā dài_."

And, with that insult, the red head waltzed out of the lift, leaving the operator seething with anger.

"...Well, there goes being civil."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"There is always time to change your mind, Bookman."

The old man snorted in reply, finishing his record with a few swift flicks of his ink brush.

"I have chosen him as my successor, accept it."

"Have you even considered the consequences? He's not of Clan blood, and his heritage is shadier and smuttier than the whore of Babylon! And, to top it all off, he's still mentally unstable - even you can't deny that, Bookman."

At this, Bookman stopped writing, sighing exasperatedly.

"He has a perfect memory. There are no threats of him becoming emotionally attached to people. He is not leaving anything behind by leaving, and there are no things to tie him down anywhere. He's young, intelligent, well-read, logical, and most of all, could adopt personas very easily indeed," Bookman explained, turning towards Head Archiver with an emotionless expression. "I have already discussed at length the issues you raise with the Council. I will not be swayed."

For a while the Head Archiver was silent. Then, sighing, he handed Bookman an ornate dagger; it was quite small as daggers went, its hilt made of gold, a single ruby adorning the blade.

Every Bookman apprentice was given a dagger, for both ceremonial and practical use, before they left Clan Headquarters and travelled for 12 years. It showed both strength and versatility, swiftness and power. The dagger confirmed the acceptance of the apprentice by the Clan.

"You have the Medic to thank for this," Head Archiver murmured, turning away from Bookman and heading for the door. "The Clan didn't wish to give him one."

The door slamming shut pierced the silence like a blade.

Bookman stood motionless for a while, expression thoughtful and somewhat concerned as he stared at the dagger in his hands. Then, with a huff, Bookman slipped the dagger into his cloak and smirked ever so slightly.

"You better not disappoint me, brat..."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

The Medic of the Bookman Clan sighed, running a hand through her short brunette hair. He was late; she had been waiting for nearly an hour with no sign or indication that the red head was even coming.

_Has he left already?_

Why the boy meant so much to Medic was beyond her. He had caused her nothing but stress during the year she had known him - from their first meeting, in which Medic had to deal with the child going from catatonic to psychotic to bipolar, and during all the instances in which the 5 year old had come to her battered and bruised, telling her everytime that he had tripped down the West Archive stairs, which was a lie.

Surely she should feel happy that he was leaving?

The thing was, she _did_ feel happy. But not because he would be out of her hair, but because the boy would finally be free. Free of the snobbery and egotistical Clan that had judged him on his background alone. Free of the people who looked down on him and beat him up. Free, even, of his painful memories, for the Medic doubted he would ever return to Headquarters willingly.

And though she would miss the boy with all his peculiarisms, like quoting entire books and plays verbatim by memory alone and insisting on having a pasta and _yakuniku-_only diet, Medic felt truly happy that the red head was becoming Bookman's apprentice.

Suddenly, the door to the infirmery swung open. Medic stood up, holding her breath. Then, with a yelp, the red headed soon-to-be Bookman Junior tripped on his poncho and hit the floor face first with a thud. Medic laughed.

"You okay, _baka usagi-chan_?"

Standing up with a huff, the red head brushed himself down and smiled.

"I'm fine, _féijíchǎng_!"

"I AM NOT FLAT CHESTED!"

The boy laughed - calling the Medic by his favourite nickname for her always pissed her off. He stopped laughing, however, when the brunette flicked him on the forehead.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For being rude! You'll never get a girlfriend with that attitude towards women, you know that?"

"Ahh I'll prove you wrong, just you wait!"

"Fine - let's make a bet. When you fall in love, you have to bring her here to see me as proof!"

"Deal!"

The pair of them laughed, both smiling. Then, after a while, Medic's expression softened.

"When do you head out?"

"In about 15 minutes." came the quiet, almost subdued, reply.

"I see..."

For a while, silence. Then, with a small smile, Medic walked closer towards the red headed boy and hugged him gently.

"Please take care of yourself," she murmured softly, pulling away from the boy and looking him straight in the eye. "Promise me you'll visit me?"

For a moment the child seemed torn almost, biting his lip and avoiding the woman's gaze. Then, smiling almost nervously, the red head looked up and nodded.

"I promise..."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Are you all set?"

"Yes."

Bookman nodded in acknowledgement. His apprentice did the same.

"Let's head off."

In silence the two Bookmen headed down the main corridor, making their way towards the exit. People stopped and bid farewell to Bookman as they passed, ignoring the red headed boy as if he wasn't even there. But, strangely enough, he didn't even care.

Because, for the first time in just over a year, he could walk towards the exit and be allowed to leave.

So though he knew the Medic would be the only one who would miss him, and though he knew they would drag his name, and Bookman's, through the dirt after they left, he didn't mind. In fact, as they finally reached the huge double doors that led to the outside world and pushed them open, the boy found himself trembling with excitement and could barely stop himself from grinning like an idiot.

And then, after a year of entrapment, he was finally free.

Beautifully cold fresh air was what he noticed first. Next, the slanting rays of golden sunlight filtering through a section of clouds high above in the cerulean blue sky. Then the coldness of the snow he had stepped in, and the cries of birds flying overhead, and how he could feel his fingertips start to go numb from cold.

"Are you just going to stand there like a fool?"

Jumping a little, the boy turned towards his master with an embarrassed smile.

"Sorry..."

"Hmph."

For a while both were silent, watching the sun break free of its cloudy mask and shine brightly on the mountains all around them. Then, with a huff, Bookman took out the dagger he had been keeping in his cloak and passed it to his apprentice. The boy took the weapon with wide eyes, speechless from shock.

"..."

"What, cat got your tongue brat?"

"... Head Archiver said I wasn't allowed to get a dagger, and that I would never be accepted by the Clan... I don't understand..."

At this quiet confession, Bookman narrowed his eyes then smirked.

"Looks like he was wrong then."

"But why? I thought..." the boy murmured, eye downcast. Bookman sighed and lightly flicked the red head on the forehead, receiving an 'oww' in reply. Then, almost affectionately, the old man placed a hand on the boy's head and gave the tiniest of smiles.

"I made the right choice."

And, for the first time in months, the boy smiled a true smile and meant it from the very depths of his heart.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Allen gave Lavi a reassuring smile as the lift took the Head Archiver, Link and himself down to the Dormitories, his smile fading just before the red head and Bookman disappeared from view. Lavi sighed.

"Bookman?"

Turning around, both master and apprentice faced the Guardian standing before them whose black cloak and hood disguised his features, a black mask also covering the lower half of the man's face. Bookman nodded in acknowledgement.

"The Council would like to see you and your apprentice now."

And, with that, the Guardian turned around and headed down a small corridor to the left of the building's main hallway, Bookman and Lavi following close behind him. The corridor was dark, the dim light of numerous candles sitting in alcoves in the walls just about lighting their way. And, as they headed down towards the Council Room, Lavi found himself remembering the first, and only time, he had been before the Council.

It hadn't been a pleasant experience.

He had only been at Headquarters for a couple of months and had, in fact, only just recovered from being catatonic (which Lavi himself barely remembered being). The Council had been unsympathetic towards him, cruel almost. Looking back, Lavi could understand their point of view somewhat - Bookman had literally brought this unwelcome stranger into their home who, despite being elligible for the role of Bookman Junior, had the mental stability of a vegetable. In addition, Lavi's background had done him no favours. In fact, his background was probably the main reason why the Council ended up despising him so much.

So, when Bookman dragged Lavi away from the clutches of the Medic, who had been taking care of him since he had arrived, and took him to see the Council, they pretty much point-blank refused to let him become Bookman's apprentice. No matter what Bookman said, they turned Lavi down and requested his immediate removal from the building. Lavi remembered, somewhat fuzzily, that he didn't actually mind.

He still thought he had a home to go back to at that point.

As this came to mind, Lavi's fists clenched tightly and the corridor span slightly as memories of his home hit him like a ton of bricks. Then, mentally blocking them out before he remembered That Day, Lavi took a deep breath in and recalled all the control techniques Bookman had taught him over the years. And, just as the Guardian reached the door that led to the Council Room, Lavi felt as calm and collected as he possibly could.

And, oddly enough, it was the thought of Allen waiting for him downstairs that gave Lavi all the determination he needed to walk through the door before him.

"_Hǎoj__ǐu bújiàn_, Bookman."

Standing before them were 12 individuals, all male and all over 50 years of age. They were the leaders of the main sections of the Bookman Clan, though the Archive section was not included within this, and the man who had spoken was none other than the Head of the Bookman Clan.

And the Clan Head was also the older brother of Bookman himself.

"_Wǔ__ān_, Your Grace," Bookman replied, only the slightest look of annoyance gracing his features before becoming expressionless. The old man had always been unable to stand the power his brother had over him, and boy did his sibling use that power to his advantage, that being self-evident from the smirk on the Clan Head's face.

With a nod of his head, the other members of the Council sat down in the large chairs situated behind them as the Clan Head sat. For some reason, despite the anxiety he felt at the 12 pairs of eyes staring at him, Lavi had the sudden temptation to laugh; the Clan Head looked ridiculously small in the chair he sat in, almost resembling a goblin of sorts. However, no matter how much he wanted to, Lavi knew better than to laugh at the man sitting before him - both he and Bookman were not on the best of terms with the Council, and he doubted they had changed their opinions of him since they had last met.

"It has been nearly 13 years since you left this building, Bookman. May I ask what delayed your return?" the Clan Head asked, resting his head in the palm of one hand, arm propped against his knee. Bookman tried not to sigh in annoyance.

"Myself and my apprentice are currently logging the war between the Millenium Earl and the Black Order, and we have been unable to come here due to several battles that have not let up until recently," Bookman explained with a monotone voice. The Clan Head narrowed his eyes.

"So you and your _apprentice_ are accomodators of Innocence then?"

"Yes."

"When did that occur?"

"Nearly two and a half years ago."

"That is a very long time, Bookman," the Head Education Supervisor said scoldingly, interlacing his gloved fingers with narrowed eyes. "Surely you should have moved on by now, especially considering the tension in Europe right now?"

"The war has only just begun, despite how long it has been going on for. The Destroyer of Time and the identity of the Heart, especially, are still in need of observation," Bookman replied curtly. The Education Supervisor fell silent.

At the mention of Allen, albeit not by name, Lavi's anxiety increased. But why did he feel so nervous? He fingered his Innocence idly, gritting his teeth.

Then, almost as if he had noticed Lavi's miniscule change in countenance, the Clan Head narrowed his eyes at the red head and smirked slightly.

"You. Bookman's apprentice."

Lavi looked up, surprised. Then, dimly remembering the etiquette Bookman had made him memorize before his first encounter with the Council, Lavi bowed his head respectively.

"Yes, Your Grace?"

At this, the Clan Head blinked. Then, the old man's smirk widened.

"What is the name of your current persona?"

"Lavi, Your Grace."

"That is Hebrew for lion, correct?"

"Correct."

"And how many personas have you had prior to 'Lavi'?"

"48."

The Council all shared looks of disbelief.

"Is that true, Bookman?" the Guardian Head asked, glaring at the red headed teen standing before him.

"It is correct, yes," came the slightly smug reply. The 12 Council members murmured amongst themselves before the Clan Head raised his hand to indicate silence.

"I want you to tell me every persona you have adopted and the name of all the wars you have logged since you left with Bookman," the old man asked, his tone bordering on being haughty. Lavi couldn't help but give a defiant smirk.

"Third Carlist War - Benigno, Fidel, Samuel; Red River War - Peter, George; Dungan Revolt - Ming, Jiang, Zhou, Qing; Great Sioux War - Benjamin, Johnathon; Satsuma Rebellion - Akio; Ninth Xhosa War - Addie, Takuma, Ilia; Russo-Turkish War - Dmitri, Adrian; Bannock War - Lewis; Lincoln County War - Alfred; Cheyenne War - Matthew, Damian; Second Anglo-Afghan War - Miykah, Osamu, Nikolai; Little War - Tomás, Antonio; Anglo-Zulu War - Oren; War of the Pacific - Fortunato, Gervasio, Lucio; Victorio's War - Andrès, Michael; First Boer War - Haru, Alexei; French Occupation of Tunisia - Pierre; Mahdist War - Salma, Ferruccio, Nikon, Russo; Mandingo Wars - Timofey, Adamo; Ekumeku War - Dara, Luka; First Madagascar Expedition - Achille, Etan; Tonkin Campaign - Qiu, Xiba; Sino-French War - Deak; God's War - Lavi."

The room was completely silent after Lavi finished speaking, the expressions on the Council members' faces a mix of surprised, angry and shocked. No-one there had expected Lavi to even be alive after 12 years, never mind having documented over 20 different wars with over 40 different personas.

During the silence, Lavi could hardly keep himself from grinning. It was only a very vehement, yet nonetheless equally smug, look from Bookman that kept Lavi expressionless.

After a good minute of quiet the Clan Head coughed and sat up, eyebrow twitching.

"You have a... _well-documented_... log; that cannot be denied. However, there is one thing I'd like to ask you, _Lavi_," the old man said sneeringly, eyes glinting. "Has having had so many personas taken its toll on your mental stability? Especially considering the state you were in when you first came here, hmm?"

Lavi stiffened. Then, after a few seconds of silence in which Bookman swore the teen was going to do something regretable, Lavi gave a sort of sickly sweet smile.

"I am as mentally sane as you are, _Your Grace_, and I object to being called such a thing as 'mentally unstable'," Lavi said, single green eye glinting. "Oh, and fuck you."

And, with that, Lavi turned tail and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Bookman was going to kill him.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Would you stop that ! ?"

Giving Link a smile, Allen stopped throwing his empty bottle at the chandelier above them, which he had been doing for the past half hour to see if he could break it, leaning back against the bed's headrest with a sigh.

"What are you getting so worked-up about?" Link demanded, glaring at the boy sitting nearby.

"I'm just worried about Lavi, that's all," Allen replied, staring up at the ceiling. "The people here are so hateful towards him..."

"There's probably some justification for it," Link stated bluntly.

"Is there? It seems pretty unjustified to me."

"But that's because you're naieve."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are, Walker. Stop being childish!"

"I'm not being childish."

"You're both being childish, now shut up!"

Looking up, both Link and Allen winced a little at the vehement glares Bookman was giving them, who had appeared out of nowhere in front of the door. Then, Allen frowned.

"Where's Lavi?"

At this, Bookman sighed.

"I haven't a clue. The brat is screwed when he does turn up though," the old man replied, expression turning murderous. Link and Allen turned towards each other, confused, before turning to face Bookman again.

"I'll go look for him," Allen murmured, standing up.

"And I will go also," Link said, following suit.

"No, you will not."

The blonde CROW turned towards Bookman, frowning.

"Why ever not?"

"You need to contact Central and notify them that we have arrived no? Is that not normal procedure?" Bookman said, lighting his pipe and taking a deep breath in. Link pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Fine. I'll go find a phone."

And, with that, the man left. Bookman sighed.

"Now isn't it nice and quiet?" the old man commented, smirking.

Allen laughed. Then, after a while, Bookman put down his pipe and turned to face Allen.

"If you wish to find my stupid apprentice, he's probably in his old room which is down the hallway. It's number 12."

Allen blinked, then smiled gratefully, standing up.

"Thank you."

And, leaving the old man alone, Allen made his way down the hall, keeping an eye on the numbered doors to either side of him. It didn't take long for the white haired teen to find number 12 and, knocking tentatively before entering, he walked inside and shut the door behind him.

"Lavi?"

No reply. The room was dark, the floor littered with dust covered books and mothball-ridden clothes that would only have fitted a small child. Allen's face fell. Then, just as he was about to leave, he noticed a small patch of red under the small bed in the corner of the room. Crouching down, Allen smiled as he spotted Lavi lying on the floor underneath the bed.

"You okay?" he asked quietly, concerned by the dimness of Lavi's single eye. After a period of silence, Lavi nodded then gave a small laugh.

"God, who am I kiddin'," the red head said, smiling bitterly. "Certainly not you, at any rate."

"Of course not."

Allen reached forwards, pulled Lavi out from underneath the bed with a firm tug, and hugged him tightly.

"You know that all of them aren't worth it, right?"

With a small heartfelt smile Lavi hugged Allen back, burying his face in the other boy's shoulder and holding him tightly.

"I know..."

For a while both of them stayed in each other's arms, the only sound being their soft breaths in and out. Then, pulling away gently, Lavi pressed his forehead against Allen's.

"Thank you," he murmured, eye closing. Allen smiled.

"You're welco-"

Grumble.

Both boys fell silent. Then Lavi laughed, rolling his eyes.

"Trust your stomach to ruin things, stupid 'sprout."

"The name's Allen!"

"I know."

Chuckling despite Lavi's teasing, Allen stood up and pulled the red head up with him. Then, shoving him out the door with a grin, Lavi walked beside Allen towards the Cafeteria, which was at the opposite end of the floor they were on. Then, just as they walked past the last few dormitory rooms, Lavi froze. Allen frowned.

"You okay?" he asked, concerned. The red head nodded and grinned in reply.

"Yep. Actually, there's somewhere I'd like to take ya before we eat."

At this, Allen raised an eyebrow but nodded and followed Lavi as he headed up some stairs to their right. The red head was grinning, and Allen couldn't help but do the same. He had been so worried about Lavi earlier, and to see him so happy and content raised Allen's spirits.

As they reached the top of he stairs, Lavi pulled Allen by the arm and headed down the new corridor towards a brightly lit room some 10 metres away. The corridor was empty of people, making the white haired teen wonder where on Earth his friend was taking him.

They reached the door and, with a smile, Lavi pushed it open. Inside was an infimery, several empty beds lining the walls, and a desk situated in the center of the room, where a brunette Japanese woman was sitting and writing in a file, forehead creased in concentration. Then, she looked up. And dropped her pen, which fell to the floor with a clatter. Lavi smiled.

"Long time no see, huh _féijíchǎng_? Oh, and I win the bet."

With a huge smile and tears in her eyes, Medic ran forwards and hugged the red head standing before her.

"Stupid _baka usagi-chan_..."

And Allen swore he'd never seen Lavi look so happy in all the time he had known him.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- kàn mā dè = goddammit (mandarin chinese)

- jiànhuò = something along the lines of 'despicable creature' (mandarin chinese) ... -.-"

- baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (japanese)

- xièxie = thank you (mandarin chinese)

- qù sǐ = go die / go to hell (mandarin chinese)

- cào nǐ zǔzōng shíbā dài = fuck your ancestors to the 18th generation XD (mandarin chinese) ... go Lavi, go Lavi *cheers* X3

- féijíchǎng = literally means 'airport', thus implying that someone is flat-chested ;D (mandarin chinese)

- hǎojǐu bújiàn = long time no see (mandarin chinese)

- wǔān = good afternoon (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**So that's chapter 6. I'm sorry the plot isn't really going anywhere -.-" Things'll get interesting soon, I promise! I'll try and update as soon as possible, and look out for chapter 7 soon, 'kay? Love you all ~**

**xrowa-chanx**

**EDITED: 11/06/12**


	7. Chapter 7: Moving Onwards

**Hello wonderful readers *smiles* I have to give up talking about anime/fanfiction and I CAN'T READ FANFICTION EITHER! This is for lent btw XD So yeah, bakaxusagi – I'll read Post-It Thief when my 40 days of torture are finished *shoots self* Oh and Jo-chan - I'll re-write your thing at some point *cries* Stupid technology...**

**Thank you to Geeres, kh07gl, dark-Yuuki-sama, Stavarn100, patrick the almighty observer, bakaxusagi, Lingering Sorrow and MidnightAbyssx02 for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing. Review replies are at the end. I have over 50 reviews now! *cheers* Thanks for all your support guys :'D So here's chapter 7 for you all, which is a long one too ^3^ Enjoy!**

**Note - whenever there is a flashback, Lavi will be referred to as his persona during that time, or by nicknames/no name. I can't call him Lavi since he is only called that in current events. Sorry if it gets confusing :S**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Can I explain the spun truth whilst drinking bitter coffee?_

_Oops, looks like it._

_The mask shows a part of a wonderful person._

_Don't shut out warm thoughts._

_The needs of a time respond._

Suzumura Kenichi - Persona

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 7 - Moving Onwards

To say Medic was happy was an understatement.

After hugging Lavi until he could no longer breathe, leading to Allen having to physically pull the woman off of the red head before he passed out, Medic promptly burst into tears, only being consoled eventually by Allen introducing himself.

"Allen Walker?" Medic asked, wiping her eyes and blowing her nose. "It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Allen replied, feeling somewhat confused and a little worried by the woman standing before him. Lavi gave an awkward laugh.

"You're kinda scaring Allen, _féijíchǎng_..."

"Sorry! This must be some first impression, huh?"

"Wh-who are you exactly?"

As Allen asked this, Lavi grinned and patted Medic on the head, earning a sniff and quiet murmur about 'how much he'd grown' in reply.

"This is Medic! She basically took care of me while I was here," the red head answered, fondness in his single green eye.

"And a hell of a handful you were at that," Medic said with a chuckle. Lavi pouted indignantly.

"It's nice to know you were taken care of," Allen murmured softly, smiling. "Everyone else here seems pretty horrible..."

"They're not that bad sometimes," Medic mumbled awkwardly. "They're just... severly opinionated?"

"I see..."

Both Medic and Lavi laughed at Allen's dubious expression. Then, as Lavi ruffled the other teen's hair fondly, Medic's eyes narrowed as she smirked.

"So who exactly have you fallen in love with? You don't win the bet unless she's here to see me."

Lavi froze then laughed somewhat awkwardly, even more so when Allen looked at him quizically with a frown.

"Well, uhh... that person is... Allen?" Lavi answered, blushing slightly.

Medic's smirk widened.

"Oh? Well the bet was that it had to be a _girl_ who you brought before me," the brunette stated evilly, chuckling at Lavi's annoyed expression. "Looks like I win, _baka usagi-chan_!"

"But _féijíchǎng_, that's unfair!" Lavi whined, walking up to Medic and poking her forehead in annoyance.

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not, _bakame_!"

"Is too! You're so stubborn, _féijíchǎng_..."

"I'M NOT FLAT CHESTED!"

"Oh really? Well, I certainly don't see any developments in the boob department..."

At this the brunette woman stamped her foot indignantly, cheeks flushed with embarrassment and annoyance.

"H-how dare you! Does he treat _you_ like this Allen-chan?" Medic asked, turning towards the rather baffled, and embarrassed, white haired teen standing a few metres away (for his own safety).

"Umm, n-no not really... ?" Allen replied nervously, backing away from the woman currently walking towards him with a rather creepy expression. Then, all of a sudden, Medic stopped and smiled.

"Well that's okay then!"

And with that the brunette woman sat down on her desk, smiling serenely at the both of them. Allen, who was now rather confused, turned towards Lavi with a raised eyebrow. The red head shrugged in reply.

"So..." Medic began, leaning back a little as she spoke. "Since you lost the bet _baka usagi-chan_, you have to tell me about your travels with Bookman."

Lavi laughed, rolling his eyes. Then, with a sigh, he sat down on the edge of a nearby bed and looked up at the ceiling.

He began with the day he left Headquarters, slowly and methodically describing the years since that point with an almost bored tone of voice, as if his past wasn't really all that important. As he talked, Allen listened intently; he knew next-to-nothing about his red headed friend, so to hear Lavi actually openly discuss the events of his past was something the white haired teen refused to pass up.

Some of what Lavi spoke about was quite sad, at least to Allen. The warfare he had to record as part of his duties as a Bookman, the lives lost that became simple words in ink on a piece of parchment and nothing more. Allen could tell that certain wars had affected Lavi more than others; the Dungan Revolt especially seemed to cause the red head to feel bitterness.

However, some of what was said was quite amusing, like Bookman getting drunk at a beer festival in Germany, and Lavi being forced to play the female lead in a travelling play in order for Bookman and himself to safely cross the French-Italian border.

And, in addition, some of what Lavi described was downright amazing. The variety of countries that he had visited for one: the United States of America, Canada, Mexico, South Africa, France, Switzerland, Italy, Madagascar, Japan, Germany, Russia - the list was endless. And Lavi had had the opportunity to meet with members of royal families across the globe, leaders of great armies, political masterminds. It seemed like something out of a novel. However, as Lavi told them somewhat seriously, it all came with a price.

And, as his friend talked, Allen found himself feeling somewhat concerned; throughout most of his descriptions Lavi came across as detached, almost as if it had been someone else who had watched a village of Native American Indians be burnt to the ground by an American army, someone else who had been shot by a stray bullet at the age of seven and nearly died, someone else who had witnessed the deaths of hundreds on one of the many battlefields of the Mahdist War.

But why did Lavi come across like that? Allen found himself unable to answer that question. Surely a part of Lavi had suffered and felt pain towards the bloodshed he had witnessed. He had to; he was only human.

Suddenly, however, Allen's worried thoughts and feelings for his friend were pushed to one side as Lavi described how Bookman and himself got to the Black Order.

"Well, we were basically broke at the time," Lavi explained, grinning sheepishly. "And once we got to India we knew we had to find a quicker way of getting to Paris, 'cause the Order was getting pretty impatient with how long we were taking to get there. So we asked around about getting a horse, and realised pretty quickly that we wouldn't be able to afford one. So whilst Gramps tried to persuade a peddlar to 'lend' us his one, I ended up in a game of poker with some kid wi-"

"A kid?" Medic interrupted, looking amused. Lavi laughed, cheeks flushing slightly in embarrassment.

"Yeah. I never got to see his face though; the pub was too dark to see anything but the cards really," the red head said thoughtfully, leaning against the wall behind him. "Anyway, the kid beat me hands down and cheated me of my clothes _and_ my money. I ended up getting arrested for wandering around Mumbai naked, thanks to that _bái chī_!"

"A pretty heartless kid, huh," Medic murmured.

"Tell me about it!" Lavi grumbled, crossing his arms. "And you know the worst part? The kid had the nerve to say _nolite te bastardes carborundorum_ as I left the pub stark nake-"

"W-what!"

Startled, Lavi turned to face Allen, frowning at the younger teen's shocked expression.

"Uhh Allen? You okay?" the red head asked tentatively. Allen didn't reply, blinking. Then he blinked again. Then, to be sure, blinked a third time as he tried to confirm his thought processes.

And that's when Allen started to laugh.

It had started out as small giggles at first, then progressed rather swiftly into loud hoots of laughter. Soon enough the white haired teen was clutching his stomach with one hand and wiping tears of mirth away with the other. Lavi blushed, pouting indignantly.

"It's not funny!"

Of course, Allen just laughed harder at that comment. Eventually, when both Medic and Lavi started to wonder if the boy had lost the plot completely, Allen calmed down, hiccuping and grinning.

"Care to tell us what's so amusing Allen-chan?" Medic asked, raising an eyebrow. Allen turned to face Lavi, smirking.

"On that day were you wearing a white shirt, black bandana, tight beige trousers and white underwear?"

And, rather suddenly, Lavi knew what Allen was laughing about.

"W-wh-what? It can't... I swear we never..."

"It was me, Lavi. I always quote that mock Latin phrase when I beat people."

"B-but... I would have remembered you back in Germany when..."

"It's a small world, huh?"

"YOU BASTARD!"

Allen jumped at the sudden outraged exclamation from his friend, grinning sheepishly as Lavi stood up and walked towards him.

"I had to, stupid!" Allen cried, backing away as Lavi reached forward and grabbed the collar of his jacket. "Master told me he was going to drink 20 bottles of Romanée Conti, and they cost £2000 a bot-"

"Tickle fight!"

"... Eh?"

With a sudden grin, Lavi dropped Allen back onto the bed he had been sitting on and started tickling him, soon reducing the younger teen to laughing uncontrollably and trying in vain to wriggle away from the red head. Then, with a triumphant smirk, Allen managed to get his arms free and started to tickle Lavi in revenge.

"You two are so stupid..." Medic chuckled, rolling her eyes. As the pair of them fell off of the bed, both laughing and making teasing comments, the brunette Bookman Clan member found herself smiling nonetheless. Because Lavi had changed so much since the day they had first met, almost as if he was a completely different person.

And seeing him so happy and full of joy made Medic feel very happy indeed.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Flashback - Early 1873_

"Oh would you just keep still!"

Medic scowled at the young teen sitting before her, trying her best to keep the needle in her hand straight as she continued to administer the vaccination. The blonde boy winced as she pulled the needle out of his arm, only increasing the irritation Medic felt.

"Keep this pressed against it and get out," she snapped, rolling her eyes as her patient pressed a cotton wool ball pathetically to the pinprick wound on his arm before leaving the infirmary. Medic sighed and sat down on the edge of her desk, pinching the bridge of her nose.

It had been a _very_ long day.

First of all, a group of trainee Guardians decided to have a food fight in the Cafeteria at breakfast, earning them severe beatings from Head Guardian. So, of course, it was Medic who had to deal with their injuries and their incessant whining.

Then, to top it all off, Cook got her lunch order wrong and gave her a plate full of soba. Which she hated. So Medic ended up eating cold leftover ramen after Lunch Hour was over.

And, because fate just seemed to hate her guts, Head Archiver sent her several Shepherds to inoculate against diphtheria, and all of them whined like little girls while she did so. All in all, Medic was not in the best of moods.

So, when the door to the infirmary suddenly burst open, all Medic could think was that her day was just about to get that much worse. And she was right. For the person who had just entered the infirmary was Bookman himself, and he was carrying something in a blood covered blanket. But it wasn't what he was carrying that frightened Medic; it was the emotion in Bookman's eyes.

Regret.

And in all the years she had known him, Medic had never seen or heard of Bookman regretting anything.

"B-Bookman?"

Almost as if the old man hadn't heard her, he walked forwards and placed his bloody package on the nearest bed to Medic. With a small cry, the brunette realised that Bookman had been carrying a _someone_, not a something.

For lying on the bed wide eyed and terrified was a young boy with an eye patch covering his right eye and dark red hair, though it was hard to tell if his hair really was red due to the huge amount of blood covering the boy from head to toe. His single visible green eye was glassy, as if he was in shock. And though the child was wounded, with several small slashes on his arms and a rather deep one on his neck, Medic knew that most of the blood covering the boy wasn't his own.

"Wh-what the hell is this ? !" Medic stammered, raising a hand to her mouth. "Who is this child? What happened to him?"

"I can't answer you now."

At this, Medic turned towards Bookman with a furious expression. Before she could say anything, however, the old man silenced her with a raised hand.

"Attend to his... _injuries_... I will tell you about it all later," Bookman explained, a look of regret again flashing within his eyes. "And be careful - the boy is rather shell-shocked."

And with that the old man walked away, closing the infirmary door behind him and leaving Medic alone with the silent child.

"_Guruhairu_..."

Though she honestly would rather be anywhere else, with any other patient than the one lying before her, Medic put up a professional mask to hide her horror, walked up to the bed, and kneeled down so she was at eye-level with the boy.

"Hey there," she said with a small smile, waving her right hand in front of the boy's eye. "My name's Medic. Do you understand what I'm saying to you?"

No response.

"I guess this is gonna be quite difficult then, huh..." she mumbled, standing up and getting a flannel and bowl of water from a nearby cupboard.

Placing the two items in her hands down on the bedside table, Medic checked the boy for injuries and verbally made a list of them, adopting a purely clinical countenance.

"Head wound, probably from a blunt object. Several cuts varying in depth, most on the arms and one deep one on the neck, probably from a small dagger," Medic murmured under her breath, gently pulling down the blanket still wrapped around the boy's lower half and unbuttoning the child's rather tattered shirt. "Bruising around the neck, possible attempt at strangulation. Dislocated right shoulder. 3 broken ribs. Bruising around the sto-..."

Medic froze. The sudden urge to vomit made her turn away, eyes wide and tears sliding down her cheeks.

It was now rather obvious what had happened to the boy. And all the brunette could think of to console herself with was thank God the child had lost his sanity.

Turning back around and wiping her tears away with a shaky hand, Medic picked up the flannel, drenched it with warm water, and quietly went about the task of cleaning up the boy before her, being careful of his wounds.

Soon enough, the bowl of water was a deep red colour. In fact, Medic had to change the bowl six times before the red headed child was clean. Carefully bandaging the boy up and changing him into some spare clean clothes that were far too big for him, Medic gently covered the red head with a blanket.

"You can rest now..."

Her words instilled no response, the boy's eye as wide and blank as it had been since he had entered the infirmary. Even when Medic had cleaned the cuts on his arm, head and neck with disinfectant the child hadn't even blinked nor flinched.

It unnerved her, his almost deathly cold stare. It was unwavering, unchanging, devoid of life, feeling and emotion.

Medic couldn't stand it.

With gritted teeth she prepared an injection; a sedative, one that would hopefully give the boy some peace. Without hesitation Medic slid the needle into the child's rather frail looking arm, pushing down on the plunger with a trembling thumb.

For a while nothing happened. Then, with an almost weary sigh, the boy's eyes slid shut, his face becoming peaceful as his breathing became deeper and slower. The red head looked very young in his sleep, so much so that it pained Medic to look at him.

As she sank down on the edge of a nearby bed, staring down at her shaking hands and trying not to cry, Medic knew that the sleeping child before her was beyond saving. And in a cruel way she was glad.

Because any shred of sanity that the boy had left wouldn't be _worth_ saving.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Who on Earth do you think you are ? !"

Bookman remained passive towards the anger being directed towards him, eyes emotionless, face expressionless. He ignored everything said to him and waited until all was silent before speaking.

"You asked me to pick a successor. I have chosen the best candidate I have seen so far."

"Best candidate?" Clan Head echoed incredulously. "That child is nothing more than an orphaned street urchin that would be better off dead than continuing to live such a miserable life!"

"You would have done it good to have left it where you found it," Chief Translator said, his tone contemptuous. "He is clearly not mentally sane-"

"Agreed."

"-and he is far too young to be able to become a Bookman-"

"Agreed."

"-and, most importantly, he is not of Clan blood."

"Agreed."

"So why," Clan Head asked, frowning at his brother's replies. "Have you brought him here and asked for him to be your apprentice?"

"Because he is the only one who can be my successor. That is why."

"We don't do wishy-washy answers, Bookman," Guardian Head growled, anger in his eyes. "Do you mean to make a mockery out of the Clan?"

"Of course not," Bookman replied, meeting the gaze of the Council members without any indication of doubt in his eyes. "I just know when I have found the right person."

"Like you did with your previous apprentice?"

Bookman fell silent.

"You made a mistake by choosing him - did he not ruin your chances of continuing to document the Noah Clan? And he also ended up becoming an _accommodator_ of all things!" Clan Head murmured disapprovingly, shaking his head. "He died a coward's death."

"He died at the hands of the Akuma - no more, no less," Bookman replied, his tone becoming ever so slightly angry. "He was chosen by the Innocence and he had no other choice."

"He could have rejected it."

"And then he would have turned into a Fallen One."

The room was quiet for a while. Then, with a sigh, Clan Head stood up and walked up to Bookman, stopping just in front of him.

"We will give you one chance, and one chance only," he explained, voice grave and very serious. "In four month's time you will bring that child before us to be judged."

"Thank you, Your Gra-"

"But be warned, Bookman," Clan Head interrupted, smirking. "If it isn't mentally stable in that time, we will have to Erase it."

And with that the Guardian by the door opened it at Clan Head's request. Knowing that the meeting was over, Bookman bowed his head in acknowledgement and turned to leave.

It was going to be a rough couple of months.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Stop!"

Running footsteps. Exhausted pants for breath. The faint rustle of fabric. These sounds echoed round the main corridor as a red headed boy ran as fast as his legs could carry him towards the exit.

_There's nowhere to run, Hóng sè._

"No!"

The boy ran faster, eye wide and full of panic. His surroundings started to fade out. Suddenly, he wasn't at Bookman Headquarters anymore. He was at Home. And _he_ was chasing him.

"Leave me alone!"

The child practically screamed those words, an all-encompassing fear filling him from head to toe. He wasn't going to make it; the footsteps were right behind him. The red head put on one last burst of speed, hoping to evade both his fake assailant, and the ones actually chasing him.

But, just as the large double doors came into view, the Guardians pursuing the boy grabbed onto the back of his t-shirt, dragging him kicking and screaming to the ground.

_Caught you now, Hóng sè!_

"Would you stop screaming, you damn _jiànhuò_!"

"Tie him up! Quickly!"

"N-no... _qǐng_! I don't want-"

_Now it's time for you to make your choice._

"Gahh, h-he punched me! _Wāng bā_!"

_Live or die?_

"LET GO OF ME!"

"Call Bookman, someone!"

_You know what will happen if you choose to live, don't you?_

"Stop."

_I wonder..._

"Stop!"

_Will you scream for me, Hóng sè?_

"STOP!"

"What on Earth is going on here?"

Standing with a concerned expression a few metres away was Bookman, eyes marginally wider. In front of him were 4 Guardians, pinned under them the young red head under Bookman's care. The boy was crying, his single green eye wide open and full of a terror so extreme that Bookman had to avert his gaze. The child was repeating 'stop' to himself over and over again, even though the Guardians were doing nothing but restraining him.

He was hallucinating. Again.

It had been just over three months since Bookman had brought the young red headed boy to Headquarters. He had been catatonic for the better part of it, and in fact had only gained his speech back and a little bit of his sanity, somewhat, just under two weeks previously.

Medic had been overjoyed when the boy first spoke, quietly asking why he wasn't at home and where his mother was. So it made it all the more heart-breaking for her when Bookman informed the boy that he could not go home, and that his mother was dead.

Now, Bookman was not one for emotion. He was a Bookman, after all. Expressionless. Emotionless. Objective. A Bookman could not be biased, so that he could record the hidden history of the world without twisting the facts or manipulating the truth. So why, Bookman found him asking himself, did his heart hurt to see the young red head break down and cry as he remembered the events that occurred the day his mother died? And why did he feel regret that the boy was now bordering on being psychotic and hallucinating so much so that he doubted the child would ever recover from his insanity?

Because he could have saved him. That's why.

If he had been only a few minutes earlier, a few hours earlier even, he could have stopped everything from happening. The boy would still have a mother, and he would still have his sanity.

But Bookmen aren't meant to get involved. They're meant to stand on the side-lines and simply observe as events occur.

And this juxtaposition of human nature versus the duties of the Bookman Clan was a conflict that all Bookmen had to carry until the day they died.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

To say he failed the test given to him by the Council was an understatement.

The young boy had spent most of the meeting in complete silence, staring down at his small leather shoes and completely ignoring the 12 men standing before him. When they asked him questions, he did not answer. When they shouted at him, he acted as if there was no-one even in the room with him. He was in a world of his own, and he even started humming as the meeting started to near its end.

Oddly enough, Bookman did not feel any anger towards the boy whatsoever. Instead, he blamed himself for not doing more to help the child become more mentally stable. Bookman had tried everything, but nothing had worked. The boy still kept hallucinating and fading out of reality, and he also seemed convinced when he _was_ situated in the real world that his mother was still waiting for him at home.

"You've failed us, Bookman," Clan Head muttered, glaring at both his brother and the red headed boy standing before him. "That child will never be accepted by this Clan."

"I just need more time," Bookman replied, coming across as both passive and slightly pleading, eyes downcast.

"No. He will be Erased tomorrow, and that is the end of it."

"What does 'Erased' mean?"

The 13 men in the room all turned and stared at the boy who had just spoken. The red head's expression was both innocent and guarded, and for a brief moment seemed more like the sort of person he had been before That Day, as Bookman had heard the boy refer to it as.

"It is none of your concern," came the almost flippant reply from the Clan Head. "You were given no permission to speak, brat, so keep your mouth shut."

The boy did not reply. Sighing, Bookman looked up and met his brother's eyes.

"I only ask for one more month."

"I cannot give you that time, Bookman. Cease your arguing."

"You can and will, _Your Grace_."

"My mind will not waver! Cease at once, or so help me I'll ha-!"

"There is someone I know who can bring his sanity back."

At these words the 12 Council members fell silent, eyes narrowed. Curious, the Guardian Head leant forward in his chair.

"Is that so? And who is this person?" he questioned, smirking a little. Bookman remained passive, eyes glinting in the dim candlelight.

"A member of the Noah Clan."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Cafeteria was bustling with activity as Lavi and Allen sat down to eat, the former holding a single plate of spaghetti bolognaise and the latter holding a rather precarious pile of plates chock full of a variety of foods. The other people in the hall all turned to stare as the pair of them found an empty table and sat down, especially at Allen. The atmosphere became pretty awkward pretty quickly.

Luckily for them however a young Shephard, dressed in the typical grey colour of his trade, tripped over and knocked down an Archiver, spilling the older man's soup everywhere in the process. A fight then ensued between the Shephard and the Archiver, conveniently diverting the entire hall's attention away from the two Exorcists.

"Nice timing," Lavi murmured, trying not to smirk as he began eating his pasta. By this point Allen had already gotten through half of his food.

Unlike the white haired boy sitting opposite him, the red headed Bookman took his time with his meal, enjoying the warmth slowly spreading through his body as he ate. He still felt a little unsettled though, despite feeling a hell of a lot better than he had done earlier. He would much rather be at Black Order Headquarters eating Jerry's food.

However, having Allen with him, slurping up his food as if it was water whilst smiling contentedly, and knowing that Bookman was probably smoking and reading some archives a floor or two below them whilst pissing Head Archiver off in the process, and seeing Medic again after so much time apart - all of it dimmed Lavi's anger and discomfort, making him feel calmer and more in control of his emotions.

"Ahh, all done ~ !"

Patting his stomach with a sated expression, Allen leant back a little and looked around the Cafeteria, silver eyes observing what was occurring in various places around the hall curiously. Then, turning around towards Lavi and tilting his head, Allen waited until the red head had finished eating before opening his mouth to speak.

"Lavi?"

"Yes, Allen?"

"How is the Bookman Clan structured?"

At this, Lavi raised an eyebrow and put down his fork.

"Why do ya wanna know?" he asked, his tone of voice laced with curiousity. Allen chuckled a little in reply.

"It just seems as if certain people are all dressed the same, like they're in some kind of uniform," the white haired teen said, resting his head in the palm of one hand. "Is it similar to the Order?"

"I guess so," Lavi replied with a laugh, pulling his bandana down off his forehead and running his fingers through his hair. "Well, there's the Bookmen of course - there's only me and the stupid panda though."

"Why's that?"

"There can only be one Bookman and one Bookman Junior - that's how it's always been."

"Oh... Well, what about everyone else?"

"Hmm... There's the Archivers, who wear brown and work downstairs, making sure all the records are in order and properly preserved. And then there's the Students, who wear navy, and they're all studying to become proper members of the Clan. Oh, and the Teachers wear white by the way. Then there's the Shepherds. They're kinda like Finders, I guess, except they find places of historical interest instead of Innocence."

"And what do the Shepherds wear?"

"Grey."

"Ahh, so it was a Shepherd who knocked that man's soup over!"

At this Lavi laughed, single eye filled with amusement.

"So, who are the ones dressed in black?" Allen asked, looking inquisitive. Lavi seemed to find this inquisitiveness quite adorable for some reason, and made a mental note to make Allen more curious about things in the future.

"They're Guardians, and their job is to keep people in order within Headquarters and in some of the nearby towns and villages too."

"So they're kind of like Exorcists in a way?"

"I guess... They use their power for their own means a lot of the time though."

"Oh... so more like officers from Central then?"

"Probably! Except minus the obsession with Lvellie."

Both of them laughed then, for a while, Lavi and Allen sat in amiable silence, staring off into space. Then eventually their eyes met, and both of them smiled.

"So, what do ya wanna do for the rest of the day?" Lavi asked, stretching a little.

"Hmm... well Bookman will probably need help with the poems, right? We should go and see where he is. And Link's still gone as well..." Allen replied, looking contemplative. Lavi pouted, expression downcast.

"But that's boring, beansprout!"

"The name's Allen!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Lavi grumbled. "Why can't we go bother _féijíchǎng_ instead?"

"We've bothered her enough already, I'm sure," Allen answered stubbornly, poking the older teen's forehead with a gloved hand.

"And you shall go bother her some more!"

Both boys jumped. Standing behind them, with a cup of green tea in his hands, was Bookman. The old man glared at Lavi vehemently, making the red head wince.

"I have already started working on the poems, and do not wish either of you to distract me," Bookman said flippantly. "And as for _you_, brat, I do not wish to see you until you have learnt some manners and respect for your elders!"

"But Gramps, he deserved it!"

With a loud thwack Bookman hit Lavi on the top of his head with a fist, slamming the teen's face straight into the empty plate on the table before him. Allen winced.

"OWWW! Damn _lǎo bù sǐde_, what was that for ? !" Lavi snapped, standing up and glaring at the old man. Bookman scowled in reply, pointing towards the exit leading out of the Cafeteria. With a resigned sigh and muttering under his breath as he went, Lavi walked towards the exit with Allen in tow, leaving the old man to drink his tea in as much peace as he could have amongst all the hustle and bustle within the hall.

Deciding to go bother Medic since they really had nowhere else to go, Lavi and Allen headed down the busy main corridor, went up the stairs that were just before the first set of dormitory rooms, and soon found themselves standing outside of the infirmary door. Pushing it open, they found the room to be completely empty.

"Oh..." Lavi said, disappointed. "Where is she?"

Looking around in case she was simply in the store room or hidden from view behind one of the many screens situated around the beds, the two Exorcists found nothing but a grey furred hamster, which was randomly nibbling on a piece of parchment on Medic's desk. Upon seeing it, Lavi gave a delighted cry.

"Ahhh it's the hamster that _féijíchǎng_ takes care of!" he exclaimed, picking the small furry animal up and cuddling it. The hamster bit Lavi's hand in return.

"I don't think it likes you," Allen said with amusement, gently stroking the top of the hamster's head with a finger. It decided that it didn't like Allen either, and bit his finger too. Both Exorcists' pouted.

"I forgot about its temper," Lavi grumbled, sucking on his now-bleeding ring finger. "Stupid fuzzball..."

Upon observing the hamster closer, Allen noticed that it had a curious marking on its chest that looked oddly like a tattoo. Then he smirked.

"Hey, don't you think it looks kind of like Kanda?" Allen asked.

"Holy crap, it does!" Lavi answered, laughing. "We should call it Yuu then!"

So the hamster from that moment onwards was called Yuu, though the real Yuu was completely unaware that a hamster had just been named after him. At that present moment he was trying to eat his evening soba whilst Komui and Reever tried to strangle each other with bits of spaghetti.

"Hey, Yuu was eating a note!" Allen exclaimed, shoving the hamster off of the piece of paper (and showing it as much courtesy as he would the real Kanda), holding it up to read it. It said:

_To baka usagi-chan and Allen-chan,_

_I'm running low on a few things, so I've gone to town to buy some stuff. I'll be back in a few hours though, so no using my petroleum jelly for 'creative' purposes unless you want me to end up interrupting you, ahaha._

_Ja ne! Medic xx_

"Ahh, so she's just gone shopping," Allen murmured, handing the note to Lavi. The red head read it, then tucked it inside his jacket pocket with a nod.

"I guess we're just gonna have to wait, huh..."

For a while the both of them were silent. Then, almost simultaneously, they realised what Medic meant by 'creative' purposes.

"J-just to clarify, I have no idea where she even keeps that stuff!" Lavi stammered, cheeks flushed with embarrasment as he raised his hands defensively.

"A-and I'm allergic to it anyway, so we wouldn't have been able to do s-something like that!" came the equally embarrassed reply from Allen.

"Yeah! ... Wait, you're allergic to petroleum jelly?"

"Yeah... It makes my skin turn all spotty and itchy."

"Man, that sucks..."

"..."

"..."

"... Well, this is awkward..."

"Yep..."

For a while the two of them were silent, both looking embarrassed and rather awkward. The physical aspects of their relationship, shall we say, had never really come to mind before. Both Lavi and Allen had just about accepted that there was something more than friendship between them, never mind considering what that entailed exactly.

So Lavi found himself wondering, as he stood in silence and idly perused through a few medical textbooks, if he even _wanted_ such things from Allen. And upon getting a mental image of being 'creative' with him, as Medic had so put it, Lavi whacked his head rather hard with the book he had been reading.

There was a time and a place for such things. And Lavi decided that imagining doing things of a somewhat sexual nature with the person currently in the same room as himself was a _very_ bad idea.

"So..." Allen began, raising an eyebrow at the now red-faced Lavi, who had his face literally buried in a book. "What are we going to do now?"

"Uhhh... I don't really know..." Lavi said with a somewhat muffled voice, still not raising his head.

"Well that's helpful," Allen grumbled. After a few more minutes of awkward silence in which Lavi went to go check out the store room (to hide his embarrassment no doubt), the white haired teen suddenly noticed a list taped to a nearby headboard. It had at least ten things written down on it, and it had the words 'Go and buy on Wednesday 7th' which was the current date.

"I think Medic's forgotten her list of things to buy," he commented, walking forwards and pulling the slip of paper off of the headboard into his hands. "We should go find her and give her the list."

"Okay," Lavi answered after a while, still looking awkward as he walked back into the infirmary and stood before Allen. "There are a few villages nearby, so we should check all of them."

"Got it!"

Just as Allen headed towards the door, with Lavi following close behind him, the white haired teen suddenly froze, smirking.

"Lavi?"

"Y-yes?"

"You do realise that I wasn't joking when I said that I'm allergic to that stuff."

Lavi's jaw dropped. Smirk widening, Allen turned around and took out the small pot of petroleum jelly that the red head had tried to sneakily tuck into his trouser pocket without Allen noticing. Said red head pouted.

"And to think I thought of you as unobservant..." Lavi mumbled, snatching the pot from the younger teen and shoving it inside a nearby box, pushing past Allen out of the door. The white haired Exorcist laughed.

"I'm only observant when I need to be, stupid."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Link was pissed off.

For a supposedly logical and intelligent group of people, one would think that there would be more than one phone in the entire building. But, instead, there was only one. And it was currently out of order. And Link had spent almost three hours looking for the damn thing.

"How on Earth am I going to reach Central now?" Link murmured angrily, slamming the dead phone on the table in front of him. Pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing exasperatedly, Link found himself wondering why on Earth he hadn't been more concerned when his golem got broken on the way up the mountain.

Suddenly, he heard approaching footsteps and two voices that he didn't recognise. Narrowing his eyes, Link hid behind a nearby statue of Charles I and watched as two men dressed in black entered the hall and stopped a few metres away from him.

"Man, I'm beat! How much longer is our shift?"

"About an hour."

"Ahh good! We can go bother Cook for some food afterwards, that okay?"

"Sure, why not."

For a while both men were silent. Then one of them, who had short blonde hair and a scar across his left cheek, turned towards his companion with a contemplative expression.

"Have you heard yet? About Bookman coming back?"

"Yeah," the other man replied, running a hand through his shoulder length brunette hair. "I heard it's something to do with the war those Exorcists are fighting in."

"Well what _I_ heard is that he apparently came back because he needed to check in with his apprentice. Ya know, the whole 12 year thing."

"Bookman has an apprentice ? !"

"Of course, stupid! He's gettin' pretty old now. His apprentice is the red headed one."

Silence. Then the brunette frowned.

"But isn't the red head an Exorcist? Same with the white haired kid?"

"Well, yeah. Bookman's currently logging the Black Order so he and his apprentice are gonna have to be Exorcists."

"I see..."

"... Hey, have you heard the back-story on that red headed guy?"

"No. Because I'm not nosy."

"Oi, that's harsh! As Guardians we always hear gossip don't we!"

"Sure, whatever."

The blonde Guardian pouted.

"Well if you wanna know, his past is mega screwed up."

"And?"

"His mother was a prostitute."

"And ? !"

"And he was mentally insane for a while."

"AND ? !"

"And he killed the man who was like a father to him. At least that's what I heard."

Link froze at that, eyes widening. Lavi killed his father figure? The blonde CROW leant in closer, full of curiosity to find out more.

"It's probably not true, you idiot. That guy became Bookman's apprentice when he was, what, six? There's no way he could have killed a grown man, never mind the guy who was like his father, at that age."

"Ohh, so you _have_ heard a few things then!"

At this the brunette Guardian started arguing indignantly with his companion. Neither noticed as Link snuck out of the hall and into the corridor outside.

This was all very interesting, Link thought as he walked down the passage towards the lift, which was about a 5 minutes walk away. The red headed teen must hide a lot under the masks that all Bookmen had to adopt, and Link found himself wanting to figure out exactly _what_ Lavi was hiding.

Suddenly, Link heard footsteps approaching behind him. He turned around, senses wary. Then he sighed as he saw that it was only Lavi and Allen coming to greet him. Link narrowed his eyes at the red head standing before him.

"What ya doin' down here, Two Spot?" Lavi asked, acting oblivious towards the distrust he saw in the CROW's eyes when he in actuality made a mental note of it.

"I was looking for a phone," came the almost flippant reply. "Seems the only one in the entire building is broken however."

"Well we're just heading out to some of the local villages to find Medic," Allen said, smiling a little. "You can come with us to find a phone, if you wish."

At this Link's eyes widened a little, wondering why the white haired teen would actually ask for his company. Lavi seemed just as confused.

"Okay then, I will," Link murmured after a while. Allen smiled.

"Then let's get going, shall we?"

So the three of them headed towards the lift with Allen feeling happy to get out of the building and get some fresh air, Link feeling guilty about misjudging Allen's character, and Lavi wondering exactly why Link had given him such a distasteful look.

Because even though Lavi wore masks, so did Link, and the red head knew that the CROW was hiding something. And he was going to find out what it was.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- féijíchǎng = flat chested (mandarin chinese)

- baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (japanese)

- bakame = bloody idiot (japanese)

- bái chī = idiot (mandarin chinese)

- nolite te bastardes carborundorum = don't let the bastards grind you down (mock latin)

- guruhairu = a sort of phrase used to indicate frustration and just general bad feelings ^^" (japanese)

- Hóng sè = Red. This is what Lavi was called when he was a child (so pre-Bookman HQ) (mandarin chinese)

- jiànhuò = despicable creature (mandarin chinese)

- qǐng = please (mandarin chinese)

- wāng bā = bastard (mandarin chinese)

- lǎo bù sǐde = literally means 'an old man who just won't die' XD (mandarin chinese)

- ja ne = see ya (japanese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**So there's chapter 7 ^^ By the way, in the flashback where Lavi's running away from the Guardians the sentences written entirely in italics were part of Lavi's hallucination. Oh and Lavi's full past, I can confirm, will be in the next chapter. Be prepared, 'cause it sure as hell ain't pretty -.-" ANYhoo - review replies (because ff . net still hates me *goes to emo corner*):**

**- Geeres = I'm in need of one of your hugs, moyashi-chan *slumps* Why does everything hate me right now? -.-"**

**- Stavarn100 - I quite agree ;3 And thank you *smiles* Oh, and as for your oneshot, I have major plot block with it atm *flees* Sorry :'S It'll get done soon, I promise! Hopefully I'll get some inspiration soon...**

**- kh07gl = Your reviews always make me smile ^3^ And yeay for flat-chest! She's swiftly becoming one of my favourites to write, and I'm surprised - I've never really liked OCs in fics... Well, who knows XD**

**- bakaxusagi = Aww I hope you get out of your writer's block soon! I look forward to seeing Allen and Lavi properly meeting for the first time :'3 And thank you so much for your compliments *blushes* I'm glad you think Lavi's IC, and that you like Medic-chan ~ And I had so much fun looking up wars between 1874 and 1884, especially with the persona names :D Thanks again ~**

**- patrick the almighty observer = I think you pronounce it "ka-oh nee chu-chong shi-bah di-ee" but I'm not sure ^^" Apparently its an actual insult used over there, and one that will probably get you into a fight too XD And I've always wanted to write his past for that reason - I wanna try and justify how he acts in my head canon *laughs***

**- MidnightAbyssx02 = Hey, I have no problem with you being Anti Lena *smiles* Everyone's got their preferences, right? And as to who's the Heart, well, you'll find out at some point ;'3 I've been leaving clues already, ya know *grins***

**Thanks for the reviews, and I hope to update in about a week's time. Love you all :'3**

**xrowa-chanx**


	8. Chapter 8: A Hope Once Had

**Hey everyone :'3 Gahh I hate being ill so much -.-" And I've broken my lent already... **

**Anyhoo, thank you to Anactolica, patrick the almighty observer, kh07gl, Geeres, Stavarn100, Hanashi no iu, animeobsessed001, MidnightAbyssx02, Foschidelic Reika, Pharaohyamifan, xxHinaAngelxx, Pajamaly, SkullMate, Lingering Sorrow and WhiteAngel128 for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing. I love you all :'D Review replies are at the end.**

**WARNING: This chapter is gonna have some pretty extreme content (and not in a sexual way before you start drooling, fangirls) - you have been warned ^^"**

**Oh, and as a child Lavi was known as Hóng sè, which is Mandarin for Red. Note: This isn't his real name - it's an alias. Enjoy chapter 8, everyone! It's another long one ~ :'D**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_I settle down a twisted up frown disguised as a smile,_

_Well, you would have never known._

_I had it all but not what I wanted,_

_'Cause hope for me was a place uncharted and overgrown._

_You make your way in._

_I resist you just like this._

_You can't tell me to feel._

_The truth never set me free so I did it myself._

Paramore - Careful

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 8 - A Hope Once Had

"Are you sure you haven't seen her?"

"Pretty sure, kid. Sorry I can't be of any help."

Allen sighed. They had been looking for Medic for nearly an hour with no luck. This was the third village that they had searched, and nearly the 20th medicinal shop that they had been in. And Medic hadn't been in any of them.

"Where do we go from here?" Allen asked, turning towards Lavi with a frown. The red head sighed and adjusted his bandana with a scowl.

"There's only one more village in this area of the mountains," he explained, stretching a little. "So _féijíchǎng_ has to be either there or back at Headquarters. I doubt she would have gone further afield."

"So we will check out this village then find a phone?" Link asked irritably, arms folded. Both Lavi and Allen sighed exasperatedly; the CROW had been getting more and more annoyed the longer they spent looking for Medic (for Lavi refused to let Link phone Central before they gave Medic her shopping list, much to the CROW's displeasure).

"Yes yes, Two Spot, we'll find you a phone," Lavi replied, trying not to appear too irritated by the blonde. "The next village is only about ten minutes away."

So, waving goodbye to the shopkeeper who had been unable to help them, the trio set out and left the small village to head to the next one. They took a uneven rocky path northwards through a small wood, the crisp mountain air making them pull their cloaks tighter around them. It was peacefully quiet, and Allen soon found all irritation towards their unfruitful search fade away as they walked.

"So, Bookman Junior, did you used to live around here? You seem to know the area rather well," Link asked, turning towards Lavi as he walked with slightly narrowed eyes. Though he hid it rather well, the red head winced ever so slightly and gave Link an almost strained smile.

"I did, yeah, but I can't really remember where exactly - it was a long time ago," he replied, not bothering to turn towards the blonde as he spoke. Link frowned, doubting Lavi's words. Deciding to drop the subject, the CROW turned away from Lavi and faced forwards. Allen said nothing.

Soon enough they reached the next village, which seemed almost identical to the last one they had been in. There was only a handful of small huts, about two dozen or so, with a well and a small shrine for Buddha marking the centre of the settlement. Being able to read the signs situated above some of the huts since they were written in Mandarin, which Lavi knew intimately, the red head spotted the apothecary towards the easternmost end of the village.

"It's this way!"

Following behind, Allen and Link headed towards the small hut and entered it after Lavi, the smell of incense hitting them instantly. They heard a jangling sound as the door opened, and an old woman with greying hair and a weathered face stepped forwards and bowed her head respectively.

"_Wǔān. Wǒ néng bāng nǐ ma_?" she asked, voice hoarse. Lavi bowed his head and smiled.

"_Bāng yī xià máng_? We're looking for someone."

The old woman nodded, smiling a little.

"Of course. What does this person look like?"

"Female, late twenties, kinda small in height, brunette, should have her hair tied up in a bun, pale lilac uniform?"

"Ahh, I have seen the woman you speak of!"

At this, Lavi and Allen both turned towards each other and grinned. Happy to have finally heard some news on Medic, Lavi turned to face the shopkeeper again.

"Do you know where she's gone?" he asked, smiling. The old woman nodded.

"She came here for some aspirin, but I do not sell many western drugs and I have none left in stock," she explained. "So she told me she was going to go to the town to the north of here, on the other side of the river."

Lavi's heart skipped a beat. For a while he didn't answer then, with what could only be called a grimace, he bowed his head.

"_Xiè xiè_!"

And, before the woman could even speak, the red head left the shop, dragging Allen and Link with him. It was only when they had left the village and were standing under the shelter of a large tree that Lavi stopped.

"What's wrong?" Allen asked, concerned. The Bookman was shaking slightly, skin visibly paler, eye slightly wider. As Allen asked this, Lavi sighed and gave him a small smile.

"Nothing to worry about. It's too late to go search for Medic so let's go back to He-"

"We're going to that town, Bookman."

Lavi jumped a little, turning towards Link with a sudden anger rising within his green eye.

"Oh? Is that so?" he demanded whilst clenching his fists slightly. Link's eyes narrowed.

"I still need to find a phone, or had you conveniently forgotten?" the CROW answered. "Is there something you are running from, Bookman Junior?"

Lavi said nothing.

"You don't have to phone Central so soon, do you?" Allen asked, standing between the two of them in case it came to blows. "We can try and use the phone at Bookman Headquarters tomorrow."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, Walker," Link replied curtly. "Central will suspect something if I do not inform them of our arrival immediately."

"Can you not tell them that we had communication problems?" Allen countered.

"No. Unless our _good friend_ here gives us a very good reason why we should not go to this town, we are g-"

"Fine, we'll go."

Both Link and Allen fell silent, turning towards Lavi. He looked defeated almost, torn between explaining and remaining silent, looking down at the muddy path beneath his feet.

"Lavi... are you sure?" Allen asked quietly, ducking a little so he could meet the red head's gaze. Said red head smiled a little at the younger teen, nodding. Link sighed exasperatedly.

"Let's go."

And so they headed off, Lavi in the lead with Allen by his side and Link following close behind. The path they were taking led in a straight line, pretty much, to the town, their only obstacle being the river that ran straight across the pathway. As they walked, however, Lavi soon found himself wondering why the hell he caved in.

Every cell in his body was screaming at him to turn back. It took all his willpower to keep walking and not head back the way they came. The cons outweighed the pros in his opinion and, the closer they got to the town, Lavi began to feel more and more uneasy, like he had done when they had arrived at Bookman Headquarters earlier on that day.

_He_ was stirring again, and memories came unbidden - his mother smiling, the sun rising over distant mountain tops, warm embraces before bedtime, the smell of cinnamon, clamorous voices as drinks were served and men were satisfied, Bookman playing Mahjong with him, Motoki. Blood. Pain. His own screams echoing with no-one coming to help. Sadistic laughter. The sickening sound of metal sliding into flesh. More blood, all over him this time. And those words. Those three. Damn. Words.

_Who are you?_

Lavi's vision swam, his surroundings becoming blurry, a horrible tugging at his consciousness making him stagger a little. Yet he kept walking.

However, when they finally reached the river, which was about halfway from the town, the red head stopped and sat down as a sudden wave of dizziness and nausea hit him like a punch to the stomach. Allen was by his side instantly.

"Are you okay?" he asked, placing a firm hand on Lavi's back in case he fell over. The older teen was on the verge of hyperventilating, eye glassy, sweat dripping down the side of his face. Taking a few deep breaths, Lavi nodded and rested his head on his knees with a sigh.

"What on Earth is the matter with you?" Link demanded, putting his hands on his hips. "Have you fallen ill?"

With a chuckle Lavi shook his head.

"Nah, I'm fine Two Spot. I just need a minute," the red head murmured, sitting back up and running a hand through his hair.

"Are you sure?"

As Allen asked this, his voice etched with concern and worry, Lavi looked up and gave the boy a small heartfelt smile, but one that showed both gratitude and pain. And, oddly enough, worry too.

"I'm fine, Allen. Seriously," he replied. "I just…"

"What?"

"We're going to my hometown."

"Isn't that a good thing?"

At this, Lavi laughed bitterly.

"No. It isn't a good thing at all."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Bookman Clan Library was quiet, peaceful almost. There was no-one else but Bookman and Librarian there, the tables empty, the corridors between bookcases deserted.

Just the way Bookman liked it.

"Do you need anything else?"

Looking up from the masses of scrolls that he had been reading, Bookman shook his head. Librarian smiled and let him be, walking off towards her desk. The old man sighed and returned to his work.

Before him were copies of the poems that they had found, as well as a copy of the map they had found in the temple in Khajuraho. He hadn't been allowed to bring the originals with him, but he had carbon copies of them so it wasn't a major issue.

He had made a few notes since he had started, but hadn't got much further in decoding them. The first one that they had found was simple meaning wise, but Bookman got the feeling that there was something big that he was missing. The second poem that they had found, about being in two parts and a person being no more, was also causing him trouble.

"What am I missing?" Bookman asked himself, leaning back in his chair and sighing a little.

Looking back down at the first poem, deciding that he should start with the one they discovered first and progress from there, Bookman held up the scroll that showed the first poem.

23 8 5 14 20 8 5 13 21 19 9 3 15 6 2 19 20 18 15 25 5 18,

16 12 1 25 19 5 15 18 1 12 12 20 1 18,

1 14 4 2 14 7 15 6 1 20 8 15 21 19 1 14 4 25 5 1 18 19,

7 9 22 5 19 2 1 3 11 23 8 1 20 23 5 8 15 1 18,

6 15 21 18 20 5 5 14 23 9 12 1 15 13 5 15 14 5,

15 14 5 23 9 12 1 15 13 5 15 14 5 - 8 21 14 4 18 5 4 1 14 4 14 9 14 5,

1 14 4 1 12 12 23 9 12 12 6 1 12 12,

1 14 4 18 5 20 21 18 14 20 15 19 15 13 5 20 8 9 14 7 13 15 18 5.

_When the music of the destroyer,_

_Plays for all to hear,_

_And the being of a thousand years,_

_Gives back what we hold dear,_

_14 will become 1,_

_1 will become 109,_

_And all will fall,_

_And return to something more._

He just couldn't figure out why it had been coded in numbers that were so easy to figure out. Surely if whoever had written the poem hadn't wanted people to be able to read it, or at least make it hard for them to figure out what the poem said, they would have coded it in a more difficult fashion. So why? Why was it written in such a way? And why were the words 'the Noah' and 'the Heart' written on the outside of both poems? What did they signify?

Deciding that smoking may help him think better, Bookman took out his pipe from his coat pocket, lit it with a match, and inhaled deeply. The nicotine soon worked its magic, and the frustration that the old man had been feeling soon faded, replaced by clarity of thought. And it was at this time, as Bookman blew out a cloud of smoke and tried not to smirk as Librarian gave him a dirty look for smoking, that something hit him.

Both poems and the clue were found in places of historical importance.

Bookman would have slapped himself if he had been alone. How could he not have realised ? !

"I'm getting old," he murmured, putting down his pipe and rubbing his temples irritably.

The first poem had been found in the birth place of Saint Vincent de Paul. The first clue was found in one of the biggest Hindu temples in India, that was several centuries old and probably dated around the 11th century. The second poem was found in one of the eldest churches in Britain also. Leaning forward eagerly, Bookman looked over the poems again.

"The numbers must mean something…"

Picking up the copy of the first poem, Bookman read over the numbers. Maybe the meaning of the poem wasn't in decoding it, but what the numbers signified. Swiftly, the old man got a blank scroll of parchment from a nearby desk and laid it out next to the poem, taking the lid off of a bottle of ink and dipping a brush inside. Then, on the blank scroll, Bookman copied out the numbers exactly, making sure to underline the numbers that were underlined on the original as well. Then, beside the numbers, he noted down the years that the three historical places were built or when they became historically important. For the village of Saint-Vincent-de-Paul, 1580; the year St. Vincent de Paul was born there. For the Kandariya Mahadeva Temple, 1020; the year the temple was finally completed. For Bath Abbey, 1405; the year that it was fully built.

Noting down these numbers, Bookman spent a good few minutes in contemplative thought. After 20 minutes with no success, the old man got up and went to the Cafeteria to get a cup of green tea. Half an hour later he was back and, with a slight sigh, he sat back down and looked at the scroll again. There had to be a connection between the numbers in which the poem was coded and the years that the three sites became historically important. Again, another twenty minutes passed.

"What am I not understanding?" he asked himself, frowning.

And, oddly enough, Bookman found himself wishing that he hadn't banished his apprentice elsewhere; Lavi's love of numbers would probably be of more help than he would like to admit.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

This was turning into a disaster.

Not only was there no aspirin in stock in every store that she had visited so far, Medic had now forgotten the rest of the things on her list that she needed to buy. Great.

"Now what am I gonna do ? !" She cried, sitting down on a nearby bench and slumping. She couldn't really afford to come back the next day; she was already on a short enough time limit as it was, and she knew that she wouldn't have the time to go and restock anytime soon.

Deciding that moping wasn't really going to get her anywhere, Medic decided to find a local tea shop and calm down with a nice hot steaming mug of black tea. So, standing up, Medic walked out of the park that she had been in and headed towards the nearest café. Soon enough, once she had managed to escape from a group of street children begging her to buy their 'homemade' cakes, Medic reached the tea shop and quickly grabbed a table in a far corner of the room.

"_Wǔān. Wǒ néng bāng nǐ ma?_" a waitress asked, smiling and tucking a strand of dark brunette hair behind her ear as she spoke. Medic smiled in return.

"_Konnichiwa_," she replied, indicating that she spoke Japanese and not Mandarin. "I'd like a cup of black tea please, with 2 sugars."

For a brief moment a look of contempt passed through the waitress's eyes. Then, with a forced smile, she muttered that her order would be ready soon and walked away. Medic rolled her eyes and sighed; relations between the Chinese and the Japanese were only getting worse as time passed instead of better.

As she waited for her drink, idly looking out the window towards the somewhat shabby street outside, Medic found herself thinking back on the arrival of the 3 Exorcists and CROW at Bookman Clan Headquarters, and what they had actually come to Headquarters for. Briefly before she had left, Bookman had paid her a visit. He hadn't changed at all since they had last met, still being as blunt and apathetic as he usually was. Though he refused to call it catching up, the old man informed her of his travels with Lavi, though not in as much detail as the red head had given and leaving out all of the amusing incidents, and finally told her of what he and his apprentice had been logging while working as Exorcists at the Black Order.

Medic had heard of the establishment before but had only met Exorcists on one occasion a few years after Lavi and Bookman had left Headquarters. So she listened intently as Bookman talked, finding great interest in what he said about Allen especially. When the old man raised his concerns that Lavi was getting too attached to his comrades and that he wished in a way that they could move on, but knowing that they would be in this war until it finished, Medic remained silent – she got the feeling that Bookman would not be especially pleased if he found out about how close Lavi actually was to Allen, though she did not know why. Though a member of the Bookman Clan, she actually knew next-to-nothing about what being a Bookman actually meant – it was kept a secret, known only by the current Bookman, his apprentice, and the Council.

Unfortunately for Bookman, Medic couldn't give him any information on the poems or where they were found. So, muttering a quiet good bye, the old man left her alone with her thoughts.

Suddenly, a loud thunk and slight splash on her sleeve startled Medic out of her reverie. Looking down at the table in front of her, she noticed a cup of black coffee instead of tea, and some of it had spilt as the rather bad tempered Chinese waitress slammed her cup down in front of her. Managing, just about, to mutter a thank you, Medic drank the hot beverage anyway. She liked coffee, though black coffee was extremely bitter and the sugar within the drink didn't quite counteract it.

"Good riddance to international relations…" she grumbled, putting down her half empty cup with a sigh. Suddenly, a flash of red from the street outside caught her eye. She froze.

Walking past, in the customary uniform of an Exorcist, was Lavi. Beside him were Allen and Link, both looking somewhat concerned by the red head who was storming ahead of them. Wondering why he was in such a bad mood, Medic downed the rest of her drink, ignoring her burning tongue, handed the woman behind the counter the money she owed, and walked out the door. Soon enough she caught up with the trio and happily hugged Lavi from behind, grinning.

"Hello _baka usagi-chan_!" she cried. "What brings you here?"

"Ah _féijíchǎng_! Where did you come from?" Lavi replied, startled. Medic smiled.

"I got frustrated 'cause I couldn't find or remember what I was looking for," she answered. "So I went in for what was supposed to be a cup of tea, but the waitress obviously wasn't all that happy that I was Japanese so gave me coffee instead."

"Well we went looking for you after we had eaten and found your note," Allen explained with a smile, a brief look of embarrassment flashing in his eyes before dissipating, making Medic smirk internally. "Then we noticed that you'd left a list of things on a noticeboard, so we decided to come and look for you."

"Aww that's very sweet of you Allen-chan!" Medic said, hugging the white haired teen and ignoring his protests. Lavi laughed, handing the brunette her list of ingredients. Then Medic added, "So, what are you going to do now?"

At this both Lavi and Allen fell silent. Link coughed.

"We're going to go find a phone, for I need to contact Central Administration about our arrival," the blonde replied curtly, straightening his tie as he talked. "Do you know of any phones in the area, miss?"

"There should be a pay phone at a place called the Crossed Swords," Medic replied, blushing a little at being called 'miss'.

"Thank you."

The instant Medic said 'Crossed Swords', Lavi winced. He knew where they were going to have to go, and the uneasy feeling that had subsided somewhat from earlier rose up within him like a tidal wave. Allen and Medic both noticed this but kept silent, sharing a glance and knowing that the other was thinking the same thing.

"Would you like us to accompany you shopping first?" Allen asked quietly. Medic shook her head, looking at Lavi as she did so.

"I'll be okay. Go and find the phone, and I'll meet you by the main gate if you like in an hour or so so we can head back to Headquarters together."

Allen nodded in acknowledgment.

"Shall we go?" he asked tentatively, noticing that Link was staring at Lavi with narrowed eyes, and the red head himself was looking to one side with a bitter expression. Link nodded, and Lavi did not reply.

"Before you go, can I talk with you a moment, _baka usagi-chan_?" Medic asked. The red head looked up then, a little startled. Then, nodding, he followed the brunette as she headed a few metres away towards a nearby flower stall, leaving Allen and Link to wait opposite the café whilst they spoke. Concerned, Medic placed both hands on Lavi's shoulders and looked him straight in the eye.

"What's up with you, _baka usagi-chan_?" she asked. "You look rather-"

"I'm fine. Don't worry about i-"

The red head got no further, for Medic flicked him sharply on the forehead, scowling.

"Don't lie to me, _baka_. Just tell me."

For a while, silence. Then -

"This is where I used to live, _féijíchǎng_…" Lavi eventually murmured, looking down at his feet as he spoke. "And Crossed Swords is where…"

Medic's eyes widened as realisation hit her. Lavi fell silent, expression turning hurt. Then, with a sigh, Medic stood up on tiptoes and ruffled the red head's hair like she used to when he was little with a small smile.

"It'll be okay," she murmured. "You have to face your demons someday, and Allen-chan's here for you now if you need him, right?"

After a little while Lavi smiled and looked up, his single green eye meeting Medic's dark brown ones.

"You're right. _Arigatou, _Medic-chan!"

As he spoke in Japanese, Medic laughed and hugged Lavi with a grin. Then, moving backwards, she gave him a nod and walked away, giving a parting wave to the red head and Allen also.

"Shall we go now?" Link asked, walking up to Lavi and placing his hands on his hips with a scowl. The red head turned around and nodded, looking determined. Allen smiled at this new-found confidence and walked beside him as they headed down the road towards this elusive 'Crossed Swords', where Lavi's past and future were about to meet for the first time in over a decade.

After about ten minutes they reached the establishment. It was seedy, no doubt about it, and it was rather obvious that the building served more than just drinks from the skimpily-dressed women waiting outside. Lavi sighed.

"This is the place, unfortunately," he muttered, turning around to face Link and Allen. "It isn't exactly the safest of places, so be careful."

"Will we be allowed in?" Allen asked, frowning a little. "Master went to such places often when he was training me, and you weren't allowed in unless you had permission from the owner."

"It's okay. We'll be allowed in," Lavi replied, looking slightly awkward. "Just… follow me."

And not saying another word, Lavi walked towards the door. Sharing a look, Allen and Link followed, albeit reluctantly. Soon enough, the three of them were waiting outside of the door of what was obviously a brothel, ignoring the lusty pleas from the young prostitutes outside. Eventually, a tall man in his late twenties or early thirties, dressed in traditional Chinese garb with grey hair tied in a loose side ponytail, sprung out of the entrance and almost walked straight past them. It was only when he turned to give the women outside a wink and a little wave that he spotted them.

"Oh, I do apologise!" he cried, slapping his forehead with a hand and shaking his head slightly, turning towards them with a sheepish smile. "I have so many thoughts going through my head that I don't ev-"

Suddenly the man froze, eyes widening. His mouth dropped open. Then, with a delighted cry, he grabbed hold of Lavi and hugged him so tightly that the red head could scarcely breathe.

"HÓNG SÈ!"

"G-gahh.. c-c-can't... breathe... Huí sè..."

Stepping backwards and laughing as Lavi gasped for breath, whose cheeks were tinged pink from lack of oxygen, the man gave a heartwarming smile.

"I can't believe it's you! _Hǎojǐu bújiàn_, hmm? Where have you been all these years?" he asked, expression saddening as he continued. "We thought you died that night alongside Zǐ sè and Motoki. We were so worried..."

At this Lavi's face fell a little.

"I'm sorry, Huí sè," he murmured after a while, rubbing the side of his arm whilst looking at the floor. "Guess I shoulda asked the stupid panda to tell you where I was..."

"Stupid panda?"

"Bookman."

"Oh, him! W-wait, you've been with him all this time?"

"Well, yeah I ha-"

"Sorry to interrupt but what on Earth is going on ? !"

Both Lavi and the man addressed as Huí sè froze, turning towards Link.

"My apologies, sir," Huí sè said, bowing his head. "I am just happy to see an old friend, of sorts."

"Old friend?" Allen echoed, blinking in confusion. Lavi nodded, albeit looking sheepish and slightly ashamed as he did so.

"Huí sè was kinda like my crazy uncle when I was a kid," Lavi answered, adjusting his eyepatch with a somewhat nervous countenance. "He took care of me when my ma went here to work."

At this confession, both Allen and Link fell silent. Then, almost as if Lavi had just mentioned the weather opposed to admitting that his mother was a prostitute, Allen simply nodded and smiled a little. Link said nothing, narrowing his eyes.

"Well, it's nice to meet you Mr. Huí sè," the white haired teen said cheerfully, extending an arm towards the grey haired man and shaking his hand. "My name's Allen Walker."

"It's nice to meet you too," Huí sè replied, amused. "And how do you know my dear Hóng sè, hmm?"

"H-Hóng sè?"

"He means me, Allen. It's the name I went by when I lived here."

"Oh! Is Hóng sè your real name then?"

"Nah, it's just a nickname of sorts. It means 'Red' in Mandarin."

"Ah, okay. That's weird, I was called Red as a child too."

"Woah, really ? ! Cool, I didn't kn-"

"Excuse me!"

Again, everyone turned towards Link. The blonde was red faced from anger and looked as if he was about to have an aneurysm.

"We came here to find a phone, not have a nice reunion!" Link snapped, glaring at Lavi and Huí sè vehemently. "Now, if you don't mind _good sir_, may we use the phone that you have in your… establishment?"

"Ummm, sure…" the grey haired man replied, looking at the blonde CROW with a nervous expression. Then, turning towards Lavi, he added, "We can catch up whilst he uses the phone?"

"Sure," Lavi replied, nodding.

Nodding also, Huí sè headed towards the door that he had exited out of and opened it by using a key from around his neck.

"We need to keep things private, you know?" he replied with a smirk, chuckling at the disturbed expression on Allen's face (who hated brothels because of Cross), and the slightly disgusted expression that Link gave him. With an 'aha' of success he pushed the door open, beckoned them inside, and shut and locked the door behind them.

It was a brothel alright.

Boobs. Boobs everywhere. Link had never seen so many topless, and even naked, women in all his 19 years of life. He promptly blushed bright red the instant they entered the building, keeping his gaze firmly planted on the floor. Allen, though the youngest out of all of them, didn't even blink at the rather inappropriate clothing, or lack thereof, worn by the women inside. Lavi, also, did not react in the slightest. Though his persona 'Lavi' would most certainly have been drooling and yelling "Strike!" until his voice went hoarse at such promiscuous sights, the red headed Bookman felt his persona slip a little and, since Allen and Link had already seen through the cracks in his mask, Lavi saw no point in trying to uphold his persona's customs.

"Hello my darlings ~ !" Huí sè purred, stepping forwards and hugging a group of girls feeding a rather fat Asian strawberries and cream.

"Oi Huí sè! Weren't you going to fetch Hé huā?" one asked, pouting a little and adjusting her skimpy lingerie. "You were only gone a minute or so!"

"Ahh my sweet little Méi guī huā, that's because I found some very special people outside!" the grey haired man replied, grinning. "The white haired one's called Allen, the blonde's called... uhh..."

"Link. Howard Link."

"Ahh, there we go! And the red head's our dear long lost Hóng sè!"

As the grey-haired brothel owner introduced them all, Allen thought back on what the man had said about Lavi's past. It was evident that his mother and someone else had been killed the day Bookman took Lavi to the Headquarters of the Bookman Clan, and that no-one was told about Lavi's location nor if he was even alive. But what had happened that caused the deaths of the two people closest to Lavi? Was he there to witness it? Was foul play involved? Allen didn't know.

And, knowing Lavi, he probably wouldn't ever know.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Flashback - 1872/1873_

The view was beautiful.

Golden sunlight illuminated the snowy mountain tops, turning them from a pure white to a fiery orange as if someone had set the great peaks aflame. Then the sun broke over the rim of the rocky pinnacles, bright rays of light illuminating the landscape below. The forest awakened from its twilight slumber, leaves glinting like emeralds as the light touched them. Then the nearby villages came into view, the outskirts of the town following. Soon enough, daybreak had fully arrived.

Another day dawned over the only world that Hóng sè had ever known.

The young red headed boy sighed and smiled contentedly as a gentle summer breeze blew past, swinging his little legs over the roof's edge. Then, a shout from beneath him caught his attention.

"Breakfast!"

With a grin Hóng sè got up, tripped over his own feet in his excitement, stood up again and pelted it through a nearby door, leaping down the steps. In a matter of seconds the boy reached the bottom of the staircase, racing past the doors leading to two bedrooms, and skidded to a halt in a tiny kitchen, panting for breath.

"_Zǎoān_! It's almost ready so take a seat."

Standing before a little gas stove was a beautiful woman in her mid twenties, long black hair as soft as silk coming down to her waist, green eyes twinkling with amusement.

"Okay _māmā_!"

Sitting down cross-legged on the floor, the young red head smiled at his mother and waited as patiently as a 4 year old could wait, watching the rice that was coming to a boil hungrily. The instant his mother had drained the rice, spooned it into two bowls and placed one before him, the boy quickly said "_māmā chī fàn_" before gobbling his rice up as if he hadn't eaten in about a week, making his mother laugh.

It had only been 3 days since he had last eaten, but still. 3 days to a child felt like a week anyway.

"Done!" he cried, placing his empty bowl before him. "Is there any more?"

"Sorry, Hóng sè, there isn't," his mother replied, smiling sadly. "Pester Huí sè when we get to Crossed Swords for some food, 'kay?"

"Okay..." came the quiet reply.

Then, giving his mother a tight hug and smile, the red head picked his bowl up and, using a bowl of water from the far corner of the room, washed it up. His hands couldn't really clean the bowl very well, and the water had been lying there for at least 2 days, but what other choice did he have? Once he had finished, he placed the bowl upside down on the floor to dry and stood up.

"Are we goin' to Uncle Huí sè's soon, _māmā_?" Hóng sè asked, turning to face the woman who was eating her breakfast slowly with relish. She nodded. Deciding to get ready, the red head exited the kitchen and walked down the hallway, entering the last room on the right; his bedroom.

It was tiny, being just about big enough for a small bed and chest of drawers. Clambering onto his bed, since it was the only way to get to the chest, the young boy opened it and took out a 'clean' shirt and shorts. Quickly taking off the clothes he had worn to bed, Hóng sè dressed and put on an eye patch to cover his right eye. It was a little too big for him and it slipped downwards sometimes, but he didn't have anything else to cover up his eye with, and he knew the consequences of people knowing about his secret.

Once he was ready, the red head left his bedroom, closing the door behind him.

When he re-entered the kitchen, his mother was cleaning up her bowl and the saucepan she used to cook the rice with.

"Are you all ready?" she asked, turning towards her son with a smile. The little red head nodded.

"Yeah. Are we going after you're ready?" Hóng sè asked. His mother laughed.

"Well, we do need so more fresh water. Could you get some for me?"

The boy nodded vigorously, eager to help. Quickly popping into a little cupboard near the front door, Hóng sè picked up a medium sized bucket, opened the door and left the house, swinging the bucket from side to side as he walked to the well.

The nearest well was about a five minute walk away, but it was very popular amongst the other citizens of the town so there was probably going to be a queue. Hóng sè didn't mind very much though; his mother needed time to get ready, and they would have to get some 'fresh' water at some point.

As this came to mind, the little red head's face fell a little. His mother did not enjoy her work – even at the tender age of 4 he understood that what his mother did was something that she shouldn't have to do. In a way he was more mature than some even ten years older than himself – many would either be ignorant of the situation and just selfishly think of themselves, or be irrational and try and find some way of helping, even if it wasn't possible.

Hóng sè was realistic – he knew that, at his age, there was nothing that he could do to help his mother get money. And, he was aware of what his mother did and that it wasn't the way that most obtained money. So he did all he _could_ do – he was there for his mother, and supported her throughout all that she did. He smiled and was happy, and did jobs for her to ease her workload. Hóng sè kept his mother's life as sunny and as cheerful as humanly possible, so that she felt as if life was worth struggling for. That life was worth fighting for.

Because, to Hóng sè, his mother meant everything. And being there for her was Hóng sè's meaning for living.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Morning Uncle Huí sè!"

"Good morning, little Hóng sè!"

With a laugh Huí sè lifted the little red head up by the sides and spun him round, making him giggle delightedly. A few steps away from them, Hóng sè's mother smiled.

"And good morning to you too, Zǐ sè," the grey haired man said cheerfully, putting the red headed boy down and turning to his mother with a grin. The raven haired woman nodded in reply.

Using his key, Huí sè unlocked the door to the Crossed Swords and ushered Hóng sè and Zǐ sè inside, entering after them. A rush of warm air and a chorus of "Good morning!" hit the trio, and the three of them smiled and returned the greetings. Zǐ sè quickly took off her coat, revealing the rather skimpy lingerie underneath. Giving her son a kiss on the forehead and a warning to behave, Zǐ sè walked over to the nearest unattended man and went about her business.

"So, wanna help me add up more money, Hóng sè?" Huí sè asked, turning to the young boy beside him. Said boy nodded, smiling.

"As long as I get some food out of it," he stated, smile turning into a smirk as he walked through the throngs of women and men towards a door on the far corner of the room. Huí sè laughed, rolling his eyes.

"Of course, little Hóng sè, of course."

"Heh... by the way, when's Motoki comin' back?"

"I don't know, kiddo. He said he had some business to take care of, right? I'm sure he'll be back soon."

"But he's taking forever! I miss him, and _māmā_'s getting all depressed again..."

At this Huí sè ruffled the boy's hair, chuckling at the childish pout that the red head was pulling.

"Just be patient!" the man said. "Thing's will work themselves out, I'm sure."

"You promise?" Hóng sè asked, looking up at Huí sè. The man nodded.

"I promise."

Just at that moment, Hóng sè noticed an old man with black circles around his eyes sitting in a corner, smoking from a pipe and playing with what looked like little tiles.

"Ne, I'll come help you in a minute Uncle," the boy murmured, heading towards the mysterious old man curiously. Rolling his eyes, Huí sè entered his office and let the red headed child satisfy his curiosity.

When Hóng sè eventually reached the old man, he looked up and narrowed his eyes. He remained silent, however, leaving Hóng sè to make the first move.

"Why aren't you being attended to?" the boy asked innocently, adjusting his eyepatch as he spoke. "They're all really pretty."

At this the old man snorted a little.

"I am fine as I am," he said, not looking up from the tiles before him. "Aren't children like yourself supposed to be playing outside?"

"_Māmā_ says it's dangerous outside," Hóng sè replied. "So I stay in here while she works."

The old man looked up at that, interested.

"Is that so? Do you agree with your mother?"

"Yes. Humans are nasty people, with the rich getting everything and the poor getting nothing," the boy muttered, looking contemptuous. "If humans were nice, _māmā_ wouldn't have to be so unhappy and we'd get to eat everyday."

For a while the old man was silent, studying the red headed child before him with narrowed eyes. Then he put down his pipe and leant forward.

"What is your name, _xiǎo nán hái_?" the old man asked.

"Hóng sè."

"And how old are you?"

"I'm nearly 5, I think."

"Can you read and write?"

"In both Mandarin and English, yes."

"Who taught you?"

"_Māmā_ taught me Mandarin and Huí sè taught me English. He's the owner of this place."

The old man fell silent.

"So, since you've asked me tons of questions - what's your name?"

"I have no name. I simply go by the title of Bookman."

"How weird! And how old are you?"

"None of your business, brat."

"Hehe, sorry. Whatcha playing then?"

At this, Hóng sè leant forward eagerly, picking up a tile. Bookman chuckled.

"It is called _má jiàng_." he answered, eyeing the boy before him curiously.

"Can you teach me how to play it?" Hóng sè asked, looking at Bookman with a pleading expression.

"Hmpf, if you can understand it," came the gruff reply.

Grinning, the little red head pulled up a chair and sat beside the old man, swinging his legs and smiling contentedly. Bookman, though wondering why he was attempting to teach a mere 4 year old child Mahjong, set out the tiles on the board before him.

"Each player starts by building a wall that is 18 tiles long and 2 tiles high. You then push all 4 walls together to form a square with the tiles. Then you open the wall, and the dealer deals out the tiles. The dealer starts by discarding a tile and the next person can either discard or pick up a tile from the wall," Bookman explained. Hóng sè listened attentively, frowning in concentration. Bookman continued. "After they pick up a tile, they then discard it. That continues until someone calls "Mahjong" and they call that when they get a winning hand, which consists of 4 kongs, pungs, chows and one pair."

"What's a kong, and stuff?" Hóng sè asked, confused.

"A kong is 4 of the same tile. And a pung is 3 of the same tile and same suit. A chow is 3 consecutive tiles of the same suit, for example a 3, 4, and 5 of the bamboo suit. And a pair is 2 of the same tile which have to be from the same suit also."

For a little while Hóng sè was silent, processing what had just been said. Then he looked up at Bookman.

"So there are four players?"

"Usually."

"And how many tiles in total?"

"136, though it varies from locality to locality."

"I see... Can I watch you play a practice one?"

Bookman nodded, again feeling a rush of curiousity towards the boy sitting beside him. For one so young he was very intellectual.

So, in silence, Bookman started a game and played it through in silence. The young red head watched his every move thoroughly, his concentration unwavering throughout the entire mock match. When Bookman eventually achieved the winning combination of suits, he muttered "Mahjong" and turned towards Hóng sè.

"Satisfied?" the old man asked. The boy looked up, determination in his single eye.

"I want to play a match with you."

At this, Bookman laughed.

"You cannot master the rules of Mahjong just by watching," the old man said whilst shaking his head slightly. "It takes many matches worth of practice before you can fully understa-"

"Just do it."

The fierceness with which the boy said this made Bookman fall silent. Then, with a sigh, the old man re-set the board.

"We will play with the full set, with two walls each," Bookman stated, feeling slightly stupid for taking a 4 year old so seriously. The boy had no chance of winning. Hóng sè nodded to show that he understood, pulling his chair to the opposite side of the table to Bookman and sitting down.

Then the game began.

And to say Bookman was surprised would be an understatement.

The young red head knew _exactly_ what he was doing after simply viewing Bookman play against himself once. Only once. The boy knew the rules as well as if he had been playing for years, and kept a poker face throughout the entire match, acting far more mature than his age suggested. And when the little red head cried "Mahjong!", Bookman truly felt as if he was dreaming.

"Y-you can't have!" Bookman said increduously, leaning forward to check. But Hóng sè was right. He had the full set of suits, and Bookman himself was at least a few moves away from achieving this. The old man sat back down and looked the boy straight in the eye.

"How did you do that?"

"Probably a mixture of luck and that you're easy to read."

"... Explain."

"Whenever you get a good tile, the corner of your lips turn up very very slightly then you act really blank afterwards to stop me from guessing. Oh, and you like to play 'randomly' and discard a tile alternately between 3 moves, to 2 moves, to 5 moves, to 7 moves, and back to 3 again. And you always build your kongs first."

Bookman was stunned. Hóng sè laughed, green eye glittering with pride and amusement.

"And how did you figure all of that out?" Bookman asked quietly. The red head grinned, tapping the side of his head.

"I've got a picture perfect memory."

Bookman's eyes widened. Picture perfect? It certainly explained how the boy could beat him in a game he'd been playing for years by someone who had never played before. But for a mere 4 year old child to be able to analyse someone so thoroughly... Bookman had never felt so intrigued and interested in someone since his last apprentice.

And at that moment Bookman knew that he had found the person he'd been looking for.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"So, did you help Huí sè out in his office?"

"Yeah! And he gave me this really yummy thing called sorbet, but I was hungry so I forgot to save some for you. Sorry _māmā_..."

"Hey, it's okay. I'm not that hungry right now anyway."

"Okay... Oh, yeah! Someone's coming round later, and he's bringin' food!"

At this Zǐ sè froze and turned towards her son.

"Who? You can't just invite people round!" the woman cried, placing her hands on the red head's shoulders and shaking him slightly, panicking.

"Don't worry! He's some old guy called Bookman. He taught me a game earlier and I beat him," Hóng sè replied smugly, smirking. "He said he wanted to talk to you, and that if you were okay with it that I could meet him by the well and then take him home."

"So... he doesn't know where we live..." Zǐ sè murmured, calming down. Hóng sè nodded.

"Of course not! I'm not stupid, _māmā_!"

The little red head pouted as he said this, making his mother laugh. She ruffled his hair affectionately.

"Well how about you go find him now then. That should give me enough time to change and clean up a bit," she said, smiling. Hóng sè returned the smile and, with a nod, parted ways with his mother, heading towards the centre of town to find Bookman.

Soon enough he reached the well and found the old man leaning against the side of it, looking thoughtful. He smiled a little as Hóng sè ran up to him.

"Did you ask?"

"Yep! _Māmā_ said it's fine."

Bookman nodded, looking pleased.

"Then if you would accompany me to purchase some food for you and your mother?" he asked. The boy's face lit up.

"Thank you so much! I know exactly what you should get too!"

And with that Hóng sè grabbed Bookman's hand and dragged him unceremoniously down the street, ignoring the old man's protests. Eventually they reached the busy food stalls, the smell of cooking food making the red head drool.

"I've always wanted to get food from here," he said, looking slightly sad. "But it's all so expensive..."

Bookman looked down at the boy by his side, noticing just how thin he was and how little food he probably did eat. The old man sighed; Clan Head was going to kill him for this...

"Pick whatever you wish."

Hóng sè looked up sharply, stunned.

"Y-you mean it?"

"What are you, deaf ? ! Go and pick something, brat!"

And, with that, the boy gave a delighted cheer and ran off quicker than Bookman could have said 'yakuniku'. Bookman sighed, heading after the red head.

"What am I getting myself into... ?"

30 minutes later, Bookman had a considerably lighter money pouch and Hóng sè was carrying a mountain of boxes filled with food. His stomach grumbled.

"Ahh I can't wait to eat this ~ !" he cried, grinning. Bookman sighed.

"I need to smoke..." he muttered, knowing the grief he'd get for spending so much money on the boy. Bookman reached for his pipe and froze when his fingers met fabric and nothing else.

"My pipe!"

Hóng sè stopped, turning towards Bookman.

"What's wrong?"

"I must have left it at the rice stall," the old man said quietly, remembering how he got it out and then put it down on the stall before him and ran after Hóng sè as he stole his money pouch and sped off with it. The pipe had been a gift from the previous Bookman; his master. Knowing that he couldn't lose such a memento, Bookman turned towards the boy beside him.

"I must retrieve it. Go back home with the food and meet me at the well again," he instructed.

"Got it!"

And with a parting smile the boy headed home, humming as he went.

Times like these reminded him of why life was worth living.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"I'm home, _māmā_!"

Silence greeted Hóng sè as he entered through the front door. The boy frowned, putting down the huge pile of food in his arms on the floor.

"_Māmā_?"

The red head walked forwards. What was with this feeling? The hairs on the back of his neck were standing up, goosebumps appearing on his arms, his heart beating faster. He felt scared, but what was he so afraid of? Noticing that the door to his mother's bedroom was open, Hóng sè stepped inside. Standing just in front of the doorway was a man; dark haired, clothed in a tattered suit. Hóng sè's heart leapt for joy.

"Motoki! You're back!"

He ran forward, hugging the man before him. Motoki was like a father to him, and Hóng sè treasured him dearly. He trusted him, and had put his faith in him too.

So when Motoki didn't respond Hóng sè knew that something was wrong.

"Hey, you okay?"

The red head walked around the man as he said this then froze. A shudder went up his spine as he suddenly stepped in something wet and slightly sticky. Hóng sè looked down.

Blood.

The floor was covered in it. It was even on the walls. Eye widening, Hóng sè found himself mechanically looking around the room, numbness setting in. Motoki was covered in blood splatters, a knife in his hands, eyes blank. And lying on the bed was Hóng sè's mother. And she was dead.

"_M-m-māmā_?"

His heartbeat quickened, mind whirring, vision spinning, breathing faster and faster and faster. Shock was soon replaced with horror as it dawned on him.

Motoki had killed his mother.

As Hóng sè realised this, the man beside him started to chuckle. Then he was laughing, insanity in his voice and eyes. Hóng sè turned, eye wide.

"Welcome home my dear little Hóng sè!" the man cried, grinning. "Will you die like your slut of a mother, hmm?"

Motoki shoved the red head against the nearest wall, using the handle of the knife in his hands to strangle the boy with. Hóng sè choked, tears forming in his eye. Panic seized him.

"Aww, sad that she's dead?" Motoki murmured sarcastically, leaning in close and smirking. "She didn't put up much of a fight. Even raping her wasn't very fun."

Tears dripped down to the floor.

"Don't cry! I'm gonna give you the choice, unlike that bitch."

Motoki released the handle from Hóng sè's neck, grinning triumphantly as the boy fell to the ground, wheezing for breath. Then he punched him hard in the stomach, making the red head cry out in pain. The sharp crack of some of his ribs breaking made Motoki smile. He lifted Hóng sè up.

"You can either choose to live or choose to die," he whispered, leaning forwards so he was speaking directly into the red head's ear. "If you choose to die, I will kill you with this knife and it will be quick and painless."

Motoki pressed the knife into the boy's neck, feeling the blood drip down onto his feet. Hóng sè whimpered, confused and horrified.

"But, if you choose to live..."

The man pressed his body against the red headed boy and grinned.

"I will take all the innocence that you have left away from you."

Hóng sè froze. He could feel something hard against his stomach, and it took a few seconds for him to realise what Motoki wanted to do to him.

"No..."

"So, what's it gonna be Hóng sè?"

"N-no, you're not-"

"What will you choose?"

"You're not Motoki!"

"Choices, choices, hmm?"

"No!"

"I know which one _I_ want you to pi-"

"NO!"

With a suddenness that surprised the man before him, Hóng sè shoved Motoki away from him and ran out of the room, pelting it towards the front door.

"There's nowhere to run, Hóng sè."

"No!"

So many thoughts and feelings were swirling within the young boy's mind, images of his mother smiling at him making his heart twist painfully. He heard footsteps behind him. Panic shot through him. He tripped over the food he had left by the door, crying out as his right arm twisted painfully underneath him as he fell.

"Leave me alone!"

Hóng sè staggered to his feet, lunging for the door handle.

Motoki grabbed his shirt and dragged him to the floor.

"Caught you now, Hóng sè!" Motoki said triumphantly, grinning as he pinned the red head to the ground.

"N-no, _qǐng_! I don't want-"

Hóng sè cried out as the man above him cut his arms slowly with the blade he held, tears sliding down his face.

"Now it's time for you to make your choice," Motoki breathed, eyes glinting. In desperation Hóng sè punched the man in the face, panic in his eye. Motoki barely budged.

"Live or die?"

"LET GO OF ME!"

"You know what will happen if you choose to live, don't you?"

Motoki's hands drifted to the boy's shorts.

"Stop."

"I wonder..."

The sound of fabric rubbing against wooden floorboards seemed deafeningly loud.

"Stop!"

The boy was sobbing, voice breaking. He couldn't break free. He was trapped. The only way out was death.

But he didn't want to die.

The red head scarcely registered the sound of a fly being undone, or the sadistic chuckling from Motoki as he parted his legs.

"Will you scream for me, Hóng sè?"

"STOP!"

And scream Hóng sè did.

Over. And over. And over and over. Unending volleys of tortured screams as the man Hóng sè had trusted more than anyone forcefully took him. No matter how many times he begged Motoki to stop, he didn't. He just. Wouldn't. Stop.

Hóng sè was breaking, his mind shattering. The pain all-encompassing. It had to end. He couldn't take it anymore.

"Such a good little Hóng sè..."

Motoki's voice was breathless, making the red head want to vomit.

"It's all your fault, you know that!"

With a sudden rip Motoki tore the eyepatch covering Hóng sè's right eye off. His eyes darkened.

"All your fault!"

"N-no...!"

"All your fault!"

"STOP IT!"

"ALL YOUR FAULT!"

A sudden coldness by his left hand made Hóng sè freeze. It was the knife.

"Your damned eye made me lose everything!"

He could do it. He would stop then. The pain would be over.

"I have nothing left!"

It had to stop.

"NOTHING!"

With a sickening choke Motoki fell silent. At first, he couldn't really register what had happened. He stopped moving within the boy beneath him, frowning.

Then he saw the blood.

Hóng sè's face twisted hatefully as he slid the knife in his hands deeper into Motoki's neck, blood pouring down on him like scarlet rain. Motoki choked, eyes wide. With a cry the little red headed boy pulled the blade out, pushing the man off of him and crawling backwards, tears streaming down his face.

"Why... w-why, Motoki..."

The boy was crying, dropping the knife in his hands. Motoki fell to the ground with a thunk, his blood spreading out across the floor in a ruby red puddle.

"Why ? !"

Hóng sè started to hyperventilate, eyes wide, blood soaking the shorts around his ankles. Madness consumed the edges of his world like unearthly fire. Motoki gurgled, sitting up and crawling towards him slowly. Hóng sè didn't move a muscle as the man reached him and suddenly cupped the right side of his face, touching his right eyelid with blood covered fingers. His final words came out in a choked whisper.

"Who... are you?"

Hóng sè froze, eyes widening with horror.

"B-because I d-don't... think even you k-know... the answer... to t-that question..."

And with that Motoki fell backwards, eyes unseeing and glazed over, death claiming him whole.

And with that a little boy's sanity shattered with a single agonised scream.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- féijíchǎng = flat chested (mandarin chinese)

- Wǔān. Wǒ néng bāng nǐ ma? = Good afternoon. What can I do for you? (mandarin chinese)

- Bāng yī xià máng? = Can you help me? (mandarin chinese)

- xiè xiè = thank you (mandarin chinese)

- baka usagi-chan = my dear little rabbit (japanese)

- konnichiwa = hello (japanese)

- baka = stupid (japanese)

- arigatou = thank you (japanese)

- Hóng sè = Red (mandarin chinese)

- Huí sè = Grey (mandarin chinese)

- Zǐ sè = Purple (mandarin chinese)

- hǎojǐu bújiàn = long time no see (mandarin chinese)

- Hé huā = Lotus (mandarin chinese)

- Méi guī huā = Rose (mandarin chinese)

- māmā = mother (mandarin chinese)

- zǎoān = good morning (mandarin chinese)

- māmā chī fàn = before you eat in China, you say something respectful to the elders eating with you, starting with the eldest. So this is just a quick thank you of sorts to one's mother :'3

- xiǎo nán hái = little boy (mandarin chinese)

- má jiàng = Mahjong (mandarin chinese)

- qǐng = please (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**... Please don't kill me *flees for the hills* You have no idea how hard it was to write that last scene O_o...**

**Anyway, review replies:**

**- Anactolica = I will make sure to get you Vaseline for your birthday ;3 And I'm sorry if this made you cry... And my lent's broken now, so yeah... I fail at life /cries**

**- patrick the almighty observer = Lol poor classmates XD They'll have no idea what you're saying to them XD And yeah, maybe don't say it in front of your Mandarin teacher ^^"**

**- kh07gl = I feel so horrible for being so cruel to Lavi :'( And I think I'll make Allen know his past at some point, but not right now. Gahh I'm sick right now too -.-" It sucks... I hope you're feeling better now ~**

**- Stavarn100 = I do want to write the oneshot! *determined* It will be done :'D**

**- MidnightAbyssx02 = ... Okay XD Just wait and see, 'kay?**

**- Lingering Sorrow = Aha good ol' perverted Lavi *laughs* And I don't what they could use instead... They'll come up with something, I'm sure ;'3 Ahh I love Allen also (though Lavi's my fave :D) and just wait and see about the Heart - I'll reveal all eventually ~**

**Thanks for reviewing, sorry if I made you cry with Lavi's past, and look forward to chapter 9! Love you ~**

**xrowa-chanx**


	9. Chapter 9: Determining The Truth

**Hey everyone :'D Ahh I'm so excited, I turn 17 on Saturday X3 I'll finally be old enough to drive! ... Not that I can afford lessons ahaha... ha... /shoots self**

**Anyway, thank you to Anactolica, animeobsessed001, Geeres, Angel Fantasy, patrick the almighty observer, Lingering Sorrow, janrockiss, Hanashi no iu and kh07gl for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing *huge grin* Your feedback makes me so happy :'3 Enjoy chapter 9 ~**

**Oh, and sorry if Lavi's OOC in this - I don't really know how to write him when he isn't acting like 'Lavi' (the persona, I mean) -.-"**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Maybe none of this is about control. Maybe it isn't really about who can own whom, who can do what to whom and get away with it, even as far as death. Maybe it isn't about who can sit and who has to kneel or stand or lie down, legs spread open. Maybe it's about who can do what to whom and be forgiven for it. Never tell me it amounts to the same thing._

Margaret Atwood; The Handmaid's Tale

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 9 - Determining The Truth

If there was one thing that Lavi had missed, it was Huí sè's office.

Wood panelled walls, leather chairs, a large desk covered in framed photos of Huí sè's favourite 'flowers', as he called the women who worked for him, random pieces of paper scattered across the floor, books everywhere. It felt homely to Lavi, even if it oddly seemed a bit like Komui's office. The red head smiled as he sank down in one of the chairs.

"Still trying to appear richer than you actually are, hmm?" Lavi questioned cheekily, smirking as the grey haired man turned to face him with an indignant pout.

"I'm not trying to do anything of the sort," he huffed. "I just have a sense of style unlike you, Hóng sè."

"Ne, my name's Lavi now - I stopped calling myself Hóng sè years ago."

At this, Huí sè sat down in the other available chair, expression becoming more serious.

"Why is that?" he asked, frowning. "Did you wish to break your ties to this place, or... ?"

"As a Bookman, you have to change your name every time you take on a new persona," Lavi replied with a small smile.

"... So you're a Bookman now, huh? Was that your decision?"

"Yes."

"Bookman didn't force you into it?"

"No."

"But why take off and leave everything you knew behind? I don't know what being a Bookman fully entails, but I know enough from having talked to Bookman before that it isn't an easy life."

"It isn't, no. We have to record warfare, which is never gonna be a walk in the park. But it's important - Bookmen provide the facts that others miss. The hidden history."

"But is that important to you? Why did _you _choose to become a Bookman?"

Lavi fell silent. For a while he sat and stared at the ceiling, single green eye clouded over with a mixture of emotions; hate, sadness, pain, guilt. Huí sè's eyes narrowed, but he kept silent. Eventually the red head sighed and pulled his bandana down irritably, fiddling with it absentmindedly.

"... It was my fault that they died, Huí sè..." he murmured quietly, refusing to meet the older man's gaze. Huí sè's eyes widened.

"What do you mean? ... Wh-what happened that day anyway?"

"..."

"You can talk to me, Hon- I mean, Lavi."

"I..."

"Yes?"

Lavi sighed, pulling his legs up and resting his head on his knees. He seemed a lot younger all of a sudden, for he often sat in such a position in the past when he had been in Huí sè's office, curled up amongst the leather and bits of paper. It made Huí sè painfully aware of how much had changed about the red headed teen before him. Suddenly Lavi looked up, his eye meeting Huí sè's.

"Motoki killed _māmā_."

The grey haired man's eyes flew wide open.

"Wh-what? But... why on Earth would he-"

"I have no idea. I've always wanted to know why but... I just... I just came home to..."

Lavi found himself unable to continue, a lump forming in his throat. He couldn't tell Huí sè what else Motoki had done. It was something he had revealed to no-one, and something he would never reveal to anyone.

A dark secret that had to be kept wreathed in darkness, for as long as Lavi lived.

"But... what happened to Motoki? How did he die? Who killed him?" Huí sè asked after a while, frowning. Lavi laughed bitterly, looking away.

"Who do you think?" the red head said quietly, eye darkening. Huí sè paled, looking shocked. For a long time neither of them said anything. Then, tentatively, the grey haired man leant forward and placed a hand over Lavi's.

"I'm... I'm so sorry," he murmured, looking down at his feet. "I wish you had never been forced to experience such horrors at such a young a-"

"Why're you apologising?" Lavi asked, shaking his head slightly with a small smile. "What happened, happened. It was 14 years ago, and I've moved on since then."

"Have you though?" Huí sè questioned, voice quiet. "You still seem very torn up about it, though I don't for one second blame you."

Lavi winced slightly, pulling his hand away from Huí sè's. The red head looked away.

"I've put the memories from That Day away with what I experienced with the rest of my previous personas. Though... I guess coming back here's kinda brought it all to the fore, huh..." Lavi said, leaning back in his chair. "I didn't ever expect that I'd be here as 'Lavi', I have to admit. My role as an Exorcist doesn't usually interfere with my past."

"... An Exorcist? Are you both Bookman and Apostle then?"

"Yeah. Me and Gramps are logging the Holy War, after all."

Huí sè leant backwards, looking thoughtful.

"Well, since that bad-tempered blonde with a stick up his ass is using the phone and that white haired kid's entertaining himself," the grey haired man stated, smiling. "Do you wanna fill me in on your travels? I'm sure it's quite a tale, unless Bookmen are forbidden to talk of such matters."

Lavi laughed.

"If you give me some food, I'll tell ya."

"You haven't changed in the slightest!"

And so, whilst happily eating some onigiri, Lavi filled Huí sè in on his years with Bookman for the second time that day. It didn't take nearly as long to get him up to date as it did with Medic and Allen, probably because Lavi didn't have to worry about how he was coming across to Huí sè since he knew him before he started adopting personas, and soon enough Lavi had gotten to the events that he had experienced within the Black Order.

"Ahh, I think I get it now," Huí sè murmured, stretching a little in his chair. "Looks like you and Bookman are gonna be fighting for a while, huh…"

"Probably. But I get the feeling that things are gonna come to the big finale soon enough. We'll be ready for it when it comes."

"But don't you think you're thinking more like an Exorcist than someone simply logging the war?"

Lavi fell silent, looking thoughtful. He sighed.

"Yeah... I guess... I've become too attached to my current persona. What I've experienced as 'Lavi' and the people I have met and grown close to as 'Lavi' have kinda affected the rest of my psyche, if ya get what I mean," the red head explained quietly. "I'm starting to become 'Lavi', opposed to being a combination of 'Bookman Junior' and my current persona."

"I'm... not sure I understand," Huí sè said with a frown. "How can you be more than one person?"

"As a Bookman apprentice, you have a persona and your true self, with the persona being in control of the actions of the body while the base personality, if you like, remains dormant."

"But you mentioned someone called 'Bookman Junior' - is that what you call your base personality?"

"No. I'm... a bit different to the typical Bookman."

"How so?"

"I have a persona, 'Bookman Junior', and three base personalities."

Huí sè fell silent, confused.

"At some point after Bookman started taking care of me, but before I became a Bookman, my psyche split into three different parts," Lavi continued, looking a little awkward. "Gramps told me I was mentally unstable for a while, which could be why I have three base personalities instead of just one."

"And what are they like?" Huí sè asked. "These personalities, I mean."

"Well, one of them is catatonic, another is psychotic and extremely violent, and the last one is devoid of any feeling whatsoever. And 'Bookman Junior' is just a bit of a dick, really."

"I see... I don't think I get it still, but..."

"It's fine. I've never really told anyone about them ya know, so I probably didn't explain myself very well."

At this, Huí sè looked surprised.

"Why tell me of all people first? I know we were close once, but surely you've told Bookman or one of your friends?" the grey haired man questioned, confused. Lavi shook his head.

"If Gramps knew, he'd flip. 'Bookman Junior' isn't meant to be separate from my personas. And my friends... well, they only know me as 'Lavi'; a loud-mouthed, light hearted, immature pervert that has no concept of personal space," the red headed teen murmured, chuckling a little. "'Lavi' isn't one for showing pain, so I couldn't tell them all of this 'cause they'd freak out. But you knew the real me - I have nothing to uphold for you."

Huí sè's expression softened at this. Then, with a smile, he leant forward and ruffled Lavi's hair affectionately.

"You're a very strong person, you know that?" he said, ignoring the red head's protests at his hair being 'ruined'. "Your mother would be proud of you."

Lavi froze. Then, with a small but heartfelt smile, the red head pushed Huí sè's hand off of his head and leant back in his chair, looking thoughtful.

"I hope so, Huí sè, I hope so..."

For a while the both of them were silent, lost in their own thoughts. Then, tentatively, Huí sè stood up and opened a draw in his desk, taking out a key and an envelope. He handed these items to Lavi.

"What's this?" the red head asked, frowning. He opened the envelope carefully, taking care not to rip the paper. His eye widened when he saw the contents.

Inside was a pair of earrings and a photograph - the earrings Lavi did not recognise, and the photo was of himself and his mother. Lavi was a very young baby in the picture, his mother looking exhausted but happy, emerald eyes glittering. Lavi swiped his thumb across the photograph, heart twisting painfully in his chest.

"She wanted to give you those earrings as a 6th birthday present," Huí sè murmured with a sad smile.

Lavi said nothing. Then, wiping his eye with a gloved hand, the red head tucked the photo in his jacket and, taking out his hooped earrings and placing them in his trouser pocket, Lavi put the small silver studs in his ear and smiled.

"Thank you, Huí sè," he said softly, putting the envelope in his pocket and standing up. "But what's the key for?"

"The key is for your old home," the grey haired man answered. "We put a lock on the front door after we... found what we did. Do with it as you will."

As he said this, Huí sè gently ruffled Lavi's hair again and turned towards the door. Then he turned back around to face the teen, one hand on the doorknob, expression serious.

"The truth is yours to find. You know what I mean by that."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Link tapped his foot impatiently, pulling at his ponytail irritably as he waited for the phone to be picked up on the other end. When the ringing sound stopped, the blonde found himself jumping a little for some reason, feeling nervous all of a sudden.

"Hello? Central Administration? This is Inspector Howard Link," the CROW said instantly, shaking his head a little to clear his thoughts.

"Hello Inspector. Have you arrived at your destination?" came the monotone reply, obviously female but sounding robotic at the same time. This had always bothered Link for reasons he couldn't explain; it was as if these phone operators personified the apathy Central felt towards human life and emotion. But why would that bother someone loyal to Central? Link shook his head again, starting to feel angry with himself.

"Yes, we have arrived," he replied, sounding more professional and determined.

"And is there anything to report?"

Link fell silent. There certainly were a few things to report; Lavi, and his somewhat shady past, and his relationship with Allen… Both things were more than relevant to mention to Central, especially considering that Allen could make Lavi turn against the Order with him, and maybe even the other Exorcists, if the 14th took over. It could become a very unfavourable situation for everyone if such a thing happened. But…

A memory from earlier came to the forefront of Link's mind – it was soon after they had left Bookman Clan Headquarters, and the red headed Bookman apprentice and Allen were just walking side by side, smiling and chatting idly about how stuffy the building was, and how Head Archiver looked a little like a male Matron with a beard. Their immaturity had annoyed Link at the time but, looking back, both Lavi and Allen had looked so full of contentment, happy to simply be in each other's company.

Link had felt love before, and came out of the other end wishing he had never bothered in the first place. But he knew the look in their eyes; Lavi and Allen were in love. Deeply so, or at least their feelings were deepening. And, for some reason, the thought of eradicating it bothered Link.

To the point where he would regret it.

"No, there's nothing to report," Link said after a couple of seconds, fists clenching as he spoke. "We should be back at the Order in a couple of days, depending on how long it takes Bookman to decode the poems."

"Understood. Please keep an eye on the 14th, Inspector."

"I will."

And with that, Central hung up. For ages Link simply stood there, still holding the phone to his ear, feeling torn. He told himself it was because he had no clear absolute proof about Lavi and Allen's relationship, and that if he was wrong he would be ruining two lives that need not be ruined.

But Link knew that that was a lie.

"What have I just done?"

This quiet question to himself echoed within the small room that Link was in. Eventually, with a sigh, the blonde put down the phone and decided to simply follow the order of Keeping An Eye On The 14th. Shutting the door behind him, Link left the little room and headed down the hallway towards the main room of the Crossed Swords, grimacing at the sounds coming from within it. Why Lavi had been involved in such a world so young was beyond Link and, if the red head didn't infuriate Link with his very presence, he might have felt sorry for him.

However, Link disliked those who were immature, and the nickname 'Two Spot' didn't sit well with him.

"Ahh, blondie's back!" one of the women cried as he entered the main room, waving to him and giggling as he blushed at her rather bouncy exposed upper half. As Link looked away, embarrassed, he noticed a large group of men and women gathered around a table in the centre of the room. Rolling his eyes and already knowing what was happening, the blonde CROW walked forwards and pushed through the throngs of people.

"Call. Four Of A Kind."

Allen was sitting surrounded by women, a rather large pile of money lying on the table before him. The teen was smiling his trademark 'I'm Innocent… no, really' smile, said smile widening as the men before him cried despairingly at having lost again, handing more money to Allen reluctantly.

"So, cheating more honest men of their money, Walker?" Link asked, looking at the white haired teen before him disapprovingly. Allen laughed.

"I am not cheating, Link. I am simply better at cards than these 'honest men'," Allen replied, silver eyes glinting. He picked up the pile of notes before him and, not saying a word, handed equal shares of the money to the women around him. For a while they stared gobsmacked at the notes placed in their hands. Then, in a succession of squeals and cries of thanks, Allen soon found himself surrounded by women hugging and kissing him. The Exorcist blushed and smiled, saying 'You're welcome' so many times that he began to feel like a broken record.

"Well, shall we go find where Lavi's gotten to?" Allen asked, turning towards Link and rubbing the lipstick off of his face with a sleeve. The blonde CROW nodded, albeit reluctantly. Just as they were about to head towards Huí sè's office, where they had last seen the red head, Huí sè walked out of his office. Standing behind him, looking somewhat shell shocked and oddly nervous, was Lavi.

"Is he okay?" Allen asked the instant the grey haired brothel owner walked past them, concerned. Huí sè stopped and nodded, though there was a sadness in his eyes as he did so.

"Make sure you take care of him?" the man asked, smiling a little. "I don't think he'll be back to see me again."

Allen nodded. Then, without looking back to check if Link was following, the white haired teen headed towards Huí sè's office and stopped as Lavi walked out of it, eye downcast.

"You ready to go?" Allen asked, giving the red head a tentative smile. For a while Lavi did nothing then, with a surety in his eye, he looked up and nodded.

"Yeah. There's something I need to do before we find _féijíchǎng_ and head back to HQ though," Lavi replied. Allen nodded.

"Would you like us to go and tell Medic to wait a bit longer?"

"That'd be good. Thanks, Allen."

"It's fine. You know I'm here for you, don't you?"

Allen's eyes were filled with softness as he said this, making Lavi smile. The red head nodded.

"I know. Now go tell Two Spot what's up, and I'll see you in about an hour or so, 'kay?"

"Sure."

And, with that, Allen headed back towards Link, giving Lavi a parting wave as the red head walked past them and left the building, scarf trailing behind him. Link tilted his head to the side, frowning.

"Where is the Bookman going?" he asked. "Are you not going to stop him?"

"No. He has some business to attend to," Allen replied, smiling a little. "He's going to meet us at the Gate in about an hour. We need to tell Medic."

Though he huffed as Allen said this, looking annoyed, Link nodded his head in agreement. Saying goodbye to the women and Huí sè, who was sitting and consoling the men who had lost their money to Allen, the two of them left the brothel and headed down the street towards the main Gate. After about 15 minutes of walking, they soon found the Gate and a rather impatient looking Medic.

"God, there you are!" Medic cried, running up to them and hugging Allen tightly. The white haired teen cringed. "You've been gone hours, and it's nearly nightfall!"

"We were... delayed," Link said, looking annoyed. "And Bookman Junior now has something of apparent importance to attend to, so we have to wait another hour."

"We can't really afford to wait that long," Medic said quietly, releasing Allen from her death grip. "Walking up the mountains at night is never a good idea."

"It'll be okay - we can always use Lavi's Innocence if we have to," Allen murmured. "Though I don't know how easily it'll be to do it..."

"Did he say where he was going?"

"No."

"So... we're just gonna have to wait?"

"Yep."

"Gahh _baka usagi-chan wa totemo ii nikui desu_!"

And, with that, Medic sat down on the ground with a huff, pouting. Allen and Link turned towards each other and shrugged.

It was going to be a very long hour.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

He was finally there.

The place of his nightmares. The place where he had lost everything. The place that he had not been back to in just under 14 years.

Home.

Lavi clenched his fists, standing and staring at the badly cut wooden door before him, heart beginning to race. It hadn't changed, this fear he felt. Out of all the places he had lived in as a child, Home was the one place he was terrified of returning to.

So why, he found him asking himself, was he standing in front of the door of his first home, key in hand?

Lavi didn't really know. When Huí sè gave him the key, his instant reaction was to go the local well and drop it into its watery depths. But what his grey haired Uncle-figure had said, about finding out the truth, had hit home.

All Lavi had wanted since the death of his mother were explanations. Why did Motoki kill his mother? Why did Motoki hurt him in such a way? Why was it Lavi's fault? What had happened to twist his once kind and loving father-figure into such a monstruous person?

He had never been able to answer these questions. It fueled him, this desire for the truth. It was why the role of a Bookman had initially been so appealing. Knowing the hidden history, knowing the unarguable facts of time, knowing the truth about the world; it made Lavi forget the truths that he wanted to know above all else.

And now, at the age of 19, he could finally learn what happened.

So why was he so frightened? Because he was scared of what the truth actually was.

Lavi had come up with so many theories about why Motoki had done what he did. He had always hoped that there had been a reason why, that Motoki hadn't killed his mother and raped him for the sake of it. But at least he could hope for such a thing. If he found out the truth, his hope would either bloom or be crushed. And Lavi had no idea what he would do with the truth once he obtained it.

Nor if he was willing to use something that he had forbidden himself to use to obtain the truth.

"God damn it..."

The red head clenched his fists tighter, shutting his eye and gritting his teeth. He had to know. He had to finally know why. But he was so scared of what Motoki's motive was.

_You know I'm here for you, don't you?_

Lavi froze as this memory suddenly came to mind, remembering the softness in Allen's eyes as he had asked him that question. The fear within him began to dissipate, his heart beating slower. Lavi sighed, unclenching his fists and staring down at the key in his hand morosely.

No matter what truths Lavi would find beyond the door before him, Allen would be there for him at the end. He would be concerned of course, silver eyes filled with worry and unasked questions. But, no matter how concerned he became, Lavi knew for certain that Allen wouldn't ask him about what had happened whatsoever. He'd smile, tell him it'll be okay, maybe squeeze his hand with a whisper of 'Keep going'.

Because Allen knew that everyone needed their secrets.

Lavi smiled. He felt a rush of determination within him, telling him to walk forward and find out the truth after years of waiting. He still felt nervous and fearful; there was no changing that. However, Lavi knew that he wasn't alone.

"I have to do this."

So, with key in hand, Lavi stepped forward. The lock on the door before him was rusted as anything, barely holding itself together. Lavi rolled his eyes, pocketing the key with a chuckle. With a sharp hit from his hammer, the lock shattered into many pieces that fell to the ground with a clatter. The door opened slightly on its own, the darkness within calling to Lavi like a forbidden siren.

Taking a deep breath in, Lavi pushed the door open and stepped inside.

The first thing that hit him was an abominable stench, making him choke and turn away towards the open air behind him. Covering his mouth and nose with his scarf, Lavi turned back around and noticed with a jolt the dried congealed blood on the floor in front of him. There was no body there, but Lavi could clearly picture Motoki's corpse lying over the blood, eyes wide and unseeing.

Though part of Lavi wished Huí sè had cleaned the place up, or at least gotten someone else to do it, Lavi was almost glad that the blood was still there.

He could find out the truth very easily this way.

Trying not to gag, Lavi walked forwards and stepped over the dried puddle of blood, heading down the hallway. The kitchen was dirty, dust covering the broken tiles on the floor like snow made of ash. Lavi's old bedroom was in a similar state. When Lavi reached the door to his mother's bedroom, he winced; the blood remained in that room also, the bed stained a dark brown.

Flashbacking without even realising he was doing so, Lavi found himself running out of the room and down the hall, heart thudding hard and fast in his chest. With a yelp he slipped on the blood near the front door and crashed to the ground face first.

He felt panic rise within him and, eye wide, Lavi sat up and promptly threw up everywhere. The bile stung his throat, and his eye was watering by the time he stopped retching. Breathing hard, Lavi moved out of the puddle, leaning against the wall tiredly.

"Great, now it all smells even worse..."

As he said this, Lavi found himself laughing despite it all, wiping his mouth with a hand. Closing his eye, Lavi took several deep breaths, becoming calmer and more in control with each inhale and exhale. When the red head felt his heart slow to its normal rate, he opened his eye and moved into a sitting position in front of the puddle of blood.

His hands shook as he raised them towards his eyepatch.

With a sigh, he pulled down the black fabric covering his right eye, letting it dangle from his neck on top of his bandana. Keeping his right eye closed, Lavi moved his hands and rested them on top of the congealed blood before him, shuddering at the feel of it against his bare fingers. Unable to calm himself, Lavi's heart began to race. He felt excited yet nervous, terrified yet determined.

14 years of doubt were about to be erased.

Lavi opened his right eye.

At first, nothing. Then the information came to him slowly, like pouring cold treacle into a bowl. Lavi dug his fingers into the bloody puddle, eyes half lidded, heart thumping hard in his chest. The memories were faint, overlayed with the imprint of horrified people walking over the blood, a body being pulled through it, tears from women trying to keep themselves together. In his mind's eye, he managed to discern the memories he wanted; Motoki's.

Suddenly, a sharp twinge from his right eye made Lavi cry out. He shut it, lifting his hands away from the blood and touching the eyelid gingerly with trembling fingers.

"Guess I can't just use it off the bat, huh..."

Lavi sighed. He hadn't used his eye in years, so to use it all of a sudden was probably too much for it.

It was his secret, his abnormality, his curse. To see all that had been; that was the power of his right eye. It could trace back all the memories associated with an object, no matter how long it had been separated from the human it was connected to. Motoki's blood held an imprint of Motoki himself - his life, his experiences, his memories. Lavi could use his eye to trace back to the day his mother died and discover what really happened to Motoki.

Lavi had had this power since birth. At first his mother didn't believe his ramblings about the things he could see, always asking him why he kept shutting his right eye and staggering. It was too much for him, seeing through both eyes all the time. And, when his mother finally realised what was going on, she saved up for and bought an eyepatch to cover Lavi's right eye. Nonetheless she preferred Lavi not wearing it, for her favourite colour was blue and so was the colour of Lavi's right eye.

With it covered, he only had perfect recall - he was able to remember everything he saw in detail with absolute certainty. But he couldn't access his full powers, the eyepatch dulling it down enough to allow him to go about his day-to-day life with as much normality as he could.

"One more time!"

Opening his right eye with a wince, Lavi once more placed his fingers on top of the blood, taking in a deep breath. Though his eye was soon throbbing painfully, making Lavi grit his teeth, the red head ignored it and called to the power within him. Soon the memories were back, rushing into Lavi's mind like a torrent of fast-flowing water.

Firstly, he saw his mother - green eyes glinting, her soft expression whilst she slept, her laughter as she swung Lavi round in circles. Gentle kisses and murmurs of 'I love you', tears and pain at the demeaning job she had to keep doing. It pained Lavi, for all of Motoki's memories to do with his mother were full of love and adoration. If he had loved her, why did he kill her?

Next, Lavi saw himself. Young, inquisitive, trusting and ever so naïve. All happiness and sunshine smiles, simply to keep his mother happy. But there was pain in his single visible eye, and bitterness too. Motoki believed firmly, and almost sadly, that Lavi had always wanted to have a better life, but knew that he was never going to get one.

Lavi gritted his teeth, the pain in his right eye increasing. He hadn't even reached the memories he most wanted to see, yet he felt as if he had to stop.

"Not... just yet..." Lavi ground out, digging his fingers into the congealed bloody puddle before him. He desperately filtered deeper, trying to find the memories of his mother's death.

Then he saw the Earl.

Lavi was so shocked by this that he fell backwards, the connection breaking between his eye and Motoki's memories. His heart thudded fast in his chest, his breathing rate increasing as time passed.

Motoki had worked for the Earl.

Closing his right eye but keeping his left open, Lavi numbly processed the memories he had seen, picking through them carefully, trembling as the truth began to piece itself together. It seemed so outlandish, yet believable at the same time. Lavi found himself unable to dismiss what he had seen as false.

Motoki had worked for the Noah Clan, finding Innocence in much the same way as the Finders of the Black Order. When he found a fragment of Innocence, he used a small communication device similar to Tyki's butterflies to contact a Noah so that he or she could destroy it.

Motoki lied to the Earl. He said he had no family, no ties to humanity. It was to protect Lavi and his mother, for Motoki feared that the Noah could use them against him. Lavi winced as he discovered this, holding his head in his hands.

One day, Motoki saw a few Exorcists in the town where he was located. Instead of telling the Noah, he thought that the Akuma would be able to take care of them.

They didn't.

The Akuma were destroyed, and the Exorcists managed to retrieve the Innocence in the town and send it to the Black Order. And Motoki was punished for it.

The Earl was merciless, feeling no sympathy for Motoki as he begged for his life. He gave Motoki a choice - to die, and become an Akuma as Lavi's mother grieved for him. Or he could live, and completely and utterly lose his sanity.

And Lavi knew which option Motoki had picked.

"_Kàn mā dè_..."

Lavi scarcely noticed the tears rolling down his cheeks, heart twisting painfully in his chest. For, no matter what Motoki had done, Lavi knew that he had already forgiven the man for it.

And he hated himself for doing so.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Where the hell is he ? !"

Medic stormed back and forth, eyes glinting with pent-up frustration, lips pursed, hands clenched tightly into fists. It had been hours since Allen and Link began to wait with Medic at the Gate, nightfall descending upon them swiftly. The pitch black darkness unnerved all three of them, and Lavi continuing to be going about his business worried both Medic and Allen severely.

"He'll be back soon," Allen replied, smiling unconvincingly. The white haired teen was so obviously worried that it made Link want to shake him and tell him to man up.

Link remained silent though, leaning against one of the Gate's pillars, eyes closed in thought. The blonde was not worried - Lavi meant nothing more to him than being one of the Order's Exorcists. But he knew that they couldn't afford to wait any longer.

"We'll head back to HQ without him," Link stated, opening his eyes and stepping forwards. Both Medic and Allen turned towards him, outraged.

"Like hell we are!" Medic snapped, stomping forwards and grabbing the front of Link's coat. "We will wait for _baka usagi-chan_ as long as it takes."

"What if he doesn't come back?"

"What do you mean, 'if he doesn't come back'?" Allen demanded, eyes narrowing. "Of course Lavi's coming back."

"What if he decided to stay with his old friends?" Link answered, tone sharp. "Being both a Bookman and an Apostle has never sat well with him, am I wrong?"

Link was met with silence.

"Would you not blame him for wanting to just be himself?"

Again, silence. Link continued, his frustration towards waiting for so long coming to the boil.

"We've been waiting here for hours! And what if Bookman Junior doesn't come back? Will you stand and wait here forever, Walker?"

"Yes."

The firmness with which Allen said this made Link fall silent. The white haired teen walked up to Link and gently pushed Medic away from him, smiling.

"Lavi has never once abandoned his duty as an Exorcist, despite whatever misgivings he may have had at the time. He has always been there for his comrades, and fought until he could do so no more. Are you really suggesting that Lavi would ever abandon us, just like that? Or that we should just leave and abandon him, like he means nothing at all to any of us?"

"Well Two-Spot certainly wants to, doesn't he!"

Medic, Allen and Link all turned. Standing a few metres away was Lavi, grinning his trademark grin and holding his hands behind the back of his head.

"Sorry I took so l-"

The red head got no further, for both Allen and Medic punched Lavi hard in the face, both looking furiously angry. Lavi gulped.

"Where the fuck have you been ? !"

"We've been really worried, idiot!"

"It's nightfall now! How the hell are we going to get back?"

"And you just waltz back here, without a care in the world!"

"Do you want me to strangle you ? !"

"HOW STUPID ARE YOU ? !"

Medic and Allen fell silent, both huffing with clenched fists. Lavi backed away slightly, looking fearful.

"Ummm... I'm sorry?"

Allen sighed, walking forwards and helping the red head up.

"Let's just get going, stupid Lavi."

The red head smiled, nodding. Rubbing his face as he stood up, Lavi walked out of the town's Gate alongside Allen. Link and Medic, after both sighing exasperatedly and muttering, joined them.

It took an hour or so to reach the foothills of the mountain again, the darkness heavy around them. Without saying a word, Lavi headed up one of the mountain paths and beckoned the others to follow.

"Once we get to higher ground, I'll use my hammer to get us back to Headquarters," Lavi stated, grinning. Allen and Link nodded, whilst Medic just laughed nervously.

About an hour after they started heading up the mountain, Lavi brought them to a stop, frowning.

"I think we'll be okay here."

Lavi took out his hammer and activated it, laughing at Medic's gobsmacked expression.

"Big hammer, little hammer, grow grow grow!"

Soon enough, Lavi's Innocence was huge. Lavi turned towards Allen, smiling.

"Ne, beansprout, how long can you extend your Crown Belt?"

"I'm not a beansprout!"

"Answer the damn question, Walker!"

"About as far as you can extend your hammer, I reckon. Why?"

Lavi grinned.

"I need ya to pull us along and move the base of the hammer as we move upwards!" the red head stated, looking pleased with himself. Allen looked dubious, but he activated his Innocence anyway and stepped onto the hammer's head beside Lavi. Link followed, sighing.

"I'm gonna need a real big drink after this," Medic grumbled, looking at both Allen's transformed arm and Lavi's hammer with anxiety. Nonetheless she stepped onto the hammer's head.

"Rightho!" Lavi cried, grinning. "Ready, Allen?"

"Almost. Crown Belt!"

With a thud several strands from Allen's belt dug into the ground, with several more wrapping around Lavi's hammer tightly. Allen turned to the red head beside him and nodded.

"Alright, everyone grab onto the handle!" Lavi said, adjusting his bandana with his free hand. Obeying, Allen, Link and Medic did as Lavi asked. With a last look at the town, rubbing the studs in his ears fondly, Lavi closed his eye and smiled.

_I know you're proud of me,_ _māmā..._

"Extend!"

The handle shot upwards, wind rushing around them.

_And Motoki..._

Allen pulled on his belt tightly, gritting his teeth as he did so. The handle moved rightwards, avoiding an approaching precipice. Lavi looked downwards at the ground below and laughed.

_I forgive you._

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

māmā = mother (mandarin chinese)

féijíchǎng = flat chested (mandarin chinese)

Baka usagi-chan wa totemo ii nikui desu! = The stupid rabbit's so awkward! (japanese)

kàn mā dè = goddammit (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Sorry that this chapter was kinda crap T-T I've had a really rough couple of days... On a lighter note, the plot from now on will be fully concentrated on the poems and the Heart, so Lavi's past is officialy over with. I'll try and update soon! Love you ~**

**xrowa-chanx**


	10. Update news

Heya everyone ~ !

Yeah, I'm afraid this isn't an update =_=

Things have gotten pretty hectic lately for me… and not entirely in a bad way ahaha, but you know – still busy XD My exams are coming up, and they're reaaaally important ones – if I fail them, my entire career choice is screwed ^^" So I'm sorry but I'm gonna be on hiatus for the next two months. When my exams are finished I'll update again.

Thank you to Hanashi o suru, Geeres, Stavarn100, bakaxusagi, Toxic Rain42, Allena Moyashi Walker, Athena Keating-Thomas, Angel Fantasy, kh07gl, Foschidelic Reika, animeobsessed001, sammi117, Raiji Magiwind and Uniasus for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing the latest chapter ~

And thank you in general to everyone who's been supporting me so far, and I hope you'll have the patience to wait until I'm able to write again :'3 Much love for all of you ~ !

And, on a random note, R.I.P. Edd Gould - your animations and comics were awesome beyond measure, and I feel honoured to have been able to have met you at a comic con a year or so ago - I hope your afterlife is full of bacon, cola and sandwiches ~ !

xrowa-chanx


	11. Update news 2

Hey everyone ~

Just an update to let you know that I'll be able to start writing again by next weekend! *dances* Exams are almost over T^T

And thanks for the comments/favourites/subscriptions while I've been away *heart* Thankyou to animeobsessed001, kh07gl, sammi117, ThorongilAnime, bakaxusagi, Akai Angel, LemurianCitizen, Youko Koenma, MarinneKarneval and Ritsuka119 ~ :'3

Oh! To let you guys know, there are a few points in the plot that I'm unhappy with so I'm gonna do a bit of editing/shifting around of chapters ~ The only big change is gonna be Marie's death, so dw about everything suddenly going doolally XD I just thought, looking back, it didn't really work ~ ^^"

So yeah, thankyou for your continued support and I hope I can get a new chappie out by two weeks time at the latest :')

Much love to you all ~ !

xrowa-chanx


	12. Chapter 10: Between The Lines

**Heya guys ~ ! *grins* It has been far too long since I updated this =_= But, luckily, my exams (except for one more at the end of this month) are finished *heart* So I can now write and update, yeay! XD Thank you so much to everyone who's supported me during my 2 months hiatus, and enjoy the chapter everyone :'3 **

**NOTE: I really want an image header for this fic, but I have the drawing/editing talent of a fish ^^" So, to you artists out there: contact me if you want to make me one? Please? With cherries on top? I'll write you something (maybe some *cough* Laven smut *cough cough*) :L**

**Thank you to Stavarn100, MidnightAbyssx02, Ookamikyo, storyandstories, Kimura Yumi, and XenoKosMos for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing. And thank you to MidnightAbyssx02 for help with my Chinese ~ :'3**

**Also, I advise rereading the first few chappies - I've made a few changes :') I haven't edited chapter 4 onwards, so dw about the ones after that XD haha**

**AND ~~~ 100th reviewer gets a oneshot ;')**

**And I lost your fic, Stavarn100 - I'll rewrite it at some point ;_;**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Do what you, what you want_

'_Til you find what you're looking for._

_Got to remember who you really are._

_But every hour slipping by screams that I have failed you._

_Hello, hello, remember me? I'm everything you can't control._

_Somewhere beyond the pain there must be a way to believe._

Evanescence - What You Want

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 10 - Between The Lines

"Where _have_ you been ? !"

"Well, you see..."

"We got a bit lost."

"Or rather Allen-chan got us a bit lost."

"I didn't get us lost! It's all Lavi's fault!"

"My fault ? ! How was I supposed to see that dead end when it was miles away, stupid beansprout!"

"The name's Allen!"

"Though you really shouldn't have squished those peasants, _baka usagi-chan_..."

"They shoulda moved! We weren't hard to miss!"

"It's your fault, Bookman Junior. Get over it."

"No-one asked your opinion, Two Spot!"

"Oh? And who was the one who spent hours off somewhere and left us waiting until dark to leave?"

"ENOUGH!"

Everyone flinched as Bookman shouted, backing away as the old man's eyes glittered with anger.

"I do not want to hear these feeble excuses!" he snapped, glaring at everyone, (though at Lavi especially). "You should have been back hours ago. Now get inside!"

And with that Bookman left them standing just outside of the doors of Bookman Headquarters, the old man grumbling venomously as he stomped inside. Lavi and Allen both sighed.

"Let's just get inside," Lavi murmured, placing his Innocence back in its holster. "Before Gramps decides to skin us alive..."

So, exhausted from their 'exciting' journey back to HQ, the four of them trudged inside and headed down the long corridor that led to the lift. None of them spoke along the way, though Allen, Link and Medic were all still burning with curiosity over where Lavi had gone. Lavi himself felt rather content as he led the others deeper inside the building. Unlike that morning, where the memories of his past burned within him like a fire gone out of control, Lavi felt nothing but peace.

For he wasn't the monster that he and everyone else believed him to be.

"You're out mighty late, Bookman," the lift operator murmured as they reached the lift. His eyes narrowed and grew suspicious when he noticed the others standing behind Bookman. "Where have you been?"

"It is none of your concern," Bookman replied harshly. The lift operator fell silent. Wordlessly, the man stood aside and let the five of them enter the lift.

"Where to?"

"Dormitory Level."

With a clang the gates shut and the lift moved downwards, the chains holding it up clinking as it dropped slowly. The passengers were silent as the lift moved, but said silence wasn't awkward or overpowering; all of them were lost in their own thoughts.

"Here you go," the lift operator murmured, bowing his head respectively. Bookman simply nodded in reply. The five of them quietly got off of the lift, leaving its operator to go back upwards on his own.

The Dormitory Level was deserted; not a single person could be seen in the corridor. The sound of Medic sighing echoed loudly.

"I've gotta go drop these off and head to my room," Medic said with a yawn, re-adjusting her hold on the bag in her hands with a quiet rustle of paper. "_Oyasuminasai_ Bookman, Link, Allen-chan, _baka usagi-chan_."

"'Night _féijíchǎng_!" Lavi said cheerfully, giving the brunette woman his trademark grin. "Don't let the bed bugs bite!"

Laughing in amusement and giving the others a little wave, Medic walked away and headed up the stairs to the infirmary. Once she left, Bookman opened the door to the room the four of them were going to be sharing, and let the others inside before shutting the door behind them.

Without saying a word the old man walked up to the bed furthest away from the door, sat down on it, and took out his beloved pipe. Link picked the bed closest to the door and gave Lavi and Allen a glare before slumping down on it and lying down. Being left with the two center beds, the two teens gave each other a smile and a quick murmur of 'good night' before lying down and preparing for sleep's calming slumber.

Before long, the two teenagers were asleep. Link stayed up for a while, watching the both of them like an eagle would watch its prey, but eventually got into bed and went to sleep – dealing with the two teenage Exorcists had taken a lot out of him. Bookman, however, did not sleep – he had noticed the different air around his apprentice, and also noticed that Lavi was holding onto something inside of his jacket. And the hoops that Bookman had allowed the red head to buy a few years back were replaced by tiny studs that Bookman did not recognise.

The old man was suspicious.

As time passed, and Bookman continued to ponder and frown at his sleeping apprentice, he noticed the red head stirring in his sleep, his features contorting into a frown. Lavi rolled onto one side, then the other, making small noises of fear and what Bookman could distinguish as "I'm sorry", said so quietly that the old man had to strain his ears to hear it. After a few more minutes, Lavi stopped moving and sighed, single eye opening to reveal a green iris filled with pain.

Bookman frowned at the emotion shown in his apprentice's features – from the pain in his eye, to the way he clutched at the front of his jacket with small pants, to the way the red head was just about stopping himself from crying. And as the red head turned to face Allen, Bookman started to realise that Lavi had been 'Lavi' for far too long.

When the old man knew that the red head was definitely asleep, he got up and left the room silently. Heading down the deserted corridors of the Dormitory floor, Bookman tried not to think of the consequences of moving on, and his own curiosity about the poems, and how heartbroken his apprentice would be to move on and lose his current persona – nonetheless, they had been at the Order for too long.

Using the stairs instead of the lift, Bookman headed down to the library, quietly lit a candle and sat down in a plush armchair. Lighting his pipe for the second time that evening, the old man took a deep breath in of nicotine-filled smoke and let out the smoke in a perfect ring. After a few more puffs from his pipe, Bookman got up and walked towards the back of the library, taking a candle with him to light his way. As the minutes passed, he eventually reached the oldest part of the library, where the most ancient of texts were kept. Eventually, Bookman stopped and placed the candle on a shelf near his head.

With deft fingers, the old man perused through the volumes before him, murmuring their titles as he pushed the tomes away. Then, when he had almost reached the end of the shelf, Bookman found what he was looking for.

Picking up the heavy book, coughing a little at the dust that was expelled into the air as he pulled it off the shelf, Bookman made his way back to the seating area of the library. When he reached his chosen desk and chair, he sat down with the book and flicked through the pages until he found what he was looking for.

_Erasure of long-term personalities._

Some things had to be done.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Blinking sleepily and wondering where Bookman had gone, Lavi lay in his bed and resisted the urge to wake Allen up. He should have expected that his sleep would not go undisturbed that night, considering the events of the day, but he had been so tired after their eventful journey back from town that he hadn't even worried about what sleep would bring.

_Have you forgotten me?_

It hadn't been a nightmare. It wasn't frightening enough, or horrible enough to be considered one. But it had not been a pleasant dream – it left Lavi feeling cold and empty inside, making him clutch the photo of him and his mother in his jacket pocket.

_Why didn't you stay with me?_

It had been years since Lavi had dreamt of his mother. When he was younger, he dreamt of her often. His dreams had always been of pleasant memories, his mind shutting out the horrible events that parted him from his family. As Lavi got older, his dreams became more horrible and violent – he began to remember more clearly, though he tried to hide this from Bookman. The old man had probably heard his screams in the night; it would have been impossible not to be woken by them. It was probably the reason why Bookman kept changing his personas on a regular basis as he got older.

Erasing personalities was a great distraction to Lavi's psyche, after all.

As this came to mind, Lavi shuddered. He had always hated having his personas erased. The persona never went willingly, and it often took Bookman an entire day or more of near constant wrestling with his mind to make the persona break free.

And then Bookman had to deal with Lavi's true selves afterwards.

At first Bookman refused to tell Lavi why he woke up restrained after having his persona erased. The red head never remembered the events that occurred, only the feeling of being exhausted and utterly drained. But, as Lavi became more aware of his state of mind, he realised that his true selves were just as unwilling to be forced out of control as his personas.

Shifting so that he was lying on his side, Lavi sighed and turned to stare at the sleeping form of Allen in the nearby bed. The white haired teen had a very peaceful expression, lids moving slightly as he dreamt, his lips slightly parted as he breathed in and out slowly and deeply. The sight of Allen looking so calm made Lavi smile. Almost unconsciously, the red head reached out and stroked the side of Allen's face, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear and chuckling quietly as Allen moved slightly in his sleep.

Then, glancing at the prone form of Link in the next bed, and knowing that he could easily roll onto the floor if Bookman came back, Lavi got out of bed and clambered carefully into Allen's. Gently lying beside the white haired teen, Lavi sighed and buried his face in the crook of Allen's shoulder, breathing in the boy's almost sweet-smelling scent. Before the red head realised it, his eye started to droop and he fell soundly asleep, one arm wrapped loosely around Allen's waist and the other propped underneath his head.

The night passed undisturbed.

The next morning dawned and Link woke up at 5am sharp, as he did every morning, sitting up and stretching. Glancing to his right, Link froze as he spotted Lavi's empty bed and the familiar tufts of red hair visible at Allen's shoulder. The blonde scowled and stomped up to the pair of them, who were still deeply asleep.

Then, taking a deep breath, Link snuck up right beside them.

"WAKE UP!"

With a yelp, Lavi shot upwards and fell off of the bed, single green eye wide with surprise. Allen sat up sharply and gazed around with bleary wide eyes, blinking repeatedly and wondering what the hell had just happened.

"What on Earth do you think you're doing ? !" Link snapped, glaring at the two of them and crossing his arms. "If you do not provide a solid explanation as to why I caught you in… such a fashion…"

Allen carried on blinking, looking more and more confused as he looked between the furious Link and the still sleepy and utterly bewildered Lavi sitting on the floor.

"… Huh?"

"What do you _mean_, 'huh'?"

"Exactly that. … Huh?"

"Stop saying 'huh' ? !"

"But I don't understand what you're talking about!"

"Same here, Two Spot."

"I AM NOT TWO SPOT!"

The blonde CROW was beginning to go red in the face, eyes narrowed and his mouth a thin line as he struggled to keep his anger in check. Just as Link prepared to give both Exorcists one hell of a lecture, that was sure to give them headaches to last a lifetime, Bookman opened the door to the bedroom and stood in the doorway with his usual apathetic countenance.

"What is all this racket about?" Bookman demanded, narrowing his eyes at the fuming CROW and the two bewildered teens sitting in front of him.

"I caught your -"

"MORNNIIIIINNNNGGGG ~ !"

Everyone jumped as Medic suddenly burst into the room, knocking Bookman over and sending him flying into Link. The brunette smiled sheepishly and helped the old man up.

"_Gomen nasai_, Bookman," Medic apologised, bowing her head respectfully.

"It's fine..." Bookman muttered. "May I ask what you are doing here?"

"Oh! I wanted to get Allen-chan to help me upstairs after breakfast," Medic replied, smiling. Allen blinked then gave an affirmative nod and returned the smile.

"Then you can help me with these poems then, brat," Bookman said, kicking Lavi in the head for good measure before leaving the room. Lavi pouted and scowled.

"Bloody _lǎo toúzi_..."

Dragging Allen with him, muttering and rubbing his face as he went (and missing the dark look that Link gave him as he left), Lavi headed to the Cafeteria. The corridors were busy and full of people, and the two Exorcists had a hard time making it to the stairs. Allen wondered why they weren't using the lift, but he had noticed that people were still glaring at Lavi and he guessed that his friend didn't want anymore contact with the members of the Bookman Clan than necessary.

Heading up a few flights of stairs, Lavi and Allen soon came to the Cafeteria. It was packed with people, and the pair of them knew it would be a while before they would be able to sit down and eat.

Allen's stomach grumbled loudly in protest.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Innocence Activate!"

Swiping two fingers along the length of the ruby-coloured blade, Kanda entered into a battle stance. Before him, an array of wooden training dummies stood. Standing on the sidelines, the Science Department, Komui and Lvellie stood and prepared to take notes. They had done the same for Lenalee after her Innocence evolved.

Now it was Kanda's turn.

"You may begin," Lvellie called, eyes narrowed. Kanda scowled and gripped his anti-Akuma weapon tighter.

Leaping forwards, Kanda darted and dodged around the dummies, slicing at them with Mugen quicker than the eye could follow. Soon, piles of wood littered the ground. Komui noticed, writing on a piece of paper in his spidery handwriting as Kanda fought, that Kanda's Innocence seemed almost flexible and fluid-like, not retaining solidity. Mugen seemed to flow as he attacked, swerving towards his target before he even reached it. It definately proved that Kanda's Innocence followed his mind opposed to simply being a weapon that Kanda wielded and controlled consciously.

Suddenly, a secret dummy that Komui had prepared dropped from the ceiling and landed right beside Kanda, a mock weapon directed straight at the teen's head. Almost simultaneously, Kanda cut the dummy in half. Even he seemed surprised by his own reaction time.

"Excellent," Lvellie purred, eyes glinting excitedly. "His Innocence reacts quicker than he does."

"Indeed," Komui replied, voice quiet. Kanda had demolished all of the dummies, and looked decidely pissed at continuing to be watched like a sort of test subject.

"Need more?" he asked bluntly, scowling at the group observing him. Komui shook his head.

"That's fine. Thank you, Kanda."

Sheathing his Innocence, Kanda walked towards the exit. The air outside of the Training Hall was pleasantly cool, and the raven haired Exorcist made his way slowly through the corridors of the Black Order, feeling ill at ease. He hated being the focus of everyone's attention, with them all poking and prodding him for more information on his Innocence. It pissed him off, to say the least.

_I'm fighting of my own volition now._

Was that really true? Did Kanda really want to fight for the Order of his own accord? As this came to mind, the raven haired teen snorted with amusement and shook his head slightly as he continued to walk. No. Kanda did not want to fight for the Black Order. They meant nothing to him, and they only cared for his ability to fight.

That didn't bother Kanda in the slightest.

But, as he made his way to the Dorms, Kanda knew that he fought for something; for the woman he had yet to find, and his comrades. His 'nakama'. Albeit he despised quite a few of them, namely two particular Exorcists, the reason his Innocence evolved was because of Lenalee.

This didn't sit well with Kanda, and he scowled as he reached his room and opened the door before him.

Comrades could die. They were fighting in a war, and most don't survive them. Using his comrades as motivation would only lead to failure if they all died. So, entering his room, closing the door behind him, and sitting down on his rarely used bed, Kanda decided he wouldn't rely on his 'nakama'.

Kanda would rely on himself, like he had always done. Because, ultimately, he could only trust himself.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Library of the Bookmen was quiet, the silence punctuated solely by the sounds of soft breathing, a few people talking quietly amongst themselves, and quills scratching against parchment. Diligently reading and studying the words before them, master and apprentice tried to unravel what was being hidden from them.

"The numbers must mean something," Bookman murmured, looking for the umpteenth time at the coded first poem. Lavi nodded, rubbing his eye tiredly.

"I still think there could be a sequence between the numbers; a sort of pattern that we're missing."

"But you clarified that there_ is _no connection between them."

"I don't know! We're obviously missing something!"

"That much is obvious, brat!"

"_Wàngbāgāozi_!"

"_Rǔ xiù wèi gān_!"

Both Bookman and Lavi sighed, feeling tetchy after an hour of no progress. They had gone through such things before, and solved them eventually. But it was still very frustrating, and the progress that was made hour by hour was slow indeed. The longest it had taken the two of them to decode something was 1 month.

Neither wished for that to happen again.

Lavi rested his head in his hands, staring at the parchment before him with his single eye narrowed in thought. The numbers were not meant to make it harder for the reader to decode the poem, but to give the reader something else; what this something was, Lavi didn't know. All he had gathered from Bookman was that the three locations they had visited thus far, and what year they had been built or became historically important, was connected in some way to the poem.

"In a way I wish we were still in the Order," Bookman muttered, leaning back in his chair. Lavi cocked his head and frowned.

"Why?" he asked. "Didn't we come here mainly to decode the poems?"

"Idiot!" Bookman snapped, whacking Lavi atop the head. "We came here to check in with the Clan, as you well know. And you certainly made a good impression to them all, didn't you."

"He still deserved it," Lavi said quietly, green eye flashing with anger. "That _lǎo bù sǐde_ was trying to rile me."

"And you fell for it like a fool."

Bookman's reply made Lavi fall silent. The red head rubbed his head, eye narrowed. After a few minutes of silence, Lavi turned towards his master.

"So… why do you want to be in the Order right now?" he asked, tone curious. Bookman snorted and stroked his hair idly as he looked to one side, gazing thoughtfully out a nearby window.

"There might be something on the original documents that I have not copied," the old man answered. "We might just be wasting our time trying to analyse these copies of the poems."

"But, if we had the originals…" Lavi murmured, looking thoughtful. Bookman nodded.

"We could make more progress than we are currently."

For a while both members of the Bookman Clan were silent, lost in their own thoughts. Then, as they sat in quiet thought, Lavi realised something.

His eye.

Looking at the copies, eye narrowed, Lavi knew that it would take them quite a while to figure out what the poems were trying to tell them. But, if they had the originals, and if Lavi used his right eye to trace the poems' history…

"Ne, Gramps…"

Bookman turned towards his apprentice.

"Yes, brat?"

"Could we use Allen to make a Gate back to the Order?"

"… What are you thinking?"

Though Lavi was good, much better than most, at analysing people and their body language, Bookman was much much better than his apprentice; he could easily tell that Lavi had an idea.

For a minute or two the red head was silent, looking slightly conflicted. Then, with a determined glint in his single eye, he looked up and met the eyes of his master.

"If I used my right eye on the originals, we would be able to find out who wrote the poems in the first place, right?"

Bookman's eyes widened.

"You…"

Lavi had forbidden himself from using his right eye many years prior, despite Bookman continuously asking him to use it when things became difficult. Bookman had always thought that his red headed apprentice was afraid of the power his eye held, and the boy had refused to ever let Bookman see what was under his eye patch. Then, two or so years before joining the Black Order, Lavi admitted to him one night, whilst travelling under the starlit skies somewhere in Eastern Europe, that his eye had led to the deaths of his family.

He blamed himself for it, and refused to use the gift, or curse, that he had been given because it had ripped his whole life apart.

Bookman, of course, scolded the boy and told him that Bookmen had no home, no name, and no past; unbiased observers of history, standing on the side-lines of time. To blame himself for something that he shouldn't even remember or deem important went against Bookman code. And the gift of perfect hindsight was one that Lavi would be stupid not to use.

Bookman dropped the subject, however, when one of Lavi's true selves came to the fore and promptly threatened him with a knife.

So, now, to hear his apprentice suggest using his eye so casually, as if he didn't mind using it at all, sent alarm bells ringing within Bookman's mind. What had happened to Lavi to drastically change his opinion on his ability?

"There's a lot that you're hiding from me, Lavi…" Bookman muttered, eyes narrowed.

"I know…" came the quiet response from his apprentice.

The red head looked a little nervous, almost a little scared too. But there was a determination in the red head's eye, and a challenging nature to his countenance as he sat and looked directly at Bookman.

"Well…" Bookman began after a while, looking away and rolling the copies of the poems up as he talked. "This is not the first time that you have kept secrets from me."

"Yes," Lavi confirmed, looking a little guilty now as he looked down at his gloved hands.

"And I have let you keep a few, even if they got you in trouble later."

Lavi flinched. He knew what Bookman was referring to, and also what he could be referring to as well; the image of Allen came to mind, and the red head swallowed uneasily, avoiding eye contact with his master.

"Yes."

"I shall not ask what has changed you so."

As Bookman said this, Lavi let out a breath that he hadn't realised he had been holding. But he wasn't stupid – he knew what was coming.

"But heed me, brat – when it comes out in the open, do not expect me to go easy on you."

And, with that, the old man stood up and walked away, taking the poems with him. For a while, Lavi simply sat and looked at his hands, eye closed. Then, sighing, the red headed Exorcist stood up and headed out of the library.

This wasn't the first time that he had hidden things from Bookman, nor would it be the last. And he knew that eventually the old man would find out about his visit to his old home, and about Allen. But everyone had things that they needed to hide; things that they just couldn't reveal to certain people, no matter what consequences would arise from doing so.

Lavi was only human, after all.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"All done!"

With a relieved sigh, Medic and Allen sat back and slumped against the wall behind them. The infirmary was now completely spotless, and was more organised than Medic had seen it in years.

"Thanks for the help, Allen-chan!" Medic cried, hugging the white haired teen beside her, despite his protests at the contact. When she let go, Allen gave her a strained smile.

"Shall we go and eat some lunch?" Medic asked, grinning. Allen perked up instantly, and nodded eagerly; his stomach had been growling for quite a while, and the thought of food (and maybe seeing Lavi as well) was very comforting.

"Let's go!"

Heading out of the room, with Medic locking it behind them, the two of them took the lift downstairs until they reached the floor that the Cafeteria was on. The corridors were again teeming with people, and both Medic and Allen found it quite difficult to navigate their way through the throngs of Clan members. Eventually they entered the large hall, and joined the queue for food.

It took a very long time, but eventually they could order their food, with Medic gawping at the unbelievable amount of things that Allen asked for. They then tried to find a table to sit at, and found Lavi sitting alone at a table nearby, eating from a plate of pasta slowly with a morose expression. Almost instantly, Allen headed towards him and sat beside him, smiling.

"Hey."

The red head looked up, and gave Allen a warm smile.

"Hey. Medic didn't work you too hard, ne Allen?"

"No, it wasn't that difficult. Are you okay?"

At this, Lavi gave a forced smile and looked a little awkward.

"Gramps… isn't happy with me…" the red head replied, pushing the remains of his meal around his plate with his fork.

"Is he ever happy with you?" Allen questioned, raising an eyebrow. Lavi laughed.

"Yeah, I guess that's true," he replied in amusement, grinning. "Nah, I've pissed him off quite a bit this time. It's no biggie though."

"Hmm, if you say so," Allen said, shaking his head slightly.

Just then, a cook announced that Allen and Medic's food was ready, so the pair of them collected their food (Allen needed a trolley). Soon, the three of them were eating and chatting, Lavi's worries fading by the second.

When they had finished, piles and piles of plates littering the table, so much so that everyone nearby was eyeing Allen's towers of used utensils fearfully, they left the Cafeteria and headed down the now peaceful corridors.

"So, what now?" Medic asked, turning towards Lavi. "Are you and Bookman going to keep trying to unravel the poems?"

"Well we kinda need to see the originals, but they're back at the Order," Lavi explained. "Could you make us a Gate there, Allen?"

"If Link will allow it," Allen answered after a while, looking thoughtful. "We can go ask him."

"What's an Ark Gate?" Medic asked, frowning. Lavi turned to face the brunette and grinned mischeviously.

"You'll find out, hopefully."

So, heading down to the Dormitories, they eventually found their room and entered it. Lying on the bed nearest to the door was Link; the blonde was fiddling with his plaited hair with a bored, and slightly pissed, expression, brown eyes subdued-looking.

"Oh ~ ! What's this?" Lavi asked, grinning widely. "The ever-vigilant Link, slacking on the jo-"

A well-aimed kick to the nether regions sent Lavi doubled over on the floor, both Allen and Medic blinking in surprise at Link's lack of reserve.

"Hey, Allen needs those parts intact!" Medic stated, squatting and patting Lavi on the shoulder (who was whimpering quietly). "You might have killed their sex life altogether now!"

"WHAT?"

Allen turned to face Medic indignantly, a bright red flush decorating his cheeks, eyes wide. Link blinked, trying not to appear embarrassed yet starting to feel suspicious at the same time.

"What on Earth are you talking about?" the blonde demanded, narrowing his eyes at Allen's flustered countenance. He stepped forward, placing his hands on his hips as neither Allen nor Medic responded. Then -

"Ne Two Spot... you're kinda treading on my head."

Link jumped a little, looking downwards and realising that he had been standing on Lavi, who was blinking away tears of pain with a childish pout. Stepping backwards, Link sat down on the edge of the bed. Lavi got up.

"Right, now that we've made me sterile and braindead," Lavi said cheerfully, brushing himself down. "Can Allen make an Ark Gate to the Order? Me and Gramps need to see the original poems."

Link blinked. Then, after a while, he sighed and looked at the two Exorcists carefully.

"Fine. But we must visit Inspector Lvellie before we return here."

Both Allen and Lavi's faces fell, but they nodded nonetheless. At that moment, Bookman entered the room.

"We have permission to leave," the old man stated, eyeing the group with an apathetic gaze. "We should leave now."

"Understood," Allen answered, nodding. "Where are we departing?"

"There is an unused training hall on the floor below," Bookman said. "Will that suffice?"

Allen nodded.

"Hey hey, can I come with you guys?" Medic asked, grinning. Everyone turned towards her.

"I don't see why not," Lavi replied, smiling and putting an arm around Medic's shoulders.

Allen, Link and Bookman sighed and shared a look of resignation - she wouldn't leave them alone unless they let her go.

Leaving the Dormitories behind, the 5 of them headed down the corridor and went down a pair of dimly lit stairs. The corridor below was dark, but a small slant of light from a pair of double doors at the end of the hallway let them see enough to make their way there.

Pushing the heavy wooden doors open, the group found themselves in a huge hall with arched beams supporting the ceiling, 2 large pillars of stone spanning at least a third of the room.

Standing nearby was the Clan Head and Head Archiver.

"We have come to see you off," Clan Head said with a false smile, eyes glinting as his gaze met Lavi's.

"How nice," Allen murmured, tone verging on being sarcastic. Lavi simply scowled and tried not to speak his mind.

"Well get on with it, Walker," Link said, giving the white haired teen a pointed stare as the atmosphere began to become more and more awkward.

Nodding, and ignoring the curious stares of the two old men standing before him, Allen closed his eyes.

_Then the boy went to sleep_

_And one or two embers alive in the ashes_

_Flared up in the shape of your beloved face._

A circle of light appeared before Allen, making the room glow ethereally.

_Thousands of dreams spread over the land_

_Stars like silver eyes twinkling in the night_

_You shining ones fell to Earth._

The top of a large pillar started to form near to the ground. Clan Head, Head Archiver and Medic stepped closer curiously.

_Even though the eons turn many prayers to dust_

_I will keep praying_

_Please love this child_

"And kiss the hand you're holding."

Allen hadn't meant to sing the last line out loud, but it was hard not to; the song always had such a pull on him.

Suddenly, a long white pillar of light burst upwards, the number "49" glowing brightly at its side. Medic gasped and fell backwards, jaw open in shock. Both Head Archiver and Clan Head blinked, eyes wide.

"A piece of important history," Clan Head murmured, tone full of reverence.

Ignoring the others, Allen stepped forward and put his head through the Gate. It led to the Ark, so the teen headed back out and smiled at the others.

"Ready?"

Nodding, Lavi and Link walked past Allen and through the Gate without hesitation. Bookman had to drag Medic in with him.

"Gehhhhh what is this place?" Medic cried, brown eyes wide with fear.

"It's called Noah's Ark," Allen replied, closing the Gate behind Medic and Bookman. "You can use it to travel between places, and I can control it."

Medic simply gawped and said nothing.

"Which door, Allen?" Lavi asked, looking around at the nearby buildings and doorways curiously. Stepping forwards, Allen headed towards a large building down the street and opened the door without stepping through it.

"This one!"

Following the young Exorcist, the others stepped through the door and found themselves in the Black Order Headquarters, numerous Ark Gates surrounding them.

"We're home," Allen called, smiling warmly as members of the Science Department saw them walk through the Gate.

"Welcome home!"

Standing, with a happy grin, was Lenalee; a tray laden with mugs of coffee was in her arms, the steam trailing upwards. Allen and Lavi grinned back.

They were home, and Lavi knew that despite his origins and the code of the Bookmen, the Order _was_ home.

And it felt good to be back.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (japanese)

- oyasuminasai = goodnight (japanese)

- féijíchǎng = flat chested (mandarin chinese)

- gomen nasai = I'm sorry (japanese)

- lǎo tóuzi = old geezer (mandarin chinese)

- wàngbāgāozi = bastard (mandarin chinese)

- rǔ xiù wèi gān = literally means 'the smell of milk is not dry/gone yet' - refers to someone being wet behind the ears, or inexperienced (mandarin chinese)

- lǎo bù sǐde = literally means 'an old man who just won't die' (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Sorry this was kinda crap T^T I need some time to get back into writing, it seems ~**

**Chapter 11 will be out soon, please review and thanks again for the support. And remember, story header ;)**

**Much love, xrowa-chanx**


	13. Chapter 11: Where Secrets Hide

**Hey there! Sorry it's been a while, the past few days have been very busy and kinda shit ^^" But anyways, I found a really old laptop in my room with half it's screen working - but typing on an actual keyboard compared to a tablet is heaven XD**

**Anyways anyways, on to the chapter! Thank you to kh07gl, Hanashi o suru, patrick the almighty observer, Paancakes, Kimura Yumi, MidnightAbyssx02, Stavarn100, Shirubia-kurosaki77, A Lucent Silhouette, randompersonwholovesthisstory, bakaxusagi, Geeres, JamieGlasgow4, Hi Hikari No Kaze, and Sablire for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing ~ !**

**And GEEEHHHH I need hugs T^T New Pandora Hearts was pure heartbreaking awful djsjdhfftysjfif ;_;**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

And ye shall know the truth

_And the truth shall make you free._

St. John's Gospel

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 11 - Where Secrets Hide, Truths Are Found

The Black Order was just as bustling and busy as usual, with the corridors teeming with members of the Science Department and Finders moving to and fro, carrying reports and boxes. And, though it was probably just as busy and loud as Bookman Headquarters, Lavi liked this busyness. As he walked through the halls and made his way towards the Cafeteria, he couldn't help but grin at the hustle and bustle of it all; it felt like home.

Bookmen weren't supposed to have homes, nor feel like anywhere they stayed nor any persona they owned felt right for them, or felt like something they couldn't let go of if necessary. Lavi, however, liked his current persona and the place that all the other Exorcists called home.

He was straying from the Code. But he didn't mind. Not any longer, at least.

Lavi sighed as he entered the busy Cafeteria hall; he knew that Bookman was going to find out about his secrets and his change in temperament soon enough. However, as he joined the queue for food and waited, he knew that he wasn't going to change how he acted, nor try and go back to how he was before.

He could never go back now.

"Ahh Lavi! It's been a while!"

Jerry beamed with his usual happy smile, leaning forward out of his booth and patting Lavi on the head. The Exorcist grinned a little uncomfortably and pushed Jerry's hand off with a laugh.

"It has, yeah. Can I have spaghetti bolognaise?"

"Sure sure, it'll be done soon ~ !" Jerry cried, turning around and shouting a few instructions to the other cooks.

As Lavi waited for his food to be made, he noticed someone walking up to him. Turning around, he smiled when he saw Medic.

"Hey _féijíchǎng_! How's it going?" Lavi asked cheerfully, clapping a hand on the brunette's shoulder. Medic returned the smile and then sighed, looking exhausted.

"This place is so weird and huge!" she commented, rubbing her forehead irritably. "Bookman took me for a tour, and I know I'm gonna get lost!"

"Ah just stick with me or Allen and you'll be fine," Lavi said reassuringly.

Just then, a plate of steaming hot and delicious-smelling bolognaise was placed before Lavi. The red head grinned and eagerly took the plate.

"Oh man I am so hungry!"

"I need to order something, so I'll be with you in a minute!" Medic called as Lavi walked away. The teen nodded in reply before finding a table to sit at.

After a bit of searching, the red head found a table where only one person was sitting. Crying delightfully and practically skipping towards the table, Lavi dropped his plate of food and glomped Kanda with a happy, and rather oblivious, grin.

"Yuuuuuuuu ~~~ !"

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!"

Brandishing Mugen and pointing it straight at Lavi's nether regions, Kanda's eyebrow twitched in annoyance as the red headed Exorcist backed away with a fearful expression.

"Why is everyone so obsessed with castrating me all of a sudden?"

Scowling in confusion before sighing irritably and going back to eating his soba, Kanda did his best to ignore the lively Exorcist by his side and concentrate on his food.

"And then Medic accused Link of destroying my sex life and -"

"Oh there you are!"

Looking up, both Exorcists saw Medic standing before them with a bowl of ramen. Lavi grinned.

"Ne Yuu, meet Medic! She's from Bookman Headquarters"

Kanda barely looked up from his food, simply scowling at the two people before him irritably. He gave a grunt of acknowledgement, then carried on eating.

"… Not one for speaking, huh," Medic murmured, smiling somewhat nervously. Lavi nodded and laughed.

"Nah, Yuu's the quiet yet sensitive on the inside sort of per-"

"You want me to gut you?"

Lavi froze as Kanda gave him a venomous glare, one of his hands poised on Mugen's sheath. Lavi backed away and gave an awkward chuckle.

Deciding to sit down anyway, despite the Japanese Exorcist's foul mood, Lavi and Medic ate their food and talked quietly amongst themselves, Lavi quietly explaining the structure of the Black Order for Medic.

"So… the Exorcists are the only ones who fight?" Medic asked, eating some noodles thoughtfully. Lavi nodded.

"Yeah. There ain't many of us, but we manage somehow."

"But… you're seriously the only thing keeping the Earl from taking over? A bunch of teenagers, for the most part?"

Lavi fell silent at that, shrugging and eating a spoonful of spaghetti with a morose expression. Kanda snorted and stood up, holding his tray.

"What were you expecting? Heroes?" Kanda asked contemptuously, glaring at Medic as he walked past. The brunette lowered her head.

"It's not fair on you all though…" she murmured after a while, still staring down at her food. "To have to fight for your lives on a regular basis, and to have the burden of protecting so many people…"

Lavi didn't answer, finishing his plate and leaning back with a sigh. Eventually Medic looked up, meeting Lavi's eye with a subdued expression.

"Don't you get scared of losing the people important to you?"

"Of course I do."

Medic blinked at that, noticing the somewhat strained smile that Lavi was giving her.

"I've lost more friends than I can count, especially amongst the Finders," the red head said quietly, looking across the Cafeteria. "But we can't afford to spend all our time worrying about the future, and about the people we care about."

Lavi smiled then, patting Medic on the head.

"We're all pretty strong, ya know. We can deal."

Medic stared at the teen before her, eyes wide. Then, after a while, she leant forward and hugged the red head tightly.

"Then I hope you guys can win this. More for your sake than the rest of us."

"Are you quite finished?"

Looking up, both Medic and Lavi broke away and smiled awkwardly as Bookman walked up to their table and glared.

"Sorry Gramps," Lavi said, grabbing his plate and standing up. "I'm guessin' you want me upstairs."

The old man nodded, eyes narrowing.

"Can I come with you?" Medic asked, standing up also. Lavi shook his head.

"Sorry féijíchǎng, we're gonna have to talk more later," the red head answered quietly, smiling a little. "Go find Allen or something. We'll be back later."

And, with that, master and apprentice left, leaving Medic to eat the rest of her lunch alone.

The corridors were just starting to become less busy as Lavi and Bookman headed upstairs to where the poems were being kept. After they left for Bookman Headquarters, Komui had the poems moved to a separate room near his office so that they were safer.

It was certainly more convenient for Lavi, in any case.

Eventually, Bookman and Lavi reached the third floor. Heading past Komui's office, and noticing that he was actually doing his work for once, the two of them headed down to the end of the corridor and entered through a door with a simple sign saying 'Science Department only.'

"Guess we're gonna have to be members of the Science Department for a little while, huh," Lavi commented with a laugh. Bookman ignored him and pushed the door open.

The room wasn't all that big, but it was brightly lit by many lamps situated above and around the room. Lying on a single metal table in the center of the room were the two poems and the single clue that Lavi had found in India.

The room was cold, and Lavi pulled his scarf higher up his neck as the chill sent a shiver down his spine.

The two of them walked forwards and stopped just before the table. Bookman turned towards Lavi.

"It's time."

The red head nodded, gulping nervously.

Though he was far from comfortable with Bookman being so close to him while he used his eye, he knew he had pushed his luck enough with the old man and that he would refuse to be left in the dark about anything more to do with Lavi and his actions.

This was the price Lavi had to pay.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"So, how have things been while we've been away?"

Lenalee turned towards Allen with a smile, walking beside him through the main corridor.

"Things have been good. There haven't been many missions lately, and Miranda seems to be coping better now," Lenalee explained softly, holding her newly finished report to her chest. "And everyone's trying to figure out Kanda's Innocence at the moment, too."

"He's a Crystal Type now, isn't he…" Allen murmured, looking thoughtful. Lenalee nodded.

"His Innocence seems to be similar to mine. So _ge-ge_ thinks that Equipment Types can become Crystal Types if their Innocence wants to evolve."

"But not Parasite Types?"

"Maybe. We'd have to wait and see if either you or Krory became Crystal Types, or if we found another Parasite Type who evolved into one."

"Though, if becoming a Crystal Type means that your Innocence is more connected to your emotions, then maybe Parasite Types can't evolve further…"

Allen looked a little morose then, looking down at his boots as he walked forwards. Lenalee nudged his arm good-naturedly and gave the teen a comforting smile.

"You're really strong already, Allen. We're all just trying to catch up to you."

Allen smiled at that, opening a door in front of them and holding it open for Lenalee.

"Thank you, Lenal-"

"ALLEN!"

Allen fell to the floor as Timothy, out of nowhere, leapt into the white haired teen's arms and sent him crashing downwards. Lenalee giggled in amusement.

"Timothy?" Allen asked, rubbing his head with a wince. "That hurt…"

"Sorry! I've missed you though!" the boy cried, hugging Allen with a wide happy grin. Then, grinning further, Timothy let go of Allen and turned to face him eagerly.

"Does that mean Eye-Patchy is here too?"

Allen blinked a little, then gave the boy a bright and warm smile, nodding and laughing as Timothy's face brightened noticeably.

"Where is he?" the boy asked, beaming. "I need to go ask him about some history stuff! ... He is a history nerd, right?"

"Yes he is," Allen answered with amusement, trying not to laugh out loud again. "He's busy right now though, so see him later, okay?"

Lenalee titled her head at that, helping the two boys up.

"What is Lavi up to?" the Chinese Exorcist asked curiously. "I haven't seen him in quite a while."

"He needs to check up on something to do with the poems," Allen answered.

"Is that why you came back?"

"Yes."

Lenalee nodded in acknowledgement then ruffled Timothy's hair with a smile.

"We can go and see him later together, okay Timothy?"

For a while the young Exorcist stood there and pouted sulkily, folding his arms and looking at the ground with a scowl. Eventually, he sighed and looked up a little.

"Fine, we'll go see him later Pigtails."

Lenalee and Allen both smiled; the boy's childishness and innocence was lovely to see and hear after seeing so many broken children.

"So that's where you are!"

A brunette woman stomped up to the three of them and grabbed Timothy by the ear, frowning with her lips pursed into a thin line.

"WHAA- Emilia ? !"

"You were meant to have started your studies half an hour ago!" Emilia snapped beratedly, letting go of the boy before her and placing her hands on her hips in an adamant fashion. "I've been looking for you everywhere!"

"But I don't wanna study!" Timothy cried, stomping his foot. "You can't make me!"

And, with that, the young boy gave Emilia's breasts a good grab before rolling down the hall on his rollerskates, leaving the brunette woman to flush with embarrassment and run after him, yelling.

Both Allen and Lenalee laughed in amusement, though they should have taken pity on the poor woman's trouble. But, their hearts were lighter than they'd ever been, and it was good to be with friends and loved ones with nothing major going on at the same time.

"So, have you got anything that you need to do right now?" Lenalee asked, turning towards Allen with a small smile. The white haired teen shook his head.

"Do you?" he asked in return.

"No, not really. Want to go for a walk around town?"

Allen nodded with a smile.

After Lenalee dropped her report off in her brother's office, and spent quite a bit of time trying to fling her brother off of her leg, Allen and Lenalee picked up their cloaks from their dorms and headed outside of the Order building, the cold wintery temperatures making them both wrap their cloaks tightly around them.

"Are you sure you want to go for a walk?" Allen asked, noticing how bare-legged Lenalee was and how she seemed to tremble slightly as they headed into town. The raven haired teen smiled and elbowed Allen lightly.

"I'm fine, Allen. Gives me an excuse to go buy us something hot to drink, right?"

Allen laughed in reply. Soon enough, the two Exorcists found themselves entering the outskirts of Central London. After a bit more walking and a bit of searching, the pair of them found a nice little cafe on the corner of the street. Entering the establishment and ordering green tea for Lenalee and hot chocolate (with whipped cream, marshmallows and bits of chocolate) for Allen, they found a table to sit at near the window.

"It's so nice to not to have to fight so much," Lenalee said with a peaceful sigh, leaning back in her chair and holding her mug of tea in her hands to warm them up. Allen nodded in agreement.

For a while the both of them were silent, simply enjoying the warmth that their drinks were bringing them, and the calm of each other's company. Eventually, Lenalee put down her mug of tea and leant forward with a cheeky smile.

"So ~ How are things with you and Lavi?"

Allen blinked a little, jerking his mug upwards and getting a splodge of cream on his nose. Lenalee burst out laughing as the white haired Exorcist flushed with embarrassment as he wiped the white foam off of his nose.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about," he murmured indignantly, blushing deeper and avoiding eye contact as Lenalee giggled.

"Okay, fine," she said with a laugh, sitting back in her chair and sipping from her mug with a barely hidden smirk. "When you start becoming unable to walk, I'll know why."

"L-L-Lenalee ? !"

If Allen was blushing before, it was nothing compared to the blush he sported as Lenalee chuckled into her drink. The white haired teen tried to hide his embarrassment behind his mug, and failed miserably.

"Lavi's rubbing off on you, isn't he..."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Lenalee was all innocence and smiles, finishing her drink and waiting patiently for Allen to finish his; it was as if she had never made such a perverted comment in the first place.

Allen made a mental note to keep an eye on both Lenalee and Medic when it came to his relationship with Lavi. Who knows what they'd do.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Link sighed as he sat down in what had come to be 'his' bed. He had had bedrooms and beds before, and called some places home. But, for some reason, Link felt comfortable in Allen's room.

Leaning back onto the bed and staring up at the ceiling, the blonde CROW found himself thinking back on the past few days and everything new that had happened. Quite a lot had occurred, from starting to have his suspicions about the true nature of Lavi and Allen's relationship, to Lavi's past and what he went through as a child.

Link didn't feel sympathy. It did him no good to feel sorry for other people. He knew that he should inform Lvellie about Lavi and Allen, and maybe just Lavi in general. The red headed Bookman did not have a good track record with his mental state, and having someone so unstable would never do the Order any good if Lavi cracked in battle.

However, the other Exorcists weren't that much better than Lavi. Allen most certainly was hiding something under his gentlemanly facade, Lenalee was officially bed-ridden and mentally unstable for a year or two of her childhood, Kanda was... well, Kanda, Krory fell in love with an Akuma, Miranda had severe issues with self-confidence, Timothy was a pervert at age 9, and let's not get started on the Generals.

Link grimaced and rolled onto one side, sighing irritably. To be honest, all of the Exorcists were unstable in one way or another. So reporting Lavi for potential instability would be pointless. He had a good record in battle so far.

However, the nature of Lavi's relationship with Allen was a concern, despite Link's misgivings about it all.

The blonde still could not believe that he reported nothing when on the phone to Central. He should have said something, and he had spent a good deal of time before Lavi, Allen and Medic went into his room earlier on in the day contemplating his thoughts on his actions.

Despite his duty as a member of the Catholic Church, and a loyal member of Central Administration, Link felt a pang of guilt everytime he considered reporting the two of them for heresy against the Church.

There was an innocence, no matter how perverted Link knew Lavi was, about the two of them and how they acted around each other; something pure that made Link feel bad about wanting to destroy it.

Nevertheless, the blonde knew that he couldn't shove his duty away for long.

Suddenly, a tap on the door.

"Come in," Link called, sitting up and composing himself a little. The door opened to reveal Medic, who was smiling shyly and looking a little awkward as she stood in the doorway to the bedroom.

"Sorry for interrupting," she said with a nervous laugh. "But I got lost, and someone directed me here to find you."

Link's eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

"And why do you need me?"

"Everyone else is busy, and I'm bored."

The somewhat childish reply from Medic made Link sigh in annoyance.

"You shouldn't have come along then - we all have our duties here, and we are busy and do not need you bothering us."

"... How is lying on a bed being busy?"

Link scowled.

"What do you want?" he snapped, standing up to face the woman before him.

"Some company, if that's too much to ask!" Medic replied angrily back, glaring at the blonde CROW with narrowed eyes.

"Go upstairs to the infirmary and have a talk with Matron then!" Link stated, pushing Medic out of the door. "It's on the bottom floor near the Cafeteria. I'm sure you'll find it."

And, with that, the blonde shoved Medic out of the room and closed the door behind her before she could protest. Going back to his bed, and feeling a little guilty for being so blunt with the woman, Link groaned and buried his head in his pillow.

He was starting to get a rather painful headache. And he knew it would not leave him be until he came to a decision.

But how would he decide what to do? He felt conflicted to the point where he couldn't figure out what the right thing to do was.

After a good deal of time in which he carried on thinking, and making his headache worse, Link eventually came to a decision of some sort.

He would confront Lavi about it. That way, he would be able to fully make his decision based off of the red head's reactions.

Some things had to be done.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The silence was deafening.

It was practically tangible, so thick that Lavi thought he could grab it as if it was a physical thing. Bookman stood close by with narrowed eyes, watching his apprentice with a hawk's concentration. The red head tried to ignore his master, simply staring at the pieces of paper before him and trying to calm his rapidly beating heart.

In a way, Lavi wished he had not made this choice. He and Bookman would have figured out the poems' meanings eventually but, for some reason, Lavi felt as if they were running out of time. The evolution of Lenalee and Kanda's Innocence, the arrival of a modified Level Three Akuma that could hide in human beings' skin, the increase in battles, the increase in deaths...

The Order was running out of time.

Taking a deep breath in, and letting it out slowly, Lavi raised a hand to his eyepatch and pulled it down.

"Heterochromia..." Bookman murmured quietly, looking at Lavi's blue right eye with a curiosity that he simply could not hide. Lavi ignored him.

Keeping his hands poised above the three pieces of paper, Lavi internally debated over which one he should look at first and, eventually, he decided to touch the first poem that they had found.

Heart beating fast in his chest, Lavi lowered his hands and touched the piece of aged paper with the tips of his fingers. Again, like when he tried to go through Motoki's memories, the uptake was slow at first. Images of Komui moving the poem from the library; Bookman leaning forward over it with a frown; darkness when the poem was kept in Bookman's coat pocket as they left the church; Lavi picking the poem up.

Then Lavi started seeing memories that he didn't recognise.

The images came to him faster as he saw a middle-aged man place the poem down on the church's altar in Saint-Vincent-de-Paul. The man had short curly hair, and large circular glasses; something about him seemed quite sinister and, when it seemed as if the man was looking directly at Lavi, a shudder went down his spine.

Lavi then saw more memories, of travelling by train and walking through busy bustling towns in France. In all of the memories, Lavi could not hear any form of sound whatsoever; the sound of his own hurried breathing and of Bookman's unnerved him.

Suddenly, a sharp pain above Lavi's right eye made him stagger backwards and clutch his forehead tightly. The red head felt a hand on his back, stopping him from falling to the ground.

"What did you see?" Bookman asked, observing and making a mental note of the pain evident on Lavi's face. His apprentice sighed and took a few deep breaths.

"I saw us finding the poem, and some old guy carrying the poem through France, but I didn't see anymore after that. Gimme a minute..."

With that, both master and apprentice fell silent. After a while, when Lavi's eye hurt less and his breathing was almost back to normal, the red head stood up again and touched the piece of paper.

Because he had already sifted through the most recent memories connected to the poem, Lavi could filter through the initial memories very quickly and, soon enough, the red head began to see unknown memories and images in his mind's eye.

The man who had placed the poem in the church had travelled a very long way; Lavi recognised landmarks from across most of the northern hemisphere; Germany, Italy, Switzerland, Poland, Russia, China, and Japan. Lavi also saw the cathedral at Bath.

Then, suddenly, a very clear memory came to mind.

The man was in a dark room, lit by a solitary candle situated on a small wooden desk. The man was sitting at said desk, hunched over something. Eventually, a piece of paper came into view; it had lots of numbers on it, and what looked like addition and multiplication sums.

Wincing as his eye started to throb painfully again, Lavi looked at the piece of paper and commited it to memory before moving his hands away and closing his right eye.

"Are you finished?"

Lavi turned towards his master and nodded, lifting his eyepatch up and covering his eye once more.

It took a while for Lavi to filter through the last memory. But, when he did, his visible eye widened as it all pieced itself together.

"I think I've got it..." Lavi murmured, looking back at the first poem.

"And? What is its meaning?" Bookman asked, leaning forward, eyeing both his apprentice and the poem with narrowed eyes.

"I can't believe we didn't notice it before..." Lavi said, picking the piece of paper up. "You add up the numbers that make up each word, then each sentence up, and then multiply the total by 5."

"Why 5?" Bookman questioned. Lavi shrugged.

"I saw it in the collection of memories. I don't know why you need to."

Taking out a scrap piece of parchment from his pocket and a pen, Lavi leant against the table and completed one of the sums that he had seen.

_(23 + 8 + 5 + 14) + (20 + 8 + 5) + (13 + 21 + 19 + 9 + 3) + (15 + 6) + (20 + 8 + 5) = 316 x 5 = 1580_

"What does the number 1580 mean to you, Gramps?" Lavi asked, holding the parchment up.

For a while Bookman was silent. Then, his eyes widened.

"The year St. Vincent de Paul was born!" the old man explained, mind whirring. Lavi grinned.

"Now, what do you bet the next numbers will be connected to where we went after France?"

Quickly calculating the rest of the poem, Lavi obtained 8 years in total, including the first year he found: _1580, 1020, 1405, 1130, 1185, 1510, 655, 1555_.

"So, 1580 was the year St. Vincent de Paul was born. 1020 was when the Kandariya Mahadeva Temple was completed, and 1405 was when Bath Abbey was completed too, right?" Lavi explained, tone of voice eager. "Therefore -"

"The other numbers will correspond to other locations important in history," Bookman added, eyes glinting. "Good work, brat."

Lavi grinned happily.

"Come. We shall use the library at Bookman Headquarters to figure out the other 5 locations from the po-."

CRASH!

Both of them were sent tumbling to the floor.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

It was getting dark by the time Allen and Lenalee returned from their walk into town. The Order's corridors weren't that busy, and the two of them could walk at a comfortable pace through the hallways without having to rush.

"I wonder..." Allen murmured after a while, looking contemplative as he walked. Lenalee tilted her head curiosly.

"What is is, Allen?"

"I haven't seen Master in ages."

The white haired teen looked a little solemn as he said this, so Lenalee rubbed the boy's arm comfortingly.

"I'm sure he'll turn up at some point," she said with a smile. "No need to worry."

"I'm just worried he's going to surprise me with something," Allen muttered fearfully, looking scared instead of worried. Lenalee sighed; she had yet to accept that Allen's relationship with Cross was quite as screwed up as it appeared to be.

Suddenly, as the two of them came near to the Dormitories, they saw Kanda run towards them.

"K-Kanda... ?" Lenalee stammered, stopping in her tracks. Allen stopped also.

"Start fucking running!" was all the raven haired teen shouted before he sped past them. Both Lenalee and Allen blinked.

Then they saw it.

It was the largest, most scariest Komlin that either of them had ever seen. Allen shrunk back in fear.

Turning around and running behind Kanda, Allen fled from the insane robot that was crashing down the hallway.

Lenalee, however, stayed put and, taking a deep breath, activated her Innocence.

"Innocence, activate!"

The bracelets at her ankles melted and crept up her legs, slowly making ruby coloured boots that went up as high as Lenalee's mid thigh. When her Innocence was fully activated, Lenalee jumped upwards and slammed her foot down on the robot's head.

No response.

She tried again, harder this time. No response.

"What the - ? !"

Swatting the girl away with a metal hand, the robot carried on down the hallway with a single statement running through it's mind.

_Kill Kanda Yuu._

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

Back in Komui's office, the Chief of the Black Order sat with something grasped in his hands, crying loudly and making obnoxious noises. Reever sprinted into the room, skidded on all the paper, slid into a bookshelf, got buried under many hundreds of books, and got up a few seconds later covered in bruises.

"What the hell is going on, Chief ? !" the blonde snapped, wincing as he walked up to Komui's desk. Komui didn't look up.

"Chief!"

"..."

"C'mon, answer me!"

"..."

"Chief, I'm warn- Are those panties?"

Grasped in Komui's right hand were a pair of women's panties, black with lace around the outside. Reever now looked severly disturbed.

"Ch-ch-ch-chief? Who the fuck are those?"

"My sweet Lenalee has been tainted..."

Komui sounded heartbroken, sniffing as more tears slid down. Reever had the sudden urge to punch the man before him and shove the panties where the sun didn't shine.

"You're kidding me, right? You set a Komlin loose because of Lenalee's underwear?"

"KANDA DEFILED THEM!"

"... What?"

Komui was standing up now, looking furiously angry.

"That bastard will pay for doing such a thing to my precious Lenalee's belongings!"

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"I swear I'm gonna kill him for this."

Lavi headed through the ruined corridors with a livid expression, one quite uncommon for the red head. Bookman also looked just as angry, and seemed prepared to strangle anyone who dared try and piss him off further.

The carnage left behind by the Komlin robot was almost as bad as when the Level Four attacked the previous Order building some months prior. The hallways had giant cracks through them, debris was scattered all over the floor, and people were picking themselves up from the floor with groans and pained noises.

"Lavi! Bookman!"

Running up to them, glasses askew, Johnny stopped just before the two Bookman Clan members and panted.

"Johnny, what's going on? Has Komui lost it this time?" Lavi asked, fingering his Innocence with a scowl; he itched to destroy something. Johnny sighed.

"It's a long story..."

_A little while earlier..._

_The hallways were quiet as Kanda headed down towards his bedroom, his hair swishing by his waist as he walked. Suddenly, the sound of someone stomping angrily caught the Japanese Exorcist's attention._

"_Stupid Chief not letting me take time off!"_

_Johnny was heading in the opposite direction to Kanda, fists clenched by his sides as he walked angrily towards the raven haired teen. "How will I take Miss Lou Fa out for a date now?"_

_Kanda simply blinked and ignored the curly haired scientist, wondering how on Earth the bumbling man had ended up with a date with someone from the Asia Branch._

_Then, just as Johnny passed Kanda, the sound of someone else stomping down the corridor made the both of them stop._

"_Stupid blonde haired bastard, shoving me out the door! I should have turned around, kicked the door open, and punched him so hard in the balls that he would never be able to get it up again!"_

_Medic kept muttering to herself, oblivious to her surroudings. With a thunk she walked straight into Kanda, who gave her a venemous glare as she fell backwards to the ground._

"_Ahh! _Gomen nasai_, Yuu-san," Medic said quickly, standing up and giving the teen an apologetic smile. The teen scowled more._

"_Don't call me that."_

"_Call you what?"_

"_Kanda doesn't like being called Yuu, Miss... uhh..."_

"_Medi-"_

_SQUEAK!_

_Jumping a little, Kanda, Johnny and Medic looked downwards. Lying on the floor, with what could only be called an expression of annoyance, was a small black hamster. Medic cried out._

"_My beloved! How did you get here! You must have gone for a nap in my pocket..."_

_Bending downwards, Kanda picked up the small rodent with a disgusted expression. Suddenly, the hamster bit the Japanese Exorcist hard on the hand and flew to the floor._

_With a speed that stunned the three of them, the hamster scampered off._

"_NOOOOO!"_

_Instantly running after it, Medic shoved Kanda to the side and pelted it down the hallway. Furious, Kanda followed, fingering Mugen with narrowed eyes. Johnny, feeling worried about what the teen was going to do to Medic, also followed._

_After a few minutes, Kanda and Johnny noticed that the brunette woman had stopped._

"_I've lost him!" she cried, looking as if she was going to burst into tears. Johnny patted her shoulder comfortingly._

"_Don't worry, Miss! We'll find him!"_

"_Che, he's right there."_

_Heading after it, Kanda pushed the other two aside and ran after the hamster as it managed to get through a crack in a nearby door. Kanda opened said door and went inside._

_The door locked behind him._

"_What the - ? !"_

_Kanda was in someone's bedroom; a girl's, from the looks of things. There were clothes littering the floor, and in particular a pair of black lacy panties that the hamster was now crawling into._

"_I hate you."_

_Grimacing, Kanda picked the panties up and grabbed the hamster, squeezing it slightly and smirking in satisfaction as it squeaked in fear._

_Then it all went to s-._

"_TARGET ACQUIRED!"_

_Turning around, Kanda noticed a bright light focused on him. It was a huge Komlin, that had managed to appear from a hole in the ceiling. Kanda growled._

"_Damn Komui..."_

_Before the teen could react, the robot snatched the panties from Kanda's hand and tried to squish him with a huge metal palm. Kanda backflipped using one-hand, and kicked the bedroom door down with a shout._

_Medic and Johnny were still outside and, without a word, Kanda literally threw the squirming hamster in his hand at Medic's face and activated his Innocence._

_Leaping forwards, Kanda tried to cut off the Komlin's head. But, for some reason, Mugen could not pass through the robot's metal armour. Kanda winced as shockwaves were sent up his arm as his sword bounced off of the Komlin and sent him flying._

_There was now only one option._

"_RUN!"_

"So you see, the Chief has somehow invented an anti-Innocence armour, so the only thing we could do was run."

Both Lavi and Bookman were speechless.

"... Komui thinks..."

"... Kanda was going through..."

"... Lenalee's underwear?"

Silence. Then -

"PAHAHAHAHA!"

Lavi fell to the ground, pissing himself laughing with tears of mirth sliding down his cheeks. Bookman tried his best not to smirk, whilst Johnny just blinked tiredly.

Eventually, the red head stood up and wiped the tears away with a hand, looking deeply amused.

"Alright then, let's go find the Panty Snatcher and find a way to destroy this robot!"

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

"Why isn't it working?"

Allen slumped behind a bit of debris, looking traumatised. Kanda simply scowled, eyebrow twitching in annoyance. Lenalee sat beside Allen, panting.

"_Ge-ge_ must have given the robot protection against anti-Akuma weapons," Lenalee murmured with a sigh. "I always worried he'd do this eventually..."

"So... how do we destroy it?" Allen asked, risking a look over the debris and dropping the floor quickly as a huge rock skimmed the top of his head.

"We can't," Kanda deadpanned, brushing some dust off of Mugen. Allen turned towards him with an indignant expression.

"It must have a weak spot, idiot!"

"You're the idiot! We can't use Innocence against it!"

"I know that!"

"Then use that tiny _moyashi_ brain of your's to find a way to fight it."

"I'm not a beansprout, you bastard!"

"Asshole!"

"Dickhead!"

"..._Uke_."

"YOU WORTHLESS -"

"Stop fighting right now!"

Kanda and Allen flinched as Lenalee cracked her knuckles and glared at the two of them with a livid expression.

"We'll find a way to fight it; we just need to find its weakness," Lenalee explained, quickly glancing over the debris before ducking down again.

Just then, a large snake made of flames sent large chunks of rock hurtling down on the Komlin, a loud screeching noise making Allen, Lenalee and Kanda wince.

"Yo ~ !"

Standing a few feet away was Lavi, his Innocence glowing slightly. Allen and Lenalee smiled. Just then, a small rock hit Lavi round the back of the head.

"Are you going to help me brat ? !"

Lavi turned around, giving Bookman an apologetic smile.

"Just comin', _lǎo toúzi_."

The red head sauntered over to where Bookman was standing; the old man had activated his Innocence, and was trying to find an opening into the robot's head so that he could deactivate it.

Lavi frowned and knelt down next to the struggling Komlin, looking around the joints where its head was connected to the rest of its body. For quite a while the red head said nothing, simply observing the robot.

"Are you going to destroy it?" Allen asked impatiently, creeping from behind the debris he had been hiding behind carefully. Lavi looked over at him and stuck his tongue out immaturely.

"Be patient, stupid beansprout!"

"THE NAME'S ALLEN!"

"Do I have to stop the two of you fighting as well ? !"

As Lenalee said this, with a menacing tone to her voice, both Lavi and Allen laughed nervously and shook their heads. Kanda sighed in annoyance and ignored everyone else.

"This should do it."

Everyone turned to look as Bookman used his metal claws to peel a bit of the armour back; since they weren't made of Innocence, he could use it against the Komlin model. Then, pulling out a scroll and sending a barrage of needles into the gap he created, Bookman grunted in satisfaction as the robot gave a horrendous screech, spasmed a few times, then collapsed into a few dozen pieces.

A faint anguished cry could be heard echoing from the floors above.

"Well, just another normal day at the Order," Lavi said with a grin, holstering his Innocence and sitting down on a bit of debris. Everyone else deactivated their anti-Akuma weapons also, and relaxed.

"Wouldn't be home without Komui trying to kill us all," Allen added with a huff, eyeing the deactivated robot with narrowed eyes. The others laughed.

"Speaking of my brother..."

With that parting remark, and leaving her weapon activated, Lenalee made her way through the rubble towards her brother's office. Lavi and Allen gulped.

"Poor Komui... and all over Lenalee's underwear too..." Lavi murmured, looking slightly sympathetic as he leant back against some pieces of rock and sighed. Allen blinked then flushed bright red.

"WHAT ? !"

"Oh? You didn't know? Mr. Yuu Panty Snatcher over there got caught holding Lenalee's pantie-"

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

And thus, it truly was another normal day at the Order. For a day where Kanda doesn't try to kill Lavi and shove his sword through his throat would be a miracle indeed.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- féijíchǎng = flat chested (mandarin chinese)

- ge-ge = older brother (mandarin chinese)

- gomen nasai = sorry (japanese)

- moyashi = beansprout (japanese)

- uke = ... this really doesn't need translating XDXD

- lǎo toúzi = old geezer (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**So that's chapter 11 - hope you liked it, and things are really gonna start developing plot wise from now on. Please review! Your feedback gives me the motivation to keep going ~**

**Look forward to the next chapter!**

**xrowa-chanx**


	14. Chapter 12: Let The Flames Begin

**This is the fastest update that I have ever done XD**

**I actually wrote most of this the night I updated because... well, insomnia sucks and I really really wanted to write this chapter and get it out as soon as possible. I will update Homeostasis after this, and CheckMate when I've done more research on how most of the warriors even fight (yeah I fail =_=) but... yeah... Sorry I'm making no sense XD**

**Anyways, thank you to Hanashi o suru, Kimura Yumi, Patrick the almighty observer for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing! You guys are awesome *heart***

**Oh, and yes - this title is a Paramore track. And yes, I was listening to it on repeat for most of this XD And I've always called the robot Komlin - it's what I've seen in the subs for the anime, and what I swear I've seen in the manga too... Ah well, if I'm wrong I was close enough XD**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Nought's had, all's spent_

_Where our desire is got without content:_

'_Tis safer to be that which we destroy,_

_Than by destruction dwell in doubtful joy._

William Shakespeare; Macbeth, Act III Scene II

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 12 - Let The Flames Begin

It didn't take long, surprisingly, for the Order to be cleaned up after its destruction by the Komlin. But, considering how often the Order had to deal with spontaneous attacks from giant robots by their Chief, it made sense.

Everyone was glad that Lvellie was away on business, anyway.

Soon enough, after helping the Finders and Science Department out with cleaning up, the Exorcists soon found themselves eating in the Cafeteria and talking about what everyone was doing next.

"Well," Lavi managed to mumble through a mouthful of yakaniku. "Me and Gramps need to go back to Bookman HQ to find out about what we got from the poem. We're really close now."

"I'm guessing I'm going with you then," Allen said with a smile, pushing aside what could have been his 50th bowl and moving on to the next one. Lavi fought back the urge to bash his head on the table before him.

"I've got a new mission with Miss Miranda and Timothy," Krory murmured, leaning back and patting his full stomach with a happy smile. "I think we are going to Italy."

"I don't wanna go on the mission," Timothy said with a sulky pout. "I wanted Eye-Patchy to teach me some history stuff.

"Hey hey, I will when I get back kiddo!" the red headed Bookman replied with a grin, putting an arm around the boy's shoulders. "I'm just very busy at the moment, ya know."

"We all are..." Miranda added quietly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear with a small smile. Everyone returned the smile (except Kanda, of course); Miranda was slowly coming out of her shell after Marie's death, but it was taking her a while.

"I'm staying put for a bit, I think..." Chaoji said, sighing. He lifted up his bandaged arms and glared at them, wishing he'd been more careful on his last mission.

"It'll be alright, Chaoji," Allen called out from the other end of the table, giving the Chinese man a reassuring smile. The man did not return it, eyes hardened as he completely ignored the white haired teen and went back to eating; Chaoji still hadn't forgiven Allen for trying to rescue Tyki back on the Ark.

"Me and Kanda are out on a mission soon, I think," Lenalee eventually said, breaking what was becoming an awkward silence. "But brother hasn't told us where we're going yet."

"Is it safe to let Panty Snatcher Yuu be anywhere near Komui after what he d-"

Lavi got no further as Kanda slammed his empty tray straight into the red head's face. Though concerned for Lavi's safety, everyone was kind of expecting such a reaction from Kanda.

Just then, the sound of three sets of footsteps approaching the table made everyone look up; it was Link, Bookman, and Medic. All three of them looked ready to leave.

"Can't we finish our meals, stupid panda?" Lavi groaned, eyeing his half-eaten plate with a hungry expression. Allen also seemed displeased about leaving his food behind.

"Don't you know the timezones, brat!" Bookman snapped, whacking his red headed apprentice round the back of the head with a hand. "It's soon becoming morning over there right now, and we don't have a lot of time to waste."

"Fine fine, no need to hit me. Jeez..." Lavi grumbled, standing up and adding his unfinished plate to Allen's.

"Bye you two!" Lenalee called as they walked away, following behind Link, Medic and Bookman. "Be home soon!"

"We will!" Allen called, smiling warmly. Lavi smiled also, giving everyone a wave as they left the Cafeteria and passed into the hallway beyond.

"Is the Ark Gate still open from before, Walker?" Link asked, adjusting his suit with a hand as they walked. Allen shook his head.

"I was worried about people from Headquarters following us through the Ark to the Order, so I closed the gate behind us," Allen replied, giving Bookman and Medic a sheepish grin as they gave him somewhat irritated glares. Lavi tried his best not to laugh.

The five of them eventually reached the giant hallway where people used the Gates to move to and from the Order building. Finding an empty spot, Allen closed his eyes and sang the Musician's Lullaby in his head. Soon enough, a huge white gate appeared before them.

"Be back soon, all of you!"

Looking over, everyone noticed Reever standing nearby, waiting for a group of Finders to finish exiting through their Gate. The blonde man smiled at them, waving. Lavi and Allen returned the gesture.

"We will, Reever!" Lavi called. "Keep Komui from killing everyone again will ya?"

"Stupid question, Lavi!" the Section Chief replied with a scowl, hoping Komui wouldn't start anything more.

Stepping through the Gate, with Medic actually stepping through and not having to be pulled through by Link, Allen soon found the door that led to Bookman Headquarters and opened it. They were in the same hall as before, with the light from the Gate being the only illumination within the dark cavernous hall.

No-one was there to greet them, luckily, so the group could walk through the corridors without unwanted company. When they went up the stairs to reach Dormitory level, Medic sighed.

"I have to go back to the infirmary; they've probably been needing me whilst I've been gone," the brunette said with an awkward laugh. "Catch you guys later!"

Soon enough, it was only the four of them left.

"Well, me and Gramps are gonna go upstairs to do some more research," Lavi said, scratching under his bandana with a finger. "What are you two gonna do?"

"I might sleep, actually," Allen answered with a laugh. "Fighting that robot was tiring."

"I will occupy myself," was all Link said in reply.

With a nod, Lavi left with Bookman for the Library above them, leaving Allen and Link to go into the room they were sharing whilst staying at Bookman Headquarters to do as they wished.

The Library was quite as master and apprentice reached the room, little to no people occupying the tables that were situated between bookshelves. Finding a discrete place to sit, the two of them gathered many dozens of books about history through the ages, calling upon the ancient knowledge of the Clan as well as their own extensive knowledge on world history through the past few centuries.

"The only problem that we have is figuring out which place is correct," Bookman murmured, flicking through a tome on Medieval history throughout Europe with deft fingers. Lavi nodded in agreement.

"If we get the most important dates and send them to Komui, he could always send Finders and maybe some other Exorcists to each location. We'd find the right one eventually."

"But that is very time consuming. What if the Noah have already caught onto what we've found, and could be finding the poems before us?"

Lavi fell silent at that. Then the red head shrugged.

"Not much we can do about that though," he answered, picking up a book from the pile next to him on Japanese history. "We ain't got a lot of options."

Bookman agreed with his apprentice, but he still felt unsure about what to do with this new knowledge that they had gained. They were going to use it, no doubt about that. But _how_ they used it was what Bookman was contemplating.

"Ne, Gramps," Lavi exclaimed, poking the old man's side. "The first three numbers go in order of when we found the poems and that clue, right?"

"Yes," Bookman replied slowly, eyes narrowing. "What are you getting at?"

"How about we just research the fourth line, which is the next one on the poem," Lavi answered, grinning. "That way we're not gonna burden Komui with too much, and we can go and help search too. Maybe the next poem or clue will lead us to the others."

For a while Bookman was silent. Then, lighting his pipe and leaning back with a sigh, the old man nodded.

"Okay fine, brat. The year's 1130, correct?"

"Yep."

"Here's some revision for you, and a test to see if you retain any of what I teach you; give me the historical headlines from that year."

"The 164th pope comes into rule; Magnus the Strong is deposed as the king of Gothenland, when Sverker the Elder proclaims himself king of Sweden," Lavi stated, counting off of his fingers. "An antipope schism occurs when Roger II of Sicily supports Anacletus II as pope instead of Innocent II; Magnus the Blind is tortured and eventually killed in Bergen, Norway when himself and Harald Gille become the kings of Norway, which starts the civil war era there; Antipope Anacletus crowns Roger II of Sicily king... Uhh..."

"And don't forget the births and dates in that year too," Bookman added, though relieved that his student hadn't forgotten important historical happenings whilst they'd been with the Order. The red head nodded, then frowned in concentration.

"... The most important ones would have been the births of Eustace IV of Boulogne, Baldwin III of Jerusalem, and Zhu Xi; and the deaths of Pope Honorius II, King Sigurd I of Norway, and Princess Teresa of Leon."

"That makes 11 locations in total, in about just as many countries, if not more."

Lavi fell silent.

"This won't be easy," Bookman muttered, taking a drag from his pipe and blowing the smoke out slowly. "Did you see anything else from the poem that could give us some clues?"

"Nah, not really..." Lavi replied, leaning back in his chair and putting down the book on Japanese history in his hands on the table. "I don't recognise the guy who wrote the poems, and he pretty much travelled around most of the northern hemisphere from what I saw."

"So the next poems and clues could be anywhere..." Bookman added, looking thoughtful.

"But that's another thing, isn't it. Do the years that we found all correlate to new poems? Maybe they're a collection of clues and poems, or there's only one poem left with loads of clues to get to it."

"That's very true..."

"So this could be one hell of a wild goose chase, or something that we should start investigatin' real soon."

Both Lavi and Bookman stopped speaking for a while, lost in their own thoughts. They did some more research on each of the 11 important historical happenings from 1130, then decided that they should take a break, despite it being early morning in Bookman HQ.

They had basically fought Komlin on their own. That was a good enough excuse to take it easy for a while.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The room was quiet as Allen slept, his face peaceful as he rested. Link was not asleep, however, and had been thinking for a good few hours about exactly what he'd say to Lavi when he confronted him about Allen.

He couldn't go in, all guns blazing. He had no clear absolute proof that the two of them were in a non-platonic relationship. But, the signs all pointed towards it. When one looked closely enough, you could tell that the two of them were more than friends.

The Vatican would label them as heretics.

Link had heard of other instances in which even heterosexual relationships were frowned upon by the Church, with some rather horrifying consequences. Link knew that Allen would suffer awfully - having already garnered a bad name for himself by having a cursed eye, and for having sympathetic feelings towards the Akuma.

And then being the host for the 14th Noah would not help the matter either.

Lavi, however, being a regular Exorcist as well as a part of the Bookman Clan, would be given no second chances. Allen needed to be kept alive, for the Order needed him and could use him as bargaining material against the Earl, if it came to it. Plus, the Order still thought that Allen might be the Heart.

Innocence doesn't just become part of your own heart to keep you alive.

No, Link believed that Allen was a very crucial part of the war. Lavi, however, was not. And the Vatican would know this. If the Bookman Clan stepped in and argued Lavi's case, he might survive and simply be excommunicated from the Church.

But his Clan would not do that. They would probably relish the teen's execution.

And execution it would be; heretics were not simply locked up and left to learn from their mistakes. The Vatican was heartless, and Lavi would be executed and his Innocence used and passed on to another accommodator.

Either that, or the teen would go through a series of torture sessions that would break him beyond the point of recognising who he was to start with.

Link buried his head in his hands. If he confronted Lavi, and discovered that he and Allen were in a relationship, Link would _have_ to reveal it to his superiors. And, undoubtedly, he would be handing Lavi a death sentence, or a sentence worse than death.

Now, Link was not one for getting emotionally connected to people. Sure, there were people from his past that meant something to him. But he was a loyal member of Central Administration. He was meant to be analytical and evaluative and out of touch with his emotions.

He was meant to do his duty until the day he died.

So why did Link feel as if he would regret informing the Order about Lavi and Allen, if it was true that they were together?

Moving his hands downwards into his lap, and looking to the side with subdued brown eyes, Link observed the small smile that had crept onto Allen's face as the teen slept. Link had spent a good deal of time with the boy now, and had come to see the many sides of Allen Walker.

Allen had had a rough past. Link knew that without even asking. Plus, Cross' behaviour spoke for itself. But Link was good at seeing beyond people's masks, and he could see the bitterness hidden behind Allen's gentle and gentlemanly countenance.

The boy resented the world, despite wanting to save it so badly.

Link also knew that the boy was scared of who he really was, and why exactly Mana decided to take care of him all those years ago. Did Mana want to care for him out of sympathy? Or was it because he was the host for the 14th Noah; his brother?

Link didn't know anymore than Allen did. And, by the sounds of it, the teen used Mana's memory as his motivation to keep going. And, by having this inner turmoil about what he meant to Mana, Allen was losing his will to keep going.

Everyone else relied on Allen too, though; Lenalee, Lavi, even Kanda - the other Exorcists saw Allen as some sort of motivation, one way or another.

Be it for Lenalee, where Allen was her rock and shoulder to cry on when thing's got tough; the person to keep her going when all she wanted was to stop.

Be it for Lavi, where Allen represented the hope in the human race that he had lost long ago; the light that made him believe there was a future worth fighting for.

Be it for Kanda, where Allen represented all that he hated; the naiveté, and innocence, that the boy held reminded Kanda of all that he had lost. But, all the same, Allen made him want to keep fighting, if not just to fuel their constant rivalry.

Link knew all this. He knew that Allen was important to his comrades, and that he probably meant more to Lavi than Link thought at first sight. If Link informed the higher-ups of the Order, the two of them would never see each other again. They wouldn't even be able to be friends, nevermind more than that.

Could Link destroy the lives of two people, completely and utterly?

Just then, the door to the room opened. Link jumped a little, startled. It was Medic, looking slightly annoyed (well, Link _had_ slammed a door in her face), but also a bit concerned.

"What is it?" Link asked quietly, aware that Allen was still asleep. Medic sighed and sat down on the edge of his bed, despite the scowl he gave her.

"Bookman's going to erase 'Lavi'..."

Link's eyes widened, his expression shocked.

"Wh-what do you mean, erase?" the blonde asked, eyes narrowing. "Do you mean that he plans to kill his apprentice?"

"Of course not!" Medic snapped, trying to stay quiet. "He's going to erase Lavi's current persona. I think he plans for the two of them to leave the Order..."

Link had nothing to say to that.

"How do you know this?" he asked after a while, tilting his head. Medic looked a little guilty.

"I've been a bit worried about _baka usagi-chan_ ever since he came back. I know his current persona's quite lively, but... I think Bookman knows."

As she said this, Medic glanced at Allen; Link noticed this, and frowned a little.

"Knows about what?"

"That Lavi wants to stay as 'Lavi'."

Medic looked worried now, wringing her hands together.

"I was talking to Librarian just now; we usually have chats in the mornings sometimes, because in our lines of work we don't have a lot to do," Medic explained, looking to the side. "She mentioned to me that the other night Bookman went to the Library very late and read the text we own on erasing personalities. Erasing personalities that someone has had for over a year takes a different technique to the one used to erase short term ones."

"And, if he erases 'Lavi'... will they cease to be Exorcists?" Link asked, voice quiet. Medic shrugged.

"I don't know. The whole point of a persona is to appear as normal as possible to everyone else. So I doubt Bookman will stay with Lavi acting like himself..."

The both of them fell silent. After a little while, Medic stood up and gave Link a very cold look, surprising the blonde.

"I know you've realised, CROW. Do me a favour and leave it be. Lavi doesn't have much time left, and he deserves some love for once after all this shit."

And, with that, the brunette left the room, leaving Link wide-eyed and sitting in utter silence.

Neither of them had noticed that Allen was no longer asleep.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The corridors began to become more and more busy as the sun rose outside. Lavi and Bookman had spent the entire morning in the Library, diligently researching and working out what to do about what they had discovered.

Not wanting to waste anymore time, the two of them decided to stop around lunchtime and head down to the Cafeteria.

"So we're gonna go back to the Order tomorrow?"

The both of them were now seated at a table in the corner of the Cafeteria hall, plates of food before them. Bookman nodded in answer to Lavi's question.

"I still need to meet with the Council again and gain permission to keep recording the events at the Order," Bookman explained, taking his chopsticks into his right hand and picking up a dumpling from his bowl. "I won't be able to do the sign-off until this evening, so we cannot return to the Black Order until that is over with."

"Okay, got it," Lavi answered, nodding.

Just then, Allen and Link walked into the Cafeteria. Allen smiled at him as he sat down, but Lavi saw the worry in his eyes and the falseness of his smile from a mile-off. Not wanting to alert the other two that something was up, Lavi returned the smile.

"Sleep well, 'sprout?" he asked, grinning cheekily. Allen pouted and hit Lavi atop the head with his elbow before he sat down.

"The name's Allen, you idiot," he muttered, glaring. Lavi winced and pouted a little.

"And a good morning to you too..."

Link and Bookman both rolled their eyes.

"So, what is the plan now Bookman?" Link asked, sitting down beside the old man and resting his head in the palm of one hand.

"We have to stay for one more day, and then we can return to the Order for good," Bookman replied, continuing to eat his lunch carefully and with relish. "We have discovered that the numerical code of the first poem represents years in history, and we know of a few locations where the next poem or clue can be found based off of that."

"That's amazing news!" Allen said happily, smiling. Lavi nodded.

"We need to tell the Chief about it though; we're probably gonna need to send groups of people pretty much worldwide to these different locations," Lavi warned, noticing how Allen's face fell. Lavi patted the teen on the head, grinning. "Ne, don't worry about it Allen. We'll sort it out somehow."

Allen nodded and gave the red headed Bookman a warm smile before shoving his hand off of his head and getting up to get some food. Link did the same, though he gave Lavi a quick glance before walking away.

"Do you think Komui's gonna let us send all these people out?" Lavi asked, picking at his food. Bookman shrugged.

"We shall have to wait and see what he says. Though, if no-one finds anything, we will be to blame."

The both of them looked slightly worried by that comment, and went back to eating in silence. When Link and Allen returned, with Link holding a tray full of cakes and sweet confectionaries and Allen pulling a trolley along full of a variety of meals, the four of them ate in silence. Eventually, when they had all finished, they simply sat and looked around the Cafeteria hall.

"Well, I'm gonna go for a nap. Catcha guys later!" Lavi said with a grin, standing up and taking his plate with him. Bookman scowled, but let his apprentice go. Allen sat and looked down at his lap, squashing the urge to run after the red head. Link, however, stood up.

"I didn't manage to take a rest earlier but now, after eating, I think I shall try to get some sleep," the blonde said, picking his tray up and managing, just about, to prevent all the empty plates and bowls from toppling over.

"Have a good rest, Link..." Allen murmured, giving the blonde a smile. But the smile was strained, and alarm bells were ringing in the white haired teen's head. Link nodded.

As Link left, Bookman noticed how Allen's face fell and how the teen looked very worried indeed. Over what, Bookman didn't know. Suddenly, Allen turned to face Bookman with a serious expression.

"What is it?" Bookman asked, eyes narrowing. There was a determination in Allen's eyes, and a challenging air that Bookman didn't quite understand.

"What does erasing a personality mean?"

Bookman blinked, confused.

"Where did you get this from?" the old man demanded, leaning forwards slightly. Allen shook his head.

"Answer the question, Bookman."

Allen's tone of voice had turned very harsh all of a sudden, and Bookman swore he saw a glint of amber in Allen's usually silver eyes.

The hairs stood up on the back of Bookman's neck.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The room was quiet as Lavi lay in bed, staring at the ceiling deep in thought. Why did Allen look so concerned? What had happened?

Lavi couldn't help but feel worried; he had a sinking feeling in his stomach that told him something bad was about to happen. He had the same feeling before they entered the Ark, and before they entered the temple in India.

Lavi trusted his gut. And he knew when he needed to be prepared for something troublesome.

As this thought came to mind, the door to the room opened and in stepped Link, his expression unreadable. Lavi sat up as the blonde shut the door behind him and looked him straight in the eye.

"Something up, Two Spot?" Lavi asked, tilting his head. Link didn't even respond to the nickname, and simply sat on the edge of his bed, facing Lavi with a blank expression.

"We need to talk, Bookman Junior."

Lavi frowned at that, confused.

"About what?"

"About Allen."

Lavi froze. A cold chill spread up his spine, and he tried not to gulp nervously and retained a confused but calm mask on the outside despite the alarm bells ringing in his mind.

"What about Allen?" the red head asked, trying to appear concerned instead of panicky. "Is something up?"

"Tell me, Lavi," Link began, interlacing his fingers in his lap. "What do you view Allen as?"

"... I'm not sure I understand where you're going with this..." Lavi murmured, eye narrowing.

"Is he like a brother to you? Simply a friend? Someone you've put your faith in?"

"I've never had any siblings, so I can't really say if he's like a brother."

"Is he just someone you work with then?"

"No. He's an important comrade, just like Lenalee and Yuu are."

"Is that really correct, Bookman?"

Lavi's heart started to hammer in his chest. He knew where Link was heading, and a deep feeling of panic started to rise within him as the blonde CROW continued to talk.

"Would you buy what you bought Walker for his birthday for Lenalee or Kanda?" Link demanded, leaning forwards now. "Would you hold Lenalee or Kanda in an intimate embrace to comfort them? Would you share a bed with either of th-"

"What the hell are you implying?" Lavi interrupted, all his energy being put into not breathing faster and showing the panic that now consumed him.

"You know what I'm implying," was all Link said in reply. "You may be good at reading people and hiding things, but so am I. I can see your nervousness from a mile away, Bookman."

Lavi gritted his teeth, scowling at the blonde before him. He should have been expecting it. He should have known that Link would figure it all out eventually.

"I know that you are not just friends, Lavi," Link said, his tone of voice quieter now. "And I think Bookman knows too; he intends to erase you soon."

Lavi froze, eye widening. His panic levels reached boiling point, and a deep-set horror from his past experiences washed over him like a tidal wave. The red head paled, gripping the bed sheets beneath him so tightly that Link swore they might rip.

_It's breaking._

"And what are you going to do, Inspector?" Lavi asked, voice so quiet and emotionless that it took Link a few seconds to register what Lavi had even asked.

"I... what?"

"Are you going to report us to that bastard Lvellie?"

Lavi looked up then, single eye wide and full of something that Link could not place. Ignoring the insult against his superior, Link gritted his teeth.

"I have to. I have no ch-"

"Of course you have a fucking choice!"

_It's breaking._

Link jumped a little, startled by Lavi's sudden shout. The red head looked angry now, green eye glinting with a repressed aggression that stunned Link. It was as if he was a completely different person to who he was usually.

Was this what happened when Lavi realised he was going to be deleted as if he had never existed?

_It's breaking._

"Why does it even matter to you ? !" Lavi demanded, standing up with clenched fists. "Can't you just leave us be?

"Lavi..."

"It's all the same, isn't it. You humans just have to destroy everything!"

_It's breaking._

"Lavi."

"Nothing good can last, huh ? !"

_Breaking._

"Lavi!"

_BREAKING._

"I don't give a fuck whether you disapprove!"

"LAVI!"

"I just want to be me!"

Pushing Link to the floor, a dark blue tattoo emerged from the right side of Lavi's face, curling under his eye and stopping just before his ear.

Green eye blank and devoid of emotion, Lavi raised his right fist and swung it sharply downwards.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"So... you're saying that the persona is fake?"

"Yes. The persona represents little to none of the person's original self, or at least the persona _shouldn't_ do."

Allen fell silent, silver eyes narrowed in thought. He didn't look up at Bookman, and instead kept his gaze firmly planted on his hands, that were resting in his lap.

"... What happens when the persona is erased?" Allen asked quietly, voice subdued. Bookman narrowed his eyes.

"The true self of that person will take over, and they will either have to create a new persona or stay as themselves," the old man replied, noticing the bitterness that had crept into Allen's expression.

"Kind of like with the Noah and how they take over then..."

Bookman nodded.

"And why do personas need to be deleted?" Allen added, looking up now with a calm that surprised Bookman. The old man sighed.

"As Bookmen, we move from place to place. By having different personas and identities, we can experience events and then process them at a later date from an outsider's point of view almost," Bookman explained. "Because the persona is deleted, the physical and emotional feelings attached with certain memories are erased alongside the persona."

Allen did not ask another question after that, his eyes downcast and morose. Bookman could guess what the teen was getting to, and already knew the answer he would give him.

"You are not meant to have personas for more than a year maximum, Allen Walker. Lavi has been 'Lavi' too long."

Allen flinched.

"Why does he have to be erased though? Why can't you let Lavi decide?"

"'Lavi' is a lie. And all lies must come to light eventually."

"Why can't Lavi decide?"

Allen's tone of voice was practically seething with anger now, his eyes cold and full of venom towards the old man before him. Again, the faintest trace of amber in the teen's eyes made alarm bells ring in Bookman's mind.

"Lavi does not enjoy having his personas removed," the old man replied stiffly, glaring at Allen. "If he had the choice, ultimately his personas would never be erased."

"So why can't he stay as 'Lavi'?" Allen asked, voice quieter now. "Are you telling me that we have to lose him now, when we're nearly at the end of it all?"

The white haired teen looked upset now, face hidden by strands of hair as he looked at the table. Bookman felt no sympathy nor empathy, but nonetheless felt that he had to say something.

"I doubt I will be able to do it soon. I assume the nosy Medic told you?"

"She did... indirectly."

"Earwigging does not suit you, Allen Walker."

"I know..."

"So then, know the truth - I cannot erase Lavi until the war is over. The Order will not let us go as easily as we would wish. However, it will take a while for me to erase him, so I should start now."

Allen looked up, meeting Bookman's gaze. Allen saw no emotion in the old man's eyes so, with a sigh, the white haired teen stood up.

"I'm going to go for another nap..."

Leaving Bookman behind without saying another word, nor waiting for the old man's reply, Allen headed out of the Cafeteria and towards the Dormitories.

Just as Allen reached the edges of the Dorms, he suddenly felt rather dizzy and sick. His head started to pound, and his vision blurred slightly as he walked. Although Allen had intended to talk with Lavi, he now wanted a nap more than anything.

He began to feel worse the closer he got to the room.

By the time the teen reached the door, he felt as if he would pass out any second. His skin seemed to burn, and his forehead felt as if a few dozen pinpricks were being jabbed into his skull. Groaning, and opening the door slowly, Allen took one step inside the room.

And then he froze.

"... You..."

"Oh. Hello Boy."

Standing right before him, covered in blood as he swept his hair backwards, was Tyki Mikk.

Allen's consciousness faded in an instant.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The corridors were eerily silent as Bookman headed towards the Dormitories. It unnerved him, and the old man found himself fingering the scrolls containing his Innocence as he walked forwards.

"I'm getting old," Bookman murmured to himself. "... and paranoid."

For some reason, as he found himself walking past the first set of Dorms, the hairs on the back of his neck started to rise. His heart began to thump louder and, when Bookman reached the door to the room he was sharing with the others, he felt a bead of sweat slide down the side of his face.

What was with this feeling? Bookman was not one for emotions, nor feelings of fear or doubt or anxiety.

Bookmen have no need for a heart.

The door handle was freezing cold in Bookman's palm, counteracting the warm clamminess of his hand as he gently pushed the door open.

The almost metallic smell of blood hit Bookman first.

With a sickening squish the old man's feet sunk into the blood-soaked carpet, the red liquid pooling around his shoes. The whole room was covered in ruby red blood, with little to none of the room retaining it's original colour.

Sitting in one corner of the room, eye wide and blank, was Lavi. The red head looked deeply traumatised; he looked almost identical to the boy Bookman brought into Headquarters, covered in blood and in a catatonic state. Lavi was covered in blood but, from what Bookman could see, he was not wounded.

Standing motionless in the middle of the room was Allen. As Bookman edged forwards cautiously, he noticed with a jolt that the white haired teen's eyes were a pure shimmering amber in colour, the pupils resembling those of a cat. The teen's skin was dark, like a Noah's, and the blood that soaked Allen's clothing and left hand especially made a shudder slide down Bookman's spine. But Allen wasn't injured either.

So who had been hurt enough to produce so much blood?

Turning around slowly, Bookman almost missed the figure half-slumped against the wall, large spatters of blood imprinting the wall behind, and a large pool surrounding the figure. The figure's chest looked completely disfigured and torn to shreds, the outline of ribs stark against the bloody red of torn flesh, organs, and blood vessels.

Edging closer, Bookman tried to discern who the figure was, heart thumping wildly in his chest. Then he froze.

Blonde hair. Tied in a loose plait. Bookman had almost missed it due to the volumes of blood clinging to the once vibrant locks.

Howard Link was dead. But who killed him?

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (japanese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**... Please don't hurt me *flees* I've been wanting to write this for ages! This is what I've been building up to folks, so get ready for one hell of a next chapter XD**

**Please review, and I'm sorry to those I haven't replied to - I lose track of everyone sometimes, and forget to reply to people ^^" Sorry!**

**Much love ~**

**xrowa-chanx**


	15. Chapter 13: Falling From Grace

**Hey everyone! Ever since I found this laptop, I can type loads really quickly so I might just be able to update more than once a week XD The past few days have been really busy though, and most of this was written in a moment of insomnia so... yeah... ^^"**

**To make it really clear, Lavi snaps like he does because of the events of the past few days taking its toll on his mental state - Link mentioning his possible erasure and the potential loss of Allen makes Lavi snap mentally. So yeah, fun times :L**

**Btw, I am soon writing a lemon oneshot for Lavi and Allen for Kimura Yumi soon – it's gonna be… interesting :L**

**Thank you to sammi117, MidnightAbyssx02, kh07gl, Stavarn100, Hanashi o suru, Kimura Yumi, A Lucid Silhouette, Shirubia-kurosaki77, Lingering Sorrow, Haruhi Smith, and moyashi bakanda for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing. I love you all *heart***

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_You poor, sweet, innocent thing_

_Dry your eyes_

_And testify_

_You know you live to break me_

_Don't deny_

_Sweet Sacrifice_

Evanescence - Sweet Sacrifice

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 13 - Falling From Grace

"Lavi? Lavi, come out of it you damn idiotic brat!"

The sound of Bookman slapping his apprentice round the face resounded throughout the room. There was no response, making Bookman sigh in frustration.

Lavi's single eye was blank and completely devoid of any sign of life at all, glassy and much darker in colour than its usual emerald green. The red head was pale, the blood spatters covering him standing out brightly against his skin, his Exorcist uniform torn in places and drenched in blood.

"What the hell happened here?"

No-one answered Bookman's question. Allen was still stood absolutely still, eyes wide and swirling with a mixture of emotions and feelings. Bookman couldn't rouse Allen anymore than he could Lavi, and the frustration and general confusion at the whole situation was making Bookman's head hurt.

He didn't even want to think of how the Council would react to all of this.

"Book... man..."

The old man froze. He turned around slowly, hands near his Innocence if he needed it.

Allen was swaying on the spot, eyes half-lidden and slowly turning from a bright amber to their usual metallic silver, Innocence deactivating and turning back to its regular form. The white haired teen's skin faded from dark brown to white, and he fell to his knees, blinking and frowning.

"Allen?" Bookman asked quietly, edging towards the teen carefully. Allen looked up then, looking more alert though severely confused.

"I don't... how did..."

Allen frowned, searching his memory fervently. He remembered leaving the Cafeteria, heading towards the Dormitories. He then felt sick, and decided to have a nap. But, when he entered the room, he saw -

"Tyki!" Allen cried, eyes wide. He stood up and almost teetered over, clasping a hand to his head as dizziness consumed him. He looked around, not really processing anything but the missing presence of the Noah of Pleasure. Bookman blinked.

"... Tyki was here?" the old man questioned, standing up and narrowing his eyes. Allen nodded.

"I saw him just before... I... passed out..."

The teen faltered, eyes widening, mouth dropping open. He had come to his senses, and finally realised the blood covering himself and everything else. He looked around numbly, from the comatose Lavi in one corner, to the corpse of Link in the other, to the blood drenching him from head to toe, especially over his left hand.

"Wh-wh-wh-what ? !"

Allen started to breathe faster, panic flooding his veins. He didn't remember anything. He didn't remember anything. As his heart thudded hard and fast in his chest, Allen walked past Bookman and knelt beside Lavi, chest heaving as he began to hyperventilate.

"L-Lavi?"

Raising a shaking hand to the red head's face, Allen touched Lavi's cheek before falling backwards, noticing the absolute lack of response from the teen.

"No..."

Turning around swiftly and treating Bookman like he wasn't even there, Allen practically ran up to Link, horror filling his expression.

"No no no no no no!"

Allen fell to his knees and hid his face in his hands, bile rising at the sight of Link's decimated body. Sobs racked the teen's body as he wept bitterly, not knowing what on Earth happened and who was to blame.

Bookman did nothing, eyeing Allen with a blank expression. Then, silently, Bookman took out one of the scrolls he had kept in his coat and calmly wrapped it around Link's corpse, blood soon staining the white parchment a deep ruby red in colour.

"Get up."

Allen looked up, tears creating rivulets down his face through the blood covering him.

"Pick Lavi up and follow me. No arguments."

Nodding numbly, too emotionally distraught to think for himself, Allen stood up and walked up to Lavi, expression pained as he carried the red head in his arms.

Picking up Link, Bookman opened the door and headed outside, checking to see if it was empty. By some form of miracle the corridor was deserted so, beckoning Allen to follow, Bookman headed down the end of the hallway and down the stairs.

Just as the pair of them were heading down the dark hallway towards the abandoned Training Halls, the sound of running footsteps made them both jump.

"Bookman! Allen-chan!"

Medic stopped dead when she saw who Allen was carrying, and the blood soaked scroll in Bookman's arms.

"... Wh-what the hell is going on? And what the fuck is in that scroll ? !" Medic cried alarmed. She ran straight up to Allen, eyes wide at his blood-covered state and the blank-eyed and motionless Lavi.

"We do not have time for this, Medic. Either follow us or leave."

The blunt remark from Bookman made Medic flinch. Without saying a word more, Bookman continued walking down the hallway. Allen didn't move, staring blankly at the floor, before Bookman beckoned him to follow.

"Allen...chan..."

As the white haired teen walked away, expression broken and haunted looking, Medic instantly followed, concern and worry and mild panic spreading through her like wild fire.

Eventually, the three of them reached the Hall where Allen had created the Gate connecting Bookman Headquarters to the Black Order. Luckily for them all, Allen hadn't closed it when they passed through it earlier on that day.

Dimly thinking that Tyki could have gotten in that way, Allen simply stared numbly at the white pillar of light, mind on complete shutdown.

"You're going to the Order?" Medic demanded, frowning. "But..."

"Link is dead, and we've potentially got a Noah involved in his death," Bookman stated, expression apathetic. "We must leave before the Council discovers the state our room was left in. I will return and explain it to them later."

Medic said nothing in reply, eyes wide with shock, realising what was in the scroll in Bookman's arms.

Silently, Bookman started to head into the Ark. Then -

"What's going to happen?"

Bookman turned towards Allen. The teen still looked completely shell-shocked, but there was a faint glimmer of panic and fear appearing in his eyes and expression as it all came crashing down on him.

"I don't know," Bookman replied, voice quiet. "I don't know at all."

And, with that, the old man stepped through the pillar and disappeared from view. Following with dragging feet, Allen also stepped through the Gate, leaving Medic alone in the Training Hall.

"_Mataku_..." she cursed, sighing and clenching her fists. Then, with an intake of breath, Medic entered the Ark.

"Close it."

Just as Medic stepped through, Allen closed the Gate behind her, deleting the connection between Bookman HQ and the Order. Medic blinked, still startled by the abrupt change in scenery.

"Which door, Allen?" Bookman asked, turning around to face the white haired teen. Allen flinched, remembering Lavi saying the exact same thing earlier on that day. Things were starting to sink in, making Allen tremble and breathe faster.

"Th-that one."

Gesturing towards a nearby door, Allen walked towards it and stood there, motionless. Then, knowing that everything was about to get a million times worse, Allen pushed the door open.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

It had been a stressful day.

Having to deal with the Komlin incident, and having a stand-up fight with Kanda over his sister, which ended with Kanda nearly decapitating him with Mugen, had drained Komui greatly.

It was the perfect excuse to take an evening nap.

Just as Komui was getting comfortable, and reminiscing on Lenalee's younger years and how cute and innocent she used to be, the sound of running footsteps made the Chinese man sit up. He blinked blearily as the door to his office slammed open, Reever sprinting up to his desk.

"What are you doing here?" Komui whinged, pouting. "I was very busy work-"

"We need you downstairs right now, Chief," Reever interrupted, voice grave. "We've got one hell of a situation on our hands."

Komui stood up, going from childish to serious in an instant.

"What's happened?" he asked, leaving his desk and walking beside Reever as they headed down the corridor outside.

"It's... it's really bad..." Reever replied quietly, looking down at his feet with a pained expression. "Inspector Link is dead."

Komui stopped dead, eyes wide.

"... How?" he breathed, shocked. Reever clenched his fists.

"We don't know for sure. Lavi's been put in some sort of mental coma, Bookman didn't arrive until afterwards, and Allen looks like he's going to break down any second."

Komui was speechless. After a while, when the silence was punctuated solely by the sound of his and Reever's footsteps, the Chief of the Black Order looked up to meet Reever's gaze.

"Do any of them have any idea what could have happened?" Komui questioned. Reever nodded, eyes narrowing.

"Allen told Bookman that he saw Tyki Mikk, a member of the Noah Clan, but he couldn't remember what happened after that. But..."

"What?"

"When Bookman entered the room, the 14th was in control of Allen's body. And he's just as covered in blood as Lavi is."

Komui stopped dead at that, panic starting to build up inside of him.

"... Central are going to think Allen did it..."

As he said this, Komui started to run down the corridor, pelting it down the nearby staircase with Reever following close behind.

The both of them soon made it to the main lower floor, and it was absolute chaos. Komui could see members of CROW heading in the same direction down the corridor, and he could clearly see Kanda and Lenalee trying to run past them.

Eventually, all of them reached the hall where Gate transitions took place.

Standing, surrounded by members of CROW with Lvellie pushing him to the ground, was Allen. He looked frightened, but angry too. His Innocence wasn't activated.

Medic and Matron were sitting beside Lavi, who still just as unresponsive as before. No matter what the two of them did, the red head did not respond.

Bookman simply stood and watched.

"I didn't kill him!"

Lvellie glared at the teen beneath him, eyes glinting.

"Then why are you resisting?" the man demanded, clasping Allen by the head harshly and leaning in closer. "Who killed the Inspector then?"

"I don't know!" Allen cried, frustrated. "I can't remember wh-"

"Lies."

With a gesture of his hand, one of the members of CROW stepped forward and sealed his left arm, making the white haired teen keel over onto his side.

"What on Earth is going on?"

Stepping forward and taking action, Komui walked right up to Lvellie and met his gaze, eyes hard. Behind them, Kanda had managed to stop Lenalee from getting involved, a firm hand grasping her arm tightly.

"Is there something wrong, Chief Komui?" Lvellie demanded cooly, tilting his head and smirking slightly. Komui did not react to the Inspector's cocky countenance, and looked down at Allen, noticing the spectra of emotions in the teen's eyes, and the blood that still covered him, marring his usually snowy-white hair.

"I want to know why you are detaining one of my Exorcists," Komui replied just as cooly, looking back up at Lvellie. The Inspector's eyes narrowed.

"The Exorcists belong to the Vatican, not you. I am free to detain one of them if I view him as a threat."

"And how is Allen a threat? Do you have any clear proof that he killed Inspector Link and hurt Lavi?"

"Who else could have done it? He claims he saw another Noah there, but the Bookman Clan have protection against the Noah Clan. There would be no way for Tyki Mikk to have –"

"The Gate was left open though, wasn't it?"

Everyone fell into a deathly quiet silence, turning towards Medic. The brunette was wringing her hands nervously, knowing that it wasn't her place to speak at all. But she met the stares of the other Order members defiantly, standing up and looking at Lvellie with a cool countenance.

"If the Ark Gate connecting this place to Bookman HQ was left open, could a Noah pass through that way?" Medic asked, meeting Allen's eyes and smiling reassuringly. "Our protection wouldn't be able to stop that from happening."

"May I ask who you even are?" Lvellie demanded, eyes narrowing. "You are not a member of the Black Order."

"She is the medic of the Bookman Clan," Bookman replied. "She has been with us for most of our time at the Clan building."

"You can't just bring members of your Clan here without permission!" Lvellie spat, expression furious. "Know your limits, Bookman. CROW."

At his instruction, CROW made their way towards Medic. The brunette looked afraid, and Matron stood up, prepared to intervene if necessary; she had met with and talked to Medic earlier on that day, and had already grown to like the young doctor.

"Don't. Touch. Her."

The utter venom in Allen's voice made the CROW freeze. The teen was sitting up now, silver eyes glinting menacingly. Lvellie looked back at the teen and glared at him.

"And why sh-"

"Lock me away if that's what you want. Accuse me of murder and execute me if you want. But leave Medic alone."

"Allen!"

Both Medic and Lenalee cried the teen's name at the same time, being held back by Matron and Kanda respectively. Komui, Reever, and Lvellie all turned to stare at the boy, surprised.

"So you admit to taking Inspector Link's life?" Lvellie questioned, leaning forward. Allen met his gaze with a blank expression.

"I just don't want innocent people getting hurt," Allen answered, eyes flicking towards Lavi. The teen flinched, looking away with pained eyes. Lvellie smirked.

"Fully seal him and take him away. And don't intervene, Chief Komui," Lvellie added, turning towards the man. "Your jurisdiction only goes so far."

And, with that, the CROW made their way back to Allen, sealing him so that he was unable to move. One of the CROW then picked the teen up and started to make his way out of the hall.

"No! Allen!"

Lenalee shoved Kanda away from her, running towards Allen and trying to pull him out of the CROW's grasp. The man dropped Allen harshly, and back-handed the girl so that she flew straight into her brother's arms. Then, picking Allen up again, the CROW left the hall, the other members leaving with him.

Allen had fallen from grace. And the light that Lavi had always feared Allen would lose was extinguished.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The infirmary was quiet, the dull sound of a ticking clock nearby disturbing the silence. Medic and Lenalee both sat by Lavi's bedside, concern etched on their faces. Kanda and Bookman stood a few feet away, both looking apathetic as Matron inspected their red headed comrade.

"He has no significant injuries," Matron murmured, laying the teen back down after she checked his ribs. Lavi was still awake; his eye stared blankly forward, deep and dark and lost somewhere where no-one could bring him back. He hadn't reacted at all when Matron washed him down and dressed him in clean clothes.

"So… what's wrong with him then?" Lenalee asked, looking up at Matron with red-rimmed eyes; the girl had only just stopped crying a few minutes earlier, and a bruise had already started to appear on her cheek. Matron sighed.

"He's showing signs of deep mental trauma – when people go through something horrific, they shut themselves out from the real world until they feel ready enough to come out again," Matron explained, looking down at the unresponsive teen before her with a sadness in her eyes. "But I don't know what could have done that – would Inspector Link's death really have affected him so badly?"

Everyone was silent for a while, lost in their own thoughts. Then, sighing a little, Medic reached across Lavi's bed and held one of his hands loosely, rubbing a thumb across his hand back and forth.

"He's been like this before…"

All but Bookman turned towards Medic with a frown.

"When?" Lenalee asked, confused. Medic sighed again.

"I was the one who took care of him when he first came to Bookman Headquarters," she explained, smiling bitterly. "He went through something… awful… as a child, and was brought in catatonic and covered in blood."

"If he experienced something that made him think back to then…" Matron murmured. "It would cause him to react in a similar way."

"_Naruhodo_. He was like that for at least two months before he came to, and since this wouldn't be as traumatic as back then…"

"He should come to sooner than before."

Both Matron and Medic nodded at each other, smiling. Lenalee and Kanda remained silent; they knew almost nothing about Lavi, and what they had just been told made them wonder what the red head hid behind his usually carefree and happy smiles.

"This inconveniences us greatly though…" Bookman muttered, closing his eyes. "Especially when we need our numbers as high as possible.

"We'll manage," Kanda stated, crossing his arms. "Those two are such stubborn fucking retards that they'll come out of this fine."

"Kanda…"

Everyone turned towards the Japanese Exorcist, stunned. The teen scowled.

"What? Gotta problem?"

Lenalee laughed, then smiled at Kanda warmly.

"No, it's alright," she replied, amused. Then, she turned towards Bookman. "Did you find out what you wanted about the poems?"

"Yes," the old man answered. "I need to see Chief Komui at some point to inform him on what we discovered."

"But surely you should wait until this situation with Allen is sorted out," Medic said, turning to face Bookman with an incredulous expression.

"We do not have any time to waste," he answered, shaking his head. "If Tyki Mikk was the one who killed Howard Link, then they might have started to realise that we know something that they do not. We need to find the other poems and clues before they do."

Medic didn't reply, turning back towards Lavi forlornly.

"It'll be alright," Lenalee murmured quietly, placing a hand on Medic's shoulder comfortingly. "_Ge-ge_ won't let them do anything drastic to Allen. We'll sort this out."

Medic gave the girl beside her a small smile. Then, smiling also, Matron made her way to the infirmary door and opened it, turning to face everyone else.

"Well, you should all leave Lavi be to rest," she said, trying not to laugh as Lenalee pouted at her. "I will sedate him to make him sleep properly if need be. You can stay though, Medic. I wish to talk more with you."

So, with that, everyone but Medic left the room. Lenalee turned to give Lavi one last look.

"Get better soon, Lavi…"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"So… you're telling me that he will be kept in captivity until Link's autopsy has been completed?"

"Yes. He will be off-duty until then."

Komui sank back in his chair, removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose with a frustrated sigh.

"We can't do anything more for him right now, Chief," Jiji said quietly, giving Komui a sympathetic look. "We should just feel glad that the kid isn't being excommunicated, tortured and executed."

The man before him didn't reply to that, staring at the stacks of paper on his desk tiredly. He wanted to help Allen; he didn't believe that he had killed Link, even if the 14th had taken over. And for the teen to sacrifice himself and his reputation for the sake of the others pained Komui.

Suddenly, a knock at the door.

"Come in."

The door opened, revealing Bookman carrying a large scroll in his arms. Komui blinked, confused.

"Bookman? What is it?" he asked, frowning. The old man sat down on the couch in front of Komui's desk, lying the scroll in his arms on the floor.

"Considering the current situation, and the possible involvement of the Noah Clan," Bookman began, tucking his hands up his sleeves. "I have something I need to raise with you so that we can take action immediately."

"… Okay…" Komui murmured, eyes narrowing. "Go on."

"Before the incident that led to Inspector Link's death, myself and Lavi discovered the meaning behind one of the poems," Bookman continued. "We believe that we know of a number of locations where the next poem or clue could be."

"Where are these locations? How many of them are there?"

"There are 10 locations in total: Vatican City in Rome, Götaland in South Sweden, Bergen in Norway, Palermo in Sicily, the south east coast of England, Jerusalem in Israel, Youxi in the Fujian Province of China, San Gregoro Magno al Celio Monastery in Rome, Hallvardskirken in Oslo, and the Toxas Altas monastery in the Galicia region of Portugal."

"... That's a lot..." Komui muttered, already feeling worried about the potential risks, and costs, of what Bookman intended for him to do.

"I believe that the next poem or clue will be in one of those locations," Bookman stated, tone firm. "I cannot be sure, but..."

"I understand."

The both of them remained quiet for quiet for a while. Jiji looked between the two of them, frowning in confusion; he hadn't heard about the poems whatsoever.

"So, I'm guessing you wish for me to send people out to these locations, am I correct?" Komui asked, leaning forward a little. Bookman nodded.

"If the Noah were involved in all of this, we should make our move as quickly as possible," the old man explained with a gesture of his hand. "And if Central were to find out about this, Gates would be needed to all of these places."

Komui fell silent, stunned. Then, both himself and Jiji grinned.

"You, old man, are a genius," Jiji cried, clapping a hand on Bookman's shoulder. The old man didn't reply, though the slight upturn of his lips made Komui grin further.

Central wanted to find the Heart as soon as possible. And, if they wanted to find it, they needed Allen alive and out of imprisonment.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The darkness felt forbidding, and the chains and seals keeping Allen fixed to the spot made him feel irrationally fearful of the shadows surrounding him. The only light source came from a tiny window above him but, because it was now night, no light illuminated Allen's cell.

It made him remember times during his training with Cross, where he had ended up being tied up by various thugs after his master's money and left in dark unwholesome places on his own.

Cringing, and trying to move into a more comfortable position, Allen tried to keep his mind clear of everything and anything. He wouldn't think of his master. He wouldn't think of the death of someone he had begun to value as a friend. He wouldn't think about the one person who meant the world to him who was now mentally destroyed.

He wouldn't think about the blood that still covered him.

Curling up a little on the floor, Allen buried his face in his knees and closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths in and out to try and calm his fluttering heart. He had shut it all out before; all the pain and doubt and mistrust in himself.

He could do it all again.

As time passed, the teen eventually began to look more composed, his eyes looking dull but less wild and more devoid of emotion. After a while, Allen sat up and stared blankly at the darkness before him, mind calm and empty of thoughts and feelings.

As always, his mask would help him survive and keep going.

A sudden crash as the door to his cell slammed open made Allen jump and emit a startled squeak, eyes wide as he tried to look through the impenetrable darkness at his visitor.

The sudden sight of something gold hitting him in the face made Allen scream.

"T-T-Timcampy ? !"

Allen sat up, rubbing his face as the golden golem before him stroked his face with his wings and bobbed about excitedly. Allen chuckled, smiling warmly as he patted Timcampy on the head.

"It's been a while, hmm Tim?"

"What, no greeting for me brat?"

Allen froze as he saw a figure step forwards, the gold lined black cloak and familiar long locks of red hair alerting the teen to the figure's identity immediately.

"U-Uhh... Hello, Master?" Allen stammered tentatively, backing away fearfully as Cross walked towards him and leaned forwards, blowing cigarette smoke in his face. The man narrowed his eyes, then settled for kicking his apprentice in the face before standing back a little, putting his cigarette in his mouth.

"You need to be more careful," Cross muttered, chuckling as Allen fell back and clutched his face, making pained noises. "Those Central Admin bastards aren't gonna go easy on you."

"I know..." Allen ground out, sitting up with a very red face, pouting as he rubbed his cheek.

The both of them were silent for a while, Allen playing with Tim's wings idly as he sat in silence. When Cross finished his cigarette, he threw it on the ground and trod on it, crushing the roll of paper and tobacco into the cold concrete floor.

"How's Lavi?" Allen asked, finally looking up to meet Cross' eye with a worried expression. "Has Matron figured out what's wrong?"

"How am I meant to know, brat," Cross replied bluntly, scowling. "I just came down here to bother you."

"Thanks for the company," Allen muttered, tone sarcastic. His master scowled even more and leant forward, smiling sadistically.

"What was that?"

Allen flinched, leaning backwards and smiling sheepishly. Deciding to drop it, because torturing his already broken student wasn't all that fun, Cross shook his head slightly and started to walk away.

"Uh... Master?" Allen questioned, tilting his head. Cross stopped, still facing away from his apprentice.

"Hey, Allen... Come to think of it, I've never asked you this before, but do you like Tim?"

Allen didn't answer, confused. His master continued to talk, back still facing the white haired teen.

"I asked you to keep hold of him for me but, to be honest, I was always planning on giving him to you."

"... Master?"

"I've told Tim to do as he likes from now on."

"B-but why? Isn't he staying with you?"

"You may not want to listen to me -"

Cross said this more loudly, turning to face Allen a little. His apprentice looked severely confused and slightly worried, head tilted to one side as he tried to grasp where Cross was going with it.

"You may not want to listen to me," Cross repeated, folding his arms. "Knowing that I'm carrying on the 14th's will. But in case you're thinking you're being made to walk a path that me and the 14th chose for you, I just wanted to tell you - you're wrong."

Allen blinked, eyes widening.

"A path is something you create as you walk it," Cross murmured, taking another cigarette from his coat pocket and lighting it. "The ground you've trodden hardens, and that's what forms your path. You are the only one who can create your own path. So stop wearing that mask of "Mana"..."

"M-Master!" Allen stammered, sitting up sharply. He stared at the man before him, confused and wondering why on Earth Cross was acting like he was.

"Walk, on your own. If you haven't given up yet, that is..."

And, with that, Cross Marian exited the cell and left Allen in the darkness with only Timcampy for company.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Shrine was quiet, the corridor outside empty and devoid of people, allowing the two people inside to meditate in peace.

Or at least they would have been able to, if one of them would calm down and actually meditate.

"If you have something to say, goddamn say it already," Kanda muttered, eyebrow twitching as he tried to maintain his concentration. Lenalee sighed and wrung her hands, opening her eyes and staring down at her lap with a morose expression.

"First Marie, then Lavi and Allen..." Lenalee said quietly, strands of raven black hair shielding her face. "Everyone seems to be being taken away from us..."

Kanda didn't reply to that, sighing a little and continuing to try and meditate. After a while, during which Lenalee continued to fidget and look troubled, Kanda opened his eyes and turned towards her, trying his best not to lose his temper.

"Look. _Baka usagi_ and _moyashi_ might be in trouble, but they'll be fine. They're too fucking annoying not to. _Baka usagi_ will wake up and act as if nothing happened, asking for food then falling asleep, and _moyashi_ will smile as always and be as fucking naieve as usual. Stop worrying."

Lenalee blinked, eyes wide, staring at Kanda with a stunned expression (for the second time that day). The teen before her simply scowled, turning away moodily. Then, smiling warmly, Lenalee placed a hand on Kanda's shoulder.

"Thank you, Kanda."

"Che, fine. Now quit disturbing me and fucking meditate already."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Why was this kept from me?"

Lvellie was scowling, eyes full of a growing fury and anger towards the men sitting in front of him. Both Bookman and Komui shared a look, then met the Inspector's gaze steadily.

"We feared that by informing Central, we posed the risk of the news spreading. We didn't want the Noah to find out about this," Komui explained, resting his head in the palm of his hand. "We feel that, now, we need to make our move before it's too late."

Lvellie was silent for a while, sipping from a cup of tea slowly as he thought on what he had been told. Then, placing his cup down onto a saucer and picking up a small cupcake, the man bit into it, chewed, and swallowed, keeping his eyes firmly planted on both Komui and Bookman.

"So, if we follow the poems and clues, we will eventually find the Heart?" Lvellie demanded, eating the rest of the cake slowly with relish.

"We believe that is so," Bookman answered, nodding. "We cannot be sure, however."

"Then what are we waiting for! Send out Exorcists and Finders to those locations and find those poems and clues before the Noah Clan do!" Lvellie exclaimed, gesturing with his hand as he spoke, spraying crumbs over himself and the couch that he was sitting on.

"There lies the problem," Komui murmured, voice quiet. Lvellie frowned.

"Oh? And what is the problem, Chief Komui?"

"These locations are world-wide. If we sent people out to all of them, it would take months, maybe even years, to find them all. By that time, I doubt we would have found the Heart, and the war would be won in the Earl's favour."

"How do you suggest that we send everyone out?"

"The Ark."

Lvellie fell silent, eyes glinting and narrowing. He glared at Komui.

"Allen Walker is currently under suspicion for murder and treason, if you had conveniently forgotten earlier," the man spat, leaning forward a little. "Your clever ploy will not wo-"

"Allen can create Ark Gates without using his Innocence, or even his hands, correct?"

Lvellie fell silent at Bookman's remark, sitting back in his seat and frowning.

"Yes, that is correct," he answered. "Why does that matter?"

"If you suspect Allen of murder, and feel concerned that he will kill members of the Order, keep his arms sealed so that he will be unable to do so," Bookman replied, tucking his hands into the sleeves of his coat. "But, if you let him be free to walk around the Order, he will be able to create Ark Gates as close to these locations as possible."

"That way," Komui added, smiling. "We might even be able to find the Heart before Spring arrives."

Lvellie didn't reply; he sat in silence, staring at the mug of tea before him with narrowed eyes deep in thought. Eventually, when both Komui and Bookman were starting to wonder if the Inspector would ever speak, Lvellie looked up and nodded, albeit reluctantly.

"Fine. I will release Allen from his cell. But not until I have travelled to Central and informed them about all of this," Lvellie stated, standing up. "I will be gone a few days, however, so he will have to stay in captivity until then."

With the click of his heels, the Inspector left the room, leaving behind his unfinished mug of tea. Bookman and Komui sighed in relief.

"Well... that went better than I hoped..."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- mataku = an expression of annoyance (japanese)

- naruhodo = indeed (japanese)

- ge-ge = big brother (mandarin chinese)

- baka usagi = stupid rabbit (japanese)

- moyashi = beansprout (japanese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Well, that's the end of this chapter. I'm gonna center on the groups setting out to find the next poem/clue from now on, with regular snippets of Allen angsting and angsting some more, and Lavi... well, Lavi being a vegetable :L**

**Oh, and have any of you realised that I left a huge clue in one of the first chapters about *cough* something that *cough* just *cough cough* ... :L**

***winks***

**OH! And Cross' speech to Allen is taken from the manga :'3**

**Love you all!**

**xrowa-chanx**


	16. Chapter 14: By Process Of Elimination

**Hey everyone ~ ! :'D**

**Thank you so so much for all the support everyone ~ I love you all :') Thanks specifically to MidnightAbyssx02, Kimura Yumi, Hanashi o suru, Shirubia-kurosaki77, A Lucent Silhouette, sammi117, kh07gl, moonphase95, CheshyCatGrin, patrick the almighty observer, Hostage-To-Memories for reviewing/favouriting/subscribing ~**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_As reason clouds my eyes with splendour fading,_

_Illusions of the sunlight,_

_And the reflection of a lie will keep me waiting,_

_Love gone for so long._

_And I've lost who I am,_

_And I can't understand_

_Why my heart is so broken_

_Rejecting your love_

_Without love gone wrong,_

_Lifeless words carry on._

Trading Yesterday - Shattered

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 14 - By Process Of Elimination

The morning sun rose outside, some dim rays of light filtering through a small window, slowly lighting up the cell that Allen was trapped within. The darkness faded away, though there was nothing of value to see.

Unfolding its wings and getting up on its little legs, Timcampy looked around the cell and decided that Allen should have been awake already. Fluttering upwards so that it was beside Allen's face, Timcampy patted the teen on the cheek softly at first, then harder when Allen refused to wake up.

Biting Allen on the cheek did the trick perfectly.

"AHHHH!"

Jolting awake, attempting to sit upwards, and then forgetting that he was sealed, Allen fell onto his side with a huff, hair in front of his face. He could see enough, however, to notice the huge grin on Timcampy's face.

"Ha ha, very funny Tim," Allen muttered with a pout, sitting up slowly and scowling at his much heavier left arm. "Did you have to wake me up like that?"

The golden golem nodded, giving Allen a toothy grin. The white haired teen sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

Allen was not happy. Not at all.

Leaning back with an ill-tempered huff, Allen scowled at the brightening room, already sick of the pale grey decour and the dust covering the floor. He even swore he saw spiders living in the darkened corners of the cell, but that wouldn't have been a surprise anyway - he doubted the place was ever cleaned.

Allen sighed, closing his eyes a little. He had counted five sunrises already, and knew that he was going to be in the cell for a very long time, knowing Central and how they were with traitors. He doubted they'd let the others see him either.

As this came to mind, the teen thought of Lavi and flinched, looking down at his free right hand and sealed left hand with a pained expression. He still didn't know whether it was him, Tyki, or some unknown reason that had left Lavi in such a state of mind. Allen could not put away the image of the red head's blank expression, devoid of emotion, feeling, and even life.

It was as if Lavi was dead.

Allen shook his head violently at that thought, closing his eyes tightly. Lavi _was_ still alive; he just needed to be brought back from whatever place he had got himself trapped within.

"I want to help you..."

Allen said this mostly to himself, trying to fight back tears. He wanted to be upstairs with the rest of the Order, trying to help bring Lavi back, or simply sit beside him and wait, talking to him and being there for him for when he did wake up.

But Allen could not. He was trapped, with no knowledge of when he would be let out.

Would he ever be allowed to see Lavi again? Would he even be allowed to see any of his friends again? Allen didn't know.

And, from a selfish point of view, he needed his friends to be there for him too. The death of Link was heavy on his conscience, and Allen would have given anything to see Lenalee smile and tell him that she believed he was innocent.

Even if it was a lie, he wanted to believe that he was innocent.

Allen knew that the 14th could have taken over. He knew that seeing Tyki might have sparked the Noah memory inside of him to come to the forefront, if only for a little while. He knew that the 14th could have been violent enough to hurt anything that got in his way.

Even Link. Even Lavi.

With a heavy sigh, Allen leant against the wall behind him and closed his eyes fully, knowing that the only entertainment he would gain would be from sleep or Timcampy.

Said golem was playing with the seals around Allen's legs curiously, biting a little at the corners of the pieces of paper, and wincing when slight jolts of energy made it spasm. Allen scarcely noticed Timcampy, and tried to clear his thoughts and enter into some sort of blissful ignorance for a while.

It failed.

Groaning in frustration, Allen sat up fully and reached for Tim with his right hand, unable to hold back a grin as the gold golem rubbed against his face affectionately.

"I'm glad you're here Tim. I'm glad you're here..."

Allen stroked the golem's wings a little, smiling as it sunk into his hand and seemed to relax almost, nuzzing his fingers softly. Then, all of a sudden, Tim sat up and leant backwards, opening its jaws wide.

It was going to play a memory.

Usually Timcampy needed someone to ask to see a memory. So, for the golem to play one of its own accord was a little strange.

"... Tim...?" Allen called, looking down at his hand with a confused frown. The white haired teen jumped as a memory suddenly formed before his eyes.

At first, all the teen could see were blue skies. Then, Allen noticed the sound of many Akuma, yelling and calling triumphantly. The sound of something heading closer at high speed became louder and louder, and when the view changed Allen saw several missiles flying towards Timcampy. Suddenly, a familiar cry made Allen sit up straighter, eyes widening. Lenalee had appeared out of nowhere, destroying the missiles.

"… When was this?" Allen asked quietly, frowning a little. Tim didn't answer, and continued to play the memory.

Lenalee cried Timcampy's name happily, reaching out for him and holding the golem to her chest in a tight hug. In the background, Allen saw a large pillar of fire and knew that Lavi was there too. This was confirmed when the red head used his Innocence to travel to the outcrop of rock that Lenalee was on, expression morose.

_Where's Allen?_

Allen froze at that, now knowing where this memory was from.

As he saw the three of them reach the bamboo forest where Tyki had tried to take his life, Allen clenched his right fist tightly. Lenalee and Lavi were trying to figure out where he was, and what had happened to him. Lavi grabbed Tim suddenly, demanding him to show them where Allen was.

Then Timcampy showed them.

Allen could not see the memories that Tim played; he could only hear them. He could see Lavi and Lenalee's reactions as well though.

Lenalee looked on the verge of tears throughout the entire thing, eventually crying out and hiding her face when Tyki destroyed Allen's Innocence. It pained Allen to see Lenalee look so upset. Lavi looked more and more blank as the memories continued, single eye turning emotionless as Allen sent Timcampy away with Suman's Innocence.

The memory stopped then and, as Lavi analysed out loud what he had seen, Lenalee stumbled forward until she eventually saw the huge bloodstain that Allen had left in his wake, crying now as she knelt down and wept bitterly.

Lavi did not comfort her. He walked straight past her, heading towards something that Allen could not see at first. Then, with wide eyes, Allen saw Lavi pick up an Ace of Spades, expression still emotionless. His golem started relaying a message from Bookman, telling the two of them to come back.

_It might take a while for us to get back…_

It was only then, when the golem stopped sending Bookman's message, that Lavi allowed himself to show some emotion. For a brief moment the red head looked heartbroken, looking from the playing card in his hand to Lenalee with a hurt expression.

He didn't shed a single tear. But his expression said enough.

Timcampy stopped playing the memory, turning to face Allen. The teen didn't say anything for a long time, simply staring into space with a clenched fist and screwed-shut eyes. Eventually, when he opened his eyes and looked down at the golem before him, Allen held Tim close to his chest and sighed, smiling a little.

"Thank you…"

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The infirmary was quiet, the slowly rising sun brightening the room gradually as sunlight streamed in through the windows.

Medic was sat, slumped and fast asleep, by Lavi's bedside, mouth hanging slightly open as she snored softly. Matron was awake, however, and had been watching the red head sleep for a few hours. She hadn't given him a sedative at first but, after having to watch him stay awake and unresponsive for an entire night, Matron gave in and gave him sedatives every night for the past four nights, preferring his now peaceful expression and closed eye opposed to the blank-eyed and dead stare from before.

"Morning…"

Turning around, Matron saw Lenalee in the doorway to the room, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and smiling sadly. The teen walked forwards, shoes clicking on the tiles below.

"How is he?" Lenalee asked, kneeling beside Lavi's bed and smiling at the peace evident on the red head's face. Matron sighed.

"He is no different. I gave him a sedative again earlier, so he could get as much rest as possible," the woman explained, sitting in a nearby chair and getting rid of a crick in her neck. "He barely reacts as he wakes up, and shows no sign of recognition at all as he wakes."

"Not even for a moment?" Lenalee murmured questioningly, looking up at Matron sadly. The nurse shook her head.

For a while the both of them were silent, then a sudden loud snore from Medic made them chuckle quietly, smiling.

"What do you think of her?" Matron asked curiously, observing the sleeping brunette with a smile.

"I haven't seen very much of her, to be honest," Lenalee replied truthfully. "But if she really did take care of Lavi when he was younger, and was there for him during his tougher moments, then I'm glad she's here again for him now. But I would –"

The sudden opening of the infirmary door cut Lenalee short. It was, of all people, Lvellie. The raven haired girl bristled, standing up and moving in front of Lavi slightly, eyes hard. Lvellie stopped a little way before Lavi's bed, observing the sleeping Exorcist with an apathetic expression.

"Are you doing all in your power to bring him back?" Lvellie demanded, turning towards Matron with a glint in his eyes. Matron nodded, trying not to show any anger in her features. "Good. Because we cannot deal with useless Exorcists, especially when they have valuable information that we need."

Talking about Lavi as if he was simply weapon made Lenalee clench her fists; the teen said nothing though, knowing that she should bite her tongue.

"We will do what we can, Inspector," Matron said curtly.

"You better. Now, you are needed downstairs, Lenalee," Lvellie stated, pointing a finger at Lenalee with a slight smirk.

Frowning, not knowing why she would be needed downstairs, Lenalee smiled as Matron gave her a parting wave, heading out of the room after Lvellie.

"Bye, Lavi..."

Lenalee had said this everytime she left the infirmary, though she doubted the red head could hear her; she had seen people do it with coma patients, since it was believed they could still be aware of their surroundings despite their condition.

"Why are you bothering?" Lvellie said with a snort, giving her a contemptuous look. "He can't hear you."

Lenalee didn't reply.

As the pair of them made their way down the stairs, passing people by in silence, they eventually reached one of the main halls. It was filled with people, and Lenalee's heart soared when she saw Allen standing beside Komui. He still had a sealed left arm, but he was free apart from that.

Well, many CROW surrounded him as well, but it sure as hell was better than him being in a cell.

Standing beside Krory and Miranda, smiling at the both of them, Lenalee turned to face her brother, giving Allen a warm smile which was returned gladly by the white haired teen.

"You're all gathered here because we are know instigating a new battle plan against the Earl," Komui explained, lightly pushing his glasses back up to the bridge of his nose. "Most of you know of the poems, and they are the reason why we are changing our tactics."

"What's going to happen now then?" Krory asked curiously. "Are we going to look for more of them?"

"We are," Komui answered, nodding. "Bookman and Lavi found out about several locations where the next poems could be. Starting from today, by using the power of the Ark, we are going to send as many Exorcists and Finders out to these locations to find them."

Trying not to grin, Lenalee suddenly understood why Allen was there; Central needed him to find the Heart, so they had no choice but to release him.

"How many more poems are there?" Chaoji asked, frowning a little as he fiddled with the bandages around his arms. Komui shrugged.

"We don't really know. Bookman guesses that there might be 5 more, but there seem to be clues as well as poems, so..."

"Where is Bookman?" Miranda asked quietly, having noticed the missing presence of the old man amongst the rest of the Exorcists and Finders.

"He has gone to sort out things with his Clan, considering the events of..." Komui answered, faltering towards the end of his sentence.

Everyone fell silent at that, and Allen looked noticeably more miserable as he stood there beside the Chief of the Black Order.

"When do we leave?" Kanda asked, breaking the silence with his usual bluntness. Komui would have laughed if the Inspector hadn't been there.

"You all need to be put into groups and briefed, so you won't be leaving until tomorrow," the Chief answered, crossing his arms. "These locations are pretty much world-wide, so it will take a while to brief you all."

"And how close can Allen bring us to the different locations?" Krory asked, placing his hands on his hips. "Will some of us have to travel far in order to reach these places?"

"I've gotten quite near to most of the locations," Allen answered, giving the Romanian man a smile. "You all shouldn't have far to travel."

"Can we trust him though?" Chaoji demanded, directing his question towards Komui, regardless of Allen being right there as well. "What if he ends up -"

"I would rather die than betray any of you, even if you don't believe what I tell you."

Chaoji froze, feeling a little bit guilty by Allen's sincere answer and the soft smile on the teen's lips. To say something so hurtful, and for the teen to not even show any sign of pain or anger...

"Measures are being taken to keep you all safe," Komui stated quietly, closing his eyes. "Now that that's been cleared up, you can all go."

And, with that, the group of people all left except the Exorcists. Well, Chaoji left as well.

"It's nice to see you, Allen," Lenalee murmured, running up to the white haired teen and hugging him tightly. Allen laughed a little and patted her back with his free hand.

"To you as well," he replied, pulling away from her and smiling warmly. Komui resisted the urge to grab a drill and cause Allen bodily harm.

"You don't need to stay, you know," Komui called, giving the Exorcists a grin. "Plus, I think Allen needs to go be somewhere right now."

"Huh?"

With a gesture, the CROW members left so that the room was finally empty; no-one had noticed that Lvellie had left along with the main group. Komui smiled.

"I've been assigned to keep an eye on you," the man said cheerfully, eyes glinting happily. "And you haven't seen Lavi yet, hmm?"

Allen blinked at that, surprised. Then, looking down at his feet and smiling softly, the teen nodded.

"I'd like that..."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Medic sat in silence, staring up at the ceiling above her in quiet thought, expression morose. She had a gut feeling that something bad was going to happen, but she shoved the feeling away, ignoring it persistently.

The sound of the door opening made the brunette sit up, startled out of her reverie. When she saw who it was, Medic jumped up and ran towards the door.

"ALLEN-CHAN!"

The poor teen could scarcely breathe as the brunette Bookman Clan member practically suffocated him with a back-breaking hug. When Medic deemed Allen asphyxiated enough, she let him down.

"I knew they'd let you out eventually!" she called chirpily, grinning and placing her hands on her hips. "Are they still gonna be bastards and tail you everywhere?"

"In a way, yes."

A voice foreign to Medic said this, and the brunette blinked as she noticed Komui standing behind Allen, smiling warmly. Medic smiled in reply, nodding her head respectively; she recognised him now, knowing he was the Chief of the Black Order.

"_Hajimemashite_," Medic said politely, bowing. "Are you Komui-_shuchou_?"

"Haha, no need for the formalities," Komui replied, chuckling. "But yes, I am Chief Komui. You are Medic, yes?"

As Medic and Komui talked, neither of them noticed that Allen had started walking forwards slowly, eyes frozen on Lavi's sleeping form. The white haired teen stumbled slightly because of his seals, and ended up half collapsed by Lavi's bedside.

Raising his free right hand, Allen lifted himself up and knelt beside Lavi's bed, looking up at the red head's sleeping figure with a pained expression.

"I'm so sorry, Lavi..."

The teen's voice broke as he said this, alerting both Komui and Medic to where Allen was. Medic started to walk towards the teen, but Komui stopped her. The brunette frowned at the man, but he simply shook his head and bade her step outside with him.

Allen scarcely noticed the sound of the infirmary door closing.

Reaching forward and clasping one of Lavi's hands, Allen pulled the hand gently to one of his cheeks, leaning into the touch though Lavi's hand was cold. Allen closed his eyes.

"Please come back."

His voice was so quiet and subdued that he scarcely registered that he had even spoken. Allen opened his eyes slowly, searching Lavi's peaceful expression for some form of recognition of life.

He found nothing.

It broke Allen's heart to see Lavi so still and silent; he missed the red head's obsession with physical contact, and his loud raucous laughter. He missed the way Lavi would go from teasing him to comforting him with a warm smile and pat on the shoulder. He missed the way his name was spoken during their more private moments, the way Lavi's eye lit up whenever Allen entered the room.

He missed everything.

Fighting back tears, because he had to try and be strong for both Lavi and himself, Allen stood up and kissed Lavi's hand gently, interlacing his fingers with the red head's afterwards and sitting down in a nearby chair.

Allen had no idea when he fell asleep, nor that Komui and Medic came in soon after he had drifted off, and how they had smiled at him and Lavi holding hands.

The peaceful expression on both teen's faces brought happiness to Medic and Komui's hearts.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Cafeteria of Bookman Headquarters was deserted as Bookman sat down with a mug of green tea, the steam rising from the pale liquid soothing his taut nerves and the anger still simmering within him.

The Council had been very harsh with him.

In fact, Bookman was unsure what on Earth he would do, considering their punishment. But, knowing how extremely lenient they had been with him over the years, Bookman was on the other hand not at all surprised.

He and Lavi were being banished.

It had never happened, not even once during the Clan's extensive history. There had been Erasures of lesser Clan members, and threats of banishing maybe one slightly young and rebellious Bookman in the past.

But Bookman had provided them with over 50 years worth of history, and that wasn't even including the history he had helped to document with his master when he was younger. He had always been impartial with his documentations, and had risked his life on countless occasions in order to obtain certain parts of the hidden history.

Though, on the other hand, Bookman had disappointed the Clan with both of his apprentices, and had lost them important connections with the Noah Clan. He had now ended up risking the Headquarters by mixing the Black Order with the Clan, and had pushed his boundaries too far.

He was suffering for his mistakes, like always.

Bookman finished his tea with a sigh, noticing the Guardians standing nearby, ready to fully banish him from the Clan of the Bookmen. They would be unable to banish Lavi until he was awake, and Bookman doubted they would want to in the end.

Bookman would remember enough to be able to sort his apprentice out.

"It's time," one of the Guardians muttered, still showing respect to Bookman despite the situation by bowing his head and moving to the side politely. Bookman stood up calmly, taking his mug to a nearby trolley. The sound of the ceramic mug hitting the steel trolley was piercing amongst the dead silence around them.

"Follow me," the same Guardian requested, gesturing with a hand. Bookman snorted contemptuously and walked past him.

"I know my own way around here, brat. You could at least give me that courtesy."

And, with that, the old man headed out of the Cafeteria, showing some pride before he was degraded and left with nothing but his memories and regrets.

He didn't even remember his real name.

The passageways to the lowest levels of the Clan building were lit solely by candles, the small flickering flames shedding a deep hellish glow in the stone corridors. Bookman walked, without fear, towards the hall where Erasures took place.

Bookman had hoped that he'd die respectfully like his master, dying of old age whilst recording some war or another. He'd hoped he could pass the mantle onto Lavi, and know that his apprentice would carry the title of Bookman proudly and make up for his past by continuing after Bookman's footsteps.

Sometimes, things just didn't turn out like they should.

When Bookman finally reached the giant cavernous hall, the sound of the double oak doors creaking making a shudder fly down his spine, he noticed the entire council standing before a single torch, a bucket full of oil standing beside it.

"It is time, Bookman," Clan Head murmured, showing no emotion as he beckoned Bookman to stand before him on a series of circular seals; Bookman could feel the magic beneath his feet, and knew what was coming.

"Do you accept your fate?" Guardian Head demanded, looking tetchy. If he expected Bookman to make a commotion, he certainly thought the old man was several decades younger than he was.

Even with Innocence, Bookman would be unable to make a stand, no matter how good it would feel.

"I have accepted this path," was all the old man said in reply.

His brother simply sighed, looking only the slightest bit regretful as he made Bookman kneel before the torch, his sunken eyes devoid of emotion for the most part.

"Bookman, I hereby banish you from the Clan of the Bookmen," Clan Head stated, placing a hand on Bookman's head with a calm countenance. "You will henceforth be Erased, and you and your apprentice will never be allowed to step forth within this building again."

With hands that showed the tremble of old age, Clan Head slid his hands into the bucket of oil, drenching them. Then he covered Bookman's hair with the oil, making sure the oil didn't get on his brother's face or clothes.

He didn't want to kill him, after all.

When he had finished, Clan Head poured the rest of the bucket slowly around Bookman in a circle, following the design of the seals below them on the cold stone floor. The smell of the thick flammable substance made Bookman's eyes sting, and a slight bit of moisture made a single line of paint from the circles around his eyes slide down his cheek.

The sound of the torch being lifted up from its holder seemed louder than the strike of metal clashing.

The flames flickered wildly, already responding to the oil surrounding the nearby area. Bookman closed his eyes, preparing himself.

"With these flames, the spells connecting you to this Clan will be destroyed."

Clan Head tilted the torch, igniting the tips of Bookman's hair.

"_Z__à__iji__à__n, d__ìdì_..."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Darkness. Pure, impenetrable, pitch-black darkness. It surrounded Lavi on all sides. It wasn't disconcerting; he had been in this darkness all his life, forever asking himself the question Motoki had asked of him that fated day, blood dripping from Motoki's fingers as he dragged them down the right side of Lavi's face before he died.

_Who are 'you'?_

"The one who will succeed the Bookman."

Lavi's voice was cold and emotionless, sounding detached to his ears. The disembodied voice questioning him surrounded him on all sides, like always; an inescapable interrogator, merciless and unwilling to let go.

_Who is the Bookman?_

"The Bookman is a spectator to history, and its chronicler. He records the secret history of the world and passes it on to future generations."

_What must a Bookman be like?_

"He must not become attached or be controlled by emotion. He speaks with all kinds of people, then leaves as if nothing has happened."

_I will ask 'you' this once. Who are 'you'?_

The voice sounded irritated now, sounding more demanding as it asked Lavi this question. The red head clenched his fists.

"The Bookman's successor. I take on a new name each time I go somewhere new, and discard it each time I leave. Right now I'm also an Exorcist of the Black Order. My current name is Lavi."

_No - who are '__you'__?_

"I'm the Bookman successor. All I do is behold history with the eyes of an impartial observer and copy it down. Interfering with the actors is out of the question. I am the Bookman successor, belonging nowhere, my heart unmoved..."

A growing frustration was building within Lavi, like a cold fire in the pit of his stomach. Why couldn't the voice leave him alone? He had no concept of who he was, even at the age of 19.

_Then why does your heart belong to another?_

This question made Lavi freeze, his heart seeming to stop.

"It doesn't be-"

'_You' cannot be a Bookman. 'You' never could be a Bookman._

"I can change! I can still be Gramps' successo-"

'_You' don't want to change._

Lavi fell silent, nails piercing the skin of his palms as he clenched his fists even tighter, shaking slightly.

'_You' are not an Exorcist._

"Stop."

'_You' are not a Bookman._

"Stop."

'_You' are not 'Lavi'._

"Stop!"

'_You' are nothing._

"STOP!"

Lavi's cry made his throat hurt, making his voice break a little as he shouted. He fell to his knees, drops of blood dripping down from his fists.

'_You' belong nowhere. 'You' exist nowhere. 'Your' heart cannot belong to another._

"Please stop..."

Lavi sounded broken now, voice quiet as he fought back tears.

'_You' are a lie; a lie that should be erased without anyone remembering 'you'._

The sound of footsteps made the red head look upwards. He saw booted feet, tight trousers clad to thin legs. He saw a green poncho, made of wool and stained with old blood. He saw bloodstained hands, ruby red liquid dripping into the darkness. He saw a pale face and a single cold emotionless eye, wide and empty of anything at all.

It was the side of himself that he hated to see; Bookman Junior.

'_You' should not exist. 'You' should have been erased long ago, back when you started malfunctioning._

Lavi did not reply.

'_You' are a disgrace to the Bookman Clan. No wonder Bookman is forever disappointed in 'you'._

Lavi did not reply.

'_You' will be left alone in this world, unloved and unwanted._

Lavi did not reply.

_Allen has fallen in love with a lie._

"... No..."

'_You' will break his heart._

"No!"

Lavi stood up, gripping Bookman Junior's shoulders tightly, eye wild.

"He hasn't! I won't!"

'_You' don't really exist; 'Lavi' is a lie to make people trust 'you'. Allen doesn't love the real 'you'. He could __never__ love the real 'you'._

Lavi froze, heart twisting painfully in his chest.

_The one person who needed someone reliable, someone to always be there for him; a constant, when everyone else has always left him - and you decide to make him open up to '__you'__._

"I-I don't..."

_Allen will break, and it will be because of 'you'!_

Lavi fell to his knees, tears sliding down his face and dripping onto his white trousers. A lump formed in his throat, making him choke on his sobs as he rested his head on his legs, hair hiding his face. Bookman Junior did nothing, eye cold.

'_You' hurt everything you touch; mother, Motoki, Allen, even Bookman. 'You' can never be anything more than a shadow, flitting from place to place._

Lavi's heart was breaking.

_So there is no point to 'your' existence._

And, with that, Bookman Junior gripped Lavi's head and shoved him down into the darkness, never to be found again.

'Lavi' was gone.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- hajimemashite = nice to meet you (Japanese)

- shuchou = chief (Japanese)

- Zàijiàn, dìdì = Goodbye, little brother (mandarin chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**... Don't kill me... *flees* I swear, I hurt Lavi way too much considering he's my favourite character ^^" But, meh... Makes for good plot ;)**

**Don't despair though! There is a light at the end of the tunnel! ... It's just not here yet :L**

**By the way, quite a bit of the initial speech in the last scene is taken from a translation of The 49****th**** Name, Lavi's Reverse story. It's heartbreaking ;_; So credit to Kumori/kkamagwi on ljournal for translating it ~**

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter, please review, and look forward to the next one!**

**xrowa-chanx**


	17. Chapter 15: An Arms Race

**Hey guys ~ Sorry for the late update - I've been really busy lately, and I've had a few oneshots that I really had to get done XD And I'm sorry everything is so confusing at the moment - things will get cleared up over time, I promise :3**

**Btw, I'm going on holiday in a few days - so I won't be updating for a while. Sorry ^^"**

**And the lemon for Kimura Yumi is written, for those who care - it's been a while since I wrote smut, and I've never written Laven before so... you're gonna have to give me as much criticism as possible :L XD It's up on the ****Archives Of Our Own**** website - it's called ****Half Full, Half Empty****. Check it out ;D**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice._

_It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved._

Jeremy Kitson

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 15 - An Arm's Race

As another day dawned over the Black Order, yet another day passed where Lavi had not awoken. It had been nearly a week now, and the teen had shown no signs of escaping his mental prison; he was just as unresponsive as he had been a week prior.

Matron had done all in her power to rouse Lavi; adrenaline shots, various types of medicine and herbal remedies, pain. Nothing would bring the red head back, and Matron was beginning to worry.

Medic had told her that Lavi had been in a catatonic state for 2 months when he was a child, but Matron knew for certain that being like that for so long had disastrous consequences on the psyche.

She knew that Lavi might be destroying himself more and more mentally as time passed.

Matron had hoped that Allen's continuous presence might have helped Lavi come back but, no matter how many times Allen sat by the apprentice Bookman's bedside and begged him to come back, the red head did not stir and continued to stare blankly at the wall on the other side of the room.

It wasn't helping Allen any, since he still had no clue whether he had put Lavi in such a state of mind. He needed to be comforted by Lavi and told the truth of the incident that had left him catatonic and Link dead.

That wasn't going to happen anytime soon, however.

"Allen, I need you in my office now."

Standing in the doorway of the infirmary was Komui, one hand pressed against the doorframe as he observed the depressed-looking teen before him with sad eyes. Allen looked towards him, and nodded, not even attempting to fake a smile.

Getting up slowly, giving Lavi one last longing look before leaving his bedside, Allen walked towards Komui and followed him out of the room. Matron waved at the two of them and called a goodbye, but neither replied.

The corridors were quiet, since it was quite early in the morning. A few Finders and members of the Science Department were up and about, holding files and various folders as they headed to their destinations. Most of them stayed well clear of Allen, distrusting the teen after the events a week previously.

Allen stopped noticing after his second day out of the cell.

It pained Komui to see the members of the Order act so distrustfully towards Allen, and the white haired teen's blank and somewhat morose expression worried Komui.

Lavi had to wake up soon; not just for his sake, but Allen's too.

"Ah, coffee!"

As Komui entered his office and noticed the fresh mug of black coffee on his extremely messy desk, he practically skipped across the paper-covered floor and grabbed the mug, sipping from it with a satisfied smile.

Allen sighed and shook his head slightly, making his way to the couch in front of Komui's desk and sitting down.

"Are there still more people to brief, Komui?" Allen asked, leaning back and resting against the plump cushions behind him. "I thought we did all of them yesterday."

"We still have two more to do today," Komui replied, shaking his head. "We're sending Lenalee in a team to Sweden, and Kanda in a team to Norway. I thought I'd brief them together since they're heading to a similar area of the world."

"Okay... It's Bergen and Götaland, right?" Allen stated with a contemplative frown, sitting up. Komui nodded.

Just then, the door to Komui's office opened. In stepped Lenalee and Kanda, both looking tired yet awake. Behind them were Chaoji and Miranda.

"Ah, good morning!" Komui called, giving Kanda an evil venomous glare before giving Lenalee a sweet smile. Allen rolled his eyes.

"Morning _ge-ge_," Lenalee replied, returning the smile and ignoring the looks her brother was giving Kanda altogether. "Are we being briefed now then?"

Komui nodded, beckoning the four of them to sit down beside Allen on the couch before him. Lenalee and Kanda sat either side of Allen, with Miranda sitting next to Kanda with a somewhat nervous disposition. Chaoji chose to stand, glaring at Allen with narrowed eyes.

"I am sending the four of you, along with a number of Finders, to Scandinavia to try and find the next poem or clue," Komui explained, taking another sip from his coffee before holding it in his hands to warm them. "Lenalee and Chaoji will be going to the south of Sweden, known locally as Götaland, and Kanda and Miranda will be going to Bergen, in the west of Norway."

"How close can you bring us Allen?" Lenalee asked, turning to the white haired teen beside her.

"I can make a gate to Oslo, and a gate to Stockholm," Allen answered with a smile, though it didn't really look genuine. Lenalee ignored this, and returned the 'smile'.

"It shouldn't take long for you to travel to your respective locations," Komui added. He then turned towards Lenalee and Chaoji. "However, due to how large Götaland is, we will be sending quite a few Finders with the two of you. They've already been sent so that they can meet you upon your arrival."

The two of them nodded.

"Right, now that that's all clear, you should go get something to eat then meet us in the Main Hall for departure," Komui murmured, standing up as he finished his cup of coffee. Kanda, Lenalee, Miranda and Chaoji left the room, all heading to the Cafeteria to eat. Allen stayed where he was, playing with the hem of his shirt with his free hand with a blank expression. Komui sighed.

"You should go get something to eat too, Allen."

"Not hungry."

"You haven't eaten since yesterday morning."

"... Not hungry."

"Have you slept either?"

Allen didn't answer this question, but the bags under the teen's eyes and the exhaustion evident in his face answered Komui's question for him.

"You can't keep doing this to yourself," Komui murmured quietly, placing two hands on either of Allen's shoulders. The teen did not meet the man's eye, staring down at his lap.

"I know..." was all Allen said in reply before turning completely silent, tone dead-sounding and emotionless. Komui gritted his teeth.

"You're free to go."

With that, Komui let go of Allen's shoulders, watching him leave with a pained expression. He had to follow eventually, having replaced Link for the time being as Allen's 'watchdog'. But, in a way, he wished he could leave Allen be for a while - seeing the usually smiling teen look so depressed and down was bringing Komui down too.

"... I need another cup of coffee..."

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

The Main Hall was quite busy by the time the four Exorcists entered it; a mission had just ended, and quite a few Finders were queuing up for food.

"This is going to take a while..." Chaoji mumbled, scowling a little. "We should really head out soon."

Lenalee and Miranda nodded in agreement, whilst Kanda simply huffed and ignored the three of them.

Half an hour later, the four of them were finally able to order the food that they wanted, and could sit down and eat. Komui and Allen walked into the Cafeteria soon after they started, but the two of them politely waited for them to finish before calling them away to the Gate Hall.

The walk through the corridors was awkwardly silent, Chaoji maintaining a wide distance from Allen, eyeing the white haired teen suspiciously. Allen didn't even notice, simply staring ahead with blank silver eyes.

Lenalee and Miranda both gave the teen a worried look, but said nothing, not wanting to get involved in something that was not their business.

By the time they reached the Gate Hall, with numerous white pillars of light scattered across the room, people entering and leaving through them, the six of them reached two empty spots labelled Sweden and Norway.

"Ready, Allen?" Komui asked, turning towards the white haired teen with a smile. Allen nodded.

Singing the 14th's Lullaby in his head, finding a little solace in the bittersweet melody, Allen created both the gates one after the other, creating the gate to Sweden first.

Lenalee bid her brother goodbye, giving him a tight hug and smiling when he bid her to be careful on her mission. Chaoji gave his comrades a nervous smile before following Lenalee through the gate.

Kanda didn't even look in Komui or Allen's direction as he walked through his gate, not checking to see if Miranda was following him.

"A-ah, wait Kanda!" Miranda cried, reaching out for the raven haired teen as he disappeared through the white pillar. The brunette turned towards Allen and gave the teen a smile. "Take care, Allen."

Patting him on the shoulder gently before leaving through the gate, Miranda gave Allen one last look before entering the Ark. When she next opened her eyes, all she saw was a plain wooden door.

"Hurry up."

Kanda was waiting a metre or two away, hand on one hip with a scowl on his face. Miranda gave the Japanese Exorcist a nervous smile before following him to the door that would take them to their destination.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

The carriage was quiet as Lenalee and Chaoji sat and stared out the window, watching the deep forests of southern Sweden rush by as the train took them to Gothenburg. It wasn't going to take very long; only 3 or 4 hours at best.

Upon crossing into Stockholm, the two of them were greeted by three Finders, who informed them that the rest of their group had set out for Gothenburg the day before. These Finders were also on the same train as Lenalee and Chaoji, but gave the Exorcists some privacy and sat in a different carriage.

The scenery outside was beautiful, with a mixture of rolling green hills and vast areas of forest. Lenalee saw a few deer near to the tracks as they slowed down at a station, though they soon darted off into the trees behind them.

She wondered what type of deer they were, for they didn't look like the ones she had encountered in England. In her head she suddenly pictured Lavi sitting beside her, explaining what breed the deer were, and where they originated from; the Bookman apprentice seemed to know everything.

As Lavi came to mind, Lenalee's gaze shifted from the view outside to her hands, which were clasped tightly in her lap. She closed her eyes and sighed, hoping that by the time she came back Lavi had made some progress.

She hoped that Allen would cheer up too.

Upon remembering how broken her friend looked, Lenalee flinched a little, not wanting to see Allen's fake smile in her mind; she hated those smiles, and she had started to realise how fake most of Allen's smiles were at times.

It worried her.

There were times when Allen seemed to radiate hope and optimism, putting smiles on everyone's faces with his gentlemanly countenance and polite remarks. His eating habits and near constant arguments with Kanda also brightened up everyone's day.

He was the light amongst the darkness of the war for Lenalee, and to see Her Light so broken down and depressed made her feel anxious, her desire to try and help her friend get back on his feet increasing day by day.

Allen had helped her so much, so the least Lenalee could do was be there for him in turn.

"Miss Lenalee?"

Lenalee was startled out of her reverie by Chaoji's somewhat timid voice. Looking up and meeting Chaoji's eyes, she noted the nervousness in them and wondered what he wanted to speak to her about.

"Yes, Chaoji?" Lenalee asked, tilting her head a little. "Are you alright?"

The teen fell silent, looking to the side awkwardly. Then, eventually meeting her gaze once more, he leant towards Lenalee a little and sighed.

"Can we really trust Allen?"

"Of course we can."

Lenalee answered immediately, with no hesitation in her voice whatsoever; it baffled Chaoji.

"But can we really?" he retorted, scowling. "Do you really believe him to be innocent after what happened to Inspector Link?"

"Completely," Lenalee replied, narrowing her eyes. "Allen is my comrade and friend, and he would never betray us, kill Link, or hurt Lavi either. I know he wouldn't."

"But what if he's changed? What if he isn't the same 'Allen' anymore?" Chaoji demanded, clenching his fists. "Will you still blindly follow him, even if he's different?"

"I will follow him until the end."

Chaoji faltered at that, sitting back in his seat and avoiding Lenalee's gaze, which held so much faith and determination that Chaoji couldn't bear to look at her.

He couldn't help but distrust Allen. Ever since Noah's Ark, when Allen tried to save Tyki when they were about to leave, Chaoji couldn't shake off the fear that Allen was going to betray them.

He had dreamt of Allen losing to the 14th and slaughtering the members of the Order, Crown Clown dripping with ruby red blood as the teen's usually white hair became more and more mottled with red.

Chaoji didn't really know why he had questioned Lenalee's trust in Allen; out of everyone, she was closest to him and knew him better than Chaoji did, in all likelihood. But his thoughts and worries about Allen had been spiralling inside of him as he sat and watched the Swedish countryside pass by, and he couldn't help but crave acknowledgement.

Chaoji wanted someone to feel the same fears that he did. But Lenalee didn't; the girl was steadfast in her belief in Allen, and nothing Chaoji could say would break it.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The infirmary was deathly silent as Allen sat by Lavi's bedside, his eyes devoid of emotion as he clasped one of Lavi's cold hands in his, gaze fixated on the red head's blank stare. Allen had been like this for hours, and both Matron and Medic were extremely worried about him.

Medic was worried about something else too though.

"Bookman still isn't back..." Medic murmured, placing the clean equipment that she had been sterilising for Matron to one side. "And they're probably wondering where I've gone too."

"He will be back eventually," Matron replied, giving the brunette woman a comforting smile. "I doubt he would want to be apart from his apprentice for all that long."

Medic said nothing in reply, simply sighing and returning to her work. Allen barely reacted to their entire conversation, only tilting his head a little before returning to staring at Lavi. He clasped the red headed teen's hands tighter, fighting back the urge to fall asleep. Allen's nights were plagued with nightmares, Link's dead corpse and Lavi's blood-covered and catatonic form haunting him until he woke, screaming and fighting back tears.

So Allen decided not to sleep at all.

He knew he couldn't keep it up forever, and he also knew that Lavi was going to give him an earful when he found out about how he had been acting.

A small voice in the corner of Allen's mind wondered if Lavi was ever going to wake up, to which Allen shut out said voice in reply, gritting his teeth.

If it was his fault that Lavi was like this, then this was his penance for hurting the one he had fallen in love with.

The sound of the infirmary door opening made Allen turn his head, albeit slowly and with much disinterest. When he saw who was standing in the doorway, he let go of Lavi's hand, standing up instantly with a shocked expression.

"B-Bookman? !"

Both Medic and Matron started at that, looking upwards sharply at Allen's startled cry. Medic dropped the scissors in her hand, making ethanol spill all over her uniform.

"Why do you look so shocked? I haven't died, you fools."

Bookman stood in the doorway, looking tired but somewhat peaceful. He was wearing his Exorcist uniform, and had his hands tucked inside of the sleeves of his long jacket.

All of his hair was gone. Completely and utterly gone.

The old man's scalp was hairless, with three large rectangular tattoos marring his skin. They increased in size, with the smallest one being just above his forehead, and the largest covering almost all of the back of his head.

The black circles that Bookman usually had around his eyes were gone, and the old man looked more human without the dark imprints around them.

Both Allen and Matron had no idea what had happened to Bookman, but Medic did. Feeling tears building up in her eyes, the brunette ran towards Bookman and hugged him tightly, ignoring all past experiences of him shoving her away when she tried to hug him.

"Why? ! Why would they Erase you?" Medic sobbed, digging her fingers into Bookman's jacket tightly. "I don't understand..."

Bookman pushed the woman away, looking a little disgruntled at the tears staining his shoulder. Medic sniffed, her expression broken and distraught.

"I don't understand..." Matron murmured, frowning. "What does 'Erase' mean?"

"When the Bookman Clan wish to banish one of their members and sever their connection to the Clan, they are Erased," Bookman explained, voice apathetic as he found a chair to sit down in. "When I first became a member of the Clan, I had spells placed upon me that connected me to the Clan. Now that I have been banished, these spells have been destroyed."

"B-banished?" Allen echoed, clenching his fists with wide eyes. "What... what does that mean for you? Has Lavi been banished too?"

"We both are no longer members of the Bookman Clan," Bookman replied with a sigh, closing his eyes tiredly. "The rules we followed, and the constraints we put ourselves under, have been annulled."

For a while the room was silent. Then, it dawned on Allen what that truly meant.

"So... Lavi doesn't have to keep making personas anymore?"

The white haired teen sounded hopeful, and Bookman did not stop himself from smiling a little; he was allowed to now, after all.

"Yes. And I can now choose to find a name for myself, and remain that way for the rest of my days."

Allen gave the old man a genuine smile as those words were spoken, sitting down and looking somewhat less lost from before. He missed, however, the sadness present in Bookman's eyes.

"I'd go get some rest, Bookman," Matron said with a smile, noticing how tired the old man looked. "I will bring you up to date with Lavi's present state afterwards."

Simply nodding in reply, Bookman left the room. As soon as he left, Medic allowed herself to truly cry, falling to her knees and sobbing. Allen and Matron both made their way beside her, looking concerned.

"What's wrong?" Matron asked, placing a hand on the brunette woman's shoulder. Medic clenched her fists tightly, tears falling down onto her clothes with soft patters.

"Being a Bookman was his life... Now... Now he has nothing at all. Nothing but regrets."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Miranda had never seen such beautiful mountains in her entire life.

The peaks were tipped with snow, and the sky was a pure cerulean blue. The train swerved this way and that on the carefully maintained tracks, circumnavigating mountain upon mountain as they made their way to Bergen.

The mountain plateau was called Hardangervidda, according to one of the staff at the station in Oslo. She had also told them that the journey would take somewhere between 7 to 8 hours, much to Kanda's annoyance.

The raven haired teen had spent the entire journey up until that point completely silent, ignoring Miranda completely as he stared out the window. Miranda, not wanting to aggravate him, simply watched the sights outside, feeling a sense of awe build at how beautiful it all was.

When they entered a huge valley, with large outcrops of rock and ice on either side of the train, Miranda leant forward to look out of the window more clearly, eyes wide. As she did so, her butterfly necklace dangled forwards, catching the light of the sun beautifully.

Kanda saw a twinkle out of the corner of his eye, and he turned to look at the necklace, a sombre emotion entering his usually dark eyes. Miranda seemed to notice the change in atmosphere and, when she noticed Kanda's intense stare, the brunette gave a little squeak and sat back down, tucking the necklace back inside of her jacket.

"S-sorry, Kanda..." she stammered apologetically, giving the teen a nervous smile.

Kanda didn't reply, averting his eyes and looking to one side. Knowing that he was thinking of Marie, which made her heart twist painfully in her chest, Miranda sat back down and held the jewelled metal butterfly in her hands gently, looking down and smiling sadly.

"Do you think he's somewhere peaceful right now?" Miranda murmured, stroking the butterfly's wings with a thumb.

Kanda didn't reply for a long time, moving one of his hands to thumb the stigmata under his clothing without realising. Eventually, when Miranda began to prepare herself for another 4 hours of complete silence, Kanda huffed a little.

"Much more peaceful than here, probably," Kanda muttered, crossing his arms. "Stupid bastard, leaving me with that buffoon Chaoji and Tiedoll-sensei..."

Miranda knew that Kanda was trying to hide his sadness towards Marie's death behind his usual rude countenance so, instead of criticising him on being so uncaring, Miranda smiled.

"Yeah, I'm sure it is..."

The next few hours were spent in a slightly tense, but not awkward, silence. The mountains of Eastern Norway passed them by and, soon enough, Kanda and Miranda found themselves standing on a frozen and bitterly cold platform, an ice covered sign indicating that they were at Bergen Station swinging creakily above their heads.

"Where are we heading from here?" Miranda asked, sounding subdued as a strong gust of wind made her hair blow in front of her face. "Are we waiting for the Finders?"

"Che, like hell we are," Kanda muttered, tone dark. "We're finding somewhere warm to stay, before we freeze our asses off."

And, as simple as that, Kanda picked up his suitcase and stormed out of the station with a permanent glare staining his features. Apologising to passer-bys, who were eyeing Kanda fearfully, Miranda kept up with the raven haired Exorcist as best as she could.

Luckily, virtually no-one was out on the streets, so she couldn't lose Kanda as such. However, the twisting nature of the frozen streets made him disappear from view from time-to-time, making Miranda panic and run forwards.

The poor brunette tripped often on the cobbled stones before her, earning herself a large bruise on her forehead, and a few cuts on her hands and knees. Being so eager to not lose Kanda, Miranda increased her pace, practically running down the street. She was so preoccupied with keeping up that she walked straight into Kanda, who had stopped dead before an old looking monastery.

"A-ah! I'm so sorry, Kanda!" Miranda cried, bowing her head apologetically as she eyed the raven haired teen's dark look fearfully. It was only when Kanda winced and grabbed his right arm tightly that Miranda realised the look wasn't directed at her.

"... Kanda?"

The teen didn't reply, eyes narrowing. His stigmata were throbbing painfully, sending sharp waves of stabbing pains up his arms, making his fingers twitch. Not understanding why, since he had never experienced such a reaction before, Kanda looked up at the monastery before them and gritted his teeth.

Walking forwards and rapping on the large wooden doors with his knuckles, Kanda tapped his foot impatiently as he waited for a reply. Miranda followed him and stood behind him as he waited, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear nervously.

The door eventually opened to an old man, dressed in the typical dark robes of a monk, his eyes hidden by the wrinkles adorning his old withered face.

"Hello! Are you looking for some shelter for the night?" the man asked, giving the both of them a kind smile.

"If that's alright with you," Miranda murmured quietly in reply, shooting sidelong glances at Kanda with a worried expression; the teen looked tense, and the grip on his arm was so tight that Miranda worried he was going to break his own arm.

"Of course it's alright! I recognise your uniform; you are Exorcists, correct? Any Follower of God is welcome in this place of worship. Come."

With that, the monk led the two of them inside, shutting the heavy doors behind them. It was warm inside, and the glow of candles and firelight from a room down the hall was comforting compared to the cold grey bitterness outside.

"We've only got one other person staying with us at the moment," the old man explained, not noticing the look Kanda shot him as he said these words. "My wife is currently preparing dinner, so I'll inform her of your arrival. My name is Lukas, by the way."

"Nice to meet you..." Miranda managed to say in reply, looking more and more nervous as they made their way towards the orange glow at the end of the hallway. The walls were made of stone, and cold to the touch, giving everything a slightly Gothic touch. It was creeping Miranda out slightly, and her nerves were already frayed from running after Kanda and wondering why on Earth he was acting so tense.

When the three of them entered the room at the end of the hall, Lukas leading the way to a large wooden dinner table, Miranda noticed a man sitting at the far end of the table, the firelight glinting off of his rounded glasses. He had short curly hair, and she recognised the outfit that he was wearing, despite being reasonably new to the Black Order; the man was a high ranking official of the Church.

"Hello there, Cardinal!" Lukas called, smiling warmly at the bespectacled man. "We have two new arrivals staying with us now! Ah, I didn't get your names..."

"Kanda and Miranda Lotto," Kanda replied instantly, narrowing his eyes at the curly haired man at the end of the table. Kanda turned towards Lukas slightly, clenching his fists. "Cardinal, did you say?"

"Yes," Lukas replied, looking a little nervous under Kanda's jet black stare. "I do believe he works under the same people as you, am I correct? He mentioned Exorcists to me a little while ago. But do excuse me, I need to talk to my wife."

Looking uncomfortable in the tense atmosphere created by Kanda's intense staring and the Cardinal's somewhat creepy smile, Lukas left the three of them alone, leaving the room and heading down the corridor, his footsteps echoing on the stone slabs.

"I feel there's no need to waste time, hmm?" Cardinal said, continuing to smile. "I have been waiting for you. Not the two of you specifically, though you are certainly good enough for now."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kanda demanded, fingering the hilt of his sword.

Standing up, his chair screeching against the stone floor, Cardinal walked up to the two of them, making Kanda draw his weapon and raise it before him. Miranda also drew her Innocence, prepared to activate it if necessary. Cardinal stopped a metre or two before them and bowed.

"I am Apocryphos, the creator of the poems you have been finding. And now I shall take you to find the other ones. Pleased to make your acquaintance."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- ge-ge = older brother (mandarin Chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**I'm sorry this chapter was so shit =_= But now you know who wrote the poems, right? And do you guys remember me writing about the Cardinal being in Norway? This is why *smiles* And whenever I imagine a bald Bookman, I cannot stop giggling XDXD**

**I'll try and update as soon as I can after I come back from my holiday, so I hope you can wait until then. Sorry if things haven't been very good lately...**

**Much love,**

**xrowa-chanx**


	18. Chapter 16: Following The Stepping Stone

**Hey everyone! Sorry it's been a while, tried writing some of this chappie whilst on holiday but I didn't have much time to spare. I had so much fun though; went to Wales with my family :'3**

**Enjoy this chapter everyone!**

**[DISCLAIMER]: I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.**

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream._

Paulo Coelho; The Alchemist

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 16 - Following The Stepping Stones

The atmosphere in the monastery dining hall was thick as seaside fog, the tension almost tangible as Kanda and Miranda sat and ate their dinner with the Cardinal, Lukas the monk, and his wife.

At first, Lukas and his wife tried to make conversation. However, the discussions never lasted long and, soon enough, the whole room became awkwardly silent for the remainder of the meal.

"We should go and, umm, wash the dishes?" Lukas said tentatively, turning to his wife with a nervous smile. The old woman nodded, and the pair of them left the room.

"This is fantastic stew," the Cardinal commented, smiling as he devoured the remains of his food with relish.

Kanda ignored the Cardinal's statement, picking at his stew and wishing it was soba instead, whilst Miranda uttered a nervous giggle, nearly dropping her spoon into the bowl before her. The silence continued after that, becoming even more awkward and tense than the silence prior. It was suffocating and, soon enough, Kanda became sick and tired of it.

The sound of hands slamming onto the table split the silence like a gunshot.

"Alright, you fucking bastard," Kanda snapped, glaring viciously at the curly haired bespectacled man sitting at the other end of the table. "What are you here for, and why have you been waiting for us?"

For a minute or two, the Cardinal didn't answer, finishing his meal with a small smile still plastered on his face. Then, when Kanda was on the verge of shoving his spoon somewhere where the sun didn't shine, the Cardinal calmly pushed aside his bowl and turned towards the two Exorcists, still smiling.

"I have told you already, no?" the man said quietly, resting his head in the palm of one hand, his smile turning ever so slightly sinister. "I am the author of the poems you seek. I have been waiting for any Exorcist, not necessarily either of you."

"Why did you write the poems?" Kanda demanded, leaning forward slightly with his eyes still narrowed, gritting his teeth. "You want us to find the Heart, is that it?"

"Yes, I want you to find the Heart," the Cardinal replied, tone turning ever so slightly gentler, his eyes closing behind his rounded glasses. "I have been protecting the Heart for centuries, and now is the time for the Heart to be freed to end this war between humanity and the Millenium Earl."

"But why now? Why not years and years ago, when this all started?" Miranda asked quietly, finally finding her voice. The Cardinal shook his head and gave the brunette woman a small smile.

"The time was not right."

"… I don't understand…"

"I can't explain it to you now. I need to go back to your Order."

As the Cardinal said this he stood up slowly, meeting Kanda's gaze the entire time so as not to make the bad-tempered teen suspect him of foul play. He walked to the other side of the room and picked up a heavy black coat, the insignia of the Vatican imprinted clearly on the front of it.

"We do not have a lot of time," the man said quietly, putting his coat on and doing the buttons up swiftly. "How did you get here?"

"Why should we tell you?" Kanda asked with a scowl, getting up from his chair and making his way to the door, not wanting the Cardinal to suddenly leave.

"Because, without me, the Noah will find the other poems before you do," the Cardinal replied simply, tone sharpening slightly as he said this. "And we don't want that now, do we?"

Kanda said nothing for a while, gritting his teeth and clenching his fists tightly. Then, eventually, the raven haired teen sighed and nodded at Miranda, indicating that she should stand.

"We got here by using a train from Oslo," Kanda muttered. "I'm sure there'll be plenty you can tell us during the journey about everything."

And, with that, Kanda headed out of the door, dragging Miranda behind him. Chuckling, the Cardinal followed.

The bitter cold outside was of a stark contrast to the warmth of the monastery, and both Kanda and Miranda pulled their uniform tighter around themselves to try and preserve some heat. The Cardinal trudged straight past them into the snow, not waiting for the two Exorcists behind him. Muttering under his breath, Kanda grabbed hold of Miranda's arm and pulled her along behind him as he followed the Cardinal, looking murderous as they made their way back to the station.

When they eventually arrived, the attendants looking confused at seeing Kanda and Miranda back at the station so soon, the three of them boarded the train that was still waiting there from their arrival, due to arrive at Oslo some seven hours later. The snow was going to make the journey slower too.

Finding an empty carriage, Kanda and Miranda sat down on one side of a table, the Cardinal the other. As they sat down, something dawned on Miranda.

"Ah Kanda, what about the Finders?" Miranda exclaimed, looking worried as she stood up again. "They don't know that we're heading back already."

"Like I care," Kanda snapped, feeling tense in the presence of the bespectacled man before him. "When they realise we're gone, they can head back themselves. We're not their fucking mothers."

Miranda squeaked a little at that, sitting back down with a subdued expression. The Cardinal said nothing.

None of them said anything for quite a while, the seconds passing into minutes. When it eventually came to half an hour, the silence becoming even more tense than it had in the monastery dining room, the train shuddered to life.

Slowly gaining in speed, the snow settling on the tracks making their going slow, the train made its way from Bergen to Oslo, carrying a few passengers and quite a lot of cargo from the town it had just stopped at. Just as the train left the outskirts of Bergen behind, Kanda raised his head and looked directly at the Cardinal.

"You have a lot of things to answer for, you bastard. Now gimme some answers."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The sound of a faraway clock was the only thing that punctuated the silence of Komui's office, apart from his breathing and the faint sound of pen against paper. It was beginning to irritate him, and he soon wished that he had fallen asleep so Reever could come in, as always, and tell him off; anything would be better than the almost tangible silence that hung over him.

He had been very busy though, ever since he sent everyone away to search for more poems and clues. No-one had notified him so far of any successes, and Komui was very aware of the consequences if nothing was found, or if any more Exorcists died. So, to prevent himself from worrying too much about the people he had sent away, and Allen too, Komui set about writing and finishing the piles and piles of reports surrounding his desk.

When Johnny walked in, carrying a few scientific journals that had been sent from the Asia Branch, the poor man nearly dropped everything that he was holding upon seeing Komui actually working.

"Is something wrong, Johnny?" Komui asked, not looking up from the paper before him. Johnny blinked a few times before smiling slightly.

"I'm just happy to see you working, Chief."

"I'm always working! Why are you so mean to me?"

"Well, you may be working but… not on things that are really worth working over…"

Komui looked up at that, pouting childishly and scowling a little.

"If you're referring to my darling Komlins, then you should be careful what you say," Komui said quietly, the tiniest glint in his eyes making Johnny stop talking and give the man a nervous smile.

"W-well, I brought you some umm journals that Chief Bak Chan wanted to give to you," Johnny stammered in reply, stumbling a little as he placed the piles of paper on Komui's already overflowing desk. "He said that they were about that formula you were trying out about the Crystal Type data."

"Ah good good!" Komui cried delightfully, shoving the reports onto the floor as he eagerly reached for the journals. "Thank you, Johnny!"

"You're welcome, Chief!" Johnny replied, smiling.

The bespectacled scientist then started to leave the room, seeing that Komui was entirely absorbed by Bak's data. But, just as he reached the doorway, Johnny stopped and turned back towards Komui, fiddling with his coat nervously.

"Umm… Chief?"

Komui looked up at that, blinking a few times at the awkward, and somewhat embarrassed expression, on Johnny's face.

"What is it, Johnny?" Komui asked, cocking his head. Johnny looked down at his feet, cheeks flushed.

"Well, sir…"

"Yes?"

"I was, umm, w-wondering…"

"Yes?"

"If, well, it would be alright to…"

"YES?"

"."

"…"

"Y-you didn't hear me, did you…"

"No, Johnny. No I didn't."

Johnny sighed, looking truly embarrassed now as Komui gave him a serious look. Then, gathering up his courage, Johnny looked up and met Komui's gaze.

"Can I book some time off this weekend, please?"

Komui blinked. Then blinked some more. Then blinked some more again.

"Why on Earth do you need some free time?" Komui demanded, laughing a little; it was extremely strange for Johnny to ask for some time off, if he didn't want to sleep that is.

"Well, Chief, there's this girl that I wish to take out. F-for dinner, I mean. N-n-not for a-a-anyth-"

"A girl? For dinner?" Komui repeated incredulously, lowering his glasses a little. "Who?"

Johnny turned as red as a tomato, fiddling with the hems of the sleeves of his jacket.

"W-well, her name is Miss Lou Fa, Chief. I've been waiting for a quieter time, y-you know to…" Johnny replied, mumbling a little as he spoke.

Komui didn't say anything for a while, thinking deeply. He knew that when the groups he'd sent out came back, either with positive or negative results, the whole Order would be extremely busy as they processed the results. But, in the meantime…

"Well, you shouldn't really wait until the weekend, Johnny," Komui said commandingly, getting up from his chair and placing a hand around the younger man's shoulders. "Go tomorrow night, and I'll let you."

"Really ? !" Johnny cried, turning towards Komui with an incredulous expression. "I can go?"

"Only if you do overtime the next day, of course," Komui answered with a somewhat sadistic grin, his grip tightening on Johnny's shoulder. The bespectacled scientist nodded, albeit a bit fearfully.

"Of course, Chief. Thank you Chief!"

With that, Johnny left Komui's office and made his way down the corridor, beaming and smiling. He'd owed Lou Fa a date since Christmas, when they had accidentally met under the mistletoe. Now that he had obtained Komui's permission, Johnny made his way up to the infirmary.

He needed to look and act like a gentleman. And there was only one person who he knew was perfect for the job.

"Allen? Are you in here?"

Opening the infirmary tentatively, knocking before he opened the door, Johnny noticed that the room was empty apart from Allen and Lavi, who was still lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. Allen looked like he was half-asleep, one hand clasping one of Lavi's tightly, and the other resting under his head.

Upon hearing Johnny, Allen turned towards the doorway, giving Johnny the smallest of smiles; Johnny had barely been able to see Allen since he was let out of his cell, so to see Allen look so down and depressed was quite a shock for Johnny.

"A-ah, I'm sorry," Johnny stammered, giving Allen a small smile in return. "I'll see you another time."

"It's okay, Johnny. It's nice to see you," Allen replied, indicating for Johnny to come into the room fully.

Johnny shut the door behind him, walking into the room and finding a chair to sit down in, which was on the other side of Lavi's bed. Johnny looked at the red haired teen in the bed before him, expression saddening.

"Is Lavi okay?" Johnny asked softly, turning towards Allen.

"I hope so…" was all Allen said in reply, eyes downcast and full of many hidden emotions. Deciding to move onto another subject matter, hating to see Allen looking so depressed, Johnny gave the white haired teen a small smile.

"Well, Allen, I need to ask you a favour, if it's okay with you," Johnny stated, sitting up in his chair a little.

"What is it?" Allen asked, tilting his head.

"W-well, I'm taking someone out for dinner, and I want to, well, be all presentable and act like a gentleman, like you!" Johnny answered, smiling warmly. "Could you help me, Allen?"

For quite a while Allen was silent, simply looking at Johnny with a bewildered expression. The bespectacled man's warm expression, and the faith that was in his eyes stunned Allen a little, especially considering the looks he had been given by other members of the Order lately.

All Allen saw from Johnny was warmth, happiness, and trust; it made Allen's cheeks flush slightly in both embarrassment and bashfulness.

"Well, umm, I'm sure I can help you, Johnny," Allen said after a while, rubbing his left arm a little as he spoke. "Who are you taking out?"

"Her name is Miss Lou Fa. She's from the Asia Branch," Johnny replied, a slight blush arising on his cheeks.

Allen blinked several times, stunned. Then, giving Johnny a wide and genuine smile, Allen laughed a little.

"Then I'm more than happy to help – Miss Lou Fa is a good friend of mine."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"Have I answered enough of your questions yet?"

Kanda gripped his coat tightly, glaring at the man before him.

"You haven't really answered any of them, _kono yarou_," Kanda snapped. "Vague answers don't tell me shit!"

The Cardinal sighed, rolling his eyes a little.

"I cannot give you all the answers now, because it is not the right time. Yes, I know who the accomodator of the Heart is. Yes, I could tell all of you who that person is. But I can't."

"Why not?" Kanda demanded. "How are stupid bits of poetry gonna help us?"

"The Heart's accomodator needs to find out for his or herself who he or she really is. I can't tell this person, nor any of you, because it does not work that way," the Cardinal explained, tone turning slightly menacing as he spoke. "You should be grateful that I'm even helping; the Heart won't reveal itself unless it really has to, by which point the human race will be beyond saving and all of you will die."

Kanda fell silent, gritting his teeth and looking to the side, narrowing his eyes. Men like the man before him aggravated him greatly, coming up with what he viewed as pointless reasons for being vague and sending people out on wild goose chases. But, Kanda knew that the Cardinal wasn't lying; Kanda was good at judging if someone was a liar or not, and the man before him was telling the truth.

"Fine, so we have to keep chasing after these bits of paper so that the Heart realises who it is," Kanda muttered, crossing his arms. "But who exactly are you? Saying you're not human doesn't tell me enough."

"Does that not satisfy your curiousity enough?" the Cardinal asked with a chuckle. "I am not of human flesh, though it appears to be that way. I am immortal, undying, part of a higher cosmos than you humans."

"Still vague," Kanda deadpanned, glaring at the Cardinal.

"Curiousity killed the cat, you know," the Cardinal murmured with a small smile, eyes glinting behind his glasses. "All will be revealed to you soon enough, have patience."

That was it for Kanda; the man's patronising tone tipped him over the edge.

Drawing Mugen with a snarl, grabbing the Cardinal by the collar and lifting him up slightly, Kanda slammed the man into the wall behind him, ignoring Miranda's squeaks of protest from beside him.

"I don't know who you think you are," Kanda snapped, tightening his grip around the Cardinal's neck. "I _hate_ condescending people like you."

The Cardinal didn't reply, simply chuckling. Then, to the surprise of both Kanda and Miranda, the man pushed himself into Kanda's sword. There was no blood from the wound, nor any apparent sign of there being a wound at all. Kanda blinked, stunned.

Before Kanda's very eyes the Cardinal began to change, his human features melting into an amorphous white skin. The man's eyes largened, the pupils black as twilight, a sadisitic grin forming on his inhuman face.

"I am Apocryphos, a sentient Innocence," the being stated as he pushed Kanda aside, the place where Mugen had entered it smoothing over.

Kanda slammed into Miranda, sending the both of them crashing to the ground. Sitting up with a wince, Kanda bit back a cry of pain as Mugen suddenly started to burn in his palm, his stigmata throbbing wildly on his forears. Miranda gasped as her Innocence did the same; she dropped the disk in her hands as they burned fiercely in her grasp.

The white being before them started to laugh, finding their pain amusing. Then, almost as if the two of them had hallucinated it, Miranda and Kanda saw the being transform back into the 'friendly' bespectacled man from before.

"Is your curiosity satisfied now, hmm?" the man asked with a smile, offering the two Exorcists his hands to help them up.

They refused his help, of course.

"Are there more sentient Innocences like you then?" Miranda managed to ask after a while, standing up alongside Kanda, her voice shaking slightly. The Cardinal simply smiled in reply.

"That is not for me to say," he answered blankly, sitting down in his seat again and brushing himself down a little. "There might be, there might not be. Who can say?"

"We get it," Kanda grunted, sheathing Mugen with a scowl.

There was a deep silence after that, leaving Miranda and even Kanda feeling uneasy after what had just occured. They had not been expecting such violence from the Cardinal, despite the menacing aura he seemed to exhibit at times. And to meet someone that wasn't human, yet was on the side of the Church, was a little hard to believe.

"How do we know you aren't working for the Noah?" Kanda asked after a while, distrust lacing his voice as he spoke. "Can we trust you?"

"You are going to have to trust me," the Cardinal replied simply, pushing his glasses up his nose with a small smile, eyes glinting with an emotion Kanda couldn't identify. "I'm leading you to the other poems after all."

As he said this, the Cardinal reached into his coat pocket, taking out a piece of parchment and handing it to Kanda. It depicted a huge ship, a Japanese flag flying from its mast. It was sinking into the sea, flames eating away at the entire vessel. At the bottom, the name of an Emperor was stated.

"The next poem is at the wreckage left behind after the Battle of Dan-no-ura, 1185. It's your job to go and get it."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The city of Gothenburg was bustling with activity, many hundreds of people moving to and fro along the wide paved streets. Lenalee and Chaoji made their way along one of them, both holding newspapers in their arms as they headed to the city centre.

"It'll take forever to find any news here!" Chaoji complained, nearly dropping the bundles of paper in his arms as a cart just about avoided hitting him, the horses in front neighing loudly as their driver whipped them. Lenalee sighed; she couldn't help but agree.

"The Finders are helping us too, though," Lenalee countered with a smile. "It might take a few days, maybe even a week. But we'll know soon enough whether or not the next poem or clue is here."

Chaoji didn't reply, simply muttering a little under his breath about the injustice of it all, wishing he was back at the Order with a nice mug of tea. Or better yet, beer.

It was bitterly cold, a biting wind making them clutch their cloaks tightly around them. Most of the Northern Hemisphere was being held tightly in Winter's grasp, and the recent snow piled up on either side of the streets showed that Spring was still quite a way away in this corner of the world.

After half an hour passed, with even more newspapers being carried in their arms, Lenalee and Chaoji found a quiet out-of-the-way cafe to sit at. They had ten newspapers between them, written in a mixture of Swedish and English. Neither of them could speak Swedish, but a few of the Finders with them could, and one of them had promised to find them later on in the day to help them.

Reading through the English ones took much longer than expected, some of the stories proving distracting for Chaoji at least, until Lenalee berated him for it. It was nearing dusk by the time they finished with their piles of newspapers, and the cafe was about to close. The two of them had managed to get through three plates of pastries and several mugs of tea, so the owner of the cafe was actually a little sad when he told them they had to leave.

Entering the bitter cold outside once more, the two Exorcists found an inn to stay at, which was only a ten minute walk from the cafe. Notifying the Finders about their location through her golem, Lenalee payed for two separate rooms in the east wing of the inn. Making their way upstairs, Lenalee bid Chaoji goodnight and entered her room.

It was well decorated, with a small sofa as well as a large and spacious bed. The room was painted a dark violet colour, with the curtains and bedspreads being of a light lavender in colour. There was a wide window on the far side of the room, giving Lenalee a beautiful view of the sleeping city outside. There was also a door to her right, where there was a large bath, sink, toilet, and pile of fresh towels. Humming appreciatively, Lenalee put down the items in her arms and flopped down onto the bed, sighing contentedly and closing her eyes.

After a little while she stood up and had a bath, allowing her tired muscles to relax. Lenalee missed having longer hair, for she could always use it as an excuse to have extra long baths or showers. As this came to mind, Lenalee found herself thinking of home.

Getting out of the warm water with a sigh, wrapping herself in a towel, Lenalee ignored the lump in her throat as the image of her 'family' came to mind, the cracks evident where she had lost people and was losing people too. Lenalee missed the times when everyone was still there, and no-one had died; dealing with the war was at least easier that way. Having two of the most important people in her life missing was getting harder and harder to deal with.

Suddenly, startling Lenalee, her golem started flashing just as she was drying herself.

"Hello?" Lenalee called, quickly drying her hair and getting dressed in her uniform in case she needed to head out.

"Lenalee, you need to come back right away."

It was Kanda, sounding slightly tetchy. Frowning, and wondering what was bothering him, Lenalee did up the buttons on her jacket.

"What's wrong, Kanda?" she asked. "Why do we need to come back?"

"We've found the next clue, and a guy who's gonna help us find the rest," Kanda replied quickly. "Don't ask why, just do it and be quick about it."

As simple as that, Kanda cut the connection. Blinking a few times, and feeling annoyed that the past few hours had been meangingless, Lenalee gathered up all her things and left the room behind, ignoring her body's cry for sleep and rest.

"Wake up!" Lenalee called, knocking on Chaoji's door. With a few stumbles and curses Chaoji reached the door, looking exhausted.

"Where's the fire?" he mumbled, rubbing his eyes. Lenalee sighed.

"We've been called back. Get ready to leave. You have a minute."

As simple as that, Lenalee shut the door and waited outside. In under a minute, though Lenalee wasn't counting, Chaoji was fully dressed in his uniform, looking tired and grumpy.

"Are we getting the train?" he asked with a yawn, following Lenalee down the stairs and out of the inn into the freezing night outside. Lenalee shook her head after a moment's thought.

"I'll use my Innocence; we don't have much time to get back by the sound of it."

Gulping nervously, since Chaoji knew the speed at which Lenalee could travel, he followed his comrade hesitantly to the outskirts of the city. It took them around 40 minutes, and both of them were wishing they were inside by the time they reached the outskirts.

Giving Lenalee a nod to show he was ready, Chaoji wrapped his arms around Lenalee with a slight blush on his cheeks, closing his eyes tightly as Lenalee activated her Innocence.

"Innocence, activate!"

The bracelets around Lenalee's ankles morphed and transformed into dark ruby red boots that were just higher than her knees, a butterfly-shaped object forming at the back of each heel. Closing her eyes and concentrating, Lenalee's Dark Boots responded to her thoughts and sent her flying high into the air. It was even colder higher up, but Lenalee ignored it and landed on a nearby tree top.

"Ready?" she asked, smiling sympathetically at Chaoji, who was clutching her tightly.

"As ready as I'll ever be," the man replied shakily, tightening his grip.

Lenalee smiled a little then, scattering a cascade of leaves everywhere as she did so, Lenalee flew through the air, following the train tracks back to Stockholm, where the Ark gate would be waiting for them.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The library was quiet, the sound of nightime birds drifting through the open windows, the smell of wet grass mingling with the scent of old books and the smoke of burnt-out candles. Sitting down at one of the wooden desks, smoking thoughtfully from a pipe and sending smoke rings up towards the ceiling, was Bookman.

Before him, opened somewhere in the middle of the book, was John Milton's Paradise Lost. Bookman respected good literature, as well as good poetry, and somehow the words before him depicting the many stages of hell seemed to cheer him up.

Raising a hand to his head, still thinking there was hair there to stroke, Bookman gave a sigh and placed his hand beside his other one, which was holding one edge of the book before him carefully.

Being Erased had led Bookman to start contemplating his life so far, and the events that had led him to his current point. All the successes, mistakes, regrets, good times, bad times... Bookmen were not supposed to focus on the past but, now that he was no longer playing that role, Bookman could not help but think back on his past actions.

Was taking Lavi on as his apprentice really the right thing to have done? Would leaving the boy, sitting in a pool of blood, catatonic and orphaned, have changed how things had ended up? Should he have been harsher with Lavi?

As these questions came to mind, Bookman shoved them away with an irritable sigh. No matter what he had done, there was no use asking himself what would have happened if he had done things differently. Ultimately, he could not go back and change what he had done, so he was stuck with his current situation whether he liked it or not.

He missed his hair though.

"The brat will never let me live it down..." Bookman grumbled quietly, taking a deep breath in from his pipe and letting it out slowly.

It was going to be weird, no doubt about it. Not having such a clear rule-bound life was going to be difficult, and starting to show emotion was going to be even more difficult; having the spells destroyed also led Bookman to have less control over his human emotions, so he had no choice in the matter.

But, in a way, even if it saddened him to have failed his brother, Clan, and his master, Bookman felt the smallest spark of freedom inside his heart, and it wasn't a bad feeling to have.

"Hmm... I can let out my sadistic side more often now..."

As he said this, Bookman let out a small laugh and smirked a little, blowing out his pipe and closing the book before him. There were a few lit candles nearby, which Bookman was just about to blow out before the door to the library opened.

Standing in the doorway, looking morose, was Medic. She looked as if she had been crying a lot; her eyes were puffy and red-rimmed, and she kept sniffing every few seconds as well.

Bookman said nothing for a little while, observing the brunette woman in the crumpled lavender uniform with narrowed eyes. Then, taking a few steps forward, Bookman reached up and patted one of Medic's shoulders.

"No use crying over spilt milk, hmm?"

Medic blinked a few times, then smiled through the new set of tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Yeah, I guess..."

They stood in silence for a while, interrupted by Medic's sniffs. Then, rubbing her face with a tissue, Medic gave Bookman a smile.

"So, ready to find a name and settle down, _jiji_?"

"Call me that again, and I'll start calling you what the brat does."

"You wouldn't dare!"

Bookman smirked a little. Then, just as he was about to make a comeback, he remembered something important.

"Ah, I'm getting old..." Bookman murmured, rubbing his forehead. He looked up and met Medic's gaze. "I was informed by the Council that you have the choice to go back or stay here. Either way, they want the Ark Gate closed."

Medic's eyes widened, her jaw dropping slightly; she hadn't even thought about her duties back at the Clan building.

On one hand, the thought of staying at the Order filled Medic with happiness; she liked Matron a lot, and would hate to part with Lavi and Allen, and now Bookman too. But, on the other hand, the Bookman Clan was her home, and it had been that way since she was born. Her parents had both been Medics before her, and it had been her duty to be a Medic since birth. She had no name, being called Medic Junior, or Medic-chan to some.

Could she really abandon the duty she had had for all 30 years of her life? But could she abandon the new friends that she had made, who had become so important to her?

"I can tell that you need some time," Bookman murmured quietly. "I don't expect an answer now. Tell me when you're ready, so Allen can close the gate either with or without you crossing it."

With that, Bookman left the library, leaving Medic to stand in the dim candlelight on her own.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

By the time they crossed the Ark gate at Oslo, Kanda thought he was going to commit mass homicide and kill everyone around him. The Cardinal spent the rest of the train journey smiling, humming under his breath and twiddling his thumbs.

Kanda thought he would never meet anyone more annoying than Lavi or Allen. Now, the two of them seemed as easy to get along with as if they were clones of himself. Kanda then started to contemplate whether he would piss himself off, and then realised he was being an idiot and mentally punched himself.

He blamed the Cardinal for said idiocy, of course.

Miranda had spent the remainder of the journey fearing for her life, and was a nervous wreck by the time they entered the Ark and returned back to the Black Order. Luckily, Kanda had informed both Lenalee and Komui about the arrival of the Cardinal.

As they entered the large hallway where the Ark gate stood, Komui, a group of CROW, and Inspector Lvellie were standing before them, looking serious. Kanda ignored all of them and walked past, eager to eat some soba and train to calm himself down. Miranda stayed by Komui's side, glancing nervously at the Cardinal.

"Welcome to the Black Order," Inspector Lvellie stated, giving the bespectacled man a nod of acknowledgement. "It is an honour to meet someone so high up in the Church."

"Thank you," the Cardinal replied politely, smiling slightly. He then turned towards Komui. "And you are the Chief of the Black Order, am I correct?"

"You are correct," Komui replied.

For a while there was silence, making Miranda feel more and more uneasy. She jumped when the Cardinal suddenly chuckled a little.

"I have been informed that the people who decoded my poems reside here," the Cardinal stated, tone laced with amusement. "Before you drag me somewhere to question me, may I meet them? I am most impressed that they decoded it so fast."

Komui blinked, feeling confused. Then, turning towards Lvellie and receiving a shrug in reply, Komui also shrugged and turned back towards the Cardinal.

"I guess you can," he said quietly. "But we must discuss matters at length in my office afterwards."

"Of course," the Cardinal replied, smiling widely. "Now, show me the way to them?"

Feeling a little uneasy in the man's presence, Komui headed out of the hall and up the stairs towards the infirmary, noting that Lvellie was following them with his group of CROW too. People that passed them all turned to look, frowning and muttering amongst themselves about what was going on.

When they eventually reached the infirmary doors, Komui let the CROW in first before following with the Cardinal and Lvellie behind him. For the briefest moment, Komui felt his blood run cold as if he was about to be attacked, but it passed as quickly as it had arisen.

Matron and Bookman were standing by Lavi's bedside, looking surprised and a little concerned by the large group of people suddenly standing before them. Sitting by Lavi's bedside, fast asleep with his hands entwined in Lavi's, was Allen, his expression peaceful as he slept.

The atmosphere seemed to thicken unbearably in a matter of seconds, and Komui felt a dim sense of panic that something incredibly bad was about to happen. Matron made her way to the front of Lavi's bed, standing between the currently sleeping red head and the crowd of men, feeling the same panic rise inside of her.

Before Lvellie could say a single word, Allen woke up with a start, jolting upwards and grabbing his left arm with a hiss of pain. Looking around, confused, Allen froze when he saw the huge group of people. When his gaze settled on the Cardinal, his eyes widened a little.

The world seemed to stop, the Cardinal's dark eyes meeting Allen's silver ones. The man smiled widely, the friendliness of the smile darkened by his true sadistic nature, that Allen could see from a mile off. Feeling the hairs rise at the back of his neck, Allen managed to stand as his Innocence stopped throbbing, stepping in front of Lavi protectively.

"What's going on Komui?" Allen demanded, still clutching his left arm with his other hand. "Who is this man?"

"His name is the Cardinal, and he is the writer of the poems and clues we've been finding," Komui explained quietly. "He wanted to see Bookman and Lavi, since they decoded the poem."

No-one said anything for a while, the silence becoming increasingly tense as time passed. Allen could not shake off the urge to activate his Innocence, and Bookman narrowed his eyes and observed the Cardinal closely, curious about who the man really was.

A groan punctuated the silence as if someone had shot a gun in the room.

"Five more minutes, you bloody panda."

Everyone froze. Allen swore his heart skipped a beat as he turned, eyes wide, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

Lying down, curled up on his side with a scowl on his face, was Lavi.

"Lavi... ?"

Ignoring the entire room as if no-one else was in there, Allen sat down in the chair behind him, shaking slightly as he stared with wide eyes at the red headed teen before him. Then, very blearily, Lavi opened his eye and blinked a few times, looking confused. Then, when his gaze met Allen's, the red head gave him a wide grin.

"Morning, beansprout! What's with that face? You look like you're gonna cry!"

Allen laughed, tears falling down his cheeks as he gave Lavi the warmest smile he had ever given, meaning it from the bottom of his heart.

"It's Allen, stupid Lavi."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

**Ahhhhhh Lavi! *dances* Do you forgive me now? XD**

**Now Hoshino-san, bring Lavi back into the manga! I need the Laven feels again D: I'm even shipping Yullen now, due to their lovely cute interactions for the past dozen chapters. Like seriously, I used to hate the pairing. But the Alma arc, and the Finding A.W. arc has made me feel the feels and gahhhh help me XDXD Johnny x Allen seems cute to me now too! Where's my Lavi? Bring him back XD And Cross too!**

**And sorry about the lack of translation notes and thank you's - I wanted to put this up before I went to sleep ^^" Hope you enjoyed it everyone!**

**xrowa-chanx**


	19. Chapter 17: An Uncertain Future

**[A/N]: **Hey everyone! Sorry for the late update - I've been so busy at work, and my spare time has mostly been spent seeing friends and my girlfriend too ^^" Oh, and thank you all for the love for the last chapter - only just realised Lavi's been a vegetable from the end of chapter 12, so it was high time for him to wake up hmm? XD

Thank you to those who reviewed/favourited/subscribed *heart*

I've been looking forward to writing this chapter for ages *dances* In fact, the next bit of the plot has been planned since Christmas, so it's high time I got to it at last XD WARNING: Lots of plot and intrigue ahead XD Be prepared for your brain hurting a little ~

**[DISCLAIMER]:** I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_I am human and I need to be loved_

_Just like everybody else does_

The Smiths - How Soon Is Now?

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 17 - An Uncertain Future

The instant Lavi woke up, everything seemed to kick into action.

The Cardinal simply smiled serenely, and almost creepily, as he thanked Lavi and Bookman for decoding the poems and being so clever, to quote his words. He then asked to be shown to Komui's office, who rather reluctantly left the room with a handful of CROW.

Bookman stood and stared, not saying a word and not making any indication that he was there at all. Lavi had not yet noticed him, due to all the attention he was receiving from Allen, so the old man snuck out alongside the crowd of CROW, Komui, and the Cardinal. He knew he technically shouldn't, since he wasn't a Bookman anymore, but he couldn't help but feel that the Cardinal's presence was historically important.

Lvellie stayed exactly where he was, staring at Lavi with narrowed eyes as the red head teased Allen about crying over him, who hit him in the head in reply and told him to grow up, though he said this whilst tears were running down his face.

And Matron stood and sighed one of the biggest sighs of relief that she had ever given, sinking down into a chair and closing her eyes tiredly; caring and worrying over Lavi had taken a lot out of her in the week that she had been doing it, and to see him wake up completely fine put her mind and heart to rest, especially seeing Allen truly smile for the first time in God knows how long.

When everyone had left, and silence lay over the room like a thick choking blanket, Lvellie looked Lavi straight in the eye and asked him a question that he had been wanting to ask for days on end.

"Who killed Howard Link?"

Lavi and Allen fell silent instantly, turning to face Lvellie with wide eyes. Allen sank down into his seat, feeling his heart start to race faster and faster, his hands trembling slightly. Lavi sat and blinked a few times, cocking his head to one side with a slight frown.

"Hang on a sec there," Lavi murmured, narrowing his eye. "Two Spot is dead? When the hell did that happen? How long have I been out of it?"

"What do you remember last?" Lvellie insisted, ignoring Lavi's questions. "What happened that night at Bookman Headquarters?"

Lavi fell silent, feeling a headache coming on as he tried to filter through his memories. It was very slow at first, then he managed to put all the pieces that he had together that were, to be honest, very hazy and confusing themselves.

"I remember... I remember eating at the Cafeteria there," Lavi said after a while, rubbing the side of his head with a wince as it started to pound painfully there. "And then after that I went upstairs, and I think me and Two Spot argued over something..."

As Lavi said this, Allen felt himself stiffen, resisting the urge to look up at the red head beside him and ask more about it; he could guess what the subject matter was, going by how closely Link seemed to have watched the two of them during their stay at Bookman HQ.

What had been said between them?

"And after that... I don't really remember anything clearly," Lavi continued, sighing a little. "I can remember blood; lots of it. And I swear I saw that Tyki bastard there too, but he couldn't have been there so -"

"I saw Tyki there," Allen interrupted, voice quiet. "I walked in while he was there, but I can't remember anything between that and seeing..."

Allen stopped speaking at that, a lump forming in his throat. Lavi resisted the urge to hold Allen's hand and squeeze it, and instead looked up at Lvellie with a resigned smile.

"Sorry, can't tell ya more than that."

Lvellie scowled then, after a while, he nodded and made his way to the door, the remaining CROW following him. Then, he turned back around to face Allen.

"You're free of your restrictions for now, Allen Walker, but we'll continue to keep a very close eye on you."

And, with that, Lvellie and the CROW members left.

"And good riddance to them, I say," Matron said when she was sure they'd gone, huffing and crossing her arms. "I've never liked that cruel man."

"I don't think anyone likes him," Lavi said with a chuckle, smiling. Allen nodded in agreement.

The three of them then fell silent, all lost in their own thoughts. Then, stretching a little as she stood, Matron said she needed to go eat something and left the room.

Allen and Lavi were alone.

"Hey," Lavi said softly, smiling. Allen blinked a few times then returned the smile, looking down at his lap shyly.

"Hey... How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine, actually. And you?"

"Relieved as hell."

As Allen said this his voice cracked a little, and Lavi saw clear as day the strain that the white haired teen had been under while Lavi had been asleep. Reaching forward, Lavi cupped one of Allen's cheeks and rubbed his thumb softly against it, giving Allen a reassuring smile.

"Everything's gonna be fine, Allen," Lavi said gently. "Don't get too down over stuff, yeah?"

Allen's breath hitched, eyes widening slightly as a slight blush came to his cheeks. Then, tentatively, Allen raised a hand and placed it over Lavi's, looking up and giving the red head a warm smile.

"I won't..."

They stayed like that a while, silver eyes meeting green as their hands touched, and the both of them were happy just to be in each other's company. Then, with the shyest of smiles, Allen leant forwards and pressed a gentle kiss against Lavi's forehead.

"I'm glad you're okay."

Allen then stood up, albeit regrettably, gently placing Lavi's hand back in his lap and smiling. Lavi blinked a few times, then gave Allen a bright happy grin.

"Go get some sleep, 'kay?" Lavi asked. "I'll be here when you wake up. Then we can grab some food!"

"Of course," Allen replied with a laugh, heading towards the door. He gave Lavi one last lingering look, his silver eyes filled with such emotion that it stunned Lavi a little. Then, giving the red head a parting wave, Allen left the room, leaving Lavi alone.

The red head leant back against the wall behind him, chuckling quietly as he pressed his fingers against his forehead, single green eye soft with what others would call love. As for Lavi, he would not go as far as to call it that. Not yet.

He had never felt like this before; when he woke up, the first thing he saw was Allen, with silver eyes filled with such happiness and relief and heart-warming adoration that Lavi felt a little bowled over by the pure intensity of it. In all his life, he had never felt so loved and cared for.

He felt like he meant something to someone.

As this thought came to mind, a sharp throbbing in Lavi's head made him wince and clutch his forehead tightly. His vision blurred, and for a second Lavi swore he heard an awfully familiar voice in his ear.

_Who are you?_

Lavi froze and shook his head violently.

"No... I won't let you take me over."

Lavi took a few very deep breaths, shivering slightly as he tried to calm himself down. This wasn't the first time that this had happened. There had been other times, when he experienced rebellion from his other personalities.

A dim memory of fading into blackness, with cruel words breaking him down into nothingness, came to the forefront of Lavi's mind. It made him grimace and shudder, and he could feel his past personas give a similar reaction; deletion was never a nice thing to go through.

But Lavi had fought back. He refused to be deleted. He refused to be shoved aside like the 48 personas prior to him. He refused to let Bookman Junior have his way. And, most of all, Lavi refused to be deleted because of Allen.

He was living a lie; he couldn't deny that fact. 'Lavi' was fake, and Allen had fallen for a lie. It made Lavi wince, thinking of their relationship like that. But it was true. Allen did not know the real him, and Lavi never wanted him to. He wanted Allen to think that the way he was, grinning and being immature and shouting 'Strike!' at pretty women and annoying people with nicknames and personal space intrusions, was his real identity.

Lavi wanted to be 'Lavi', even if 'Lavi' wasn't even real.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Komui's office was silent as everyone went inside, the Cardinal sitting down on the couch in front of Komui's desk with a small smile. The CROW stood around the bespectacled man, whilst Bookman entered the room quietly and stood at the back. Lvellie arrived and made his way to the front of the room, standing beside Komui with a serious expression.

"You are here to give us some much needed answers, I hear," Komui said, sitting down at his desk and staring at the Cardinal through his glasses warily. "Kanda has already told me what he knows, but now it is time for you to divulge us some answers as well."

"Shall I start from the beginning?" the Cardinal asked, smile widening as he felt the whole room tense at his words.

"I think the beginning is an adequate place to start, don't you?" Lvellie answered, nodding and sitting on the edge of Komui's desk. The Cardinal gave a small laugh.

"Then let me start by telling you that your Bible is wrong."

Silence.

"... What do you mean by that?" Komui asked, eyes wide.

"What I mean is that the human race does not know the truth," the Cardinal replied, leaning back in his chair. "You have recorded what you know and wish to be true, but it is not The Truth."

"Then what is 'The Truth'?" Lvellie demanded, eyes narrowing. "What have we been misinformed on?"

"Everything."

This answer stunned the members of the room, and Bookman fought back the urge to make a comment. Every part of him was on edge, his heart racing. He had never felt so excited nor so privileged to be eavesdropping on such a conversation.

"I guess I can tell you some of what is true," the Cardinal continued, grinning widely. "But I cannot tell you all of it, as this Kanda has already made clear to you."

"Yes, I do believe he said you are... very ambiguous at times..." Komui replied, not quoting what Kanda really said for he would be fired on the spot for such bad conduct.

"Well, I guess I can start by saying that God made the world in 6 days, with the 7th day being one of rest, which I'm sure you are all familiar with," the Cardinal explained, interlacing his fingers as he spoke. "And God made the world with Innocence."

"Innocence?" Lvellie echoed, stunned. The Cardinal nodded and narrowed his eyes.

"Yes, and please do shut up; you should never interrupt a story teller whilst they're speaking."

Lvellie stopped speaking, despite the urge to have the man incarcerated in a cell for speaking to him in such a way. But, the curiosity and need to know more prevented Lvellie from saying anything, so the man bit his tongue and allowed the Cardinal to continue.

"So, God made the world with Innocence," the Cardinal repeated. "And on the 7th day, he needed somewhere to house this Innocence. So he made a sentient being to house it, and called it the Heart."

"God eventually created Adam and Eve, and Eve's fall is the same as it is depicted in the Bible. Her and Adam were banished from the Garden of Eden, and were forced to live in the world as we know it many many millennia ago."

"But, Adam was not as forgiving as the Bible depicted him to be. He resented God and his wife for his banishment, even more so when Cain murdered Abel. Adam grew to hate God, and what God stood for, but he hated Eve even more."

"Now, Eve and the Heart were quite close, and had been since the Garden of Eden. The Heart did not believe that Eve had done anything wrong, and stayed by Eve's side throughout. The tension grew between Adam and Eve, as did the tension within the human race as it began to grow and grow, sinning and sinning until God was sick of it."

"He considered killing the human race, but decided against it. And, when Adam snapped and killed Eve, God turned away from humanity and abandoned it."

"Adam killed Eve? God abandoned humanity?" Komui stammered, standing up. "What do you mean, abandoned?"

"Didn't I say not to interrupt?"

The Cardinal's voice turned menacing as he said this, making the CROW stiffen and prepare to intervene. But the bespectacled man did nothing, simply leaning back in his seat and staring at Komui with a menacing smile. Komui sat back down, feeling shaken. Lvellie wasn't doing much better.

"God did not create the Flood as you described it in the Bible. The Great Flood was created when the Heart fought Adam, who you have come to call the Millenium Earl. The Earl won and, when the Heart fell, it split into 109 pieces and created the Flood in the process, wiping out humanity."

"The Earl survived though, having made an Ark before battling with the Heart. He then created the Clan of Noah, who became the fathers of the human race as we know it."

No-one spoke. The whole room was veiled in a stunned silence.

"It must be a shock, to realise God no longer cares for any of you," the Cardinal said with amusement. "You call the Exorcists' God's Apostles, when he turned away from you so very long ago. Innocence remains because of the Heart, and the reason why you have accommodators is so the Heart can destroy the Earl. God has not chosen them at all."

"But what does this mean?" Komui managed to say after a while, head spinning from the sheer amount of information he had just been given. "Why have you told us all this?"

"Why?" the Cardinal echoed, raising an eyebrow. "Because you need to realise that you're fighting _for_ the Innocence, not with it. Ultimately, it will do what it pleases; you are all mere puppets. It will fight how it wishes, and evolve as it wishes. It only conforms to what you wish so that it can reach its ultimate goal."

"Which is what?" Lvellie asked, voice quiet.

"To rejoin with the Heart."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The Cafeteria was busy when Allen entered it, the many tables and benches full of food and people, the clammer and noise of the room making Allen's head hurt a little. He felt quite weak, since it had been a while since he had last eaten something, so Allen ordered an even larger portion of food than he did usually. Not that Jerry minded in the slightest.

By the time he went to sit down, pulling a fully laden trolley of food behind him, the only free table was one with Kanda and a few Finders on it. The Finders were sat on the opposite end of the table to Kanda, for the samurai looked as if he wanted to kill everything in a mile radius.

Smirking a little, since he was in a good mood and pissing Kanda off would only cheer him up further, Allen sat down opposite Kanda and gave him a small smile.

"Hello, Kanda," Allen said politely, sitting down and piling plates and bowls full of food in front of him. "Enjoying your disgusting soba?"

Kanda did not reply, simply drawing his sword and pressing it against Allen's throat, eyes full of murderous intent. Allen gulped, realising rather quickly that he would end up seriously injured if he continued to rile the teen before him.

Grunting and lowering his sword, knowing Allen would rather keep his head than lose it, Kanda went back to eating his soba. Allen, rubbing his neck a little, started wolfing down his food. It was only when he had nearly finished, and Kanda was finishing off his mug of tea, that the raven haired samurai suddenly looked up and met his gaze. Allen frowned.

"What?" Allen questioned, tilting his head.

"Has _baka usagi_ woken up then?" Kanda asked, showing no apparent emotion in his features apart from idle curiousity. Allen nodded in reply.

"He woke up earlier. He seems to be okay, which is good."

"It was probably that Cardinal bastard's fault then."

Allen frowned at that, narrowing his eyes at the sudden vehemence in Kanda's voice.

"T-the Cardinal?" Allen echoed. "What does that man have to do with anything?"

"He affects people's Innocence. Probably stirred _baka usagi_ up from sleeping when he was there," Kanda explained, putting his now empty mug on the tray before him, looking annoyed. "I don't trust that guy. He's fucking creepy."

"I agree," Allen said quietly, leaning back a little with a sigh. "I wonder why he's even here..."

"Don't ask me _moyashi_. Use that tiny brain of your's and figure it out yourself," Kanda countered, smirking a little as Allen stood up indignantly and grabbed hold of his jacket.

"It's Allen, you bloody idiotic no-good girly-faced useless samurai," Allen snapped, glaring at Kanda vehemently. "Or is your mind so pent up on your own idiocy that you can't comprehend people's real names?"

"Wanna go?" Kanda replied, eyes narrowing. "Because I don't mind beating the shit out of you if you don't shut the fuck up."

Allen gritted his teeth, preparing to activate his Innocence. Then he remembered it was sealed.

"I'll get you back for this," Allen grumbled, letting go of Kanda and stepping backwards, looking pissed off as he pushed his trolley of used plates and bowls away. Kanda sat back down with a huff, feeling a little disappointed that he couldn't let out his anger on Allen. Deciding that training would be the best way to prevent him from committing mass homicide, Kanda stood up and headed towards the Training Hall.

Allen headed to the Dormitories instead, feeling tired after all the food he had eaten, though a part of him still wanted to beat the crap out of Kanda. Ignoring the urge to go back and start another fight, Allen made his way to his bedroom so he could get some long-needed sleep.

Upon reaching his room, Allen opened the door only to wrinkle his nose at how unkept it all looked. But, considering he hadn't slept in it in God know's how long, it didn't surprise him that his room looked so unwanted and dusty.

Slumping down on his bed, feeling content with food settling in his stomach, Allen sighed and gave a soft smile. Despite the uneasiness he felt towards the Cardinal, and what his arrival meant for him and the rest of the Order, Allen felt an overwhelming sense of relief at Lavi's awakening.

Allen closed his eyes slowly, drifting off to sleep with the image of Lavi in mind, feeling more content than he had done in a very long time. He had been so worried, not just about who had caused it all, but also if Lavi would ever wake up. Allen had been so scared that Lavi was never going to wake, trapped in a dream world that no-one could rouse him from.

And, as he felt his consciousness slip into the realm of sleep, Allen realised that Lavi was beginning to become a very important person to him.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

When Lenalee and Chaoji returned to the Order, they were windswept and exhausted beyond belief. It had taken Lenalee an hour and a half to reach the Ark Gate at Stockholm, during which Chaoji just about managed not to throw up or pass out.

By the time they reached the capital city of Sweden and went through the Ark Gate, Lenalee could not help but feel worried about what Kanda had told her. Who had he been referring to, and how could this person help them find the other poems?

"Ah, welcome home Lenalee and Chaoji!"

Standing, looking exhausted and somewhat depressed, was Johnny. Lenalee noticed that he looked quite smart underneath his lab coat, so she cocked her head and frowned a little curiously. Johnny noticed and gave her a sad resigned smile.

"If you're wondering why I'm dressed up, I was going to take Miss Lou Fa out for dinner," Johnny said, the faintest of blushes tinging his cheeks. "But now I have to do lots of work again."

"Hopefully you'll be able to take her out soon," Lenalee murmured, patting the scientist on the shoulder with a sympathetic smile. "Why do you have so much work to do all of a sudden?"

"'Cause of that Cardinal guy, the one who knows about the poems?" Johnny replied, pushing his glasses back up his nose. "Things are gonna start happening really quickly after this, so the Chief wanted us to be prepared."

Lenalee fell silent and looked down at her feet, the light catching on the rings around her ankles; her Innocence seemed to glow at the prospect of more fighting. It made Lenalee shudder a little, but she shoved the feeling away and looked up again, forcing out a smile.

"That's good. How is Lavi, by the way?"

Johnny's face suddenly lit up, making Lenalee's eyes widen and her heart start to race. Hope bubbled up inside her and, when Johnny simply gave her a wide happy grin in reply, Lenalee felt the tears build up behind her eyes as she smiled and ran upstairs as fast as her legs could carry her.

She could hear Chaoji follow close behind, but she didn't slow down or wait for him to catch up. All Lenalee could think of and see in her mind was red hair and a single green eye, half closed mischievously as lips pulled up into a wide happy grin.

_Lavi... Lavi's okay!_

When Lenalee reached the infirmary, slamming the door open as she ran inside, her heart filled with warmth at the sight of Lavi sitting up in bed, looking a little haggard and in pain, but awake nonetheless.

"Lavi!"

Lavi winced as Lenalee suddenly hugged him tightly, her arms wrapped around his middle so hard the red head swore he would lose the ability to ever draw breath again. When she pulled away, crying and biting back sobs, Lenalee gave Lavi a half-hearted punch round the face before hugging him again, smiling through her tears.

"I'm so glad you're okay..." Lenalee breathed, burying her face into Lavi's shoulder, soon making the left side of his shirt soaked with tears. Lavi chuckled quietly before gently pushing her away, giving his friend a lopsided grin.

"Of course I'm okay! There's no way something like this would keep me bedridden forever!" Lavi replied. "I ain't giving up just yet."

Lenalee smiled brightly at these words, wiping her tears away with a shaking hand. Just then, Chaoji walked into the room, smiling at Lavi happily.

"It's good to see you awake, Lavi," Chaoji said, leaning against the doorframe. "We were worried we lost you."

"Aw shucks, no need to worry," Lavi murmured, a slight blush dusting his cheeks. "I've had way worse. How have things been, by the way?"

"They've been... okay..." Lenalee murmured in reply, finding a chair to sit down in. "When you came back from Bookman HQ there was a lot of trouble, and Allen had to be in a cell for a while. But luckily Central decided to let him go when Bookman went to Komui about the poems."

"Good ol' Gramps," Lavi said with a grin. Then his face fell a little when Lenalee's words sunk in. "Wait, why was Allen put in a cell?"

"They suspected him of killing Link," Lenalee replied quietly, looking down at her lap with a sombre expression. "Bookman walked in on him... well... looking like..."

Lavi didn't need Lenalee to continue, and his face fell as a rush of concern and worry rose up inside of him. It didn't surprise him, that Central would come to such a conclusion, but what worried Lavi more was what Bookman saw.

"Even if the 14th took over, I don't remember Allen hurting anyone," Lavi stated, tone of voice firm. "Plus, he would never hurt anyone close to him, not even Two Spot. It was Tyki who did it, not Allen."

"I agree," Lenalee answered, wincing a little at the mention of the 14th. But her expression was determined and resolute, like Lavi's. Chaoji kept silent, looking to one side with slightly narrowed eyes; he did not dismiss Allen as innocent so easily. The faith he saw in the two Exorcists before him made him feel slightly guilty, but nevertheless Chaoji could not shake off the distrust he felt towards Allen.

Before anyone could say anything more, someone shoved past Chaoji, sending him flying into a nearby chair. Before Lavi or Lenalee could even react or say anything, Medic grabbed hold of Lavi and hugged him until he could no longer breathe.

When the red head began to turn purple, Medic finally pulled away, tears streaming down her face. She gave a huge sniff and promptly started to sob unintelligibly, the only recognisable words being '_baka usagi-chan_', 'idiot', 'okay', and 'fuck you'. Lavi backed away fearfully, knowing how weird and bipolar Medic got when she was upset or excited.

"I-it's okay, Medic," Lenalee stammered, smiling nervously as she patted the woman on the back.

The brunette sniffed again, wiping her tears on her sleeve with a wobbling lip. Eventually, when she calmed down enough to stop crying and randomly grabbing onto Lavi, Medic sat down on a nearby chair by Lavi's bedside and gave the red head a bright happy smile.

"How are you feeling, _baka usagi-chan_?" she asked. "Hurting at all?"

"My head hurts a little, as do my ribs now, thank you very much," Lavi replied, giving the brunette a slight glare at the pain her violent hugging had caused. "But I'm okay apart from that."

"Good. Have you seen Allen yet?" Medic then asked, her smile softening as she noticed the affection that entered Lavi's single eye.

"Yeah, he's okay," Lavi answered with a gentle smile. "I sent him to go eat and sleep, 'cause he looked like he hadn't done either in ages."

"You'd be right on that one! The poor kid was so worried about you..." Medic stated. "We all were."

"What is it with you guys and worrying!" Lavi exclaimed, blushing a little. "You don't need to worry so much..."

Lenalee and Medic laughed at that, laughing even more when Lavi pouted and crossed his arms childishly. When silence befell the room, Medic suddenly remembered something, her smile growing to a huge grin.

"Oh oh _baka usagi-chan_!" Medic cried, grabbing hold of Lavi's hands. "I have some excellent news for you! It's not good news for Bookman, but I'm sure you'll like the news a lot!"

"Oh?" Lavi asked, tilting his head and narrowing his eye curiously. "What news would that be?"

"You and Bookman have been banished from the Bookman Clan."

Lavi froze.

His eye widened, his heart hammering away loudly in his chest as he found it suddenly impossible to breathe. Lavi felt a ripple of shock run through his entire psyche, from his past personas to the personalities he kept under his control.

Lavi couldn't bite back a cry as a huge jolt of pain in his head made him keel over, eye slamming shut as his vision turned black around the edges. He could hear Bookman Junior panicking and shouting in his mind, making it nearly impossible to keep control over himself and, with a choked sound, Lavi was shoved aside by Bookman Junior.

"Nonononononono I won't let you! I won't I won't I won't I won't!"

Medic, Lenalee and Chaoji all stared with wide eyes as Lavi sat up sharply, single green eye wild with panic and fear. There was something very different about him, and Medic knew a different personality had taken over, having had some experience with them when Lavi was under her care.

Lavi held his head in his hands, feeling tears well up as his heart raced hard and fast in his chest.

"I won't let you delete me. I won't let you!"

Medic's breath hitched at these words, making her stand up and take a few steps back. Lavi's voice had suddenly turned rather violent, and when the red head looked up and met her gaze she flinched, for the sheer aggression in Lavi's eye was painful to see.

"L-Lavi? What's wrong?" Lenalee stammered, alarmed. She took a few steps forward, placing a hand on one of Lavi's trembling ones.

Lavi looked up, eye wide and blurry with tears. Behind the panic and fear, however, Lenalee saw a turbulent bitter anger that made her freeze in shock. Lavi shook his head, tears sliding down over his left cheek.

"I won't let you do it. I want to exist. Don't take that away from me, not after so long."

Lenalee had no idea what Lavi was talking about, but the way her friend's voice cracked pained her, so she pulled Lavi into a soft gentle hug, rubbing his back.

"Nothing bad's going to happen to you," Lenalee breathed. "We won't let anything bad happen to you, Lavi."

As Lenalee said this, Lavi suddenly pushed her away, anger colouring his features.

"That's just it, isn't it. 'Lavi' will be fine," the red head said bitterly, his single eye narrowing as he glared at Lenalee viciously. "'Lavi' can stay. 'Lavi' can keep existing. But I can't. Bookman Junior will be deleted like all the rest, even though he's been there since the beginning."

Lenalee fell into a shocked silence, staring at Lavi with wide eyes. She had seen and heard of this before; multiple personality disorder was more common that it was made out to be, Komui being proof of that (though he was more bipolar than anything). But Lenalee had never expected nor noticed such a thing from Lavi - he had never given any signs of having an unstable mind, nor any indications that he had more than one personality. Lenalee stepped backwards, her heart racing, not knowing what to do nor how to deal with such a different air to Lavi.

Medic however, even though she was just as shocked and surprised as Lenalee and Chaoji, started to put the pieces together and realised rather abruptly that Lavi kept the Bookman side of himself separate. Her eyes widened as she understood what was going on.

"They won't delete you," Medic said softly, taking one of Lavi's hands in her own. The red head turned towards her, eye wide, cheeks wet with tears. "Don't you get it? You can be whoever you want to be now."

"Whoever... I want to be?" Lavi repeated, voice quiet. Medic nodded, smiling gently, rubbing a thumb across Lavi's hand softly and reassuringly, as if he were a small child again.

"Yes, whoever you want to be," Medic replied. "No-one has to be deleted, and no-one has to be trapped by the other ones. You can all be one person."

Lavi blinked then, with a small and slightly unsure smile, Lavi nodded and leant back, eye closing slowly.

"All... one... person..."

As these words drifted from his mouth, sounding faraway and lethargic, Lavi passed out, one last tear sliding down the side of his face into his messy red hair. Medic let go of his hand, smiling softly and pulling the bedcovers over him.

"Is Lavi...?"

The question died on Lenalee's lips. She had no idea what to say, or what to ask. She was confused, shocked, slightly disturbed, but most of all worried. She had never seen such behaviour from Lavi but, though she hated to admit it, she had always had the niggling feeling that there was more to the fake smiles he gave sometimes, just like Allen.

She just didn't think Lavi was that broken inside.

"Lavi needs a bit of rest," Medic said quietly, giving Lenalee a small smile. "He has a troubled mind, and it's high time he got this sorted out."

Lenalee simply nodded in reply, clenching her fists and blinking back frightened tears.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

- baka usagi = stupid rabbit (Japanese)

- moyashi = beansprout (Japanese)

- baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (Japanese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

So that's that. Look forward to chapter 18 when it comes out ~ ;3 I'll try and update as soon as I can...

Much love,

xrowa-chanx


	20. Chapter 18: Change

**[A/N]:** Hey guys ~ I'm glad you like where I'm going with this, and I love the guesses people are making about who the Heart is - it'll be interesting to see how many of you guess right ;D

Anyway anyway, thanks to those who favourited/reviewed/subscribed and enjoy chapter 18 of [PROPHECY / SHIN] ~ *heart*

**[DISCLAIMER]:** I, unfortunately, do not own D Gray Man or any of the characters that Katsura Hoshino-san has created.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

_Someone was hurt before you, wronged before you, hungry before you, frightened before you, beaten before you, humiliated before you, raped before you… yet, someone survived… You can do anything you choose to do. _

Maya Angelou

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Chapter 18 - Change

The room was silent; no sound broke the silence that cloaked and surrounded it. But it was not an unnerving silence, instead being of comfort to the room's single resident, who was sitting on the floor.

Medic sighed and leant back against the bed behind her, closing her eyes and rubbing them with her fingers in frustration. A lot had occured in such a short time for her; before the surprise arrival of Bookman and Lavi not a lot had happened. Nothing especially interesting had taken place between their departure and their return 13 years later.

And then, in the space of a few weeks, Medic had gone through more than she had in her entire lifetime. She no longer knew her place in the world, and it unnerved her.

Being a member of the Bookman Clan had been her life. She had never had any choice in the matter, having been born into the Clan and raised as a medic from birth. There were no other options for Medic, and to be given the chance to leave her whole old life behind scared her a little.

Lavi meant a lot to her, and Medic knew him better than most. She could tell that he had been through a lot since they had last seen each other, and she also knew that she was probably one of the only people Lavi trusted enough to talk to about his past.

Medic was worried about Lavi, especially considering what had happened earlier. The red head's relapse and subsequent shifting of personas alarmed her, and Medic could not shake off the feeling that Lavi was going to be changed when he woke up.

This made Medic worry and wonder about Allen, and how he would react if Lavi was different to how he was expecting him to act. Medic knew that Allen didn't know very much about Lavi and his past, and she could guess that Lavi wouldn't want Allen to know either.

From what Medic had gathered from Bookman, as his apprentice Lavi had to change personas at regular intervals and become a different person wherever they went. 'Lavi' was his 49th persona, and the thought that Lavi had been nearly 50 different people made Medic's head hurt.

So, if 'Lavi' was fake and nothing like who he really was, Medic thought that perhaps Lavi didn't want Allen to realise this, for he had technically fallen for a lie.

This made Medic's heart hurt with sympathy, and she clutched at the front of her jacket with a pained expression. Despite her connections and commitments to the Clan, Medic could not shake off the bond she had with Lavi, nor the new people she had met. Even Bookman meant something to her, and the thought of seeing none of them ever again made Medic's heart hurt more.

But she couldn't just betray the Bookman Clan and leave to stay with two Erased members. The Council would be furious, and Medic felt a rush of panic pass through her as she pictured asking to leave.

Then again, Medic couldn't abandon Lavi and the others. Plus, as well as that, Medic liked the Black Order. She felt like she could be of more use helping in the infirmary with Matron rather than doing virtually nothing back at Bookman Headquarters.

"This is all your fault, _baka usagi-chan_..."

Sighing irritably and opening her eyes slowly, Medic knew that she would have to make a decision quickly. She didn't have much time, which frustrated her and made her feel even more stressed than she did already. But she knew she didn't have any choice, and the sooner she decided the better.

Medic knew that change wasn't always bad, but sometimes going down one route closes off all others, and who knows where one's path can lead.

Which choice was the right one?

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Footsteps, heavy and loud against the stone floor beneath, echoed through the darkly lit corridor, the flicker of torchlight being the only illumination to see by. Walking down it, expression serious, was Malcolm C. Lvellie.

Two CROW followed the man close behind, their cloaks trailing across the floor as they walked, faces obscured by masks. Lvellie ignored them as if they weren't even there, and continued to walk down the corridor, mind whirring with many thoughts and questions.

When he reached a single wooden door at the end of the hallway, Lvellie bid the CROW to stay outside before knocking on the door and entering through it, the door creaking loudly on its hinges.

The room was of great contrast to the hallway outside, being brightly lit with many sources of light. The walls and floor were composed entirely of spotlessly white tiles, and all the room's surfaces were made of stainless steel.

The room was cold, wisps of white vapour appearing before Lvellie's mouth and nose as he breathed. Standing before a table, dressed in clothing a surgeon would wear, was an old man with a severely receding hairline, the lank grey locks scraped back in a ponytail. The old man wore glasses, and his eyes were magnified by the lenses, giving him a bug-like appearance.

"Are you finished?" Lvellie demanded, crossing his arms. The old man nodded.

On the table before the two of them was a body, hidden and covered by a thin white sheet. Pulling it back, folding it neatly at the foot of the table, both men looked down at the corpse of Howard Link.

"The autopsy showed nothing about his death," the old man stated, pushing his glasses higher up his nose with a gloved hand. "I tried to discern if he was killed with Dark Matter or Innocence, but I seem to be unable to find out which one was used."

"What do you mean?" Lvellie asked, frowning. "It should be obvious if one was used instead of the other."

"It should yes," the man replied. "But, for some reason, there is nothing that I can gather from this corpse on who or what killed him."

Lvellie fell silent, looking down at Link's body with a blank expression. He could clearly see the wounds that had killed the man; Link's whole ribcage looked like it had been pulled open, and the man's heart and lungs scarcely resembled anything more than mush. But if there was no evidence of Dark Matter or Innocence being used, what had happened?

No human could do such a thing; it was impossible.

"The Noah of Pleasure has the ability to pass through anything he wishes, correct?" the old man asked, pulling the sheet back over Link's body. "It could have been very easy for him to do such damage and get to this man's heart and lungs."

"I do not think it wise to dismiss Allen Walker's involvement in this either though," Lvellie countered, narrowing his eyes. "He could have done the same damage with his left hand, no?"

"I guess he could have, yes," the man murmured, frowning a little, taking off his gloves as he spoke. "But Allen Walker is an Exorcist, no? I do not believe God would allow such a sin as the murder of a Church official go unpunished."

As the bespectacled old man said this, the Cardinal's words from earlier rang clearly through Lvellie's mind.

_You call the Exorcists' God's Apostles, when he turned away from you so very long ago._

If that was so, Allen could have killed Link without any sort of retribution from God.

"I shall keep a close eye on him still, though," Lvellie said. "Prepare Inspector Link for cremation and for the funeral; it will take place tomorrow."

And, with that, Lvellie left the autopsy room and headed outside, the darkness of the hallway briefly disorientating him. The two CROW were still there, standing on either side of the door. Lvellie gave them both curt nods before continuing down the hallway, the flickers of orange flames making his shadow dance and flutter in the near darkness.

Lvellie could not dismiss Allen's involvement in Link's death. No matter what evidence was dug up about the event, Lvellie was convinced that the white haired Exorcist had something to do with it all, and refused to second guess nor claim that Allen was innocent.

Unless Lvellie had clear unarguable proof that Allen did not kill Link, Lvellie would continue to watch Allen like a hawk. He had started putting measures in to monitor the teen, even when Link was still alive. Allen could get away from the Inspector at times, trying to find sanctuary in his friend's rooms or other places in the Order.

Lvellie would not allow Allen to do anything without him knowing.

_You are all mere puppets._

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

"I'm here again..."

Lavi frowned and blinked a few times, trying to peer through the darkness that surrounded him on all sides. His heart was racing hard and fast in his chest, and he felt nervous that he was trapped within his mind again.

He remembered the feeling of being deleted, and it sent a disgusted shiver down his spine. Lavi refused for such a thing to happen to him again, so he clenched his fists and gritted his teeth as he stared into the darkness ahead, determined not to fall and be gotten rid of.

Time passed, and eventually Lavi began to hear voices calling out from the darkness in front of him. He couldn't really determine what was being said so, taking a deep breath and holding it in, Lavi took a few steps forward.

Suddenly, crouched down on the floor before him, was a little boy. Lavi knew it to be himself, for the boy had the same red hair and complexion that he did. He guessed the boy's age to be around 5 or 6, and Lavi shuddered at the blood that covered the boy.

The boy was only wearing a t-shirt, blood drenching the front of it with a dark red stain. The boy stood up, and looked up at Lavi with wide mismatched eyes. Lavi flinched.

"Why are _you_ here?" he croaked, taking a step backwards.

The child version of himself said nothing, going back to crouching and staring ahead blankly at nothing, rocking slightly. The sight was very unnerving, and Lavi's skin crawled. He found himself unable to look any longer so he turned away, taking a few shaky breaths in and out.

"He can't speak, you know."

Standing a metre or two away, appearing out of nowhere, was a boy of around the same age, dressed in a simple green Chinese shirt and black trousers, a black eyepatch covering his right eye. He was wearing the same clothes that Lavi wore when he stayed at Bookman Headquarters, and the total lack of emotion in the boy's voice made Lavi realise who these versions of himself were.

"I know he can't," Lavi replied, voice quiet. "You're the apathetic one, huh?"

"That would be correct," the boy answered, not even looking up to meet Lavi's gaze. "The other one is nearby too."

The sound of someone whimpering and crying made Lavi look up sharply. Pacing back and forth a few metres away was a third boy, still looking like Lavi's 5 year old self. His single eye was wide with panic and fear, tears streaming down the red headed boy's cheeks, pattering soundlessly onto the hidden floor below. He was dressed in the same clothes as the first boy; a ripped blood covered shirt.

"I'm here too."

Turning around, Lavi saw Bookman Junior standing right behind him, dressed in the clothes Lavi wore when he began to travel as Bookman's apprentice.

"Why are we all here?" Lavi asked, eye wide. "This hasn't happened in..."

"It's been nearly 4 years since we last saw each other," the apathetic one stated, continuing to stare into the darkness with a blank expression. "That time in Ukraine, remember?"

Lavi did remember; it was the time he admitted to Bookman about his eye, and the old man scolded him for not wanting to use it. Lavi's current persona at the time was shoved aside, and one of Lavi's true selves took over, threatening Bookman with a knife.

"I remember," Lavi replied, eye narrowing. "You haven't answered my question though."

"We need to decide what to do now," Bookman Junior stated quietly. "If what Medic said was true, We can be whoever We want to be now."

"N-no-one will be deleted," the crying boy stammered, stopping his pacing briefly and wiping a few tears away. "We're all staying here."

Lavi's expression turned dubious at these words, for the boy's implications suggested that he wished they would all form the same person.

"If We all joined, the others would notice the difference," Lavi murmured, clenching his fists tightly. "And who knows how mentally stable We'd be. We have to be okay enough to fight. We can't be useless to everyone, not now."

"We understand that," the apathetic one countered, eye narrowing a little. "But consider this; yes, the three of us originals have rather... unstable minds. And, yes, Bookman Junior over there has already caused you problems with your comrades."

Bookman Junior scowled a little as this was said, looking indignant.

"But the both of you, and the other 48, have gone through a lot of things that we have not, is that not true?" the apathetic boy continued, turning to face Lavi as he spoke. "Our fears and mental stabilities would be countered by your more stable minds, and your own experiences."

Lavi did not say anything for a long time. He knew that they'd never agree to the set-up they had before; Lavi would never be allowed to be the only one in control, and he couldn't let the others randomly shove him out of the way.

In a battle situation, that could very easily lead to his death or the deaths of his friends.

"I ain't got much of a choice, do I..." Lavi muttered, eye closing as he signed in resignation. "Either way, We're all gonna have control in some way."

"Then let us be all one person," Bookman Junior said quietly, tugging on Lavi's shirt a little. "We cannot delete you, since you are currently in control. I tried but... it didn't work. But do not delete us. Please."

Bookman Junior's voice cracked a little as he said this, and Lavi found himself unable to shove away the younger version of himself, whose single green eye filled with such pleading hope reminded him painfully of how he used to be.

"So there will never be anyone else?" Lavi questioned, looking up at the four boys around him. "It will just be the four of Us?"

"No, not the four of us," Bookman Junior murmured, smiling a little. "The 48 before you will be carried with Us too. And we will be one person after this, not four separate people."

Lavi fell silent, heart hammering in his chest. He felt nervous and very worried about agreeing to what his other personalities wanted. If he wished, he could delete the four of them and act as if he'd been Lavi all along.

Allen and the others would never see the sides of himself that scared him, and they wouldn't ask questions or treat him any differently.

But Lavi knew that the personalities before him had been there since That Day, all those 14 years ago. He had only been in existence for 2 and a half years, and it would be unfair to fully get rid of parts of himself that had been there all along.

"Okay. Let's do it," Lavi said after a while, smiling grimly. "No deletion. We're one person now."

As Lavi said this, Bookman Junior laughed quietly behind him before placing a hand on his back. Lavi felt a pressure, and a very weird light-headed feeling, as he felt the boy behind him disappear.

He could feel the boy in his mind, blending in with his own personality. It made Lavi feel slightly dizzy, but he remained standing, holding his head lightly with one hand. Then, when Lavi looked up again, he noticed that the three other boys were gone.

Dimly, in the endless darkness, Lavi saw a group of people standing before him. They were all him; the people he had been through his 13 years as a Bookman. None of them stepped forwards at first then, somewhat tentatively, the eldest persona there walked towards Lavi and gave him a small smile.

He was dressed in a copper coloured poncho, a large black bandana tied around his forehead. Lavi knew it to be Deak, his 48th persona. He flinched a little, though this was more to do with Road's attack on his mind.

"We're joining too," Deak said firmly, grabbing hold of Lavi's arm and looking him dead in the eye, a note of firm determination in his voice. "We're part of you too."

"I know, Deak," Lavi replied, placing a hand over Deak's and gently removing it from his arm, squeezing it a little in reassurance.

Deak blinked a few times then smiled, placing a hand on Lavi's chest with a murmured 'thank you' before fading away. The other personas then came one by one, with Lavi saying their names in turn from the most recent to the first ones he ever adopted, their ages decreasing as he went.

"Xiba. Etan. Luka. Russo. Qiu. Achille. Dara. Adamo. Nikon. Timofey. Ferruccio. Salma. Pierre. Alexei. Lucio. Haru. Michael. Gervasio. Antonio. Nikolai. Andrès. Fortunato. Oren. Tomás. Osamu. Damian. Ilia. Miykak. Matthew. Alfred. Lewis. Adrian. Takuma. Dmitri. Addie. Akio. Johnathan. Qing. Benjamin. Zhou. Samuel. Jiang. George. Fidel. Ming. Peter. Benigno."

Lavi remembered them all, and they all meant something to him. He remembered being them, and remembered what he had experienced as them. When it came to his first few personas, who were all young and rather traumatised-looking, Lavi ended up hugging them tightly to him as they faded, hating the look they all had in their eye.

His hatred of humanity had been much stronger as a child.

When all of them had gone, joining and mixing with the others, Lavi found himself falling forwards, feeling light-headed and rather confused. Before he could hit the ground beneath his feet, someone caught him. Looking up blearily, breathing hard, Lavi saw one last part of himself.

He was dressed how Lavi was when he lived with his mother and Motoki and he was smiling, though Lavi could see flashes of insanity in the boy's single green eye. It was his past self, but also not. It was a changed him; the person he could have been if he ever became one person long ago.

"Let's go."

Hóng sè took hold of Lavi's hands and smiled down at him, fading slowly and turning to nothing. Lavi felt the boy join his mind, and all faded to black as Lavi finally became one single being. Dimly, in the endless darkness, Lavi felt his lips move as he spoke and fell backwards onto the ground, though everything seemed detached to him.

"What shall We call ourselves?"

_No, what shall you call yourself?_

"Fine, what shall I call myself?"

_It's up to you._

"That's really helpful, ain't it."

_Why don't you just stay as Lavi?_

"... Yeah, Lavi. I like that name..."

_Who are you?_

It was the age old question, but this time it made Lavi smile, for he knew he'd never ask himself that question again.

"I'm Lavi, and I'm an Exorcist."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

The corridors were dark as Bookman headed down them; it was late at night now, and most of the Order was asleep. The Science Department were still awake, of course, but all of them were downstairs in the labs, using coffee as their fuel to stay awake.

What the Cardinal had said thrilled and excited Bookman more than he had ever felt. After all, he had never been allowed to feel before. The thought of God having abandoned the world millions of years ago, and that Innocence was more sentient than all of them perceived it to be, was astounding and slightly ludicrous news.

Bookman knew that the higher-ups of the Church, especially the members of the Vatican, would never admit nor accept that God no longer watched over the world. Anyone who said such a thing would be branded as a heretic and executed.

But the Cardinal was already high-up in the Church hierarchy, and was also obviously not human. Again, Bookman felt a sense of excitement pass through him at the thought of a sentient Innocence that looked human.

Bookman knew that things would move on quickly from this point. He knew that Komui would send Exorcists out with the Cardinal to find the other poems, and that he would begrudgingly trust the 'man' despite his misgivings.

Bookman did not trust the Cardinal, for he could sense clear as day the sadism and cruel insanity behind the man's calm collected exterior. But he knew that the Order didn't have much choice, and Link's death and the possible involvement of the Noah meant that the Order didn't have the time to worry about trusting the Cardinal.

"Visiting hours have long since finished, Bookman."

Standing outside of the infirmary, glaring at Bookman scoldingly, was Matron. Bookman sighed, knowing he was going to have a mountain to climb.

"I must speak with my stupid apprentice," Bookman stated. "He is not injured, and it is of great importance that I speak with him."

"He is asleep!" Matron argued, placing her hands on her hips. "What on Earth could be so important that -"

"What's goin' on?"

The door to the infirmary was now open and, poking his head out of the door, was Lavi. He blinked a few times curiously then he turned to look from Matron to Bookman. He froze.

"G-g-gramps?"

Lavi's jaw dropped as he took in Bookman's appearance, from the utter lack of hair and the tattoos on his scalp, to the missing presence of the dark black paint that Bookman had around his eyes usually.

"Cat got your tongue, brat?" Bookman asked casually, raising an invisible eyebrow.

Lavi was silent for a long time then, taking a deep breath, Lavi burst out laughing and laughed so hard he cried.

"Y-you look ridiculous!" Lavi cried, tears steaming down his left cheek. "A-all your precious hair is gone! A-a-a-and your eyes!"

Lavi continued to laugh and chuckle, leaning against the doorframe of the infirmary for support. Bookman and Matron said nothing.

"Wait..." Lavi said, ceasing his laughter. He leant in closer and frowned. Then his expression turned distraught.

"I CAN'T CALL YOU A STUPID PANDA ANYMORE!"

Lavi then started to cry dramatically, weeping for his lack of entertainment. Bookman was angry now, so he kicked Lavi in the face and sent him flying backwards.

"Yet I still get to call you a stupid brat, so all is well with the world," Bookman stated, walking forwards and poking Lavi's face with his boot. "I believe this is called karma?"

"Oh shut up. I still get to call you old. And now I can call you Baldy too," Lavi commented, grinning up at his former master.

Bookman stamped on Lavi's face, glaring venomously at his ex-apprentice.

"You will do no such thing!"

"That is quite enough!"

Matron stomped forwards and dragged the both of them up by their ears, even Bookman. She then flung them down the corridor.

"If you want to talk, do it elsewhere. Lavi, you're discharged."

And, with that, Matron slammed the door to the infirmary in their faces.

"Well Gramps, looks like I'm free," Lavi murmured, getting up and brushing himself down. He turned towards Bookman and tilted his head curiously. "What did ya wanna talk about?"

"We shall go to the library," Bookman replied, tucking his hands into his sleeves.

For good measure Bookman kicked Lavi and sent him flying into the nearest wall, heading down the dark corridor whilst ignoring Lavi's angry yells and insults. The red head eventually stood up, wincing at his now throbbing head, back, and chest. Then, catching up to Bookman and huffing, Lavi followed the old man to the library.

The room was silent, the air thick and musty. Bookman lit a few candles, leaving Lavi to open some windows to let some fresh air in. Soon enough the library was comfortable enough to be in, and the two former Bookman Clan members found a table to sit down at.

"Right brat," Bookman said, finding his pipe and lighting it with a match. "I have something important to say, so actually listen for once."

"If it's about us being banished Gramps, I know already," Lavi replied, smiling a little as he spoke.

Bookman's eyes widened, then he sighed irritably and took a deep breath in of tobacco.

"I'm guessing that idiot Medic told you," Bookman grumbled, blowing out smoke from his nose. "So, what have you decided to do about it? Are you keeping your 49th persona?"

"Yeah, amongst other things," Lavi answered, looking away and smiling gently. "I'm all one person now; the others are part of me."

Bookman looked surprised, glancing at Lavi with wide eyes. He noticed that Lavi was sitting in a different way to how he would usually; he was not slumped against the back of the chair, legs splayed to the side. He was sat up and had his legs crossed, hands resting in his lap. He was smiling gently instead of grinning, and his eye was filled with a more serious countenance than Bookman had ever seen from his apprentice. He also realised that Lavi had lost the more casual way of speaking he had had when he was 'Lavi', instead adopting a more polite way of speech.

Bookman knew, suddenly, that Lavi had acted up in front of Matron so that he could tell Bookman himself that he was different.

"... I see..." Bookman murmured after a while, narrowing his eyes at his apprentice. "And are you alright?"

"Well, I'm going have to wait and see. Not sure how bad my mind is at the moment," Lavi explained, laughing awkwardly. "I should be okay."

The both of them fell silent after that, lost in their own thoughts. Then, after a while, Lavi turned towards his former master and looked at him curiously.

"Hey Gramps, what about you? I mean, being a Bookman was important to you," Lavi asked, frowning. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, brat," Bookman snapped, whacking Lavi round the face with his pipe. "And being a Bookman should have been important to you as well, _bái chí_!"

"Sorry..." Lavi said awkwardly, rubbing the side of his face. "It might have become important eventually. Just... not yet."

"And now not ever," Bookman added.

Lavi sighed, leaning back in his chair and looking up at the ceiling. It wasn't that being a Bookman hadn't been important to him; what he had been taught during his 14 years as a Bookman apprentice was invaluable to him. He knew more languages than he could count, and had become a very well-rounded intelligent individual, with an analytical mind and the ability to look at something from a logical point of view.

Being a Bookman had taught Lavi the skill of shutting out his emotions during a traumatic incident, which meant that he could handle virtually anything that came his way. Lavi also was exceptionally skilled at analysing people, as well as blending in perfectly to any background or situation.

He would make a damn good spy.

But being Bookman's apprentice had also given Lavi things that he didn't want, and he had missed out on lots of opportunities as well. Seeing so much bloodshed and warfare between human beings had given Lavi a very jaded view of the world.

He hated humanity, even after so many years.

Lavi also had been forced to go through and experience things that deeply affected him. Watching and forcing himself not to help people being tortured, raped, murdered, or a combination of the three left Lavi feeling as if there was blood on his hands that he would never be able to wash off.

Out of duty to the Bookman Code Lavi remained an observer. He forced himself to never help those in need, simply recording the number of deaths and what happened to the victims of war. He also forced himself not to fall in love, though there had been one or two occasions before Allen where Lavi had nearly fallen for someone.

In a way, Lavi was glad he had been banished. There was no conflict now between the feelings he had to hide and his duty as a Bookman, nor between his personalities and his current persona. He was free now to do whatever he wished, be whoever he wanted to be, and fall in love with whoever he wished to.

Well, being in love with Allen would still lead to torture and potential execution by the Church, but at least Bookman would not kill Lavi and mortally wound him for breaking Bookman code.

"So… what did that man in the glasses say then?" Lavi asked curiously after a while, turning towards Bookman with a slight tilt of the head.

"He said a lot of things," Bookman stated plainly, crossing his arms. "Most of which the Vatican will not be pleased to hear. But he knows where the next poems are, having written them of course, and is taking a select group of Exorcists to the next one."

Lavi frowned then turned towards Bookman fully.

"Where's the next one?"

"The Shimonoseki Strait in Japan; he gave the clue to Kanda and Miss Miranda in Norway."

Lavi leant back in his chair, recalling that the next poem or clue after it would be connected to the year 1185. His eye widened.

"Battle of Dan-no-ura, 1185, between the Minamoto clan and the Taira Clan; ended with the death of Emperor Antoku and a win for the Minamoto clan," Lavi stated, earning a nod in reply from Bookman. "So the next poem would be…"

"Underneath the ocean."

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Komui stood and tapped his foot with impatience, gripping a clipboard tightly in his hands. The Cardinal's news had caught him off guard, and to have to send a group of Exorcists away with someone he did not trust in the slightest worried him.

The fact that they had to go to Japan, where the Earl ruled over virtually all of the mainland, also worried Komui extremely. Memories of the Ark incident, and all that had happened when the Exorcists went to Edo, made Komui grip the clipboard in his hands even tighter.

An image of Lenalee's bandaged legs and slightly broken smile came to mind, and it took all of Komui's loyalty to his job to stop himself from calling it all off.

Standing before him, all looking somewhat serious, were the Exorcists of the Black Order.

Komui had called them all before him the morning after he had spoken with the Cardinal, after spending a good deal of time talking to Lvellie about what they must do. Allen was there, despite his Innocence still being sealed, and so was Lavi. Many of the others ran to greet the red head when he entered the hall, as well as Bookman.

The Generals, also, were there. Ever since the Ark incident all but Cross Marian had gone to find more Innocence and accommodators. Cross had been banned from leaving the Order, however, due to his lack of contact with the Order for so long.

The Cardinal and Lvellie stood on either side of Komui; Lvellie to his left, and the Cardinal to his right. Komui did not feel comfortable standing beside either of them.

"I have brought you all here to inform you on what is happening with the poems," Komui stated, looking at all the people before him with a serious expression. "We sent all of you out to find the next poem or clue, and it was Kanda and Miranda who found it in Bergen, Norway. While there they met the Cardinal, who is the writer of the poems."

The Cardinal gave the Exorcists a little wave as his name was mentioned, making most of the Exorcists wave somewhat hesitantly back.

"We have been informed that the poems are meant to help the Heart's accommodator figure out their own identity," Komui continued, looking down at his feet. "So the Heart is one of you Exorcists."

This sent a small ripple of astonishment through the Exorcists, and everyone turned towards each other and whispered quietly, all wondering who it could be. Lenalee and Allen, who had been suspected of being the Heart during the trip to Edo, stood somewhat awkwardly beside each other, silent and ignoring the small weight that had entered their stomachs.

"The next poem is located in the Shimonoseki Strait, just off the southern tip of Japan's biggest island, Honshū," Lvellie explained. "The Cardinal is taking you there, and I am only sending five of you. This mission is going to be very dangerous. The Earl still controls Japan. I do not wish to bring harm to more of you than I have to."

"Are we involved in this?" Klaud Nine demanded, crossing her arms, her monkey Innocence Lau Jimi perched on her shoulder.

"I wish to send one of you with the four other Exorcists, yes," Komui replied, nodding. I feel that the presence of a General would tip things in our favour if things go wrong."

"So who are you picking?" Chaoji asked, tilting his head. "Do we get to choose?"

Komui fell silent, looking down at the floor. He had argued long and hard with Lvellie over who should go, but they knew who the most likely candidates for the Heart were, and they should be the ones to go.

"We are sending Lenalee Lee, Kanda, Arystar Krory, Miranda, and Cross Marian. You have been picked based off of your strengths, which are best suited to this mission."

The whole hall fell silent. Then, curling his fists a little, Allen tried to step forwards, wanting to offer to join and go with his friends. But a hand grabbed his arm and held him back lightly; Allen turned to see Lavi, shaking his head slightly and giving him a pained smile.

"We can't go, Allen," Lavi murmured quietly. "They'll be okay without us."

Allen scowled at the red head but eventually gave in, looking down at the floor with a morose and bitter expression. He wanted to go, and the thought of Lenalee going to Japan again filled Allen with worry. He wanted to protect her, and feared that the Noah would take advantage and try and get to her. But, then again, Allen knew that she would be safe with his master going with them, and Kanda's evolved Innocence would help too, though Allen hated to admit it.

Allen also knew that Lavi was just as concerned as he was, but neither of them could go. Allen was still being treated as suspicious by Lvellie, and Lavi had just woken up from being catatonic. They were yet to be able to go on missions, despite the strength of their Innocence.

They would just have to stay and do what they could to help from the sidelines, no matter how frustrating it was to do so.

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

[TRANSLATIONS]

baka usagi-chan = my dear stupid rabbit (Japanese)

bái chí = idiot (mandarin Chinese)

**/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /**

Sorry that was kinda crap ^^" The next chapter will be better, honest! Please review, and look forward to the next one ~

Much love,

xrowa-chanx


	21. Update news 3

Hey everyone. First off, I'm so sorry about not updating or giving any news for the past month or so. I really am ;n; School, work, and other things have kept me really busy. But that's no excuse; I should have warned you that I was probably going to be on a hiatus. So I'm deeply sorry to you all.

Secondly, I have decided after much deliberation to rewrite my fic **Prophecy : Shin**, because I feel I could have written some parts of it much better, and I wish to change some parts of the plot. So I will be rewriting it, adding to it, and completing it before I upload it. So it won't be up here for a while. I will give it a different title so as not to delete or get rid of my previous work.

I'm not gonna lie, it's gonna take a very long time. Not only will it take time to rewrite what I've already done, but to finish it when I had so many plot ideas for it will take even longer. I will try and get it done by next year.

In the meantime, I will try and add to **What Makes Us Human** as well as adding to my other hiatus fics and doing some oneshots. But my main fic will be on hiatus until I've written it.

I'm really sorry to all my fans. If you want to ask me anything, leave a review, message me on here, or visit my tumblr, the49thname.

I am really sorry guys. I just want to make sure this fic is as good as it can be, and I have to stop editing and rewriting bits as I go because that will just make the plot very confusing ^^" I hope you have enough patience to wait. I love you all ~

xrowa-chanx


	22. Update 241213

Hey there, long time no see. Basically this update is to say the following:

1) I am still alive, yeay

2) I have not abandoned (most of) my stories and have time now to get back into writing

3) I HAVE MOVED! My new account is called the49thname – follow me and watch this space because I will be writing again soon.

Have a good Christmas and New Year.


End file.
